Leo picked up a basket while Ms. Lavender stood at the greenhouse's door. Right after the first night, Leo had changed. He never hesitated when it comes to Zella. Probably, the declaration he did have some backlash.
Leo stated there's nothing before that he won't fall in love. But now, it changed.
He adored all of the things that involved Zella. Her scent, her words, in the way she comes up with rules, the things she do in order to make him happy… everything. Leo liked listening to her breath every time she slept.
Her face was like a baby cocooned close to its mother's chest when she's on a deep sleep, reliving moments in a dream, and chose to stay close with Leo when the darkness succumbed the room. Leo wouldn't resort with anything else but this.
As Leo plucked out burgundy roses on the line, he whispered, "For sure, Laina will like it."
Lavender came up to her side. She turned to the basket he's holding. Leo's focused on getting more light pink and burgundy, a perfect combination for the couples who just started to fall in love. Lavender picked out a red rose, and Leo noticed what she's giving at.
Leo hesitated to put it on the pile. Lavender snickered, "Pink roses meant innocence and appreciation. Burgundy ones are devotion. Mr. Luciano, you fell in love with her. Why can't you give a red rose to her?"
She's one of the most trusted people Leo has got for so long. Ms. Lavender devoted herself to plant more roses in the garden than to date someone outside. Leo talked to her every once in a month, asking her what she'll do if he fired her, but Lavender always promised that she'll stay by his side.
Leo must have found another mother, but she's just 10 years older than him.
Still, she's a guardian. One of those people Leo would lean into if the darkest times happened.
"Ms. Lavender, how…" Leo put down the basket of roses, and retrieved the red rose from her hand. Ms. Lavender hid her hands behind her back, staring at his uncertain face.
"You look different, Leo. I know from the crease of your eye something is bothering you. Plus, you wouldn't find yourself inside the garden plucking out roses to just kill time even if your stomach rumbled."
Besides Randall, Lavender read him so well. She passed as his sister, Leo thought. He smirked, holding the red rose by the stem, avoiding the thorns, and sighed.
Lavender turned to him again, adding, "You fell in love with her, Leo. There's no doubt in it. I saw how much you protected Zella Albert from the outside. Of course, I know everyone here is trusted, but you should be careful, too."
It was one of the fears he hated the most. Leo had never been this afraid his whole time. Probably the last time he did was when… his family died.
"You're the only left in this world, Leo. All five of you share the same fate. We have a lot in common, but based on how long I've worked here, Leo, I saw you the happiest when you're with her," Lavender pointed out. Leo's hand grasped tightly around the stem, and turned to her.
She met his eyes, smiling wide.
"You see, when I saw the two of you at dinner one time when I was passing by a dining hall, I got to see how happy you are. She's joking about something, and you're laughing like crazy. It was the first time I've seen you laugh after a long time, Leo," Lavender concluded.
Leo laid down the red rose, and sighed. Does that mean that he completely… needed Zella Albert in her life? How can he defeat his purpose of still letting her inside the house, when he was supposed to kill her off the streets?
Leo never meant to fall in love with her, but…
"I spent my first night with her two days ago. She thought it wasn't the first time, as I've lie to her a couple of times, Lavender. Zella has been deceived by me, and I've known for a fact this will not be good when the time comes," Leo revealed.
All the lies he spat out wouldn't do him any better. It will sink him down the grave he dug, and no one would rescue him but himself. Zella had only been the one who swerved him out of his compass, who let him take the path, impromptu, like no danger was waiting for them.
Zella was the one who let him grew out of his comfort. He was now out of the zone that he's too careful to step at first sight.
"Leo, what are those lies meant if your feelings are real? Your lips might be deceiving, but this…" she pointed at his chest, and Leo took a second before he turned to his beating heart. Lavender smiled, and let the silence take on for a while.
She continued, "… your heart beats for her. It will never lie."
Leo gritted his teeth. Just the mention of her name awoken his will to live, even though the life he led on was by far cruel and gruesome. He never wanted to show his ruthless side on her, afraid that she won't accept for who he truly was.
Like today, he's lying about her identity. He still continued, knowing that if he said the truth, he'll lose her.
Leo wanted to stay put, but he's advancing in love. If he ever resisted upon taking a step, Leo felt like he's going to die.
"Do you think… she'll be able to accept me even if I'm a bad person?" Leo asked Lavender. He looked at her again, searching for answers. Lavender smiled, and nodded.
He raised his eyebrows. How can that be?
"You're clueless, Leo. You're not a bad person as you claim to be. Your actions didn't define who you are, Leo. It's an order from the start, and you just get used to it every day."
It brought tears in his eyes. It fell down unnoticeably.
"That won't make you a bad person, Leo. You're just doing what you had to do in order to survive."
Lavender never failed to make him cry. Leo wiped the tears, afraid that Zella might pick up and ask why he cried. As he turned to the lawn of roses, Lavender smiled sadly.
She mumbled, "You're too soft to begin with, Leo. I know from your looks your regretting to join the spies for the sake of living. You're doing this to still breathe. And it's nothing wrong at all."
Leo didn't respond, and just let the tears resurfacing to stream down continuously. Right after Zella came, he felt a lot of emotions trashing into his heart like a tiger that has been awoken. Leo wanted to turn back to his normal state, but it's impossible.
As he put the rose in the middle of the roses' arrangements, Leo adored the pattern. It was a mix of devotion, of appreciation, of love and admiration. He closed his eyes, whispering, "How can I dictate my heart at all? I guess it's too hard to do that."
Lavender answered, "Falling in love might sound difficult, but it's easier than you thought."
…
He came inside the mansion with a heavy heart. A lot of worries weigh in his shoulders, keeping himself on a burden that nothing can give away. Leo came in holding a bouquet of freshly harvested roses, and smiled sadly.
Leo rushed to the dining table, but before he can turn, Zella's voice came around in the bottom of the stairs.
"You just went home?"
Her voice lived through, and his heart skipped a beat. Leo turned around, holding those roses, and Zella raised her eyebrows. She immediately lifted the corners of her mouth, sighing, admiring the patterns of the flowers she never saw before.
Leo smiled, hushing, "I plucked out some of the roses in the garden. It's the season."
Zella approached her, and received the bouquet. She grinned.
Leo adored how her flawless cheeks blushed. "You like it?"
Zella giggled a little. It was like music in his ears.
"I love it. You already know the pattern, huh? Ms. Lavender must have helped you with it," Zella pointed out. Leo gritted his teeth, and scratched the base of his skull.
Both of them smiled at each other.
"A little, maybe. Still, I'm the one who arranged it," Leo defended.
Zella laughed heartily. She touched his cheek, soothing it, and asked, "Are you hungry?"
That single touch made him entranced. Leo scaled his arms around her waist, leaned down, and planted a kiss in her lips. It was so heartwarming to come home like this. Leo separated a little, and touched the tip of his nose to hers, hissing, "Hungry for you, my wife."