I believed that I would follow the path my parents intended for me. Yes, at the beginning. According to my parents, going to school, getting a diploma, finding a job, getting married, having children, and living like that until the end of your life, was what can a life lived "thoroughly" should be described. Of course, when I say profession, I mean the medical sector, law, or politics; boring. I lived according to this plan of my life, thinking it was the right thing to do. I said nothing. I followed.
It was all at the very beginning, of course. I realized that this life that my parents called ideal was not for me at all. The reason for this change of opinion is simple. It was from the start of college that I started to learn a lot. I learned the hardness of life. A/N (Cliché)
Imagine that when I was in 6th grade a rumor began to circulate, people started to avoid me. They talked about me behind my back, my best friend, she was my childhood friend also had to stop herself from being with me... * sigh * I was pointed at, ignored, I was isolated from everyone, still not knowing what I had done wrong.
End of vacation, new school year, new year.
I didn't want to start school again. The idea that people will ignore me scared me, so I joined both hands and wished that nobody would snub me. If I'd have been taught to pay attention to what I wished, I would have thought a bit better before making that stupid wish.
My wish was granted.
They no longer ignored. I would have preferred the opposite.
Every day I came home with new injuries, I was bitten up again and again, relentlessly. I had become their punching bag, a toy they could manipulate, insult. I was nothing to them. It was the same in 8th grade. I went through all of this without knowing the why and the how of my situation.
I was crying, begging over and over to be left alone! After a year (7th grade) of being beaten up, I stopped insisting. I started to close in on myself. I no longer showed any emotion, putting on a blank face at school. How did my parents never notice my injuries? Well, it's simple ... I don't have parents ... Nah, just kidding, think about it, I mentioned them at the very beginning, you see.
Joke aside, what I said was not wrong. When I started my second year in middle school, my parents separated. Since I didn't talk to my father anymore, it didn't change much because I never felt like I had a father anyway. My mother was tired all the time when she got out of work, at wit's end, raising four kids alone is not easy for anyone.
I was facing everyone with no one by my side, but I made sure to hide it all from my mother. She already had enough problems with my two little brothers and my little sister. Yes, I am the oldest more pressure on my shoulders, haha.