It was a while before Drake spoke up interrupting the quiet moment that I was enjoying.
"You never really did tell me why you hate the rain."
I lifted my head a little resting my chin on his chest looking at him as he looked at me.
I looked away putting my head back down in the position it was in before.
"It's a long story."
A really long and emotional one.
"We've got the time."
He was right but...
"Its personal."
Drake rested his head back looking at the ceiling sighing just a bit.
"If I tell you something personal will you tell me your personal thing?"
Crap he's good.
I want to know more about him but at the same time I don't want to say my thing. Its too soon. I don't know if I can.
"Maybe."
He sighed again this time making it noticeable for me.
"Guess all I can do is try, huh?"
Feeling his chest move against me was extremely comforting and hearing his deep voice resonate through it was heaven.
Now I really wanted to hear his story.
"You know I'm an orphan, right?"
"Mhm."
"It's cause I lost my family to a fire."
I got up and looked at him pain rushing to me as I stared at his blank face.
"Both my parents and little brother."
"You had a brother?"
"Yep. He was six when he died. And the fire started out of nowhere."
He stopped for a second.
"I'm pretty sure it was my fault. Both for the fire and their deaths."
His fault...
I can understand that feeling.
"The fire started pretty big like something that was a fuel caught and exploded or something. My parents stayed in trying to find me and refused to leave the house without me in safety. My little brother though went out with the firefighter that first got to them only to run back in wanting to get this toy I gave him for his birthday. Another burst came and the other firefighters thought it to be a suicide mission to jump in. Everyone inside died. And they died looking for me. I wasn't even there. And that's not it."
"Drake..."
"I probably started it. Afterwards they investigated the house and said the sources of the fire starting were in the basement. That's where I kept all of my drugs and lighters and whatnot. Pretty stupid, right?"
He forced out a little laugh before continueing.
"To even get into them in the first place was stupid but to keep them at home was worse. And to think, I was out that night drinking with friends. I'm a complete idiot. There are no words to describe how disgusting I am."
He was clenching his fists so hard his knuckles were pure white. I felt his pain. Some of it anyway. And that made me want that help him all the more.
I saw that he was about to start talking again all took the opportunity to stop him by kissing him. It was short and simple but for him to stop.
"It's okay Drake. Everyone makes mistakes. And yes, some are bigger then others. But I forgive you, even though that might not be enough for you."
He looked like he didn't fully believe me.
"I hate the rain because I did something like that to. A couple people close to me died in a car crash in the rain due to speeding. It was my fault. I kept them from where they needed to be and they died because of that. So, I get it. And, I'm sorry."
Drake sat up and caressed my cheek now his face of nothing but sorrow. He wiped away a tear I didn't even know had fallen.
"How long ago?"
"Not even a year."
He froze before leaning down letting is forehead touch mine.
"I'm sorry. I've had years to cope. It just happened to you. I'm so sorry."
I couldn't speak now. My throat was clogged with the large lump that just formed.
"I love you Samantha. Even with what has happened to you."
This was probably where I would respond with the same thing but I couldn't say that. As much as I cared for him I didn't know if I was that committed to "love". And with the others, it just didn't seem right.
But for now, even if he'd use it against me, I didn't mind saying it this once.
"I-I love you too... in a way."
I kind of whispered the last part to myself but I guess he still heard me.
He laughed a little, his usual smile comming back into play.
"What do you mean by in a way? Wasn't our moment earlier not a sign? Or are you just trying to make me jump you?"
"N-No! I me-mean, I have some strong feelings for you but just not only you. No, that doesn't make sense. There's something for you feeling wise in me but for other people as well, and- ugh."
Embarrassed I buried my face in his chest.
He laughed more making me relax a little but more about the situation. I was still extremely embarrassed though.
"Hey."
I lifted my head to look at him only to get sneaked into a kiss.
"H-Hey! That's not fair!"
"Go on then. Take the kiss back."
I looked over to the side.
"No thanks, I'm good."
He leaned in closer to my face with a smirk on.
"You sure?"
No.
"Yes."
He backed off.
"Too bad. I was going to give you an increase on that return as a sorry gift."
I faced him shocked from his answer.
"A-A what?!"
He stole another kiss, this time deeper than the other one before, his tongue slipping in then out.
"D-Drake-"
Another one.
This time he didn't stop. Instead he supported me more into it softly pushing my head to him as he also slid my waist closer to him.
I didn't fight back of course. If anything I encouraged it climbing onto him sitting back in my old position purposefully pressing a little hard on him on a certain spot.
It was daring move and one I soon regreted.
Again, alone in an empty hotel room. Practically naked. And what do I do? Grind on his cock.
Just great.
But Drake on the other hand liked that from his surprised moan which turned more into a groan as I sat on him feeling his member harden and his hand travel to my upper leg.
His hand was hot and it felt as if he was holding himself back.
In the kiss he sucked in my tongue as much as possible before letting it all go for a breath of air. But too soon he came back in forcefully, pushing me down against the bed, his hand moving up in the process.
My eyes shot open and I froze grabbing his hand before anything else. He stopped and released me from the kiss looking at me. I moved his hand off looking at it and not his eyes.
"S-sorry. I was sending wrong signals."
"It's fine. I wasn't controlling myself completely anyway. I honestly really want you right now."
His words hit me hard making my heart race faster.
He moved to my ear and licked it sending a shiver down my spine that dropped in my stomach before whispering softly, "Don't worry. I'll be gentle."
Flags shot up in my head and I tried getting out from under him.
"Why are you trying to leave?"
"I-I n-need to g-go to the ba-bathroom."
Stop stuttering for God's sake!
He did a sideways grin as he watched me struggle.
"Don't be scared. It'll only hurt this one time."
"W-what?!"
"You're a virgin, right? I'll be careful, I promise."
I really started trying to get out now but Drake grabbed my arms and pinned them down above my head making me look at him.
"Samantha, I love you. Let me please be the one to take your virginity."
Ah, hell no!
"Besides right now seems like the right time for this kind of thing."
I know, that's why I want to leave!
"Samantha, look at me. Give me your consent, please."
I struggled a little more only wanting to get out of this situation all the more.
"Samantha-"
"There's nothing to take!"
We both stopped at my words.
What did I just do? What did I just say?
Now what was I supposed to do? Confess another thing? 'Oh I let some clingy guy who I still love but only broke up with due to a wish my dead brother made take it. Duh!'
As if!
"What do you mean?"
There was so much pain and disappointment in his voice.
Oh crap. Here we go.
"I-I'm not a virgin."
"You're... not?"
"Well, you see-"
"Was it one of them?"
His grip got tighter and I winced at the feeling.
"Was it one of my brothers?!"
"N-no..."
He lossened his hold. There was a bit of silence as he seemed to have thought over it. It didn't take him long to figure it out.
A foul look crossed his face as he did.
"Let me guess, the clingy ex."
I looked over to the side, really embarrassed now.
He laughed a little, his original grin comming back.
"I think I can top that off."