My heart is visible anyway, only you don't know I miss you... -- Miss You, Hyorin
xxxxxx
[Rinako]
ONE finger tapping my cheek with my chin in the palm of my hand. And then I'd heave a heavy sigh all of a sudden. Why in the world was I acting crazy as I emote here? Yes, I'd still consider what I've been doing as emoting. It was because first and foremost, I wasn't talking to anyone. Second, I nearly couldn't concentrate on my class. Third, I've been quite snappy to almost everyone.
Don't you still consider that as emoting?
Looking outside the window was my drama at the moment. I didn't know why but I could feel that I was lazy to do anything at the moment. I wasn't like this... at least, not usually. It was like I suddenly felt wilted for some reason.
A lot of them were asking why I've been acting like this. But most of them had already concluded several possible reasons for that. I hated to say it but... one of the reasons they were mentioning was perhaps, true.
I was acting like a wilted vegetable (just the walking version) because I hadn't seen Setsuji Jerk for 3 days straight since our last encounter. I've acted that way for that long. It was really weird.
And even though I wanted to feel frustrated because I've been acting like that with that jerk for a reason, I couldn't do it. Though Seiho mentioned the reason why his fraternal twin brother was MIA at the school, it seemed like it wasn't enough for me to calm down. Yes, I would admit that I felt worried for that jerk even if we've already returned to the usual— our clashes had returned (though I wasn't sure if it would still be considered a clash when his actions included flirting and it became one-sided somehow), teasing (since he was the one initiating it)...
...but I knew the former distance we had would never return to the way it was.
But then, did I even have the right to do that? Did I even have the right for me to be worried for him?
"Maybe you should take it easy in staring at the window, my dear cousin. It might melt if you keep it up, you know."
I chose not to pay attention to Mayu's words. I remained staring outside the window with my chin placed on my hand.
"Your worry for him is unbelievable, you know that? You can't even concentrate on what you want to do," she added.
"I have a reason to be worried, okay? I can't believe that he has such a low immune system. And yet he still has the guts to rush in the rain just to take me out of there and prevent me from getting completely wet."
"Well, it only shows that he truly cares for you."
"Yeah, right." I rolled my eyes. I wasn't even sure if I should believe that.
After a few moments more, I grew tired of looking outside the window. I could only see Setsuji Jerk's face, anyway. Seriously unbelievable! Even the skies didn't want to conspire with my mind. I would end up crazy here, I swear!
Just for me to have a diversion, I took the book that I'd been reading since the other day out of my bag and continued reading. But what the heck? How was it that I couldn't concentrate on my reading? And to think that I hadn't reached half of what I was reading. I wasn't like this before.
Upon opening the book to the page where I last read it, it startled me to see the jonquil bookmark placed there. Here we go again... I kept on recalling Setsuji.
Waah! Could there be a way for me to get rid of these weird thoughts easily? It was driving me crazy and had me completely frustrated. But then... it got me thinking.
The message that he wanted to convey to me as he gave the jonquil flower last Valentine's Day, was he serious about that? Until this moment, I kept thinking about it.
For the past months, he kept on giving me flowers that he said were bearing messages he wanted to convey to me. And from there, I could truly feel that his messages were sincere. Don't forget the fact that they also made me truly confused and flustered. Was it still his intention when he gave me that jonquil flower?
Argh! I wanted to shout in frustration, to be honest. And yet I couldn't even let out a single sound.
"But Nako-chan, do you think there's a problem? Seiho didn't attend his classes today," Mayu said and this time, she was the one who placed her chin on the palm of her hand. "Even Shuji-kun wasn't in his school since he has to take care of something, according to his classmates."
"Shuji-kun?" Who was that?
"Mitsuta Shuji. He's Setsuji-kun and Seiho's younger brother. Currently in 3rd-year high school and a consistent honor student."
She seriously stated all that to me?
"You know what, Mayu... You're obvious."
She looked at me. "About what?"
"That you are a certified stalker of the Mitsuta family."
"Hey, I'm not! You're being mean! And besides, I already knew about that for a long time now since Shuji-kun and I are friends."
"Still, you can't deny that you are a stalker." I couldn't help laughing at what she said.
Seriously... Thank you, Mayu, and you helped distract me from my scattered and confused mind.
"I don't know about you." And this witch glared at me. As if it would even affect me.
I was supposed to continue reading when I heard a voice that called out Mayu's name. Out of curiosity (as usual), I raised my head and turned to look at the source of that voice.
I couldn't help frowning when I saw a guy that I couldn't deny had an uncanny resemblance to the Mitsuta twins enter the room. Was this Shuji-kun that Mayu mentioned a while back?
"Hey, Shuji-kun! Why are you here? Is there something wrong?" Mayu immediately asked. What Mayu said only confirmed my speculation.
Shuji stopped in front of Mayu as he panted and soon faced my cousin. "Mayu-nee, I need your help. Can I talk to you outside?"
My frown deepened when I heard that. The tone he used was grave. I couldn't help thinking about Mayu's question to me a while back once again.
Was there indeed a problem?