"Love is an illusion, one that makes life seem worth the while. It's the idea that we create to keep ourselves going. Love, I mean who knows what that's all about. So many compounded theories and yet we still don't know our way around that emotion, that gift and that feeling.
My wife was a beautiful soul that showed me what she believed love was the rosy and yet realistic form of love as she called it. I was mesmerized by her beauty and the way she perceived things. She believed in fairness and I somewhat did too. That intriguing woman gave me a new sense of belief, but I guess just like all the rest I was not enough. Oh handsome I was, I had worked my ass off and had a substantial amount of funds but my so-called mental instability drove her further away from me than I wanted. In my bid to rescue my soulmate I might have killed and lost her for good.
I toke out her kidney and replaced it with one of mine, so we could be one. Is that so bad, I guess maybe she wasn't too healthy for such an exchange, or maybe the sedatives the doctor gave was too strong for her. I don't know, but I had no intention of hurting her, if anything I wanted us to be bound together forever in the soul, body and mind.
Sucks things don't always go as planned, that is exactly what she would have said if she heard me blabbering this much. I still hear her voice, it tells me a lot about the life we could have had if her body and the world didn't go against my plans.
It's complicated, to say the least, but on everything, our love was pure, at least maybe in the beginning.
You know how people paint a mirage of what they want in a person. They push themselves to all lengths to make that person their perfect ideal companion, friend or relative. And when they find out it's not so, they try to change them, make them what they want, what they deem as perfect. That's how my story started with my wife. She saw me in a certain light, that light captivated her and she fell in love. I did the same with her, I saw her as the ideal love partner for me, one that would understand my flaws and still stick by me, not poaching me to change or evolve. But that wasn't the case none of us was ready to compromise, maybe if I wasn't a mad maniac I would have Compromised, because she was worth that and more.
We couldn't bear a child and the problem was on me, she was not a bit bothered with that. Many females yearn for the state of motherhood, my inability deprived her of that but she was okay. She still loved and cherished me. The best gift this universe gave me was my inability, to bring a being into this world with my history, genetics and flaws embedded in that child would be a bloody curse to that child.
So yeah, thank the heavens I can't have a junior, but I've fantasied about it once.
A sunny day by the beach, with my wife in my arms. Walking barefoot and feeling those fine sand between my toes and before us is this beautiful young creature with her ponytail swaying from left to right as she runs towards us. A beautiful girl that would take after my wife. Take after her beauty, her elegance and her pure soul but I would rather not take the risk.
~~~~Hi fam, it's Mard Brooks. Please comment on my chapters as you read. Do share with me your disappointments, views and criticisms. I believe I can only be as good of a writer If I know my flaws as one. Thanks for reading. See you in my next chapter, until then xoxo and ciao~~~~~