Darkness… All Di Xueyan can see is plain darkness. She does not know what is happening but she can feel her heart aching. She can feel resentment. She can feel a bloodlust inside her, trying to occupy her thoughts and heart, trying to manipulate her consciousness.
She is confused because she is clueless as to why she felt those feelings. All she knows is that she is inside a vast darkness that her consciousness calls prison.
It was not until she heard the first sound she heard thus far, a clashing sound of swords. It is as if the place beyond the darkness is a bloody battlefield. The muffled sounds of goodbyes, anguish cries and gentle reminders penetrates her mind, making it hard for her to even breath because of the pain it causes her heart.
And then in the darkness, she heard her inner voice. Calling for revenge…. Calling for destruction. The feeling it brings makes her heart comfortable, as if those are the things she have to do, making her succumb in the embrace of hatred.
But, she hears voices. Voices that makes her wanna sob and curl herself in sadness within the darkness. Voices that wants her to move forward in life…that wants her to smile the way she used to…that wants her to never look back…
' Who are they?', she heard herself asking, feeling confused at the another wave of pain In her heart.
' We never regretted knowing you', a voice echoes in her ears, as if a soft breeze of a summer's night.
And then there's a little light accompanying the voice. She does not know why but she longs for that warmth. She longs for that voice again. She wants it to come back and talk to her again. She feels like the owner of the voice is very dear to her. And so, she reached for that light.
She uses her remaining energy to chase that light, forgetting her earlier resentment.
Whenever she gets closer, the light seems to gently slip away from her. But she never gives up. She doesn't want to give up. She chases it again and again, using all her remaining energy to reach out for the light. She doesn't know why, but she feels a wet feeling in what is supposed to be her face.
' We never regretted knowing you', the voice passed through her ears again before a blinding light gently envelops her body.
Di Xueyan open her eyes, tears are falling as she blinks.
" But, I did", she hoarsely mumbles, not minding the painful feeling of her throat. All the memories of what happened flashed before her mind.
" They are all dead", tears swarm from her eyes, blocking her vision.
"They are all dead", she sobs painfully. She wants to shout. She wants to deny the truth but, when she is about to wipe her tears, she saw black veins in her right hand, an indication that a light qi user like her, used a dark arts. It serves as a reminder. A mocking reminder that the beasts who treated her like their own family, died because of her.
" It is all because of me, If only –', her painful sobbing voice stopped when a melodious voice from who knows where interrupted her self – blaming.
" It is because of you. That is why you need to live the life that they want you to have. The usual life that you lived together with them", Di Xueyan uses a lot of strength to move her head side wards. Through her tears, she saw a silhouette of a woman in red through the cracks that looks like an opening of a cave.
" How can I live it the way I lived together with them, when they are no longer in this world?", she reasoned out in a very hoarse voice, her throat burns painfully but nothing is more painful than the thought of losing your loved ones.
" In this world, one thing is certain…death. Have you seen them hesitating when they fought for your life? No, they never did. Even them, accepted their fate, how can you not do the same?", she said harshly but her voice is as soothing as ever.
Di Xueyan musters all the energy she has to sit up and confront the blurred woman in front of her.
" It is not their fate. If they never met me, they wouldn't have died tragically", she firmly stated with all seriousness. The woman in her side sigh softly and sits beside her. Only then, she can see the most stunning woman that she has ever seen in her life. Her facial expression is very soft as well as her phoenix eyes. Her long pointed nose highlighted her red thin lips as she smiles while tilting her head side wards. What made Di Xueyan gasp in shock is the red little dot in her forehead which is surrounded by green colored flames, the exact same look as her mother's.
" Their fate…. Was to meet you all along", she softly soothes DI Xueyan's hair while looking at her in sympathy.
" Who are you? ", DI Xueyan asks, confused as to how this woman seems to know everything, making the woman smile.
" The real question is… who are you?", the woman answers back, making Di Xueyan feel sour.
' Yes, she is right. Who am I?', Di Xueyan smiles bitterly at how clueless she is. Funny, she never even know who she really is. She never even questions her identity before, but considering that she never did anything but was still hunted down by those powerful creatures, made her questions her whole existence.
DI Xueyan tried to take a water bottle from her storage ring but failed when she can't even summon an ounce of spirit qi. The woman saw her struggle and took a cup from a table in the bedside. Not even minding if there is a poison in the water, Di Xueyan drinks it carelessly.
" What do you know of me?", Di Xueyan asks seriously while looking at the woman's forehead.
" I know you more than you know yourself", the woman answers softly while handling her a bronze mirror, in which she unconsciously accepts. Di Xueyan looks at her -self in the mirror, confused but got shocked when she saw the red dot in her forehead became a little red crown.
" What is happening?", she asks the woman in front of her, in daze.
" Why does this little thing changed?", she looks at the still smiling woman, forgetting about the earlier questions in her head.
" It is the insignia of the phoenix clan…", the woman stares at her forehead in daze. Hearing the name of the phoenix clan, the initial resentment resurfaced again, making her eyes looks malicious and fierce.
' The phoenix clan again. Don't tell me I had this shit when I killed one of their god cultivator?', at the thought of the earlier battle, her heart wrenched in pain and hatred at the same time. She vowed to whoever gods there are that she will never forgive this clan.
" To be exact, it is the insignia of their future leader. If the clan will be seen as a kingdom, you are the crowned princess, dear", the woman looks straight in her eyes as she tries to digest whatever the fuck she just heard right now.
" No way! You are kidding me! Don't tell me the one I killed was their leader, that is why I am crowned as the successor?", she gape incredulously, trying to make sense of her situation right now even though deep inside, she seems to have an answer already. The woman laughs gently t her silly inference, shaking her head at the girl's denial.
" Of course not. It is because of the blood in your veins", she gently voice out the little girl's inner thought.
" But, why now? Why do I have to lead those sadists? Why did I only know now? And, how come I'm the next successor?", she shakily voice out her confusion.
' This can't be! How could I serve those savages that I vowed to destroy?', she asks inwardly even though she knows that even though she will be the leader or not, she will still stick to her vow.
" Why you?", the woman tilted her head side wards, staring at the shaking girl whose fists are clutched tightly in her clothes, the black veins in her right hand stands in contrast with her pale jade skin. It looks very eerie.
" Your mother was once the leader, but ran away. It was not because she was chosen by her father, but because she was chosen by the gods. Every leaders in the phoenix clan are chosen by their almighty deity, thus, they can never walk away from their responsibility since child hood. The chosen successors are called the phoenix's child… blessed with the power of the mighty ancient divine phoenix, the ancestor of all the phoenixes and their only deity ," she patiently stated.
" So? What does it has to do with me?", Di Xueyan stubbornly smirks, trying to stop herself from shaking in rage. Who would have thought that those beasts are of her kind? Her sworn enemies… are her people. The woman helplessly shakes her head at her form.
" Your parents tried to suppress your insignia and blood with your mother's inner force, making you barely detectable. But since the phoenix clan is an ancient clan, they somehow got a wind of your existence. But then, since you used the Purple Flames in your pitiful and weak state, the inner force of your mother subconsciously protects you from being in coma right now. Instead of your own life force, the Purple Flames you just used is your mother's force, else, how can it kill a god that fast, considering your weak cultivation? And since the force inside you was already used up, it explains the insignia on your forehead right now", the woman gently explains while standing up and tidying the cave gracefully.
Di Xueyan lowers her head again, pondering the information she just heard. She does not wants to hold a huge responsibility, what more in a clan that she despise the most. She would rather kill herself than disgust herself by leading those damned beasts.
Her mind is clouded with resentment, sadness, self – blame and pain that she never even bothered questioning herself as to why the woman who is quietly tidying the cave seems to know everything.
" My mother shirk away from the responsibility. There must be a way to escape this now", she lightly mumbles in which was heard by the woman whose back is on her. The woman smiles bitterly.
' Another one', she bitterly muses as a tinge of sadness fills her eyes. The woman turns slowly and stare at the girl who sems to be lost in her own world.
" There is… if you are ready to bear the consequences", she lightly said with a smile.
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A/N: Hi! What do you think of the story so far? If you have any questions or opinions, please never hesitate to comment in the comment box below!
I would very love to hear your opinions!
Enjoy reading!