"mhmmm" I moaned out at faint sounds that invaded my ears
it sounded like someone was pulling down a building from miles away
"Layla! Open the darn door!!!!"
That voice sounded so familiar but I didn't know where I had heard it from.
"LAYLA!! WAKE THE FUCK UP!!"
My eyes fluttered open immediately from how loud my door was banged.
"Layla!!!" Xaviar called out again
"I'm coming" my voice coming out lesser than expected as I groggily made my way to the door.
"What do you want Xaviar??" I asked as the door opened.
I was welcomed by his addictive Cologne, he always smelled so good. His hair was neatly gelled back and he was dressed in an Armani suit. He was all ready to head to work.
"I've been knocking for a while " his face held a frown
"I was asleep.. It's like 6 in the morning "
"it's 7 actually"
"and why are you still here???!" I questioned, It was so unlike him.
He didn't reply to my question, rather his eyes raked through me, taking in all my shameful features.
I could help but rub my eyes with the back of my hands at this point. I knew I looked like shit, damn I felt like one. My eyes stung from all the crying I had done last night and I guessed it was obviously puffy. I was also pretty sure my hair was sticking out in different directions but I didn't care.
It's not like it mattered to my husband anyways, he had a mistress now.
clearing his throat he begun again rather harshly
"you have to attend a public function today with my mom and sist- -"
"What??? Why" I interrupted
"my publicist says it'll calm down the situation "
I understood what he was talking about.
"How can making an appearance with your family fix the issue with your mistress Xaviar??? You won't even be at the function "
"Shut the fuck up and listen " his hands grabbed the sides of my face roughly
I wandered how he was unaffected by my morning breath.
"You will attend the function, say nice things to the press and play the role of a happy wife, got it?" He stressed every word to which I gave a nod
"Perfetto"
(perfect) he said with a smirk before letting go of my face.
"Blanc will get you the necessary things you need, designers or whatever "
"okay" I hurriedly replied to get away from him
"Also, I want you back to the master bedroom, enough with your charade " He added before walking away. Obviously headed to work.
The preparation for the function was quite fast, it appears Xaviar had stylist and designers come over to help me get ready, probably because he wanted it to turn out perfect and not in shambles.
"Thank you" I offered Blanc a smile as I alight the Bentley Mulsanne. He shut the door and followed right behind me.
with every click my Louis Vuitton Python Eyeline Pointed Toe Pumps made against the ground, my heart beat accelerated as I made my way to the front door of the family I hated most - The Lucasinos.
Blanc knocked briefly and I waited excruciatingly for the door to be answered. My palms became sweaty with fear and I couldn't help but rub it against my black one shoulder ruched slinky midi dress. My eyes moved to the python skinned clutch I held tightly by my side. These few seconds of waiting felt like agony.
I resisted every urge to loosen my hair from the high ponytail it had been styled in. Just when I thought the agony wouldn't be over, the door opened to reveal Keva, my husband's sister.
This made me wonder why this family had servants but yet still answered the door everytime I came over.
"great you're here" She rolled her eyes before letting Blanc and I in.
I was extremely grateful at the choice of lipstick from my makeup artist, Red definitely made my face pop more and gave me both that resting bitch and sassy look.
A little pout was a better reply than to waste words on her.
She was also fully dressed in a Pleated Cape Sleeve Burgundy Bodycon dress, paired with glass heels. She looked real nice but I hated her too much to dish a compliment
My mother in- law was already on her way to meet us when we walked into the living room
"Good morning" I gave a weak smile
"It's almost 1pm child, let's leave already " She replied rudely
it's not actually my fault I fucked up the greeting, she was too scary I just didn't know the right things to say around her. This female could put Lady Tremaine to shame, don't even get me started with her evil daughter Anastasia, nah, she's more like Drizella cause Anastasia had a heart atleast. I wasn't even her step daughter but I felt like Cinderella at the moment.
Blanc and I made our way back to the Bentley while Lady Tremaine and Drizella moved to get in their own ride, their guards scrambling around probably in fear of the duo.
The drive to the location was brief, before I knew it we were parked right out an orphanage.
"l'amore vive qui"
(Love lives here) were written boldy at the signpost.
I suddenly developed mixed feelings, I didn't know how to react or how to act at this place. How would this help restore my tainted image.
Immediately I alighted the vehicle, a petite red-haired female rushed to my side
"Good day Mrs Lucasino, please follow me. Everything has been properly arranged awaiting your arrival"
"Please call me Layla, you are??" I already knew she was my husband's Publicist, I just wanted to get her name
"I'm Brittney" She gave a smile.
Brittney prepped Xaviar's family and I on how to act at the orphanage fund raiser, I was expected to have close relations with both mother and daughter as the press would be taking lots of pictures and keeping an eye out for anything unusual .
As she spoke I couldn't help but notice the stress lines that appeared on her forehead.
Was she affected by this situation also?
Her brown eyes squinted ever so slightly you could miss it if you didn't look real close every time she smiled, she was indeed really beautiful that I couldn't help wonder why her ring finger remained void of a wedding band. I fought the urge to ask her why she wasn't married or at least engaged, she looked like a really nice soul.
When she was done briefing us on what to expect and how to act, both mother and daughter made their way in front while Britney and I followed behind.
"Don't bother about a thing Layla, it'll pass. It'll definitely be okay " She said as if noticing my uneasiness
I was definitely right about her, she was a sweet soul
"You seem like a really nice person Brittney. Why aren't you married though or engaged?" The question flew out my mouth before I could hold back.
Don't get me wrong, she wasn't way old or anything, infact she looked not more than 25years.
"well, it's hard to be committed to someone in a world where nice people like you have to go through what you're going through " She said, her hand squeezed mine lightly before she walked away
she wasn't married because she was scared of being cheated on.
I followed slowly behind Brittney, my head clouded with different thoughts.
If I had ever considered these sort of situations when Xaviar and I were dating I wouldn't have been in a rush to get married but that's life I guess. We unintentionally make wrong dicisions and end up paying for it.
The fund raising eventually started immediately after, it was done in an open garden and true to Brittney's words everything was in place. The organizers of the orphanage welcomed us heartedly along with other prestigious women that graced the occasion.
Brittney was right by my side all the way, picking strategic moments for pictures to be taken and guiding me on how to react to every single movement. Thankfully the press were on their best behaviors, so far I hadn't heard one question about my husband or his mistress.
Nothing could possibly go wrong.
One of the prestigious women, Mrs Maria Fernando was giving a speech when I noticed Keva get off her phone and rise from her seat with a smile on her face.
There was something about her smile that made my curiosity perk up.
I trailed her with my eyes as she made her way to meet a lady whose face was shielded with shades and a hat. They hugged immediately they moved away from the crowd and the lady took off her shades
It was her! My husband's infamous mistress.
But what I couldn't understand was what why Keva had been hugging her.
Where they friends???
"Oh my God!! Look everyone! It's Sophia, Xaviar Lucasino's girlfriend!!" A female voice shrieked pulling my attention back to the duo who were now aware of the eyes on them.
Sophia offered what looked an apologetic smile towards Keva then hurried back to her car before the press could catch up with her. My husband's sister didn't return to her seat either, I was guessing she was at the parking lot or somewhere.
There was a ruckus by now, the press being dramatic about the situation, side comments were made all over the place even by the prestigious women. I on the other hand was rooted in my seat from humiliation.
I looked to my side and found the publicist in a heated conversation with my mother-in-law who looked so nonchalant about the situation.
"why would she even invite her here! You know the type of mess Xaviar is already in.. You know what?, I'm going to talk to her " Brittney said raising her hands in the air to show surrender and frustration
"No! I'll go" I walked away briskly without waiting for a reply. Blanc and my other bodyguards following right after me trying to keep the struggling press at bay
"Mrs Lucasino is your marriage over?"
"Why was your husband's mistress here?"
"Are you going to file for a divorce?"
"why has neither you nor Mr Lucasino addressed the issue?"
the curious crowd of journalists bombarded me with questions I couldn't provide an answer to.
Luckily I didn't have to go to far, I found Keva in a corner away from the frenzy people.
"Stay here" I ordered my guards and moved closer to Drizella
"I see Y'all know each other " I begun
"Well we've been friends long before you came into the picture " She replied turning to look at me
"and that's why you invited her here???"
"I didn't invi- - Although! What difference does it make if I invited her or not?" She raised her eyebrows at me with her armed folded
"What difference?!?? Are you freaking kidding me right now??? Don't you see how this turned out! The aim of this fund raising has been defeated Keva " I replied maliciously
"well there wouldn't be any need for a fund raising if you had just married someone in your status quo and allow my brother marry who he was supposed to" She lashed back
"What??? I didn't chase after Xaviar! Your brother was the one who asked me to be his wife "
"look how that turned out then " She retorted with a pout
"I get it, Y'all know each other and what not but I will not have you spoil tod--"
"No you don't get it Layla! " She begun cutting me off
"Sophia and I are practically best friends! She would have ended up with Xaviar if he hadn't met you on that cursed Sunday! Unfortunately you had him first but thank God he's beginning to see reason!"
At this point I couldn't listen to her rubbish anymore, I called out to Blanc and insisted to be taken home.
The ride home was frustrating, the car felt so hot and suffocating even though the air condition was turned on.
My heart was beating agonizingly slow as Keva's words rang in my head.
if Xaviar never met me he'd probably be married to Sophia.
I suddenly felt like an outsider in my own marriage.
I felt like the odd one out, like the one who didn't fit in.
Is that how everyone saw me?
Like the girl that went out of her league and married a billionaire
like a gold digger???
I willed myself up the stairs, straight to the master bedroom and went for a shower.
I stood there as the warm water cascaded down my weak frame.
Sincerely I had given up
Twenty minutes of standing there in silence, I dried my body, wrapped my hair and made my way to the bed. I didn't care if my hair was damp or not. It's not like my husband would be home now anyways.
it wasn't until my eyes fluttered open all of a sudden that I realized I had slept off. My eyes went to the clock and it read 12:30 am.
My eyes darted to the tray of food neatly placed on the table and my stomach growled instantly.
Blanc must have brought my dinner, or was it the maids?
Moments later I was munching down the lasagna. Although it was cold, I didn't care at the moment,I was really hungry. Once I was done I gulped down the cup of water. Standing up I made my way to the door and opened it up.
Cold air hitting my face abruptly which was followed by the erring silence. I shut the door behind me and went back to the king sized bed.
Having nothing to do, I pulled out a book "We Should All Be Feminists" and decided literature should keep me company.
This book was quite the contrary to my life but I felt intrigued by the message the writer had to pass across, Chimamanda Adichie had me totally locked up with her writing and experience.
About thirty minutes later, my eyes begun hurting for God knows what reason, this made me put the book away and switch off the light. I was already getting comfortable when I heard what seemed like sounds from downstairs.
I guess my whoring husband is home!
To my confirmation, the door to our bedroom opens quietly and there my husband was tiptoeing into our bedroom like some high-school kid.
"Where are you coming from Xaviar?" I questioned turning on the room right and siting up.
he had his back to me
"work" his reply was short and vague
"Oh wow! By 1am??? why are you sneaking in then????"
"I didn't want to wake you " He replied immediately still having his back to me
Honestly Xaviar was a good fucking liar
"Your girlfriend showed up at the fundraiser today. Why didn't you tell me she's close friends with Keva and Y'all would have probably been married if you hadn't met me?!" I pushed on
"What difference would it make?" He replied a minute later before taking sloppy steps to the bathroom
on seeing the way he moved I avoided saying another word and stared at his retreating figure.
"Are you drunk???" I rushed to his side when it looked like he would miss a step and fall over
"more like tipsy" He corrected
"What's wrong with us Xaviar, what's wrong with you " my fingers moved on his cheek as I questioned him
"Nothing! Nothing is fucking wrong with us!" His tone begun rising
"NOTHING?!? AND YOUR BUSY PRANCING ABOUT WITH YOUR MISTRESS?!?" I retorted to which I right away regretted the second he back handed me.
my head wiping to the other side with force.
"non alzare la voce quando parli con me"
(don't raise your voice when you talk to me) he cautioned
"what changed Xaviar?" I managed to push the question out of my mouth
"This is fucking how it is Layla!! This is what marriage feels like!!" His eyes pierced into mine when he said those words but I knew he was lying.
There were other beautifully blessed marriages in the world, mine just wasn't part of it.
"THAT'S A FUCKING LIE!! WE DON'T EVEN HAVE SEX LIKE NORMAL COUPLES DO!" I screamed at him
his lips twitched to the side in his skillful signature smirk at my outburst
"Sex like normal couples huh?" He answered with a low dangerous voice that sent shivers down my spine
His hand instantly caught my hair and he pulled me along with him and tossed me on the bed
"What the fuck are you doing Xaviar!!!" I struggled in his tight hold
"Ti sto dando quello che vuoi"
(I'm giving you what you want). Pulling my face close to his, he whispered in my ear.
As I lay faced down to the pillow, I had to struggle for air when I felt his weight crushing my body
"Get off me!" I yelled struggling with him
I heard his belt come off and he grabbed my hands binding them like I was arrested.
At this point it became clear what intentions my husband had for me.
"Xaviar!"
"Xaviar don't do this!!" I begged as his hands pushed up my night dress to my waist. I felt his cold hands touch my bare skin
"shhh" He cooed
"stop struggling tesoro, isn't this what you wanted "
"NO!PLEASE THIS ISN'T WHAT I WANTED PLEASE! I DON'T WANT TO "
"but you're my wife?? Your body belongs to me, it's mine to have whenever and however I want to " by now he had already pushed my legs apart and was unzipping his trousers
I was somehow grateful for the position he had put me. My back was to him, I couldn't bear to look at his face in such a situation. The pillow where I placed my head was soaked with tears I didn't even know I had begun shedding
" I WON'T F-FORGIVE YO-U IF YOU D-DO THIS!!" I screamed crying
"Non ti stavo chiedendo perdono, piccolo"
(I wasn't asking you for forgiveness, babe) immediately these words left his mouth I felt him violate me and I screamed at a pitch I didn't even know I could hit.
Without even giving me a minute to adjust he continued not caring about the discomfort he was causing.
With each shove, I kept trashing about begging him to stop but he paid no attention to my pleas.
his hard palm would connect to my ass cheek on a regular to stop me from moving too much but I too paid no attention to him.
I kept struggling to free my bounded hands but that too proved abortived, all I could do was cry and scream for help even though a sensible part of me knew no one would come to my help.
"Xav-via!"
"P-p-please!"
"St-o-p"
I tried turning my head to get a view of his face, to look at the face of the beast I was married to
"non voltarti, non voglio guardare quella faccia"
(don't turn around, I don't want to look at that face) his hand roughly shoved my head back into the pillow before he wrapped his fingers round my neck holding me in place as he continued assaulting my body with each thrust.
Xaviar's words were like a slap to my face, a Jab to my side. My husband didn't even have the courtesy to look at my face during this intimate moment.
My pleas and cries where now nothing more than muffels as I lay there unmoving allowing him have his way. I felt repulsed at myself, at my situation, at the fact that I stupidly chose to stay in a toxic environment like this.
A little while later he was done with me, getting off my body, he untied my hands and went to the bathroom. I on the other hand stayed in place unmoving as fresh tears poured out my eyes soaking the already wet pillow.
I felt violated,
I felt like a whore.
atleast whores gave consent to sex.
Who was I kidding?
I wasn't a strong female, I was just a weak, ugly rejected house wife.
That thought was the only thing that swarm in my mind as I maintained my position.
I heard the bathroom door being closed and soon after it was followed by the sound of the bedroom door also being shut. The silence indicating that Xaviar had exited the scene of the crime.
He was done using his ragged doll so he tossed her aside and went away.