My hand kept reaching for the nape of my neck scratching it roughly, it itches and burns but I had to scratch it. I was getting my homework done in the kitchen...barely, while my mom was making spaghetti for tonight. It was so hard to concentrate over the itch. It had been going on for two days now, but I haven't told her yet. I put my pen between my lips and use my right hand for better advantage. It felt like fire was running under my skin and not blood, it pains really bad.
I groaned hard and put my head down still scratching "This is so annoying!" I whined before looking back up meeting with my mom's soft smile and arched brow.
"I thought you loved algebra" she said with a chuckle wiping her hands clean with a kitchen clothe.
"Yeah mom but I don't like rashes" I said with my pen in my mouth still scratching my neck, I was quite sure the skin must be coming off by now.
"Let me check on it" she said quickly coming to my side. I put my hand down fighting the urge to put it back on. She went completely behind me pushing my head down lightly. I felt her fingers move away my hair slowly for a clear view,
she better be fast because I don't think I can keep my hand away for long
She gasped sharply and her fingers were off me.
"It must be infected right? Is it that bad?" I asked before placing my hand back on it, it felt like fireflies were dancing on it. I quickly took it away, I guess no more scratching. My answer never came, did she walk out on me or move away because she didn't want to touch it. She's a doctor after all and have seen much more gross things. I looked behind me and she was standing there with both hands over her mouth, her eyes wide tears trailing down her cheeks. I jumped out of my chair equally getting scared. Was it bigger than I expected.
"Mom, what's wrong?" I asked taking steps closer to her. She immediately backed away putting one of her hands over her forehead and look down to her feet. She started pacing and mumbling stuffs to herself.
"Mom you are scaring me" I choked out tears starting to wet my face, was I dying or something. It always starts with a rash. My body started to tremble and my heart was throbbing.
"How can this be?!" she said brushing her hair roughly. I couldn't take the suspense any longer I cut her off her pace and grabbed her shoulders
"MOM!" I yelled in an attempt to snap her out of it, my neck was throbbing and itching and my mother was making a big deal out of it.
"It's too soon, it can't happen now" she said to me her eyes filled with tears
"What's happening? What are you talking about?!" she didn't bother to answer my question but pulled away from my grip. She can't be seriously doing that right now, she was sober. She went over to the phone and started shuffling through the phone book fast. I had never seen her used the old phone hanging on the wall before.
"We have to call my grandmother" she said still shuffling through the book.
"It's just a rash, we don't have to call for backup not especially Nan for it...." wait! she said my grandmother. "You said your grandmother? Did you just say your grandmother?" I just started feeling uneasier by the look in her eyes
"which means-"
"Yes your great grandmother!" she said turning back to face me with a long flushed face. What's she talking about? I don't think she took the right pills tonight, i took some time to process what she just said because i never knew i had a living great grandmother that nobody ever mentions
"You told me you had no one in your family that's left, the last of them was your mother and she died while I was just a child. I saw the funeral Mom, right?" I asked not even sure of what I was saying myself, I was confused now but I was clearly not taking her first choice of words to mind. It doesn't make sense all of a sudden she's acting like she had family.
"How do you know that? What else do you remember?" She sounded even more crazier. I know I saw the funeral, I could clearly remember it now. Seeing her like that asking with such fear made me think otherwise, was I imagining it?
"It happened Mom! You and dad were all there"
"We have to stop this" She said placing a hand over her mouth as she continued crying.
"Mom," The look in my eyes demanded the truth, I was chaotic inside
"There was never a funeral for my mother!" she said shaking her head before falling to her knees. I rushed and engulfed her in a hug, my head was starting to throb badly as everything doesn't make sense. I knew my mom could be delusional sometimes but it never happened this time; it felt like she was indeed in her right senses.
Forget my neck everywhere in my body now was starting to ache. It doesn't make sense, I could remember when it happened. I saw her in the hospital before she passed, I saw the casket too.
"Baby I've tried my best, I've tried everything there is to keep you away from all this but I failed....again" she said tightening her grip on my arm. It felt like her nails were starting to dig deep inside my skin. She pushed her head off my chest and looked straight into my face.
"It's time to go" she said her lower lip quivering.
"It's time to go? to go where?!" my voice shook
"Shallow falls"
*****
After the dinner with Mom my neck felt even worse. How could she say my grandmother and her grandmother which In turn was my great grandma aren't dead? Mom pulled herself together after a while and we returned to dinner, it made me think maybe she had developed some kind of mental illness.
She asked me not to scratch my neck again, she rubbed something transparent out of a bottle on it and put a plaster over it. I didn't have much appetite for spaghetti, the thought of how gross my rash could be made me full. She gave me a vile lilac liquid, it tasted so gross but I had to swallow. She sent me right to bed and I wasn't even done with my assignment before she went on the phone. I am currently in my bed leaning against the headboard. Nothing was making sense now, I shouldn't have let her check it out.
I just wish you were here right now!
I thought fisting the gem on my necklace. Dad would have straightened everything out. Shallow falls or whatever the heck it is, I looked it up but nothing popped up which still makes me doubt if mom hasn't started a new medication. She made the whole place up, it doesn't exist. I shouldn't worry because I cannot even go to it.
My dog pushed on the door opening it wide. He jumped on my lap and started licking my face. I smiled and gave him scratches. He was loving it sticking his tongue out and panting. He rolled to my side and laid down quietly. What a crazy night this was. I placed my hand over the plaster, it was starting to sting like being pricked with a needle. I had to see it for myself, I jumped out of bed and grabbed my phone off the bedside slowly shutting my door and stood against it. I put my hair in a rough bun then rested my head against the door, before I slowly peel the plaster off. I bit my lower lip in pain, somehow what she rubbed on it was making it a lot worse. I had my phone in front camera gripped in my right hand. I positioned it right to the back of my neck and took a photo, I had to try three times before I touched on the button. I saw the flash casting a shadow of some part of me before it clicked. I quickly took the phone to meet with my view.
"Ohh!"
I texted the photo to Christine immediately after I took it in. She hasn't replied yet but she must be asleep already. Max was also snoring beside me, I brushed through his fur gently before I laid on my side. I switched off my lamp, my room getting bathed in moonlight. It was so hard not to think of what's on my neck or scratch it and what mom blabbed about earlier. I kept brushing his fur until the darkness consumed me.
I woke up in the morning with a sore neck, I touched over the bandage I replaced last night. It was paining a bit less. I was so surprised not that it was suddenly getting better but my alarm clock didn't even go off. It was already 5:35am, I threw my legs off my bed and was about to get up when my phone "ding"
I took it off my bedside and it was a massage from Cristine, why was she up early today?! Anyways I quickly opened the message
"Eww!! What's this?!"
She cannot be serious, it doesn't even look that bad
"That's somehow my neck!" I texted back
"You've got a tattoo done without telling me..... you're bad and it kinda looks infected. You've got to tell your mom"
If Christine was anywhere near me right now I could have hit her. First I would never get a tattoo as long as I live with my mom and she knows I would never do anything as drastic as a tattoo without her's or mom's knowledge. I frowned and texted back
"You think I don't see that! And it's not a tattoo. It's a freaking rash that turned into that!!"
"You might need surgery!"
Why can't she just say it's going to be ok like every normal friend does. I rolled my eyes before I continued texting.
"Will get it fixed but forget that....
Y are u up early today?!"
"IDk... I actually responded to my alarm today"
Wow, Chris waking up to an alarm happens like once in every million years which was never.
"Maybe the aliens attacked....lol"
"Meet u at school I've got juicy stuff to share....wink wink"
Oh no! I better come up with an idea to get out of this one alive.
"Keep it clean"
"We'll see!!"
I smiled and was about to put my phone down when I saw my gallery app. I tapped on it and then on the picture I took last night. I stared down on it squinting my eyes only to see the pattern in light ink. It was very faded barely noticeable that you can't actually see it over my irritated, red skin.
what was that?
I may have scratched it a teensy bit because it looked really infected. With all that red patch and slight scratch lines made it look worse. I turned my phone upside down after I thought I caught on something. I brought it closer to my face and I squint my eyes even tighter, I saw a kind of circle with another circle inside, cut into segments but I couldn't see exactly what was drawn in each of them. I jumped off my bed when I realized time says 5:55, I must have got drowned in seeing the faded pattern.
Maybe it was from excessive scratching.
I looked over my shoulder and Max wasn't there anymore, I guess he had to go. I jerked my door opened stretching out all my strained muscles, I felt like I've been in a basement fight club. I went inside the bathroom after couple of more stretches. I looked in the mirror and my skin was oddly pale, maybe I needed a tan. I turned on the shower and jumped inside after stripping my pajamas off and also the bandage. I let the water dance on my delicate neck skin sending dull pain spread all over. It was actually kind of refreshing, I closed my eyes and let myself enjoy it. I quickly remembered that I had school so I grabbed my fruity shampoo and squeeze a generous amount in my palm before I rubbed it into my wet hair. The fruity goodness filled my senses, I just love it. It maybe safe to say I tasted it once or twice, maybe.
I finished up shower pretty fast and three minutes later I was combing through my hair. I got dressed casually, jeans and a blouse. I threw my back pack on and ran down stairs. I was instantly hit by pancake goodness. My tastes buds started to party even before I got to the kitchen. I dropped my backpack in one of the chairs and stood by the kitchen counter.
"Good morning" I said to the her with a smile. She didn't even look up or smile back but kept flipping her pancakes. She's made more than enough already why bother making more.
"Hmm.... It smells amazing mom" I said again trying to start a normal mother-daughter conversation about her cooking but she seemed not interested. I didn't want us getting over what happened last night because I wasn't going to engage in it too. She looked up at me with a straight line smile that only lasted a second. She made me a plate and handed it to me.
"Have your breakfast Gia" she said before going back to her pancakes. I took the plate and head back to the table. I poured myself a glass of orange juice and squeezed on maple syrup over my pancakes.
"Yeah! Better not get late for school" I said in a low voice. So much for starting a nice conversation with my mother in the morning.
"Sorry but you're not going to school today or anytime soon"