Her expression calmed down, wrinkles and a warm smile formed on her face, "Just kidding! I am getting old, I don't have much sense of humor now…" she sighed and continued, "Why would you go to him? He doesn't have any tolerance! Since he won't be the one to bend this time either, you don't have to bend either…" She took the scissors in her hand and started crafting the plants. "You should rest now…" Shea understood that her mother-in-law wanted some alone time, so she fulfilled her wish and left.
Shea couldn't rest at all since her mind was a mess. Her mother-in-law was right, he would never be the one to bend down. Shea remembered how Chris looked when he was told that he was going to be a brother. She had never seen him so displeased. Even when he was poisoned by the enemies, he still smiled at Shea. 'Am I really doing it right?' Shea was overwhelmed by her choice, she had no answers to this question. Shea thought of herself as selfish but she is a mother, She wants to protect her child. But Chris is her son too. He was the only person Shea could rely on after getting married.
'Go… go see him…' it rang in Shea's ears again. She was feeling nauseous by now. She couldn't hold anymore, she needed answers. She needed to either break or make up the relationship. She got down from the bed and went to the main palace, to his office. He was alone inside. Shea knocked as he looked up at her.
"How do I honor the presence of Miss. Shea?" He asserted sarcastically. Shea didn't wait for him to let her enter inside, which surprised him. And Shea knew what she was going to do would shock him more. After all, she isn't the obedient wife anymore. She is now Shea, just Shea.
"Are you going to be a responsible father?" Shea asked him directly and he nodded, "I am already a responsible father…" Shea wasn't left unaware that he really doesn't consider her children as his child. "On the contrary, you aren't being responsible…"
Shea couldn't hold her hostility anymore, "Then, who the heck told you to f*ck me if you can't even bear the consequences?" She strikes back with anger. Shea was already too furious but who told him to provoke her more. He stood still. "Edgar, I am not the one being irresponsible, it's you… it's you who are…" Shea couldn't explain anymore. She was devastated. He went closer to her.
"Shea…"
She cut him off. She didn't wish to listen to him, his persuasion at all.
"Don't… don't… I hate it! I don't want you to persuade me…" Shea sighed and held her tears back and continued "You don't know how much I want to curse at you… you don't know about it… I am really holding myself back from slapping you…"
"Shea, I just want some time… We trust each other so much, and you…"
"Edgar, your mother told me today… Even Real Couples don't have this much trust in each other like us…"
"Exactly! Don't break my trust!" Shea smiled and confessed, "What can I do when you already broke my dreams, my home, let alone my trust?"
He flinched and said, "When did I destroy your home, Shea? I never attacked…"
"Yeah, you never ravaged the city in exchange for me, your mate!" She took a long breath… "You broke my dreams and wishes… you are the reason my lo…" Shea left out the last words… She was unaware of what to say and whatnot. Her heart and thoughts just wanted to scream curses at him. "When did I last go home…?" Shea asked him, it had been a long time. She got alienated from her own roots. He was devoid of emotions, still now.
"Shea… I am sorry, okay? Five more years… Everything would be great at that time… Chris will become the Successor, we can have a child and you can enjoy all the luxuries… I heard about new products…"
Shea cut him off, "How many years? Huh? Five years? Edgar… You don't know how much things can change at that time… and what are you talking about… Products? What products? Luxuries? Jewelry? Dress? You don't know me at all… what I wish, what I want, what I love and hate… you don't know anything at all…" Shea huffed, no matter how much she tried to hold back, her sniffing sounds could be heard all over. She rubbed her tears, it wasn't the time to cry. It is the time to be strong.
"Let's divorce… let's divorce secretly… I won't come back here after the baby is born… I promise it. I am not after your so-called successor position and luxuries. I am not the perfect Luna you wish me to be. I hope you find someone who can live up to your wish."
He was astonished and speechless. She turned around towards the door but the next moment she felt a grip on her waist, "Stop it, Shea… You surely want to give up all the luxuries and everything? For an unborn thing? Even Chris? You are his mother… He…"
"Mr. Edgar, I am sure that I want to give up everything that you have even if it means going on the road with my child! And I also don't think I have any other option to choose rather than divorce."
She felt his hands loosening up. He was ready to let her go easily like how I did to him. Mother-in-law's words rang again in her ears, 'It's easy to destroy a relationship…'
She had built up their relationship for years but it was too easy to break. She looked back, "One last question, Are you the murderer of my first child?"
He chuckled and asserted, "Didn't you already guess so? Why are you asking then?"
Shea shouldn't have asked him. Otherwise, she wouldn't be as broken as she is now.
A mother would always protect her children, it was the same for Edgar's mother… How could she ask him for her mo- aunt's words? Shea didn't wish to call her mother anymore since the bond she had with her is soon going to be broken. Shea looked at him, maybe for the last time.
"What happened?" His voice was cold like always, Shea thought he loved her suggestion.
"Nothing… Just want to sketch my child's murderer in my mind…" she continued, "I am looking forward to the divorce."
"Mom shouldn't know about this now…" he ordered.
"We aren't related anymore so, don't you order me around and… I don't think telling mo- aunt about this would solve any problem, or rather it will be more of a hassle…"
"Aunt…? It sure was easy for you to forsake the relationship…"
"Yeah too easy… I guess it's easier for you…"
Shea smirked, giving a triumphant smile but deep underneath, she knew how heartbreaking it was for her. Not because of Edgar but the Tribesmen, her Mother, and Chris. If she had any other option, She wouldn't have chosen this for them. She broke down on the ground, finally losing herself.