"Hmmn? Huh? What the?" Aisrin had opened his eyes. He was hanging upside down above a exquisite cafeteria like hall, that was massively destroyed. People were sprawled out all over.
"... That's odd. Why am I upside down... why does it feel so breezy... okay." Aisrin looked up at his entangled ankle. He was hanging by his boxers, stuck on a mana crystal lamp. He pointed his hand towards the lamp, extending his sword to cut the lamp so he'd fall. He caught himself and quickly pulled his boxers up.
"What the hell happened here? Is... is that the king? Why's he sprawled over a maid? Well, he's not naked at least. Where the fuck did my clothes go?" Aisrin looked back up, entirely confused. Until he noticed the balcony just above it.
"I must have fell.... but where are my clothes?" Aisrin muttered.
(Oh finally! You woke up! Let me just start, you are a fucking moron when drunk.)
'Oh, hey. Where's my clothes?'
(With Elvira.)
'Hahaha, I must still be buzzed, i swear you said with Elvira.'
(You heard correct. Want a recount of what happened? I can play it back from my memory vault. You and that king got real chummy.)
'....Please replay.'
Aisrins vision blurred for a moment and then a type of screen took over. He was staring at a party scene. Him and the king were knocking back drinks without care or reason.
"Hahahaha! You can really drink with the best of em!" Deramus told Aisrin.
"Nah, I jus don't want to lose to a Royal!" Aisrin slurred.
'Oh God.'
(Oh, it gets better.)
The girls were also there, drinking heavily, even Blackhawk, drinking without restraint, giving Aisrin a nostalgic feeling. Elvira sat next to her father, drinking modestly.
'How very, ladylike.'
"How did you gain such strength? I gotta know." Deramus addressed Aisrin. Aisrin looked at him, halfway through his next drink. He slammed it down and laughed.
"Watch and be amashed. Shummon Hephaestus!" Aisrin summoned Hephaestus.
'Oh no!'
(Keep watching!)
"Ooh! Who's he?" Deramus questioned him.
"This guy... this guy right here! Is the God of the Forge! Urk! Ahem. He forged this!" Aisrin threw his arm around Hephaestus and then had his sword spring from its ring form.
"He forged that! That's incredible!" Deramus exclaimed.
"This is nothin... He can forge anything a million times better than the Mythril thing!" Aisrin boasted.
'I didn't!'
(Oh, you did.)
"Prove it! By Blodenhiem's Beard!" Deramus exclaimed. Hephaestus finally interjected.
"I can tell you are having fun. Thank you for inviting me, I gladly accept! Bout time you appreciated me! Hahaha! Here, for you, I forged it just now!" Hephaestus laughed and slapped Aisrin on the back. He pulled out a bronze shield and handed it to the King.
He got up and told Elvira to strike the shield with all her might. She protested, but eventually did. It resounded with a loud clang. Not a dent was left in the shield, but the sword had a chip.
"Ohohoho! I hereby decree... Hephaestus as Fargo's Forge God!" Deramus laughed in gleeful excitement.
'I'm so sorry! What have I done?'
(It gets better still.)
'No! Seriously?'
"But how can you summon a god?" Deramus finally asked the question Drunk Aisrin had been waiting for.
"I can summon gods, plural." Drunk Aisrin proudly exclaimed.
"Bullshit! Prove it!" Deramus demanded.
"I must say, I too am curious." Elvira commented. Hephaestus was laughing into his drink.
'Oh, he knew.'
(He knew.)
Drunk Aisrin stood atop a table.
"Look here! Witness my power! Summon!... All but ten!" Aisrin called out with his hand up in a cringy pose, paused and spoke the second line.
(You used all but ten mana to Summon the worst god possible in this scenario.)
'I can't go out in public anymore.'
A large summon circle appeared and a man with unruly red hair and white skin, donning a green outfit very akin to a Vikings, rose from the circle.
"Behold... uh?" Drunk Aisrin looked at the dude in confusion.
"It's Loki. You, sir, aren't very good at announcements, I do prefer to be announced with more a Flare, but, I'll excuse it this time seeing as you... have lower capabilities at the moment." Loki helped Drunk Aisrin out with a few dramatic sighs inserted in his sentences.
'Loki?'
(Norse god of Trickery.)
'Oh that's lovely.'
"I see you are... in a festive mood." Loki discerned after one glance, continuing his one sided conversation.
"Whos Loki?" Deramus asked his daughter.
"Loki! My good friend! Perhaps you should sit, and have a drink?" Hephaestus seemed nervous.
'Oh, he knew.'
(He knew indeed.)
"Hephaestus, how's the forge? I'd ask about the missus... but, well, we all know." Loki greeted Hephaestus. Hephaestus glared at Loki and then at Aisrin.
'What'd I do?'
(Best to just watch.)
"So, Aisrin was it? How about a contract?" Loki sat down and grabbed Drunk Aisrins glass, cut his palm and drained regular red blood into the cup. Drunk Aisrin used the ring sword to do the same.
'Oh my God, I'm a fucking moron.'
(I did tell you.)
The circle appeared under the glass and Loki drank the contents, a smile on his face. Drunk Aisrin took it and knocked it back. Then collapsed and writhed in pain.
"Ah, yeah. Divinity. Such a joy to watch. Deramus? Ah, yes, so the thing about summoning gods, is that there's after effects... And one of them, is this lovely scene here. The other is a medium. Do you know what a medium entails?" Loki began explaining to Deramus and glanced over at Elvira multiple times as if hinting.
'Oh that prick!'
(Honestly, I'd say you were the prick. You wanted to show off, and it's coming around to nip you in the ass.)
"I have no idea." Deramus was swaying slightly, his face entirely flushed. Loki leaned in and began whispering in Deramus' ear. Aisrin couldn't hear it so he walked closer, but still hear nothing. The whispering lasted several minutes before Loki leaned away. Deramus' expression was blank, and then he began laughing.
"Of course! Hahaha! It is a gods request after all! Elvira, I leave Aisrin in your care. Drink, drink! Hehehe!" Deramus stumbled away. Loki smiled as Elvira picked the agonized Aisrin up and left the hall. Loki grabbed a glass and lifted it up.
"A pleasure... And may you be pleasured!" Loki laughed as he downed the drink and vanished. Hephaestus only shook his head but continued drinking. The scene ended there and moved up to were Elvira and Aisrin were.
'Nope! I already know! I'm good! I don't need to see it!'
(Are you sure? You two were animalistic. I mean purely primal.)
Aisrin watched as his hair changed from red to dark purple. His skin darkened and his eyes went from a gold to a deep crimson. He even had elongated and sharpened canines, though not vampyre significant. For a second, it seemed as if a mirage of wings flashed on his back, but after looking again, they were gone.
Aisrin dismissed the scene before the deed began.
"That damn Loki. He set that up!" Aisrin kicked a chair.
(You should go get your clothes, you should know now.)
Aisrin sighed and walked out of the hall and up some stairs and followed the hall until he found an opened door and walked in. His clothes were sprawled over the floor, along with Elviras. He quickly gathered it up and threw them on. He glanced at Elvira. He admired her naked body. He noted the modest size of her breasts, how soft and ample they looked. He obviously left more traces once again, love bites and hickies all over her breasts.
'Is it possible to be jealous of yourself? And I must really like tits.'
(Only you? I think all men do, Aisrin.)
Aisrin stared a little longer, burning the image in his mind before dipping out. Where he was headed, the guild. He needed a job.