"Dear Joseph Happy New Year. This year 2022, be UNBEATABLE with the INDOMITABLE Network."
That was the message that woke Joseph up. It was exactly 6a.m, on the 1st of January 2022. A new year had begun. The first person to wish Joseph a happy new year was the number 1 network in Cameroon; MTN. MTN offered very affordable data and call plans. More to that, they possess outstanding customer care services. Though sometimes the customer care was a tad troublesome, these little messages that they sent on important days for their customers were heart-warming. They would send encouraging messages on birthdays, labour days, women's days, youth days, and important religious festivity days. When Joseph read that message, he felt as though the year shall be better as compared to the last. The first thing he did to start the new year was to pick up his diary and write down new year resolutions. It was a routine for everyone to spew out their new year's resolutions and not respect them. But Joseph had decided to become more serious with his second chance. Even though he was tired from the intense crossover night session that he had attended in church, he began doing his chores. Cleaning his room, then the toilet, then the church, and ended up washing his dresses. After that, he looked through his emails. After a few hours of idleness, he went back to bed.
***
"Please be gentle." Joseph faintly heard. He pulled out his ear to listen better.
"What if someone sees us?" Joseph faintly heard again. Though it was faint, he knew the voice. It belonged to Risa. She was speaking from somewhere but Joseph couldn't see her. He couldn't see much. But for a reason he couldn't explain, he felt the direction he had to take. There was no light source, nor was there any means of distinguishing his left from his right but oddly, he knew where to go. As though led by an ethereal being, Joseph felt his body moving. He suddenly came in front of a wooden door. The door opened to a kitchen. As Joseph entered, the voice became more audible. The Kitchen led to another wooden door. As he opened the door, he saw Risa savagely having intercourse with a man. He watched her display an ecstatic face, twisting her body in pleasure, and moaning loudly. He keenly watched, silently with a lot of disgust as the couple fornicated like beasts. They went at it roughly, giving in to each other's desire to literally consume one another. He tried turning back and leaving that hall but his body was stuck. He tried closing his eyes but couldn't. He tried screaming for them to stop but his voice didn't come out. He looked at the man doing such an act with Risa but his face was blurred. He couldn't see it. He forced himself towards them, with the sole aim of separating them. But the whole universe was against him. As he lifted a foot towards them, the whole room began trembling. Despite the tremors, the couple continued pleasuring each other's bodies. The tremors began increasing to a point where the whole room shattered. As the debris from the walls and ceiling was falling on him, Joseph suddenly opened his eyes. Tears slowly rolled down his cheeks, his bed was shaking due to the vibrations of his phone, his rod very rigid and pointing vertically upwards and the cream on the cake, he couldn't move a toe. This time around, he wasn't chained to the bed. He was just having an episode of sleep paralysis. He was well awake and conscious of being awake but he couldn't move. After a few minutes, the paralysis faded away. He sat up, wiped his tears, and picked up his phone. He saw several missed calls from an unknown number. That was the least of his preoccupations. The dream he saw was too real to be a simple dream. Part of him was convinced that that dream was in fact a memory and not a dream.
Meanwhile, Joseph seemed to be having a sour evening, Risa and Leon were partying at a cousin's house. Drinks, food, and loud music were the order of the night. All was great on their side. Joseph's family on the other hand had travelled to the west region of the country since the 25th of December. Traditional meals, drums, and other traditional musical instruments were their potion. Everyone seemed to start the new year either in high spirits or in a drowsy mood. That is how the 1st of January, the day inaugurating the new year 2023 was spent.
The great philosopher, the son of David, explained that we dream at night about what we thought of during the day. Joseph didn't think of another man violating his girl in front of his naked eyes. That dream troubled him for two straight weeks. He tried pushing the dream furthest in his subconscious but it didn't work. After a couple of weeks, the memory of the dream felt so fresh. But spending his day thinking of that obscene scene wasn't going to help him nor give him money. Immediately after the feasts comes work. Students were welcomed with end-of-semester exams. Joseph was one of those invigilating the master's students. Some of them were thrilled to see back their teacher but they noticed a change in his appearance. Invigilating students is generally a quiet moment. It is generally a time when the invigilator looks at his students but doesn't see them. He just sees some heads filling papers to be marked. Added to that, he sees a taxi fare as remuneration for invigilating. That isn't encouraging but there come also other advantages. Precisely, sensual advantages. Indeed, it is during those moments of invigilation that some invigilators become hunters, preying on those young and bold students who are ready to do anything for marks. One would think that only male invigilators have such lewd thoughts but females are not to be exempted. Joseph was at that roundabout where he could take a young guy's money and look left while he cheats. Or take the phone number and address of a voluptuous young lady to enjoy her later. But he didn't do any of that. He just tolerated any action in his hall apart from noise making. The students had the right to copy from their neighbours, change writing sheets, and even change sitting positions. What preoccupied him was that inconceivable dream. Since that day, he refrained from discussing too much with Risa. He had that urge of asking her if she wasn't cheating on him. He decided to focus more on replenishing his pockets. He dived down in his classes at the university, projects, and online teaching. He completely disconnected himself from social life. Risa, on her part, kept calling, leaving text messages, leaving voice notes, and checking on him at the university. She asked for information on all teacher's periods in order to figure out Joseph's teaching timetable. Even with that, he seemed to dodge her. After a certain while, she began being scared. Why did he suddenly begin to run away from her? Did he discover anything about her mischievous dealing? Did some of his memories come back? Those questions kept coursing her mind. She asked his colleagues and his neighbours in his quarter. Joseph seemed to have totally evaded her surveillance. In her panic, on the 13th of February, after the Sunday service, she decided to go wait in front of his door. She waited the whole day but didn't see Joseph's shadow. She got tired and slept in front of his door. She couldn't go back home without a daily report on Joseph's whereabouts. Leon needed to know certain details about Joseph's day, behaviour, and patterns. So, Risa couldn't go back home without a piece of good information. When she woke up, it was past 11 p.m. and Joseph wasn't home. The door to his room was still sealed tight. Maybe he came by and entered without her noticing, she thought. But that was absurd because she was asleep leaning on the door. If Joseph had opened the door, she would have woken up. The nice was not particularly cold at this period of the year. It was hot on the contrary. Her butt left a sweaty trace on the floor, talk less of her back on the door. She removed her shirt and stayed with her bra, wiping off some sweat with her already wet shirt. She looked at the time and it was already 1 a.m. She gave up. She began laughing loudly. Laughing at herself waiting for a guy to such an extent. Laughing at the punishment Uncle Leon was going to give her. Laughing at her own weakness and stupidity. If she had been sincere to Joseph from the start, refraining from indulging in to mundane pleasures, surely, she wouldn't have been here desperately waiting for a guy she didn't even love. The heat was unbearable but Risa kept on waiting. She dozed off again and woke up at 4 a.m due to a gentle stroke on her jaw. When she opened her eyes, Joseph was kneeling close to her with some luggage on his back, gently caressing her left jaw. She didn't know what to say, and even if she had something to say, she didn't know how to say it. What reason could she come up with in order to explain her presence sweating in front of someone's door? Joseph stood up, lifting her up too. He opened the door and let her in, directing her where the toilet was. She silently took the bathing soap and sponge and went to the toilet. A few minutes later, she came back all cleaned and refreshed.
"For what is left of the night, just fit into these and try sleeping very well," Joseph said.
Risa picked up Joseph's light T-shirt (the one he got from the Green City District Hospital) and his Jean trousers. She wore them and warmly lay in bed. She looked at Joseph, with many questions glittering in her eyes.
"Don't worry. Tomorrow all shall be explained and settled. In the meantime, let's sleep a little. Good night sweetheart." Joseph said, closing his eyes and comfortably positioning himself on the bed. Risa stared at his innocent face and part of her began feeling remorseful. But the other part reminded her of what was on the line if she slipped off. She calmly closed her eyes and slept peacefully and quietly.
When Risa woke up, it was past 9 a.m. Joseph was no more in bed and seemed not to be in the room. She still didn't believe all that she had done yesterday in order to see Joseph. As she was contemplating what mess she had found herself in, Joseph entered the room. He had a nylon bag. He removed two covered plates and a bowl from it, followed by two freshly baked bread.
"Breakfast is served. Hope you are hungry because I bought much." Joseph said, smiling widely. Risa opened the bowls. In one there was spaghetti with scrambled eggs. On the order plate, there were slices of watermelon and pineapple. In the last bowl, there were locally made beignets. Risa stood up and took a clean dish from Joseph's pack of dishes and served Joseph. They ate silently. No one coughed anything. The only noises heard were from their eating utensils and their buccal cavities masticating what they received. After eating, Risa kept looking at Joseph without uttering anything. She wanted to know about all that Joseph did when he disappeared from her radar. But she didn't know how to ask. She just remained silent. Joseph cleaned the plates and directly went for a morning bath. When he came back, Risa knew he was going to disappear again, leaving her in a dire situation. She cleared her throat several times in a row. Gesticulating where she sat. Changing her sitting position. All that to draw Joseph's attention. But it didn't seem to work. Joseph was focused on his computer, downloading notes, and doing research. After a very long while, she became bored of the mood and decided to leave. She went to take the dresses she had worn yesterday but couldn't see them.
"Hmmm, Joseph. Where are the dresses I wore yesterday?" She asked, with a lot of struggle.
"Yeah. They were soaking wet with your sweat. So, I washed and dried them on the balcony." Joseph responded, without turning to face her.
"Why? They weren't that dirty. How will I do to go to school?" Risa spoke
"Just wait for them to dry. They won't take long with the kind of sun shining today." Joseph responded.
"My class is at 3 p.m. and it is almost 2 p.m. Judging at how they are, it won't be dry," Risa responded, raising her voice a little.
"Sorry. You will just have to miss today's class." Joseph answered.
"What's wrong with you?" Risa angrily voiced. Joseph stopped what he was doing and faced her.
"What have I done wrong? Will it be the first time that you are dodging a class? Or do you want to arrive at school with my dresses?" Joseph questioned.
"That is not the issue here." Risa delivered.
"Then what is the problem? You can't just be screaming for no good reason." Joseph answered, returning back to his computer and his research. Risa angrily moved toward Joseph, unplugged his PC, slammed the laptop lid, and forcefully turned Joseph in her direction.
"I don't know what's going on with you but I don't like it," Risa began. "Firstly, you disappear for weeks, you don't reply to any of my text messages nor pick up my calls. And now you are behaving as if I wasn't there. Like I meant nothing to you. Is all this a game? Do you still even love me? We can still go back to being friends if that is what you want."
"Finally, a bit sincerity," Joseph responded with a comforting smile. Risa still didn't get what was happening to her. She didn't have any real affection for Joseph. Her dating Joseph, was because she wanted to take revenge on a certain guy who dumped her. She went toward Joseph and asked him out without any love, attention, or interest. But why then was she behaving as if she was jealous? Why did she suddenly scream out of anger? Normally she always had a smiling face. A face never voicing her feelings or admitting to her wrongs. All she did was pretend to love Joseph. But seems as if Joseph had seen all through her charade. This was even more surprising because her acting was perfect. She had dated Joseph for almost a year (before he went for a 3months sojourn in the hospital) and she had never slipped nor given out anything that would question her love for him. Then how come things have suddenly taken a U-turn? All these ideas kept flooding her mind and she exteriorised her thoughts by being angry at Joseph, screaming, and pushing Joseph from where he sat. Joseph held her and hugged her tight.
"You have to be angry. Scream hard as you can. Punch me if you wish. You need to evacuate all that." Joseph said.
"Why are you behaving like this?" Risa asked, sobbing softly.
"I had to see if you still loved me." Joseph commenced. "Since my hospital episode, you have been acting in a robotic manner with me. You behave as if someone was forcing you to be with me. So, I took my distance. I wanted to see you come back. Had it been you came softly, sliding aside my disappearance with one of your logical reasons, we would have stopped our relationship today. Your behaviour today shows you still love me."
Risa was without words. She was in love with Joseph unconsciously. Her brain wasn't in phase with her heart and actions. She fell to her knees, surprised by Joseph's deductions.
"And as I promised you, all will be explained. All has been explained." Joseph said, moving toward his dressing wardrobe. He removed a box written JUMIA on it. He handed it to Risa.
"Open it. It justifies part of my long absence too." Joseph spoke.
Risa opened the box and saw a robe in a plastic bag. On the plastic bag, it was written 'African Collection of GUCCI robes; Kenyan Style'.
"You were crying about having no dress, right? Get dressed. Let's not forget that today is the special day set aside for love. Let's go rekindle our love around a table of expensive food and drinks." Joseph said, clapping his hands and skipping like a little kid towards his wardrobe again.
When the couple entered the WHITE HOUSE, their presence didn't go unnoticed. To be more specific, from the moment they left Joseph's room till when they arrived at the WHITE HOUSE, everyone looked at them. In the taxi, the driver and passengers discretely eyed them. They couldn't help themselves from looking at Risa in her superb robe. Some kept wondering if she was Cameroonian. The WHITE HOUSE is a restaurant found in the RICH MAN'S quarter (yes. One can immediately guess the calibre of things in that restaurant). Unlike THE FAMOUS, the WHITE HOUSE was known for its buffet and flexible prices. With an amount of 30,000CFA francs, a couple could eat and drink expensive champagne, wine, or homemade juice to their fill. With that same amount, you were authorized to do several turns at the buffet table. So long as your stomach could withhold, you had the right to empty the buffet table. Joseph had reserved a special position for their rendezvous. The position was the last sit at the back of the restaurant. A little far from the buffet table but very isolated and far from external noise. The aim was the rendezvous was to celebrate the love feast (that was pretty obvious) but also rejuvenate his relationship. Eyes were not only fixed on Risa's attire. People kept wondering who was the gentleman accompanying her. Joseph had worn a tuxedo. It was a men's Kingsman double-breasted navy pinstripe suit, shipped from the USA. It cost him 150dollars (including shipping expenses), equivalent to 97000 CFA francs. The size was perfect on him, with no signs of overflow material. That was indeed a fitting outfit for such an event. Their sitting position was ideal for a calm and responsive discussion but the distance from the buffet table was a slight issue. When he took that position, he didn't take into account their outfits. Yes, due to their illuminating outfit, any action or noise coming from their position most a motive to look at them. Talk less of going to serve themselves. Just walking to and from the buffet made everyone freeze and admire them. After eating quietly and taking some fruits as dessert, they ordered homemade juice and entered into the main reason for their rendezvous.
"So, how are you doing?" Joseph opened the discussion.
"Are you being sarcastic or you are seriously asking?" Risa answered.
"I am seriously asking. Today, we shall make it as though it was our first time meeting each other. We shall discuss, hoping to clarify certain issues. So, permit me to ask again, how are you doing?" Joseph responded.
"Ok. I am fine, thank you. And you?" Risa moved on.
"I am good too. So, Lady Risa would mind telling me your expectations in a love relationship? I wouldn't want to joke around with you without knowing who you are, and what you desire in a date?" Joseph engaged. Joseph had a secondary motive hidden in this formal exchange he had begun. Risa wasn't the only one to have remarked on Joseph's memory impairment. Joseph was the best person to attest of his recent amnesia. So, while he initiated this discussion, he suddenly had an idea of leading Risa to reveal some of the things he had forgotten about her. It wasn't initially part of his plan during this tete a tete but part of him had to make sure of several points. So long as he can remember or his body can remember, he knows he is in love with Risa. But, having discovered some truths about Risa he doesn't understand how a 'normal' person like him could continue loving someone who isn't interested in him. He decided to find out why his heart was so much happy about feeling Risa close to him.
"That question is a hard one." Risa began, with her eyes escaping direct contact with Joseph's. "But sincerely speaking, I am not an exigent person. All I look for in a relationship is attention and love."
"Just that?" Joseph questioned. "Just attention and love. Not money, nor any material thing. Just those two abstract ideas."
"Well, when you put it like that, it seems minim. But trust me, those abstract concepts as you call them are very dear to me." Risa answered, with her face turning sour. Something had happened in Risa's life making her desire attention in any form. Physical, digital, or spiritual.
"I see. But why the fixation on 'attention' and 'love'." Joseph rolled on. Risa cleared her throat.
"Because I am not strong enough to survive alone. I like seeing myself in people's eyes and remarks. I have had to go through some messed-up things, and I was saved by someone who had his eyes only on me. That galvanised me and made me become normal. So, I want a guy who will see me for who I am, what I am, and still love me. Risa answered, with a look of determination in her eyes. She had decided to open up herself to someone other than her dear Uncle Leon. Her heart and brain, after witnessing this exquisite buffet, getting dressed in a very expensive robe, had decided to give Joseph free reign over their actions. Risa had decided to take a huge gamble knowing the consequences.
"That's deep. That's passionate. That's indeed heart-warming." Joseph said, with his eyes lighting up. His dinner au chandelle seemed to be producing beautiful fruits.
"And you Sir Joseph? What are your expectations in a date?" Risa asked.
"All I await is respect, sincerity, and commitment. Those three factors are inseparable in a long-term relationship. For it to work, each party has to be sincere in their actions, feelings and thoughts. They have to be true to each other and to themselves. They have to be committed to one another." Joseph responded.
"Why just those three abstract concepts?" Risa added, with a tune of mockery and sarcasm.
"Touché. But I emphasize on them because we have to both come out as winners in any relationship we entertain." Joseph answered
"That can't be true. Someone always loses in a relationship. Let it be friendship or romance. There is always a losing side." Risa answered.
"That is where you are wrong," Joseph answered, slightly smiling.
"Then prove me wrong," Risa answered.
"You seem to confuse being hurt with losing. Being hurt, when well tackled can be seen as a gain. But losing is different. When I say losing, I speak of —" Joseph abruptly stopped. A little ball having the same size as that of a tennis ball had hit his shoe under the table. He picked up the ball and stood up, waving the ball in his hands for the concerned person to come take it. A little girl, around 5 years, swiftly came towards Joseph. Joseph gave and waved at the little girl. The girl waved in return and ran away. Joseph sat back and looked at Risa's face silently, with his eyes devouring Risa's beauty.
"Is my face having an issue?" Risa asked, wiping off a little gloss on her lips.
"Nothing. I was just contemplating your beauty. You are beautiful Risa." Joseph answered.
"Thank you," Risa answered, with a flagrant blush in her eyes and face.
"So, where was I?" Joseph asked.
"You were on the point of proving me wrong on a certain aspect," Risa responded.
"Indeed. When you lose, you are deprived of a certain essence or substance. And depending on the gravity of your loss, you might be hurt. The depth of the hurt might lead to other irreparable issues." Joseph explained.
"So, you mean that being hurt in a relationship or breaking up doesn't mean you have lost?" Risa asked.
"Yes. If you can get attached to something, then you can still be detached from that thing. But that doesn't mean you have lost that thing in question. It all comes down to a matter of convictions, concepts and perspectives." Joseph answered.
"Come again please." Risa said, laughing. That induced Joseph to laugh too. The little laughter breeze was a refreshing break from abstract ideas surrounding love.
"In the end, I don't want to lose you. We might break up but at least we still remain close. That is winning. It might hurt, for a beginning, but I wouldn't have lost myself or anything else. That is in layman's terms what I meant by winning or losing." Joseph said, recovering difficultly from his laughing period.
"I get you. We don't know what tomorrow holds. If we end up breaking up, I wouldn't want to lose you as a friend." Risa said. To a certain extent, they both cleared their doubts about some aspects of their relationship. They left the question-answer discussion and began discussing about anything that crossed their minds. Movies, art, science, politics, religion and even food. They exchanged, laughed out loud, confronted their souls and in the end found a level of solace in each other. When the clock hit 9p.m, some local slow music was put on in order to soothe everyone still left in the restaurant. Joseph pulled Risa up for a dance. Though there wasn't any dance floor, the couple began moving to the tune of the music being played. They held hands and began swirling in all directions, moving through the little pathways made for free circulation. Everyone watched them playing around in their very formal attire. It was very childish but also had a certain charm. This made some other people join them, rearranging the position of the tables. Making enough space for anyone to dutifully shake his or her body. Risa was surprised by Joseph's boldness and dancing aptitudes. She was discovering a kind, loving and passionate man. She knew Joseph was kind but she never knew he could perk up as such. After an hour and a half period of dancing Joseph put a knee on the floor and looked at Risa. The spectators began joyfully wooing.
"Miss BINGANA Risa." Joseph began.
"Yes, Sir ZENU Joseph." Risa answered.
"I might be redundant but it doesn't matter. I love you. You are to me, a source of joy, comfort, and peace. And I want it to remain as such till the end of times." Joseph poured.
"It is reciprocal," Risa said reluctantly. The Joseph confessing to her was not the Joseph she had always known. Looking at the charismatic calculator, going down on a knee, and seriously confessing to her, made her doubt herself. She began wondering if she merited him.
"It is ok to doubt." Joseph continued as if he could see through Risa's thoughts. "Loving someone is not an easy fit. It takes courage, perseverance, grit and resolve. All that is what I am using to confess boldly to you in this crowd. So, don't be scared. If you are not into it just say."
"Of course, I am into it. I am into you." Risa screamed. The spectators began clapping and jumping around. Though most of them were purely French-speaking and did not understand anything of what Risa and Joseph said, they understood and felt the mood. They knew that the formula of a guy kneeling down to speak to a lady is either to ask for excuses or confess his feelings. Judging from their dressing and the milieu, they all knew that Joseph was confessing to Risa.
"Since the whole multiverse is aligned with our thoughts. Risa, would you mind being my girl? Would you mind engaging in a romantic relationship with me with the intention of getting married in the nearest possible future?" Joseph asked.
"Yes, I do." Risa joyfully responded.
"With our agreement, and as I rise to my feet, so shall our relationship take a new start. With these simple words of agreement, yet a powerful prayer, shall we seal our relationship. We shall move with the sole aim of supporting each other, strengthening one another and above all as God wills it." Joseph concluded, standing up on his feet and embracing Risa tightly.
The spectators increased their screams. Wooing and clamouring at the top of their voices. Then they began screaming in French; "le bisou! Le bisou! Le bisou!" The couple listening to that signal, decided to give what the public desired. They ate off their lips under the clamours of an energetic public. They danced again with the crowd, receiving all sorts of blessings from them. When they were exhausted, they left the restaurant and boarded the first taxi they encountered. The taxi left Risa at a few metres away from her gate and continued with Joseph. Risa looked at the taxi till it disappeared before pressing the doorbell. It was almost midnight when Risa arrived home. One of her cousins that came from the village for administrative affairs opened the gate for her. Upon entering the living room, Leon began the inquiries.
"You are finally back." Leon frowned.
"Yeah, I am," Risa answered shortly and immediately changed her mood.
"I hope you have some good news for me," Leon asked.
"Unfortunately, there is no news for you today. Be it good or bad." Risa responded. Leon frowned at her answer. That wasn't what he wanted to hear.
"One single job. One measly and easy job but yet you can't carry it on. Why am I not surprised?" Leon questioned.
"Every day isn't Sunday. When the opportunity presents itself, you will be informed but there is no news for you today." Risa answered moving in the direction of her room.
"Stop there! Lady. Where do you think, you are going to? Our discussion is not yet finished." Leon voiced angrily, rising to his feet.
"Uncle Leon, we are finished. The day was long and filled with a lot of emotions. You can notice that the dress I am wearing isn't what I left the house with. That alone should be a sufficient hint. Tomorrow is another day and I can't start that without my daily 5hrs of sleep. So, good night, Uncle Leon." Risa sternly answered and went to her bed.
"What has gotten into Risa?" Leon asked himself. Indeed, Risa had never spoken back to him in such a manner. Leon was Risa's first love and so, Leon used that to his advantage (physically and spiritually). Risa always called Leon without using the title 'uncle' because she considered Leon her boyfriend. But during their conversation, she did that. That raised many questions in Leon's mind. Risa had changed. What could possibly be the cause? And how could he make her turn back into that dummy little girl she was? Leon kept on contemplating. Meanwhile, Leon was absorbed in his self-palace, Risa checked if her guy was safely in his room. The couple discussed for a few minutes through SMS before kissing (digitally) each other goodbye. Joseph slept light-heartedly, his heart filled with a sense of fulfilment. Risa too slept light-heartedly, with a high peak of joy causing her to feel her blood racing through her veins.