Chapter 4 - New Memories

It's been like… I'd say something like 1 hour at best. It was like being conscious while sleeping, something akin to sleep paralysis.

Suddenly I started to feel like there was something merging with me, they were feelings that I really disliked.

Fear, Anger, Disgust, Sadness, and Loneliness.

These emotions were so intense that my sanity would've been affected by them if it wasn't because I've gone through some rough times on my own.

After calming down for a moment, I suddenly started to remember things, although they weren't my memories, they didn't feel foreign, it was like I always had them.

'This kid… ' If I could, I might've thrown up by now.

His name… No. My name is Shiro Takeshi, I have snow-white hair and my eyes were bright yellow.

Ever since I can remember I wanted to become a hero, being the No.1 was my aim, Dad always told me that I should try my best at everything, he gave me unconditional support. While Mom did the same, she always made sure that I didn't push myself too much. I was happy, I really was.

Things changed when I reached 4y of age… I turned out to be quirkless, I remember the look of concern of my Dad and my Mom who secretly seemed relieved but concerned nonetheless. Their encouragement still came, but somehow it didn't feel the same as before.

Other kids avoided me like the plague, I was somehow lonely despite being surrounded by people... That is until I met him, Yami who had a chainsaw quirk, it let him summon chainsaws out of his body.

He was quite simple, sometimes he came as brute even. But he was someone who didn't avoid me.

He said something so simple that someone else may even pass it as a joke, but for me… for someone whose world collapsed because of not having a quirk, it felt like a ray of hope.

"You don't have a quirk?"

"...yes..."

"Oh! So that means that you have to work harder than everyone else! But I'm not gonna let you be No.1 because if you work hard, then I will work harder than you!!!" He said with a blinding smile.

Someone who didn't mock me nor give me some words of pity, he didn't avoid me, he would drag me with him to run and play. I would always push myself just to meet his expectations. I made a promise to myself because of him.

'I WILL BECOME STRONG!!!'

And made a promise with Yami too, someone who considered me his rival as only I was able to keep up with him and his antics.

"Let's see who becomes No.1 hero first"

It was quite childish really, but I was happy.

But something happened when I turned just 5 years old. Yami took me to an orphanage as he had a friend there. The orphanage wasn't anything special, it was in a rural area.

And as if the cruel reality laughed at my face. The orphanage was attacked by mysterious people, and many small kids were kidnaped. Yami and I wanted to fight but we were restrained quickly, I remember being knocked out and waking up before being knocked out again. Yami, who was in front of me, was going through the same.

We were in some sort of trailer, so I knew we were being taken somewhere, but that's all. Somewhere along the way I and Yami were separated, I couldn't help but freak out.

'WHERE IS MY FRIEND!!!' I wanted to scream, but all the kids were silenced with restraints.

I got knocked out again, but this time when I woke up, all the kids including me were in the center of some sort of arena. There were seats behind the fences, although they were empty, there were cameras all over. The floor was reddish-black sand, it had nails and teeth mixed in. I wanted to throw up but I still had a restrain on my mouth.

*CLAP CLAP*

A man in a business suit and a black skull mask called for our attention.

"Welcome to our arena! From now on you will be fighting for some of our customers, so please try to put on a good show~! Now. There are only so many participants that we can maintain in this facility. So we are gonna be putting you through "La Cosecha" so now… chop! chop!" He said everything as if he was in daycare. Just by his tone, you could say that he was having fun.

I got shivers all over my body, my instincts started to warn me about how cruel the man in front of me was.

Then the man left the arena, all doors and exits closed. Claps and cheers resounded all around the arena as if this was a sort of game. Suddenly all of our restraints came off, we were all confused, all kids were scared including me. Counting me we were around 25 kids, none of us could be older than 9y old.

A voice came to my head, it must've been a quirk. I could see that everyone around me reacted to the voice.

"Now now kids~ when the bell rings, you must kill each other. Got it!?" Everyone flinched at the end of the sentence. We might be young but we all knew what kind of act is to kill.

*Ding*

When the bell rang nobody moved, nothing happened yet I got chills for some apparent reason.

"~I can see that nobody is doing anything~," said the voice in a playful tone. Out of nowhere, metallic arms came from the entrance and grabbed a kid that was the closest to it, then he was dragged away while screaming.

His screams became worse a few seconds later, he screamed in a way that could only come out of you if you had your skin peeled off of you. The screams stopped in a minute.

"~If you don't start you may be the next one~"

Under that threat, other's reasoning crumbled, one girl tackled another one, from then on it started a chain reaction. But I had yet to take action.

I just stood there, shivering in my place.

'I want to become a hero… not a-' but my thoughts were interrupted by a kid who tried to kick me.

My instincts came in and made me jump out of the way. In a fight or flight situation, my instincts told me to fight, so I did, even if I was doing it mindlessly. When I came to my senses I had blood on my hands…

"Oh my! You didn't kill any of the participants..." said the voice in an amused tone. But then it continued.

"No worries~ it was your first time, we will take care of the rest!" Suddenly the bodies of the other "participants" were dragged out by the metallic arms. I threw up, the feeling of being close to death wasn't nice and knowing that other people in front of you will die in a few seconds made it worse, the blood on my hands and the smell of it didn't help. The others went through the same, while we were suffering, cheers and claps played in just like in the start, those sounds just made me feel like I was dying from the inside.

There were just 5 participants left, I was the youngest one. Then the voice told us that we could go, all entrances were opened, but when we walked out we were hit by some type of paralyzing quirk and we were taken separately to our rooms, which were actually cells.

After a day of rest, I was paralyzed again, then taken to the arena to fight. I didn't want to hurt anyone but my instincts would always kick in the last moments...

[1 year later]

I discovered something quite obvious after being stuck in this hell hole, all participants are quirkless… we are used as fighting dogs… just.because.WE.ARE.QUIRKLESS!!!

The rage I felt wasn't something that could be described with words.

I've had many fights until then, almost every 2 days, but I never felt accomplished by surviving. I kept feeling worse and worse despite being treated as a VIP as my appearance was unique, and I was the youngest of the participants. They treated me "good" apparently.

I kept feeling worse, but it would be more accurate to say that I stopped feeling things. My emotions became dull.

'Wouldn't it be amusing seeing a Chihuahua take down a Doberman?' Or 'I want to see an underdog!' That's all that went through the heads of the bastards who paid to watch me fight. They made me fight even when I was injured as it was more entertaining.

For the first time, I was taken to a "Special" event, it was an obstacle course. Of course, it wasn't a normal one, it had chainsaws coming out of the ground, pits filled with needles, a parkour course where you get shot if you step on the wrong place, water filled with piranhas, a spot filled with climbing ropes that would fall after an unknown amount of time after being touched, and many other types of traps.

I ended up first...

The instincts that kept me alive up to this point have been well refined up until now. At this point it was just my instincts that made me move, I simply didn't know if I had the will to live anymore. I turned back to see the other participants, they all had despair in their faces…since if they lost they would obviously die.

I realized that I couldn't even feel bad for them, they all were new faces to me… again. There have been many participants replaced.

The few that survived with me in the first "Cosecha" only lasted 1 month.

[Another year later]

I was dragged into another special event, they just called it the "Hunt". They called it their new event for "El Hoyo". They would let us out in the forest outside of the facility for this event.

That was the first time I heard the name of the facility that I've been at all this time.

The event was simple, some customers came to hunt us, we had to run with a tracker that tells our general location. It was the sort of game where you pay for something but you have to go and get it.

The event was made because this season had some good participants, and aside from them, there was me. I have become their hot topic when it comes to El Hoyo as it's the first time someone survived more than 1 year, many customers wanted me as a pet because of my appearance.

While I was running away I felt something for the first time in months. I didn't know what it was, but somehow I could tell that it was good. And sure enough, there was an explosion at the facility. My guess was that they were being attacked, so I took my opportunity and went back to the facility running at top speed.

I could run faster than anyone would've thought, someone may mistake me for an animal if they don't take a closer look at me. The customers wanted someone savage-looking, so the mysterious people wouldn't let me get rid of my long hair. So I really looked like an animal.

I stopped holding back my strength, which I started to control when I realized that I was too strong for my opponents. I had to put on a "good show" to survive. I started doing this when I noticed that they had a ventilation tunnel small enough for me to sneak in and found their armory.

I started to investigate more and found the office of the skull mask bastard. At this point I just wanted to survive to kill him, it wasn't something like an obsession, it was more like an 'I have to do it' kind of feeling.

When I entered I saw that the entrance was a mess with fire and debris everywhere, I could hear people fighting. But I didn't pay attention to any of it though, I went running to my cell and directly went to the ventilation tunnel, from there to the armory. I took 3 hand grenades and a few military knives along with protection to wear under my clothes.

'I need the bastard to think of me as a child, so I can't take handguns. That would just make him wary of me.'

I ran to his office, I could sense his presence, he had always acted cocky, so he was probably expecting his subordinates to tell him that everything was alright.

*BAMM!*

I kicked the door open, he was a bit startled but I could see his relief when he saw it was just me with a knife. I screamed and ran towards him with a knife in my right hand, but he just extended his hand and it became a black sort of matter that held me back from getting any closer to him.

"HAHAHA! I didn't think that you had it in you kid" He manipulated the dark matter to get me closer to him, almost face to face, and before he could mock me again.

I kicked him and he obviously noticed the blade under my shoe. He stopped my leg from reaching him with his other hand. But that's what I wanted. He was looking at my leg only and…

*clank*

A metallic sound came from my left hand, it was the ring of the grenade, it was too late for him to take cover. I dropped the bomb and protected my face with my arms and my torso with my other leg.

The grenade exploded in midair.

*KABOOM!!!*

I was sent flying towards the entrance of the office like a cannonball, my body felt numb because of the explosion plus rolling on the ground like a ragdoll. but I stood up for a few seconds.

My ears were ringing and I felt dizzy, there were burns on my arms and legs despite wearing protection, but my torso and face were alright. I looked at the shadow in the smoke and rubble, I still sensed a presence. I didn't hesitate before throwing the other 2 grenades to make sure he would be dead, after all, he might be wearing protection just like me.

*KABOOM!!*

*KABOOM!!*

After a few seconds, I walked towards the center of the room, where he was… His mask has been sent flying away after the first explosion, I could see that he had protection as I thought. But it couldn't take 2 extra grenades at point-blank range.

He was still somehow breathing, his body was burned completely black. I just walked towards him and grabbed the knife that was under my shoe, I looked him in the eye, he was scared of me… I pointed the edge of the military knife on his throat.

*STAB*

...I killed him...

People talk about feeling great about revenge, or say that you don't feel anything. Others may be disgusted and throw up… But for me...

I felt relieved, I didn't feel happy about killing him, not even someone as putrid of a human being like him could make the act of killing feel good. It's just that I felt that I couldn't live nor die if he was still in this world…

*SIGH~*

I relaxed for a moment, but I fainted right after.