Shit, I still haven't said anything yet, what should I say?
"Huh?" what? Is all that I have got, why am I so flustered?
"I-I" I stammer leaning my head back and turning my attention to the window out of embarrassment.
I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket, reaching into my pocket, I pull out my phone as it vibrates again.
"Tomorrow is your first day in college, honey"
Indexing back a response to my mom.
"Why did you walk out of the restaurant like that, did you get into some kind of fight?
" Well it's nothing you should be troubled about," he says focusing on the road.
Why did it hurt so much to hear him say that of course I should be concerned dummy you are my roommate for god's sake.....
I reach out to the radio going to turn it up, that's an excellent way to pass the time and to avoid more rude words from Jason, but Jason's hand reaches out to hold mine and halts me in my tracks.
"Wait, I'm sorry okay," he says turning his head in my direction and then focusing back on the road.
Unhurriedly I jerk my hand back, placing it down between us, his not leaving mine, his thumb doing amazing terrifying things as he draws lazy circles over my knuckles.
"You need to tell me what happened back there," I say unable to rip my eyes away from watching our hands which are still touching.
Moments later we pull off to the side of the main road into an empty field, putting his car into park. Jason peers over at me with an intense look in his eyes.
He sighs looking as if he's still finding the right words to say.
"Leaving with me is going to be like hell," he says softly, I can barely make out the words, I'm not even sure if they were spoken for me to hear.
Turning my head to face him, I study his face tracing the outline of his jaw with my eyes, wanting nothing but to plant soft kisses all over those perfect sharp edges of his.
" I am ready to face that hell with you " I don't know why I said it but I'm not afraid of what's going to come next, it just felt right to say all that I meant.
Shutting his eyes, he refuses to look at me as he enunciates.
" You don't know what you are getting yourself into " he states.
He continues not to give me time to rehearse " I keep having visions of someone I used to love dearly, and it hunts me down each time I close my eyes, I just couldn't do anything to save her I condemn
myself for not being able to save her life" he explains, I can tell it hurt him and it still does.
I don't know who he lost but, I just wanna be there for him, we are both facing demons that hunt us every time, and I'm not the right person to get him out of his grief but I will make sure we are going to get through this together, I'm doing this because he's my roommate.
" I wanna be there for you Jason if only you let me in, I wanna be there for you as a friend and as your annoying roommate" I chuckle softly.
He turns from his seat to face me before his hand touches my thigh, I feel the warmth shimmering off of him sending goosebumps dancing all over my body.
The warmth of his palm touches my trembling thigh a sense of relief fills me.
He grips his hand on my thigh a little tighter, and it causes my breath to hitch, not understanding this feeling, I reach out to envelop his hand with mine.
His grip relaxes and I hear his breathing slowing down.
My heart is racing but at least it's only me that can hear its beat.
He turns completely in his seat to face me and reaches out to grab my hands in his.
"Thank you, but there's one more thing," he says, I peek up at him just as his eyes fall to my lips, and I start to speak, but I am cut off by his lips crashing into mine.
We both frantically start grabbing for each other, frantic to get as close as we can in the front seat of the car. I was feeling his needs, his urgency, and his lust for me. I climb over the Center console and rest myself in his lap, his hands tracing along my hips and down to my ass, grinding me into him urgently, he is hard, he's hard down there. I was snaking my hand in his neck pulling him closer, He is groaning, and I moan his name.
" Jason," I gasp, and he pulls back, both of us breathing heavily the car windows filled with fog.
I stare down at him, his smirk back in place, just the way I fancy it.
"W-what are we doing?" I breathe out and he chuckles, pulling me closer to him again. " Exactly what we want to do, Marie," he says softly making me shiver.
He plants a light kiss on my lips, then kisses down my neck, I lean my head back giving him better access, and grin.
This is my first kiss...
" You are so beautiful and too fragile for me, I really shouldn't be thinking about you all day, something about you reminds me of even though we were still kids then, your eyes resemble her," he mumbles.
I stay frozen...
" Please tell me that this was your first kiss?"
I stayed silent just because he is my first kiss, he curses some more " Damn, Marie, you are too good for me" he says.
I'm still on his lap, how did I even get to his lap damn a minute ago I was like an expert, and here I am lamenting myself.
I lift my self off him and climb back into my seat, Both of us smiling so big.
"I've never kissed anyone as good as you, Marie " I smile, melting at the sound of his voice.
What is happening to me!?.
I can't fall for my roommate his 2 years older than me he's probably going to break my heart.