Hakeem
"How do you like it?"...
I turned around folding my arms to face him. I thought the blue light was going to do more of hiding his facial expression but to my surprise, it highlighted it. His face was crafted in a way that showed every emotion going through his eyes, never new LED blue and amber hues went so well. I felt a light flutter in my belle but my heart was temporarily dead and it was going to take a little more than remaking my penthouse living room to tolerate shit from the same person again. I didn't answer him because I didn't think it was all that.
I mean sure, he got the details like the frame position, my exact TV model and the position of my air con. The fridge and everything else were exactly in place. But I wasn't giving it to him, as much as I was the kind of person to seek validation, I also kept a grudge real and right now what I was feeling against him was real as fuck. Everytime he spoke, I heard that tone and I could only hear that tone whenever he spoke, maybe that was the mix. The after effect of being an offspring of the cold war Lord Xerxes. I inherited a hate for being talked about nastily or being disrespected or not being seen as an equal or something less of a dirty person.
"The agreement from the contract was I got to style my quarters the way I wanted, what happened to that?? Or are y'all just going to start editing different parts of the contracts now to suit your taste?" I asked, keeping my hands folded. I spoke in a monotonous voice and with the bored resting bitch face I always have on, he definitely didn't take time to show his disappointment in my reply. His face dropped and so did his shoulders. For someone who was muscular, not gym junkie kind, but well built kind, his shoulders still managed to significantly fall.
"I'm sorry. If you don't like it, we can always remove it and you can style it whichever way pleases you. I just thought that—"
"You just thought that what?? You know me that well or you would know what I would want??" I attacked him literally but taking away the agitation and the venom and just using a monotonous voice all through, it was a perfect combo to make him look mad stupid. He looked at me with an apologetic glance before the hurt flashed in his eyes, that same broken expression that stayed with me the whole day, I was quick to recognize it in him and my stomach fluttered again, I was getting close to doing him as much emotional damage and intense psychological blows as he did to me four days ago.
Damn why did he have to be so hot….
"I'm sorry Hakeem. I didn't mean those things I said in the hallway. That was rude and way out of line and I promise I would be straight up official with you. I overspoke and I might have driven you to the wall too much and for that….I'm..I'm sorry." He apologized and I almost laughed. He looked like he just swallowed the world's most bitter pill as he apologized. For the short time I have known him, he wasn't the kind of person to apologize but seeing that I have this much effect to trample his rules and make him apologize to me gave me a certain high. I wanted to keep it this way, him trying to make it right over and over but I know myself too well and I know humans.
"If you thought I was angry at you for what you said, you are not fully wrong but this…" I pointed between us.
"This is stopping the childish back to back banter and teasing. I think I made you feel too comfortable and you thought that was a chance for you to say whatever the fuck you wanted to say to me. You might be my boss—"
"I'm not your boss and I don't want you to see me as such," He said, quickly moving a little closer to me in an effort to prove his point. The only thing my brain kept asking itself was..
Why are you trying so hard??...
"You are the lead singer of this band and I'm a drummer. That's my purpose here for the next five years and after that whatever happens. You want to know my theory of my life?? If they can do it once, they can do it twice, and if they can do it twice then they can do it as many times that they want to do it and all of this would only be possible if you tolerate it," I said with certainty. And he shook his head.
"I'm not like that. I'm a man of my words and I know what it's like to be taken for granted and I promise you, there's nothing more than me keeping to my words here when I say It wouldn't be me if I go against it," He assured me in a confident voice.
"So you're saying that you could be possessed by something to say it again and only then should I not hold you responsible for it??" I asked him, breaking down each of his words, he paused for a bit before he nodded in affirmation.
"I'm sure even when I'm high, I say things I really want to say and I don't think that's something that would ever come out of my mouth, in fact, it would be the opposite of that…" He trailed off just as his brain registered what he said. I looked at him with a small smile.
There it was again, that foreign human feeling when you didn't understand what you should be doing at the moment but right now, it felt like my heart was melting and it wasn't with an oak stick piercing my chest like I have dreamt multiple times after I thought about suicide but like I laid a plate of butter on a hot pan and watched it comfortably melt on the plate, producing a creamy texture.
He was making me feel things and his effect was comfortable and not destructive. I knew what it was but I wasn't sure what it was exactly supposed to end with.
He cleared his throat with a small smile.
"So uhm…how about we hug it out as bros??" He asked, opening his arms and I immediately recoiled. The only male figure I Have actually hugged while I spent time on this ball of dried out fireball taking in oxygen was my uncle Hathor. He was the only man who came in for us whenever my father went too hard before his family were moved to the top families so they had to move to the United Kingdom and we continued to live the worst life we have ever known.
"Sorry, what??" I asked, looking at him and his face fell again.
"Like hug it out, like put arms around each other and make a patting motion on the—"
"Bro I know what the fuck a hug is, i meant i don't do hugs and I only do it with people I'm comfortable with," I explained and he came closer and I moved away from him and he animatedly came closer.
"Boy, I'mma smack you hard across the face, Yalla!!! Don't touch me," I went out of his reach , going to the other side of the couch putting a distance between us.
"What's so hard about giving hugs, it's a regular gesture, I saw you hug your sister, what's so hard hugging a fellow man like yourself," He said, but they were not the same. My sister didn't make my inside feel like butter and my dick area didn't go hard when they breathed down my neck.
"She's my sister, my blood sister and I'm comfortable with her because I have seen her and been with her all my freaking life. I know her in and out. I don't know you," I pointed out.
"Well everything is a step by step process, you know baby steps and it's just the act of showing we are cool, stop making a bigger deal than it already is, it's just an innocent hug out, and if you make it something more than it is then maybe it might just be what you want it to be," He smirked and I felt a bubbling feeling in me as my trouser started to get tight thinking of our level of proximity that we would be having.
"Are you overthinking it??" He asked me to slowly walk behind the couch towards me, but his legs that could go miles in seconds were having problems feeling planted to the lush rug beneath my feet. I stood up straight putting my hands in front of me , putting a little space between the all too eager man in front of me.
"A hug won't kill you Hakeem," He said my name in a way I have never heard before…
Oh that's a fucking lie, it's this fucking hormones that was all over the place making me feel and hear shit differently.
"A hug is gay!!!" I exclaimed, putting a hand in front of me with a small frown.
"But you are gay," He said confused.
"Yeah and an ostrich is a bird, doesn't change that it doesn't fly Andaar," I said to him as a matter of fact.
"Okay, okay I agree. That makes total sense." He agreed with me stopping his track and I relaxed…damn was he making me act so gullible.
When I relaxed my walls, he grabbed me out of surprise giving me a hug embracing my whole frame and the warmth slipped through my clothes making me feel fuzzy all over until I realized I wasn't even fighting him and I didn't actually feel like pushing him away.
"I like the day you say my name…say it again.." He said into my eyes. His deep voice caressing my ears causing tingles and I just knew I was done for.
"Andaar…get off me n—"
"Guys…what's happening??"