I awoke drenched wet and panting profusely. I found myself staring at the ceiling for no apparent reason a few moments later.
Two children playing in the playground happily and their faces are familiar to me. The child who was tan was quiet and seems have her world while the other child was naughty. Then shifted to where mom brought me into a big company.
It was just a dream but I felt a strange feeling that it happens in reality. This kind of dream was so odd because the moment I woke up the next morning, I can't recall what I dream of or it was not vivid like this.
I slowly got off the bed and stood up to go near my closet. I need to change my clothes so that the sweat does not dry out my back. The last thing I don't want to happen was t get sick. I need to be healthy because I have many school requirements to accomplish.
I glanced at the clock on the study table and it was three in the morning. I can't get back to sleep because my body energy is wide awake. My mind was also occupied with my dream. Maybe I was too stressed and keep on dreaming weird scenes.
I moved downstairs and went to the kitchen to drink water. No one s was still awake so I went back to my room.
I brought out my lecture notes and books to do the advanced study when I suddenly notice that there was paper missing. I searched my whole bag and took out all the contents but I could find nothing. In my drawer as well as on the bed but nothing. I spent my time nothing to be found.
I gave up and sat on the mattress.
I'm confused by the amount of thinking as well as the draft and survey questionnaire of the thesis we will be grouping added. It was missing in action. I don't know where I put it as much as I still don't have the soft copy of it. What kind of leader I am! I'm very irresponsible.
What kind of life do I have?
This is so frustrating.
I'm at a loss for words.
When it's five o'clock in the morning, I started to do my routine before going to school.
I intended to go to school early to search for the missing paper. I inquired Amber if she saw it but to my dismay, according to her, I left with her without holding anything except my bag when we attend our afternoon classes. I also informed Skyline about it and begged for the soft copy.
I went to my locker room and I found nothing. I went also to the Talisay to see nothing and the trash can near it was empty. I surrendered and wait for Skyline for the copy. I decided to spend my remaining time before class in the Talisay doing my unfinished projects.
I was drowned out by what I am doing and I didn't notice that someone sat on the vacant space in front of me. To my surprise, it was Asher. He was looking fresh and I can't help but notice every single inch of him. Here we again with the strange feeling inside me.
"Are you angry?" he said out of nowhere that made me frowned. "What I said yesterday!"
"Why would I? I was too sensitive," I answered. The truth is I just can't believe that his truthful words strike me though he didn't intend to offend me in the first place.
I genuinely smiled at him.
"Okay," then he brought out his reading materials in science. I suddenly have the urge to browse and read his reading materials but I hated myself. Instead, I went back to what I was doing until I'm done with it.
"You want to see," without waiting for my response, he faced it and put it in front of me covering some part of the projects I finished.
His handwriting was not good as others but readable and organize. It was cursive and small.
Their lesson familiar with me and I can recall some of the topics in Junior High. I tried to solve the problem in my mind.
"The answer is 20 Newton. Is it correct?" I guess so. He smiled and got the reading materials and started showing the equation and I got it correct.
"Why did you choose ABM when you can stand out in STEM?" he looked at me intently and I suddenly felt conscious of the way he stares at me. I'm also getting used to his presence because of how often we meet, unlike before that I'm wishing one day, he would spare one look but there are times when the unseen thrill returns when I face him. "You even got the answer just by looking at it."
He rested his chin on his palms while his head was slightly tilted, making him looked like he was amazed and wanting to see my reaction. I blushed at his gesture.
"I want to get rich," I responded by copying what Amber answered when I once asked her trying to take no note of every inch of his face.
"Huh? I was lost for words. I didn't expect you have a mindset like that," he commented but I laughed turned to grin.
"You didn't even filter your words. Nice motivation."
Just like what I said to Amber, I let out to him the reason why I took ABM. It's not because I have feelings for him but because he was trusty enough to confide.
After a minute of silence, Asher handed to me a paper. Unexpectedly, when I saw what it is, a thorn inside the part of my brain lifted. It was our draft and survey questionnaire of our thesis. I took it but what made me shock the most was the survey questionnaire was already finished filling out. I looked at him and then shifted back to the paper.
Out of nowhere, I made my way to hug him. I was shocked at what I did so with Asher. We both stiffed but loosened after a second. I realized what I did and I felt embarrassed. What should I have done? I abruptly distance myself and my cheeks turn into a crimson red.
"I'm sorry. It was unexpected," I murmured. I shallow hard but my gratitude weigh more and I do not need to worry about how will I convinced our respondents. My burden lifted because of Asher. He's our thesis saviour. "Thank you so much for your help."
He scratched the back of his head and smiled shyly.
I attended my classes happily. I even got perfect all quizzes and received good remarks from our teachers. I didn't mind if I heard others commenting that I did it to show off, suck-up, attention-seeker and all. The important here was I was motivated.
"Andrea," Skyline called me and handed me a USB since we're still waiting for your next teacher "The name folder is Thesis."
"Thank you," and she went back to her seat after accepting the USB.
Amber whispered beside me. "Inspired?"
I shook my head. "You're not good at lying. I saw you this morning having a date in the Talisay."
"It's not a date. It happens that I'm searching for our draft in our thesis. Remember, I misplaced it?" I said but I realized that I defending a thing I didn't do. She smiled at me meaningfully and she's wearing a teasing tone.
"Oh? Defensive, much?" she slightly chuckled. I heave a sighed. She knew me. "How's the progress with your crush?"
I was about to rebut but Sheldon passed by and heard it. He made his way in front and broadcast in the entire class that I have a crush. I saw Sheldon smirked and our classmates began teasing me.
'Sorry,' Amber mouthed and I fake smiled because, at this moment, I expected that this would happen to know who I am. Though I expected, it still hurts. I looked at Sheldon and he was caught off guard not expecting I looked at him looking at me intently. He looked away from my sight and I began asking myself why he did that.
"So, Andrea, from what strand? Is it from ABM?"
"Is it from another strand?"
"ABM section one? Here in our block?"
"From STEM?
"Other strand or lower year?"
And more questions.
Questions can hurt my feelings.
I slowly felt mixed feelings. My happy side turned into a mixture of embarrassment and awkwardness.
"Are you sure it was not unrequited love?"
I suddenly questioned myself because they are negatively questioning me. Is it not okay to have a crush? Is it not okay to admire someone when it was innate to feel this way? Is there any standard or any criteria? Am I not allowed? Why if it is me, all will object? Why others are not forbidden?
Now that I am trying to build my self-confidence is also slowly being torn apart by what those around me are thinking and telling me. Because of what they say, I have no right to feel the slightest thrill even for a second.
"Spill the tea, Andrea. We can create a fan page if you want," Leo said and laughed ridiculously.
"Hey, Leo. Stop," Sheldon came into the scene.
"Huh, relax Sheldon. You are even the one who started the news and you are pissed now. Are you nuts?" Leo claimed in disbelief and tap Sheldon's shoulder.
Silence filled the whole classroom watching the two of them weighing a dark atmosphere. I don't understand what they are implying and after a minute, our next teacher in our next subject went in and stop Leo and Sheldon from fighting.