Anderson
"Awwn…is poor Hakeem sad that I'm not here to see him, get over your fucking self, just because Darla worships you for your skill and you got an even hotter lawyer doesn't mean you are shit. The whole world would sadly not revolve around you okay, so stop deceiving yourself with that false delusion. Go down stairs now and get your contracts done with," I brushed his arm and walked into my room before slamming my room door.
I looked into space as I saw his face show something more than just a smirk or bored look…Hurt.
For the first time since we started talking and exchanging words, he looked like he was actually hurt by my words, he took the words literally??
I recalled what I said to him and tried to see if I sounded mean…I did.
"Awwn…is poor Hakeem sad that I'm not here to see him, get over your fucking self, just because Darla worships you for your skill and you got an even hotter lawyer doesn't mean you are shit. The whole world would sadly not revolve around you okay, so stop deceiving yourself with that false delusion. Go down stairs now and get your contracts done with,"
I let the inner asshole take control and used the venom in my voice to speak and it cracked him. He didn't reply like he used to with one of his snide witty comments, he just stood there staring lost and the look of hurt kept flashing through his face while he physically was trying to make sense of everything, I couldn't understand why he was so worked up about it. I might have sounded mean but it was just our regular banters.
"Why am I trying so hard to convince myself?"...
"Why are you acting like you are in some cheesy soap opera and you just fucked up??" A voice broke me out of my thoughts and a frown appeared on my face as I saw Jordan standing there without any flask of whiskey in his hand.
"You did away with the alcohol??" I asked him looking around hopefully he didn't spill any on my floor or sheets because I would use him as a human mop.
"Can't even seem to remember where I saw it last, I must have slept for a bit," He shrugged as he went to bed again.
"Don't freaking touch that bed. Why the fuck did you come downstairs??" I asked folding my hands. "I said, I would let you know when you can come downstairs and your ass just showed up uninvited knowing fully well that Darla doesn't like you here no matter how much of a crush you have on her, we had a deal, you aren't supposed to show up until I say so!!" I yelled at him without knowing.
"Why was I so pissed at myself?"...
"Woah woah woah, okay chill big guy. Whatever energy you carried from what ever happened outside there, keep it outside okay?? Why the hell you gon get pissed over a slight issue like this??" He asked me and I let out a brief but not an apology.
"I don't know…I don't know, you ain't my therapist. Were you able to do it?? You know, clear his memories and all??" I asked him looking towards the closet.
"Yeah, he's good now, just resting I guess. The Process can be very exhausting, you know— oh wait, yeah of course you don't know, if you knew you wouldn't be out her screaming shit at me when I just saved your ass and I don't even get an apology but that's fine, I have never really heard you apologize anyways to anyone so fuck it," He said walking to the mirror. The apology at the tip of my tongue just wasn't working and I just wasn't ready to offer him an apology, maybe much later I would but for how, I was good, I don't think it was my thing to apologize.
He walked to the mirror to adjust his Pajama's top as he checked if the buttons were right put together while I just caught myself looking at him through the mirror wondering why his hair looked rough but yet it didn't look half as good as that of Hakeem. Somehow Hakeem managed to pull off any outfit and hair style. He came to my mind again and there was his face before I walked passed him and I unconsciously banged my head at the door behind me in frustration as to why he kept popping up with that hurt face.
"Why would I ever say something like that to him?!"....
"Okay, I usually won't ask because you would have no business telling me and yku wouldn't even tell me if I asked anyways because you would somehow find a way to disrespect me in the process of me asking what is wrong with you but I'm still going to ask about it because I'm a fucking nice person and I happen to know when someone is going through an emotion turmoil—"
"Shut up…please. You are talking too much and I'm fine, go about your way and please drop him off at the workers lounge or somewhere, he would think he slept off on duty okay?" I asked, snaking my finger through the stress lines that were tense on my face.
"Why was I so worried…fuck," …
"You didn't ask but I would suggest you apologize and kind of explain what you meant by what you said or did, sometimes it's always about miscommunication and do what you like doing, it's a good mood changer instead of staying her in front of me muttering why did you do this or why didn't you say that, it's exhausting watching you do yourself like that okay." He said walking towards me to go out the door as I moved across from him, he went out to check the hallway before going back to the closet.
"You really are smarter when you are sober which makes me wonder why you drink a lot in the first place." I commented as he went to my closet opening my closet.
"Because when I drink, I get to ask myself important questions like why do I drink?? And after that, the reply is probably something I should have thought of when I was sober, so when I'm sober, I know why I should remain sober till I don't have a clear reason to be sober anymore…does that make any sense to you??" He asked me and I nodded, somehow it made sense. Sometimes we don't understand why we do some certain things till they are done and then and only then would the clear reason reveal itself to us and now it's left in our hands to feel stupid or learn.
"Would you at least help me with this man for free advice??" He asked with puppy eyes which I found insultive to puppies.
"Okay, stop that," I snapped and he grinned.
"Worked, didn't it??" He wiggled his brows and I cringed. It would have been cute if someone like Hakeem did it.
"Wait…what.."
"No Jordan, no your grown ass can't pull off anything cute. Don't ever do that again because it's an insult to puppies. Now fix my problem and leave before Darla somehow traces you again because I wouldn't stop her from beating you ass," I said, closing the door leaving the room for him to do what was supposed to do.
"It would have been cute if someone like Hakeem did it…"
What the flipping fuck was wrong with my head. I remembered my ex girlfriend, a supermodel I used to pose for shows like super bowls and the Grammy and occasionally slept with when i was feeling like it once told me.."You really sure you like girls?,"
But that was because I treated Her like shit and not because of any other reason. I didn't really like her presence or her sick perfume that was too floral for my liking or the taste of her cherry lipstick that irritated my tongue whenever I'm forced to kiss those red lips for the camera.
She was noisy and needy, I swear I never thought I would ever be involved with a woman with that kind of quality, desperation?? Or maybe because she was the next rated top model which meant my publicists, especially Barbare, thought it was a good idea for show business, and I was also getting paid some percentage for dating her publicly. Just my presence in her career got her to the front page of TIMES, FORBES and VANITY FAIR. It was an influence of my name in the industry and in return, all our love songs suddenly made more sense to people even though it was cliche shit written by our song writers and some cheesy shit Chris co wrote.
Going downstairs, my heart slowly hoped that I wouldn't meet him on the table because I didn't Think I could take the look he would give me just looking at me. Holding his grey plates might just make me lose it and I was low key scared of saying something stupid again.
It was pleasantly surprising that he wasn't there to see me and I joined the group talking about the social media rules.
"Where's Hakeem??" Darla asked me and I shrugged pointing up the stairs.
As if on cue, he came down the stairs and joined the table. His face was otherly pale and slightly reddish on the sides like he crumbed his face but his eyes were okay.
"Fuck, please tell me I didn't make him cry…"
"Took you long enough…" I commented looking in his direction and he totally ignored my snide remark.
"Sorry I took so long…" he apologized for his long stay without his lawyer making him. He took a seat before he finally looked at him and I smirked looking back at him but all he did was look at me with a bored look and blink before looking away.
"What did that mean?..."
I searched for something else to say, something to make him talk to me.
"I see you style your hair back, better than when you were looking like a wild hedgehog," I smirked at him and this time he didn't really pay any attention to what I was saying. He didn't even look my way, instead his lawyer looked at him and he shrugged before looking back at him.
I realized he wasn't just refusing to talk, he was just blatantly refusing to answer and that actually concerned me. He stared at me for some seconds before throwing his attention to Darla.
"This was a nice process, as much as I would love to stay, I think I would finalize the contract and then leave the rest for Saturday," He said standing up to his feets and Isis followed him and I stood up too. We all shook hands and there was no weird feeling with the handshake, only his hands were stiff and cold and the handshake was short as hell.
"Welcome to The Hallows," Darla said with a smile at him congratulating him and he smiled back but it didn't reach his eyes.
They based their goodbyes and left and the moment the door closed, Darla looked at me pissed.
"What did you fucking do?!!!"