Chapter 1
Thou I was new at the country, I felt free and secure, no parents around for strict lectures whenever I do something wrong though I really didn't want to make mistakes. I was really happy for getting the sponsorship since visiting a developed country was a dream. My friend Leah didn't make me feel lonely at all,she was always there for me,taking me around the huge city and having the different kinds of food, I really enjoyed. She came from a rich background and she never let me feel low because of how I was.
One day as I was sitting at the garden, I was approached by this guy who didn't look familiar, he was not in my class and I had never met him before. He stood there for a while staring at me not saying anything, it was as if he wanted something, but didn't know how to ask it. I felt as if he wanted to sit but I was the problem so I stood to leave.
"Shashin," he called, I was stunned,how did he know my name? Does he know me? Did Leah, no.it can't be her.
Chapter 2
Maybe it's one of the boys from our class who told him about my name,i thought as I turned to look at him, eager to hear what he wanted to tell me. "I'm Keiley," he said as he brought his right hand forward. Thou I was nervous I also have my right hand for greetings,as there is no harm in greetings.
"Actually I'm new in the school thus u I was asking if you would be interested in showing me around." I stared for a while,was he serious? How could I do that? I'm also new here,and of all the people in the campus why me only? Couldn't he found other..."Hey, what is that you want to ask?" He questioned as if he was reading my mind. Thou anyone could think that way because of how i gazed at him.
"No, there's nothing,you can find me when you have time I'll walk you around." What was really happening to me? How did I just agree? He smiled and appreciated. I hit my head with my hand while leaving, I was such a fool.
I headed directly to our room where I found Leah, thou she noticed how weired I looked I didn't mention anything to her. I thought of avoiding going to the garden not to be seen by the guy Keiley, there was something strange about him which even I didn't understand
Chapter 3.
"Hello," he startled me one day as I was leaving from class," its been a while since I saw you how have you been?"" I'm well thank you,so how did it go?" I asked. I knew he might have been looking for me since that day, and by asking I wanted him to tell me that he found someone else who could take him around ." I'm, can we meet this weekend I would really to talk to you,so please don't refuse me." Oh gosh was this again,meeting,talking on weekend,what was this about? What does he wanna tell me? Is there something I did to him or..." Hey,why do you like going quiet like that,i hope you aren't trying to find an excuse,can we meet from two at the garden we first met?"" Yea,right I'll come there at two." I answered
Why I'm I acting this way with this guy? And what is it he wanted to tell me? I was nervous and again I was anxious, nervous because I became dumb whenever he asks and talks to me and anxious to hear what he wanted to tell me. Maybe he's angry with me since I lied to him about showing him around or maybe he wants to know more about our school,what was it really that he wanted,i couldn't think properly.
So I decided to talk to Leah about it,maybe she could help me. But she was the worst in offering advice, she thought otherwise and her advice wasn't helping at all.
It surprised me on how the weekend reached so quickly,i was sleepless for no reason that Friday night,and I didn't understand why I felt that way,the guy was strange but his thoughts in my mind why?
I was ready that afternoon,i dressed well and was ready to leave, Leah was just observing me,she said nothing,and this made me worried. I wanted to back out from meeting Keiley but Leah pushed me of how the guy would feel with this second lie so I decided to go. Standing some distance from the garden I saw him,waiting for me there, fear cought me,i was scared again but I had to show my courage Infront of him so I went and on seeing me he stepped for.
Chapter 4
"Hello,thanks for coming," he said smiling, " You are welcome," I answered back. " Well,i wanted to tell you something," yea that I know and that's why we are here,why aren't just saying it,". Yes," I said because I was eager to her but again he went quiet,was he nervous? Wow it seems I wasn't the only nervous one,say it say it that's what I was thinking," I've been observing you for a while Shashin and," and what again why was he talking like this,us there any problem or something, thou I wanted him to take time is saying it I was also in a hurry to hear him say it.
I found my self in his car still waiting to hear what he wanted to say and he was taking too much time in saying it that I started getting bored. " Is there any problem or did I do something? What's the problem?" "No,of cause not,there isn't any problem at all," ooh I see, then what's up with him? Did we come here only to stare at each other or something?Why wasn't he saying it. " Actually Shashin,i found out that you are good in maths and I'm poor in it so i wanted to ask you if maybe you would help me, I'd really appreciate it," i thought he was continuing so I waited for more which didn't come. Is that all he wanted to say? Me coming here just for him to say that,w as he serious? Was there even a need for a meeting? He would have just told me that day instead of taking all this time in say it." Ok I will help you then, is there anything else you wanted to tell me?" I wasn't satisfied with his words so I wanted to know, "Thank you very much,yes that's what I wanted to tell you, could we meet in the evenings after classes? He asked with a his beautiful smile," Yea why not," he offered to drive me home with that car and I wondered what the problem was with such rich kids, couldn't his father find him a tutor or lecturer? I was mad actually but I don't know why, I felt bad and unsatisfied at the same time, how could he have taken such a long time only to tell me that?
Chapter 5
I finally reached home and I doubt if I was in my right mind,i didn't Even notice anything Infront of me,not even Leah standing there. I was worried but didn't know why,i felt strange but didn't understand why,what was it with that boy? I've never felt this way at all, I'm restless for no reason at all. And what he wanted to tell me,why didn't he say it,he was scared of saying it but why? I was eager to know. I decided that if teaching him maths will make him do it then I will do that.
The next day after our classes I went to the garden to find him but he was no where to be seen, I didn't even know his friends and I don't know his class how will I meet him? I was about to go when I saw him running towards me,what kept him that long? I was waiting for almost an hour for him.
" Hello,sorry for keeping you,can we start now?" I just nodded my head for reply, in our first day,i noticed that the guy was quite sharp,he understood things so quickly, how was he not able to understand why it is being taught in class? But I assumed people are different, they understand differently, " Ate you ok?" The flashback started, " Yes I'm ok," I asked after noticing him staring at me instead of concentrating on what I was teaching him. It didn't happen once, he did that for sometime till I excused myself to the bathroom thinking something was on my face but there was nothing, " Shashin, shashin," Leah called, " Why are you like this? What are you thinking about for a long time?," She enquired with a worrying face. " No there's nothing,im ok,was just thinking about our today's class," I answered. There was something about Keiley which I thought I should know, I Haven't been with him for long but it seems I already know him well. I have to find out.
Chapter 6
Days went by and our discussions were going quite well. He was getting things and I was also learning somethings from him. We got close that we started sharing about our homes,parents and how life has been with all of us, we could find time and go out and enjoy together, Leah was feeling a little left out but she didn't care as long as I was happy and stress free.
Unfortunately I failed to attend my class and also the discussion for some days,i wanted to go but I was feeling a little unwell. Leah had even refused going to class so that she could take care of me but I insisted.
I woke up and found myself in a hospital room, not knowing when and how I got there,had I became worse that I had to be brought here? I thought it wasn't necessary and decided to ask Leah why she brought me here. Since I was feeling better I was discharged and I headed home with Leah, she was quiet and said nothing the whole time till we reached the house.
"Why did you have to bring me to the hospital,i was getting better wasn't I? I asked, she just stared saying nothing. What was really happening? she was fond of talking what happened to her this time, that I didn't understand. Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Keiley walked in, what a surprise! What was he doing here? I know i hadn't gone to school for a while now but he should have waited a little longer, was I even thinking,he was a friend and that's what friends do so it's ok.
" How are you feeling? He asked me, so he even knew I was sick but how? Has Leah been telling him everything but why? "Yes I'm fine," I answered after a lot of stare.
" Ok I would like to talk to you,if that's ok with you," before I could say anything Leah stood up and left the room. Was this a plan? Why did she leave? I wondered what he wanted to say this time, my heart was beating so fast and loud thought he could here it.
" Ok,you can tell me," I said with a nervous kind of voice.
" Shashin, I want to tell you something and I'm hoping you won't feel bad about it, it's very important that I say this to you, I've been trying to hide it for a while now but, but I feel I should let it out."
He sounded so serious, which made me so nervous, I didn't answer or say anything in the whole conversation, I've never seen him that way too.
"Shashin,"
Chapter 7
"I love you and I'm not going to hide it anymore, I have loved you even before I approached you,since you arrived here I've always liked you, I know you might feel I'm going too far since we are friends but that's how I feel about you,"
He finally said it, that's is what he's been trying to say,i knew there was something but I didn't expect this kind of news, in a way I was excited that he brought it out but again what he said was impossible, he was my friend and that's all I could offer him.
"I'm, I'm glad that you've said it today, but nothing can go on between us, look at me, we are different, there is nothing similar about us except studying in the same school. I can't deny your love but I can't accept it either.
It's not like you are a bad person but, you deserve something better than just me, there are beautiful girls here, who am sure will accept you but I can't accept it," that was my answer.
He became quiet for a while," You are also beautiful and good hearted Shashin,my heart chose you and not the other girls, why do you feel that way or have I done something to you?" "Of cause not you've done nothing nothing at all. All I want is just friendship and nothing more if that's ok with you then we can move on,"
"Ok, as you say,i wouldn't want to loose your friendship so let's continue being friends, I'll have to leave now, hope I see you soon in school,thank you and get better soon.
As he was leaving,i felt some guilt in me, he was a guy any girl would want to have and he's helped me for a while now, but,but I had no choice than to say no to him, things have to be the way they should, only studying brought me here and that's where I should focus my head to and not having relationship.
Immediately he was gone, Leah got in, and this time with a smiling face, " hey, how did everything go? What did talk about?" She seemed anxious to know, " " He confessed his love for me, he wants us to be in a relationship,"
"Wow Shashin, that's good, did you agree?
"No I refused,"
The expression in Leah's face explained how she felt, I knew she wasn't going to be good this time, but why anyways would she take Kelley's side was there something?
Chapter 8
"Listen Shashin, the guy loves you and I've seen it, you also love the guy too and I don't lie to me because I know you already by now. You were just unwell and I'm thankful he came here looking for you else no one knows what would have happened,"
" What do you mean Leah? And why are talking like this?"
" I'm just telling the truth, you had. Collapsed and he found you since I was out, he was the one who took you to hospital and has been asking about you and how you are doing always, isn't that love? And you, you started loosing your concentration, you found yourself calling his name in our conversation, what does that mean Shashin? I'm trying to think better for you, sorry that you might feel I'm going against your wish but that's just the I feel and I'm angry about what you did,"
" Hey, it's not that way, you don't understand, Leah, Leah!" She left while I was still talking to her.
Thus feeling felt like it was killing the inside of me, I've broken two hearts all at once, but how would I even explain it to them, they won't understand me. Keiley was a good person but I had to force myself to forget the feelings I had for him, nothing could go on between us,i remembered how Mercy went through pain, I can't let it repeat itself they just have to understand me and let me be .
Thou I was also hurt I spent the night in tears, I didn't even know when Leah came in, I just saw her sleeping when I woke up.
I got ready to go to school as I couldn't afford to miss another class.
"Morning Shashin,how are you feeling?" She asked, at least I could sense her mood had changed.
"I'm ok Leah thank you," I replied trying to show a fake smile but I knew I was only lying to myself but deep down I was hurt. Leah also prepared herself and we left for school. During those times I was trying my best not to see him, i was trying to avoid it any any way I can and thankfully I think God was on my side for I was always the first one to see him and hide before he could see me. Leah had also been observing what I've been doing but choose to stay quiet as she thought it was not for her to interfere.
Chapter 9
One day Leah decided enough is enough and decided to face me,
"You've been ignoring your feelings for a while now, what's wrong with you? Why are you just letting things go just like that? Are you still leaving by the past? Hey, answer me,"
As she was asking I was there listening like a dumb person, I said nothing I was in my own world, it was a knock on the door that brought my senses back again.
To my surprise it was Keiley on the door, he had come here again, what is it he wanted now?
"Hello!" He greeted
Leah was the one who answered I was just staring,
"Shashin, can I talk to you for a while?"
I nodded and left to go outside.
"Shashin, you've been avoiding me for a while now and I don't know why you are doing this. If I had done something wrong to you then I apologize, you've been moving far from me since we talked the other day, you don't even come for our discussions nowadays, aren't you interested in helping me again?"
His voice showed how sad he was, which made feel the guilt.
"I'm sorry,its just that I have been busy lately and i also wanted you to have some space," I think this I where I said it wrong,
"Space, what space Shashin?"
"I want you to let go of what you told me and have time to notice other people too. There are other girls more beautiful than I am Keiley, I want you to see them and let me go, we are from different worlds don't you see?"
" Are you serious about this? Is it you saying all this? Is it me or you who wanted that space? I love you, and I'm willing to put my love down only to be close to you then why are you doing all this? This is what I will promise you, the more you continue going far from me the more I will try getting closer to you, I didn't ask you for space did I? There is something I see in you that I don't see in the other girls, I don't believe in things like different worlds,what is that anyways? I'm sorry to say this but, I need to continue our discussion and I'll be here every day if you keep doing this, nice time!"
Chapter 10
I've never seen him that way, it seemed like he was angry and begging at the same time. Angry because of that thing called space and begging not to keep away with the distance. I felt bad, so guilty,i made him angry, I promised myself not to do that again thou he left without me saying anything.
The next day, I tried my best to go to our discussion early, didn't want to see him in such away again.
When he arrived,he looked different, at least not mad like he was the previous day. He greeted me in a jovial mood and I was happy seeing that, that was Keiley that I know not the one who was angry.
"I'm, shall we continue from where we last stopped?" I asked,
"Yes of cause, I have a lot to ask since our last discussion, it's been a while now,"
"Yes,but can I ask you something?"
"Feel free to,"
"In our previous discussion, I always feel like it's you who teaches me and not me teaching you, you come up with the question, so I wondered why you need my help most."
" It's because I want to learn and u learn faster and easier with you,"
"Ooh! I see,"
Yes, so shall we continue?"
"Ok!"
Thou I wasn't satisfied with his answer, I had daily thoughts, so I had to believe him, at least I was learning from him also and the discussions were also good.
As time passed, we learned a lot, we had a lot of fun during the weekend. We become so close, something I was trying to avoid. I felt I should tell him how I feel but there was this fear inside me that pushes me from being free with him.
We did a lot of exams and they were positive, we were really killing it, and Leah she was happy for me like a friend should be, always there for me.
He had been asking me to go to his home to visit his family, but my conscience couldn't allow me, so I made excuses for that.
Other students at the campus thought that I and Keiley were dating because of how close we are but, are we really dating? We've been close for a while now but no, we are definitely not dating, we are just friends, close friends, that's the answer i was giving myself and anyone who would us about us.
The unexpected came, what I feared, being away from him, yes I knew we would separate and not be close again, but not this early, a month's holiday, that's a long time, I had decided I wasn't going to spend the holiday at home so I was deciding where to stay for the holiday since everyone school hostels will be closed.A s this was eating my head something was troubling Keiley too, I could tell it from his face.
Chapter 11
Hopefully, Leah decided to host me at their place, thou I was scared since it was a new place she encouraged me that nothing would go wrong with me there.
One day I saw her and Keiley talking at the garden, the conversation between the two seemed serious so I decided not to interfere, maybe I'll ask Leah later if there is any problem, but why would Keiley tell me what was disturbing him? Maybe he found security in Leah. But still I felt something burning inside me, like I was jealous but decided to control myself.
That evening I couldn't relax,i had to ask Leah what Keiley's problem was since I saw the two talking.
"Nothing serious, he was just worried about you,"
"Me, how? Why?"
He was thinking about loosing you then what will happen if it happens that way,"
"Oh, I see,"
"Yea, but he became cool after knowing you are coming with me for holidays, he felt safe."
Why would Keiley feel safe when I go to Leah's home for holidays? Didn't he want me to go home? But why, how does he feel safe about that? That's what I didn't understand.
The day came and I left with Leah to her home. When we reached we were happily welcomed by her parents who seemed sweet by the way they were. Leah belonged to a rich family, but looking at her no one could tell, she didn't like showing off like other students at the compass and this made me to really love her more.
I came to meet her elder brother Ronny after two days. He's also been out of the country for some family business which he takes care off and had now returned. According to how he behaved with Leah I could see how much they loved each other, I felt she was lucky to have such a brother.
He took us out at least to remove the stress from school and it was really fun having him around, he seemed like a really nice guy.
Keiley on the other hand never gave up on his love, he used to come by Leah's gate thou he stayed in a different city so we could meet. We had lots of fun with him too, I really had fallen for him, thou my mouth couldn't utter anything about it. I also knew that he was bringing me closer to hear those three words but I became more hesitant to utter them, maybe a day would come and I would say it without thinking.
Chapter 12
Days went by fast than I could ever expect them to, we were soon going back to school, I guess we had heard enough fun in the holiday. I was sure Keiley would be happy to be back in school since his worry would completely be over and he would be seeing me daily. Actually I wasn't talking about Keiley, I was even hiding it from myself, I felt better that we were returning back to school. I had missed him thou I see him after sometime I missed being with him everyday, I felt I was always missing something when not around him.
I woke up very early that morning, I was a morning riser but Today was different at least we'll be back in school. We got ready and Ronny offered to drive us to school, he was always ready to do anything for his sister.
We were among the first ones so we managed to get the hostel before they were finished. I spent the remaining part of the day looking at the window. Maybe I'll be able to see Keiley, but to my disappointment I didn't see him, maybe he was still home and hasn't reported yet, but life has to go on, what if I don't see him will I die? Of cause not, there's nothing special about him anyway so I should just be cool.
Students were still reporting till the next day and I was only waiting to see Keiley, he had occupied some part in me that made me restless until I see him.
After reporting back to school, classes continued as usual and I was waiting for that discussion group. While I was walking to the discussion area I bumped into Ronny. What was he doing here? Not even a week passed after coming here, anyways, what was my business in that, his sister studies here so maybe he came to see her.
"Hello,"
"Hi, I'm sorry didn't think I'd see you here In school again,"
"Oh right, I came here for some work and I was also thinking of seeing Leah."
"Ooh, that's great, I'm sure she's done with her classes for Today,"
That's great then, I'll just see her,"
"Ok,"
What a nice brother, he really loves his sister a lot. Anyways, I had to go for my discussion and he had to find Leah.
Wow, I felt glad to see Keiley again, but I pretended to act normal, to say the truth, I felt like I went for the discussion to be with him and not to learn again, I began feeling jealous for no reason whenever he was called by other groups of girls to teach them, why didn't they just call me but him?
That day I had to go before the discussion ended since I felt it wasn't me learning but other girls.
Chapter 13
I found Leah listening to music.
"Hi Leah,"
"Hi, how was your Today classes?"
"They were fine,"
"How about your discussion, you came early today,"
"It was fine, I was just tired,"
"Ok."
"And hey, I thought I'd still find Ronny here you people love talking to each other,"
"Ronny?"
"Yea, I met him and he said he was coming to see you,"
"What? No I haven't seen him, how could he came here without meeting me? I'll call him to find out,"
"Maybe he was just in a hurry,"
"I'll call him later on to check,"
"Well, ok."
I was also surprised, he said he was coming to meet Leah so how did he not? Maybe he will still come the day isn't over yet.
When I was about to sleep, I received Keiley's call, and his question was why did I not wait for him so as to finish our discussion, it was kinda disrespectful and it could actually made him worried since I didn't tell him before leaving. I apologized, I shouldn't have left like that.
My morning wasn't perfect, I woke up feeling dizzy, I didn't really understand why but I thought I should try to rest for the day. Leah went to school and left me, after sometime, I had the door knocking, to my surprise it was Ronny, again,
"Good morning!" He greeted,
Good morning too,"
"Is Leah around, I came to see her since I couldn't make it yesterday,"
"No, she's left for her classes,"
"Ooh, I see, but don't you have classes in the morning?"
"I do just that I wasn't feeling well,"
"What's the problem?" He acted surprised than ever,
"Nothing really, I'll be ok,"
"Can I take you to the hospital?"
"Of course not, I will just rest and I'll be fine,"
"Are you sure?"
I nodded.
"Can I stay here with you while I wait for Leah?
"She will come back in the evening so maybe you can come back later,"
"Fine then,"
That fine then seemed so unsatisfied, did he want to stay and wait for Leah till evening? He's a busy man I'm sure he'd be having some work before then, and I needed rest, and I won't rest well while he's here, so he just had to leave.
"I'll tell Leah to call you when she comes back,"
"Ok then, you take care,"
Hhhm, he came to find his sister at a wrong time and was even willing to stay waiting for her, Leah is really lucky.
The next person i knew would be Keiley at the door, so before he comes I should have gotten enough rest not to look the way I do, I would never want him to see me looking weak, he gets worried quickly.
I was woken up by Leah at the door, had I slept that much? But at least I felt better.
Chapter 14
That evening I remained with some questions when Leah refused that she wasn't to meet with his brother that day,
"I told him that I will be having classes from morning till evening and he said he won't make it this evening so why did he come this morning?"
"Maybe he thought he will surprise you before you left for class,"
Maybe, but he's not always like this, he's never comes to my school except when he escorts me, and now there's something, and I'll have to ask him,"
Hhhm, that was Leah, she understands her brother better. The person i was waiting for that day didn't come, the door wasn't knocked like I expected, and it left me wondering whether things are ok with him or not. We'll just have to wait till tomorrow to know that. That night I couldn't sleep, first it was because I slept the whole day, and also Keiley wasn't online, it wasn't his normal thing to be offline, he's always online to talk about unimportant things so what happened today? I thought that I should find him early before my classes.
When tomorrow came, i still couldn't find him, even thou I tried asking to find him I still couldn't get where he was which made me more worried, his phone was off and he wasn't seen in school the whole day. Why is he doing this to me, turning off his phone so that I don't call him, why did he do this? Or did anything happen to him? That I couldn't understand, and I couldn't even concentrate, I found out that he was only seen in the morning in school the previous day, from there no body saw him.
That evening I returned home so stressed, I wasn't thinking of anything but him,
"Shashin, Shashin,"
"Yes," it was Leah,
"Where's your mind Shashin I've been calling you,"
"Oh sorry was just tired,"
"Look at all this brought for me and you,"
There were a lot of wrapped things on the floor, what cought my eyes were the flowers, Keiley, so he failed to show up just to surprise him with this, I will not forgive him.
"Will you not at least read that note Shashin?"
I took the note and read it out loud,
"Dear Shashin, I'm sorry for yesterday, and thank you for being so special to me and your friend there, I wish you all the best as you recover fully, yo..."
"What happened Shashin?"
So it was Ronny, Ronny brought all this things here, but what about my Keiley,
"Shashin,"
"Shashin,"
"Hey, where are you?"
My mind was only thinking about Keiley, and nothing more, I thought this were from him, to console me for not seeing me yesterday, but, but no.
Chapter 15
My heart was in pain, I didn't care about the gifts which were brought. And even talking to Leah did not make me calm,
"Maybe there was some problem at home so he left for home, don't worry I'm sure he will be on soon, and also, he can't miss class for a long time you know him right, he loves studying,"
I could only pretend to be fine after these words but deep down I was not,
"Shashin, you'll get sick again, you know your health isn't good, and I'm sure you wouldn't want Keiley to find you sick, so please stop worrying and get some rest,"
Leah was right, I had to rest, maybe Keiley would be around tomorrow, so I should not worry much. I tried my best to sleep with the thought that I'll see Keiley just the next day.
Again, things weren't as I thought, Keiley did not show up, he didn't come, his phone was still off and no body had seen him, where was he really? Wasn't he thinking about me at all? Didn't he know I would break without him? We have our discussion so why wasn't he here to discuss, where was he?
I decided the best to do is just to keep myself strong, I was ready to go to his home place but Leah refused to have known where he lived, she only knew the town but not the place, so there was no chance of me finding him, and it killed me inside to know that. But days had to move on, life had to go on, and Ronny after knowing what was happening tried to be there at least but It helped with nothing for I didn't even want him around.
I decided not to go to school the next day, Even if I do go then I won't even concentrate so I better just stay home sleeping and try to cool my mind.
There's a door knock, I was bored, what is Ronny coming to do here again? I've heard enough with his visits why can't he just let me relax? I stood up lazily going to open the door, when I did I felt as if my mind wasn't working again, and when I found myself, I could only hug him with tears filled in my eyes, I couldn't prevent it, I was in pain all this while without any knowledge where he was. Why did he leave me like this? Didn't he think it was important for him to tell me? These were the questions I had in my head, planning to ask him but I found myself asking myself again. Still in that hug, I felt my energy loosening, no air enough for me to breathe, and I could hear him calling my name from far and then I didn't here him calling again.
Chapter 16
When I later opened my eyes, Lear
was the only one I saw, she was there looking at me with worry, was I imagining what I had seen at the door? I thought I saw Keiley, or did missing him make me to start seeing him,
"Leah," I called,
"Yes dear, how are you feeling?"
"I only have a slight headache, but I'm feeling better,"
"Thank God, you got us all worried,"
"I'm sorry Leah, but where did Keiley go?"
"Keiley?"
"Yes Keiley," Wasn't Keiley here? Why is Leah asking me like that?
"Oh sorry, he was here, he had followed the school nurse to pick some medicine,"
"Was the school nurse here?"
"Yes, I had to go call her, when I came in, I found Keiley holding you at the door trying to wake you up, so I quickly went to call the nurse, and she advised that you reduce tension or you won't like it,"
At least he came, I thought I had seen my own things, it seemed like half of me wasn't there when he was away, will I be able to take it after we graduate? Because I know that all this relationship will end here, and I'll go back to my country.
As I was still in thoughts, Keiley came in, he didn't say anything, and I also because dumbfounded, so we remained quite till Lear broke the silence,
"What's with you two? Aren't you gonna say anything or I am the problem here? Ok I'll leave, Keiley please talk to her for me, she's quite stubborn,"
"Ok Leah," he answered
That's better he spoke something, I was yearning for his voice, my handsome gift from heaven,
"So how are you feeling?"
I was silent, I remembered i was still angry with him,
"Shashin how are you feeling now?"
"Keiley," I decided to speak out,
"Yes, how are you feeling?"
Where were you all this while?"
"Why do you ask?"
I felt tears get ready to fall from my eyes, is he really asking me that? After knowing how much I care for him, he's still asking me that,
"I just wanted to know because, because you, we always talk when we would miss our discussion right? Don't you, don't you..."
I couldn't avoid those tears from falling, I felt broken again, that's not a question I thought he would ask after all we've been doing together, shouldn't I care about him? Or what did he really mean by that?
"Hey, hey,"
I covered my face with my hands to cover my eyes which couldn't stop tearing, then I felt his hands around me and his head on my shoulder.
Chapter 17
"I'm sorry Shashin, I know, I should have told you where I was and how I've been, please I'm sorry. Will you please stop crying for me, it's killing me seeing you like this, and what if you get sick again, I won't take it believe me, please,"
I took a few breath and whipped my tears, I should say, it felt better letting it all out and him cooling me up,
"Hey,"
I raised my head to look at him,
"Why are you doing this?"
What? Doing what again, what did I just do this time,
"Why are you hurting yourself like this?"
"What do you mean?" I decided ask in confusion,
"Why don't you just agree and let things move the way they should be?"
"What do you really mean?"
"Shashin, I can see how much you care for me, and not just care, it's love, I do love you and I know you love me too,"
"What!"
"Yes, I've only been missing for two days with no details or anything about where I was and look at you, you..."
"Wasn't I supposed to worry about you, we are friends right? And friends worry about each other,"
"Yes I know, but this is more than friendship, and you just have to admit it because I see something coming and I don't want to loose you,"
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is that, you know I'm not just your friend, I hold something in your heart, but you aren't willing to accept it,"
"About something coming, what do you mean?" I ignored what he said first,
"There's this guy who I'm sure likes you but once we are together he wont came between us, please just accept it, and agree with your heart,"
"Keiley, who are..."
Before I could ask, Leah walked in,
"Hey, I just hope you are done because it's getting late," she said showing abit of a smile,
"If cause Leah, we are, thank you for giving us time," that was Keiley,
"You are welcome,"
Keiley then wished us good night and left, he staying outside the school, so he had to go before it's late, but he left me with questions, about the guy who would destroy things between me and him, was it Ronny? But Ronny is just a friend, he only comes here for his sister so why would Keiley even think that? Or maybe there's someone whose threatening him for me, but I knew no one could take my heart from him, he had already stolen it.
But that day I slept peaceful, like a baby, after knowing that he's ok and even seeing him what else was there to worry about? Nothing except for the confession I have to make, of confessing my love for him, which wasn't gonna be easy for me.
Chapter 18
Things were now going quiet well, I had fully recovered and had nothing worrying my mind not even Keiley's words of someone taking me away from him, who could do that?
This was till Ronny now hit my mind clearly, he had been bring a lot of gift for me and Leah lately, his knew behavior even surprised his sister, Ronny has always been busy with work traveling different towns and countries to manage the family's business, so how come now he's doing this? I and Leah agree to call him for dinner one day to talk this out, after food was ready the conversation started, and since he's so used to his sister than I am, Leah started the conversation.
"So, dear brother, how has your business been going, you seem less busy these days than you used to,"
"Yes,everything is going fine, I gave my assistant the work of handling the work for sometime then I'll join him later,"
"Wow, that's nice, and I've noticed you've also been more caring than you used to, so, is there something unto it?"
"Of course not, is it bad showing my love to my little sister and her friend?"
"No, but I just hope that there is no like like things here,"
"What do you mean Leah?"
"I mean you and Shashin,"
"I'm," I decided to intervene with there conversation,
"Leah means that, it's good with all the gifts and such, but I'm hoping there's nothing more into it, hope you won't take me wrongly,"
"Oh no, there's nothing, don't worry, I've heard about Keiley and I respect that so don't worry," he replied,
Wow great, at least he knows about Keiley, I guess Leah told him,
"Thank you,"
"No need to thank me Shashin, it's all ok, and Keiley should be proud having you,"
" Thank you,"
That's how the dinner ended, cool with no disagreement, I myself wished I could tell Keiley that Ronny isn't a threat but how could I when I still hadn't confessed how I felt? I decided to stay quiet maybe he'll come to know himself.
Our discussion continued and each day as we were having them I could see worry in both Keiley's eyes and face, he was a fraud of Ronny who I new wasn't in any case interested in me, and him being worried also made me somehow worried, we weren't that free the way we were and it's only because of this, I decided to let my heart out and tell him the truth, the truth about how I feel and truth about what I know, maybe he'll be happy and keep calm.
Chapter 19
"Keiley, can we have lunch tomorrow, I need to tell you something," I said,
"Tomorrow, why not today Shashin?"
I could tell he wanted to here it from his face,
"We'll talk tomorrow, I will tell you about it tomorrow,"
He didn't answer just nodded his head till I started having second thoughts, Should I just tell him now or should I just wait till tomorrow? No I should just tell him now, I'm sure he wasn't going to concentrate on anything till I tell him, and that won't be good, he's already worried enough, I can't worry him more,
"Ok I'll tell you now,"
"Ok please tell me,"
"Keiley, you haven't been yourself lately, you've been worried for nothing and I don't like it, you are afraid that Ronny is going to take me away from you that you aren't even concentrating in anything, but to say the truth, no one can even take me away from you Keiley, and you know that."
"I don't know anything Shashin, you should make me know it,"
"I and Leah talked with Ronny and he assured us that there is nothing he wants from me, that he's only acting as a friend, so please stop your fears,"
"What makes you so sure Shashin that he won't take You from me, he..."
"It's because i love you Keiley, you have stolen my heart that I can't feel it anymore when I'm not with you, I'm useless and a no one without you, haven't you seen it yet Keiley? I love you and no one can take me from you,"
Where was that strong girl gone, my tears had started coming out from my eyes and I didn't know why,
"You, you think it is easy for me? I'm afraid of the future, I'm afraid of what tomorrow holds for us and that's why I didn't want to tell you, I didn't know that coming here would make me fell in love, especially with someone like you, yo...yo..."
"Hey it's enough, I understand, I get you, and that's the only thing I wanted to here, please now calm down, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry, let me take you home so you can take rest, I don't expect anything negative coming out from you now, I'm sorry dear, Keiley's hug was genuine, it was so true, I felt it and I wanted more of it, it was warm and nice and it made me fee better.
At least I am free now, at least I have let it all out, something I was trying to hide for a long time I spoke it out, and it felt good to do that, but after the crying I felt some joy things will now be good.
Chapter 20
Even after confessing my feelings to Keiley I still couldn't understand him, he was still worried about something, thou he was trying to hide it I could still see and sense it. So I decided to question him about it, maybe i could help.
"Do you trust me?" I decided to question in one of our discussion,
"Yes, of cause why do you ask that?" He asked surprisingly,
"I notice that you are still worried about something, we already talked about it right?"
"Yes, we did,"
"Then what is it that worries you, why won't you just tell me,"
"I will tell you just not now,"
"Why Keiley? I'm troubled when you are troubled and that's why I'm asking, or should i give you space, then when you feel it's ok you can tell me," I was getting angry,
"No, please don't, I will tell you,"
"Go ahead,"
"It's about Ronny,"
"Ronny? What about him? I already told you he's not a threat,"
"Because that's what he wants you to think,"
I stared at him for a moment, this love thing is getting worse for him, he fears nothing, he hasn't even been with Ronny yet he talks as if he knows him.
"Ronny is not a good person Shashin," he added,
"I know,"
"You do?"
"Yes, that's the feelings you are going to have when you think someone is being taken from you, but that isn't going to happen,"
"Shashin"
"Hey stop it," I interrupted him," I will make you and Ronny meet and after you hear him talk maybe you will get to know he's not a bad guy,"
"Shashin, I don't blame you, I know i fear loosing the person i love but that's not just the fear I'm having, for now you may fail to trust me, that's why I didn't want to tell you yet, you don't know what Ronny did, and if you come to know then may be you and Lear's friendship won't last, for now I won't say anything, but one day you will know,"
After saying all this he stood up and left me at the table, that is something that has never happened, and by doing that I came to know that the situation is serious, not just the way I was thinking but worse on that, what could Ronny have done that could push my friendship with Leah away? Is he so bad than he looks? The gifts the good talks is it all just a pretence, and whatever he did, did he do it to Keiley or to someone else? The way Keiley acted wasn't the way he usually does even when he's angry, so there was definitely something into it and I have to find out since I don't think Keiley will tell me for he fears mine and Leah's relationship would break.
Chapter 21
On reaching home I found Leah and his brother talking, at least now he came at the right time and found his sister. I didn't even think of greeting him for I had started thinking bad of him after what happened Keiley.
"Hey, aren't you going to say hi!" Leah sounded surprised,
"Ohh sorry, hello Ronny," I greeted trying to show some interest,
"Hello, hope thee is no problem with you, you look stressed," he commented,
"No, I'm ok I'm just tired,"
"Are you Shashin? I know you and you aren't just tired but stressed, is anything wrong?" Lear asked,
"No I'm ok,"
"Well if you are that's ok, I just hope no one messed with my sister's best friend in this school,"
"No Ronny, no one could do that I'm ok,"
"Ok then would you mind joining us?"
"No Leah, I'm feeling tired I think I should rest,"
"Ok you take rest dear," I wasn't really ok, I was left at the discussion table without knowing the main reason, how could I be ok. I was later woken up by Leah to have dinner,
"Hey, what's the problem? I noticed you aren't ok," she started,
"No I'm ok,"
"Please don't lie to me talk to me,"
"You won't feel bad about what I'll ask will you?"
"No Shashin, just tell me,"
"How well do you know your brother, I mean can he be involved in hurting someone?"
"I'm,from the way I know him, he gets angry quickly and from the anger he can do anything, why do you ask thou?"
"You see, Keiley thinks he isn't as good as I see him so I was just wondering,"
"Ooh maybe he's jealous,"
"Yea, but he sounded even more serious this evening,"
"Another problem with my brother is that he can be too possessive, he does not like sharing what he treasures, but he said he isn't into you so I'm sure he couldn't do anything, Keiley is just jealous of my brother, make him understand that you love him only,"
I guess Leah was right, Keiley might be too jealous that he starts making up things thou I've heard him do that, I myself I'm scared of talking to him about Ronny, he might take it as if I'm not on his side, but when he's worried I'm not comfortable also, each Time I'm with him he sounds even more worried as if there's something he fears when I'm with him, I tried as much as I could to distance myself from him in few days just to see how he would take it and his often visits reduced and he didn't complain or ask why I failed some discussions. Is it just Ronny or is Keiley using lies about Ronny to hide something from me?
Chapter 22
s days went by I pretended to be cool but it was getting out if hand.
"What's wrong with you Keiley? What is it you are hiding?" I decided to face him one day,
"What do you mean?" He asked surprisingly,
"As if you don't know, you've really changed a lot, you act careless with me these days what is it with you?"
"I'm sorry, I know I haven't been acting myself lately with you but im sorry, I'm just trying to make things work between us, I don't want any of us to get hurt,"
"What do you mean, get hurt by what, as of now I'm already hurt, it's like I don't know you anymore you..."
"Hey I'm sorry, I'm going to put everything fine again I promise,"
Staring at him is what was left for me to do, what is he really hiding that he can't tell me,
"If you want things to go well between us the you have to tell me what's going on?"
"Shashin,"
"Don't call me, unless you are going to tell me what's going on, and it should contain the truth if not you won't like what I'll do,"
He looked at me with surprise on his face, it's like he couldn't believe what I was telling him,its like the anger in me scared him, but that was for the truth, I wanted the truth no Matter what, if not let him not talk to me.
"Ok I'll tell you the truth about what's going on,"
"Yes please go ahead.
I waited for a while before I could here him speak, anyways he needed that silent to tell the truth, I was only hoping that he wasn't forming another story having lies to tell me,
"Hey tell me, you've been avoiding me for the past says, you don't even care to come see me when we don't meet, it's like things have changed,"
"I can promise you that its not like that, then speak to me, tell me the truth now," I was using orders get the truth, that wasn't me but I had to do it.
Chapter 23
Even after hearing what he told me I still couldn't believe it,
"Are you sure about what you are telling me?"
"I knew you won't believe me that's why I didn't wanna tell you now,"
"So this is the reason why you've been distancing yourself from me? Or maybe you are just scared,"
"I promise you, yes I'm doing it because of fear, the fear of something negative happening but not the fear that you think, I'd rather die for you than loose you,"
"Hey, it hasn't gotten there yet, no body is going to die, and if this is the truth then we'll make everything well,"
" It won't be easy,"
"I know so we'll do it even if it takes time,"
"Ok, but please don't tell or ask Leah about it, we don't know what will happen when she knows,"
"Fine, I won't tell her, I will have to leave now,"
"Ok, but please lets do what we've discussed,"
"Ok"Even thou I heard the whole story my sins still wasn't settled, I didn't know what to believe and what not to believe, the situation was all confusing and staying quiet would confuse me more.
When i arrived Leah was sleeping, at first I thought she was just relaxing but later I realized she wasn't feeling well,. I quickly left to get some antibiotics for her to cool her down but she got worse at night, I wasn't thinking Clearly of what to do, it's obvious the school nurse wouldn't be present at this late hour,i thought of Calling Keiley but remembering what he had told me I just called Ronny, he was her brother so I was sure she wasn't going to waste time and he didn't in less than half an hour he was in our room, he came to take Leah to the hospital, her condition was also scaring me, ever since we started together she's never been this way.
At the hospital we were glad she wasn't at that bad condition, her body reacts badly with sickness so she should report to the hospital early whenever she feels unwell.
"Thanks dear, I don't know what would have happened if you were not here with her,"
"It's ok, at least she's is going to be fine,"
"Yes thanks to you,"
"No need Ronny, Leah has done much more for me than I could ever do for her, she's more like a sister to me,"
"I understand, and for that a very big thing is coming,"
"No you don't have to do anything its ok,"
"I insist,and I don't think Leah would like it if I just let it go like that she's my sister,"
"Yes but,"
"But nothing, just accept it,"
"Ok," I accepted thou not because I wanted to, Keiley asked myself not to pic things from Ronny but I guess I have no choice.
Chapter 24
Soon enough, Leah recovered, she had gotten better after some days of medication. I was one day woken up with Leah at almost 12am, I was worried since I didn't know what was happening, and more surprisingly she gave me a dress which she said Ronny had bought for her, a new beautiful and experience dress and asked me to wear it,
"No Leah I can't accept this, anyways where are we going in this late hour?"
"My parents are in town and they are traveling this night, I can't go alone I need you to take me,"
"But you can ask Ronny to come take you right?"
"Yes but he says he can't make it,"
"Ok, I'll take you but I'll wear my own dress this one was bought for you,"
"Please I insist where it for me, it's getting late already,"
I had to take it because of her insisting that I should, thou I wasn't comfortable what will Ronny think then he sees me wearing his sister's dress.
We left to some hotel which she said her parents were in,
"Hey I think I forgot my phone, " I said
"It's ok, we won't be here for long," Leah replied
"Happy birthday Shashin!!"
What was happening here, there were students from the campus, my classmates, all shouting Happy birthday, it was my birthday, how come I didn't even remember it, it was really a surprise, I just turned and hugged Leah with tears flowing from my eyes, I couldn't believe this was happening, I never thought I'd ever have such a surprise birthday party and at 12 the time my birthday starts, it was really good.
"Thanks Leah, but im angry at you why didn't you tell me about it and lies to me,"
"If I did it wouldn't be a surprise and the person who planned it all wouldn't have forgiven me,"
Those words made me alert and started looking around, I couldn't see Keiley, maybe he planned all this for me to remove all the stress I had been having.
"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you," it was a voice from the corridor, I couldn't make it clear in my mind whose voice it was till he showed his face.
"Ronny,"
"Yes Shashin, Happy birthday,"
"Why did you do all this?"
"I had told you I awe you for helping my sister that day, and this is the only way I could think of paying you the favor,"
"But there was no need for..."
"Hey birthday girl, just say thank you for thank you," I was distracted by Leah,
"Thank you," I said,
"You are welcome but you didn't have to," replied Ronny,
"Leah can you take me to the bathroom?" I asked Leah and she agreed.
"Why is Keiley not here Leah?
Leah couldn't answer she was quiet but why?
Chapter 25
"Everyone I know from the campus is here so why isn't he here?"
" I don't know dear, students from the campus were sent invitation, I don't know why he isn't here,"
"Or maybe he wasn't sent,"
"Only you didn't know about this surprise, everyone one did,"
"Then would you please lend me your phone let me call him."
My efforts did not work, he did not pick my calls as much I called him.
"What's wrong?" Leah asked,
"He isn't picking up, what if there's a problem?"
"Hey calm down, it's late he might be sleeping,"
"But he never misses to pick at anytime I call him, even late at night,"
"Don't worry, maybe his phone is in silent mode, we'll try calling him later, for now you..."
"Hey, everyone is waiting for the cake," it was Ronny,
"Yes we are coming," Leah replied,
"That's what I was saying, it's your birthday, try to celebrate, I'm sure Keiley is fine, we will try calling him later ok?"
I nodded my head for agreement thou inside my heart I felt as if there's something wrong, just couldn't tell what it was.
As we were coming from the bathroom they were singing me a happy birthday song, it was a great party and I'm sure everyone who attended it will remember, It was a lavish one, there were lots of drinks and different kinds of food to eat, but thou it was the birthday party anyone would wish to have, I never enjoyed it, I was all worried through out the party trying to call Keiley who wasn't picking my calls, I wished for the party to end quickly for me to go find him but no, time went slower than it usually goes, and then there was Ronny coming towards my direction, I didn't wanna talk to him or anything, as talking could cause my tears of worry to come out, I could sense that even my voice would sound different.
"Hello, why are you sitting alone here while others are enjoying,"
"I'm," I tried to gather courage," I'm just not used to such parties, that's why I thought of sitting here,"
"Well there are many more parties you will be attending so I guess you just have to get used to it,"
"Actually, I'm very thankful that you plan all this for me, I really didn't expect it, but it wasn't really a must that you do it for me,"
"What do you mean,"
"I mean a birthday wish would be ok, and even if it was about parting, We would had a house party and only close friends would have attended, not the whole school and some friends missing," I think I was going over the limit,
Chapter 26
"But everyone is here, I tried my best to call all your friends and classmates,"
"Then where's Keiley? Why is he not here? Was he not invited?"
"Everyone was invited, maybe he just didn't wanna come, "
"But he'd never miss such a day for me even though he has a problem..."
"Hey, what's happening here?" Leah interrupted, and it was just on time, I almost spilled out the beans about what Keiley told me.
"Nothing sister, Shashin was just worried about Keiley," Ronny answered,
"Well, I told you maybe he's asleep, so he can't pick your call," Leah said,
"Or maybe he got the invitation and forgot," added Ronny, I couldn't stop staring at him when this words came out from him. Was he crazy? How could he think that Keiley could forget such a day? He knows all of me how can he even forget that?
"Hey, let's go, the party can't go on without the birthday girl," said Leah.
"Ok," I said still my eyes on Ronny, I was thinking what he could have done this time, Keiley's words about him were now coming clear to me, i guess he was up to something but before i get to know it I must find Keiley. The party ended early because I wasn't in the mood for all of it, my first thing to find was my phone, what if Keiley had tried calling me or something, and also he will definitely pick my calls since I'll be using my number.
I wasn't wrong, he had tried calling me a couple of times. And he was also not picking up my calls again when I called him so at it made me worried. I took a quick shower and left, I thought I should try finding him at his place, Leah was tired from the party that she slept immediately she arrived, that was the day I found Keiley's place to be far, I wasn't getting there, and now his phone was off, was everything really ok? I had to encourage myself about it since that was my only choice. When I arrived I found his door open, with no one inside, the house was all messy which wasn't the Keiley's way, so what was really going on, and there was no one around I thought I could ask about where he was.
I decided enough was enough, we can't leave like this, I'm going to do d Ronny and confront him about where he had taken my Keiley, he can't make my life miserable, it's the second time Keiley is missing and it's not usual. I called him but he couldn't be reached, maybe he was also tired from the party but I can't rest till I find him, this was becoming the worse birthday from what I thought was the best.
Chapter 27
I got a surprising kinda message giving me the address of a place and asking me to go there, the number was new and after trying to call it got switched off, maybe it's something to do with Keiley, there was no time to think, I had to rush there as soon as possible.
I took a cub and quickly left to the given address, I didn't know what was awaiting me but I knew it was important and I had to be there. When i reached there there was no one, the place was deserted. I decided to call the number again but it was not reachable. Even thou the place was quiet I didn't any fear. But on looking around my eyes saw something, I wasn't quite sure if they were playing a trick on me but I thought I should confirm what it was.
The more I went the more saw them further, they seemed like trees but not, I didn't give up but just decided to move towards it without thinking whether I'll get lost or not.
I finally got there, I couldn't believe it, it was a decoration, a birthday decoration, which again reminded me of my birthday which had gone out of my mind. There were beautiful colored flowers surrounding the area, a table for two with a bottle of wine and a beautiful cake on it, but there was no one, what kind of a surprise is this? How would someone plan a surprise in such a place? I didn't trust what was happening? Was it a way of abducting me because this place looks like an abandoned place, no people come here so why was I called here and by who? My head got the wrong thoughts, Keiley is missing, I just had a party yesterday and everyone was invited, Ronny wasn't picking his calls and I was texted with an unknown number, how stupid am I to even come here? I immediately thought of leaving before anything bad happens again, things had already become worse I wouldn't want another problem. The suddenly my hand was pulled, I stood in fear, who was it that was pulling me,
"You?" I couldn't believe it, what was really happening, was I dreaming or is this reality?
I was stunned and didn't know what to do, was I to be happy that he was here or was I to be angry with him? Should I hug him or slap him for putting me into worry? I just stood there helpless staring at him.
Chapter 28
While I was still lost in my senses, I felt his warm soft hands around me,
"Happy birthday love," he said,
I pushed him, I was angry and words weren't even ready to come out,
"Hey relax, come sit here," he said but I don't think I heard what he said next, I just saw his mouth moving then black is what happened next.
Definitely not the kind of birthday I would wish for and not anyone would ever wished for such a birthday, in confusion I didn't know what it was and how I was feeling about it, is this how some relationships are? Someone makes you worried than you've ever been then later comes out with a surprise? Or was I the only one in such? I didn't understand it quiet well,
"Hey wake up," that's the next thing I heard him say,
"I think you were loosing air, are you ok,"
I just looked at him, why would he do this? I could swear I would never get worried about him again but I don know what tomorrow holds, he makes me worried than I've ever been for anyone, but i guess this is what we call love?
"Hey are you listening?" A slap is what he got after asking this question, and then tears, I'm sure he didn't understand why I did that but i felt it wasn't enough punishment for him.
"Happy birthday love," he wished me again,
"I made this for you, sorry it's in a deserted place but I thought it was the better place for me to be with you, I know you have some questions for me but let's handle all of it later, I k you are tired after what happened, so please, will you?"
He moved a chair and I moved to sit,
"Isn't there anyone else here? Who helped you in preparing all this?"
"I did it alone for you,"
Well I guess this white guy was trying to act romantic it seems, but it doesn't mean I've forgiven him,
"I'm still angry with you don't forget that!"
"Yes I greatly apologize for that,"
"It's not enough,"
"I agree but please can we make this birthday a happy one for now then we'll look at the case later, please,"
I nodded in agreement, I thought it was better that I was with him, at least i celebrated part of my birthday with him around and ok, we'll tackle everything later. A music was put on and we danced thou I found it hard with that dance but he saw no problem, and he made me not to feel ashamed of my dancing, later we finished with the cake and had meaningless discussions I guess just to pass time,
"I guess this is your last birthday in campus but I guess not the last for us to celebrate together," he said but I didn't have the answer to that.
Chapter 29
I agree with you about her performance but I feel this is the end,"
"The end of what? This is her future,"
"Yes, so what should I do?"
"Uncle please,"
"Listen dear, I congratulate you for your good performance but if you can try to look at the situation, things aren't going well enough out here, things will be hard for us to manage, I'm leaving you think about it or find your own way of paying for your own studies,"
I remembered this with Keiley's words, I stay with my mother and younger brother, my uncle used to assist in paying my high school fees and after I was done, he said it was too expensive for me to join any compass and it will also be a waste of time because people get lost by bad behaviours there.
Me getting here was by the help of my high school principal who helped me get sponsored, then how would it be possible for me to get back here again when it was hard getting here?
I slept off thinking about all this, the day was long anyways with all the Keiley worries, it was only some few months before we draw apart after I leave for Africa, and from there, I had no hopes of seeing anyone from here by coming here.
There was no school on the following day and I choose to go at Keiley's house, to spend the day there.
When I got there, I found him relaxing, it was a surprise since I didn't tell him I would be coming, looking at him he could tell I wasn't ok, there was something and he was right, there was something,
"Hey what is it? You didn't even tell me you were coming,"
"We need to talk," that's the only reply I could give.
"Ok, I'm all ears, you can tell me,"
Keiley I," I don't know where this came from but tears started dropping from my eyes,
" Hey," he got close and caressed me,
"Hey, it's ok, its ok, please come down,"
The more he calmed me down the more I broke,"
"Hey look at me," he said holding my head so I could face him but I couldn't, I just couldn't,
"I'm sorry," he started apologizing with no reason,
"I did a mistake, you can punish me but please stop crying for my sake,"
After a while I calmed down.
"I need to tell you something important,"
"Yes tell me, and try to control those tears,"
"This can't happen,"
"What can't happen?"
I covered my eyes with my hands, this isn't going to be easy as it's already killing me inside, what will it do to him?
Chapter 30
"What's going on tell me?
"Hey what's happening?"
As he was asking the words weren't coming out, I could only feel myself breathing loudly and at a high speed,
" Are you ok?"
I couldn't answer,
He lay me down slowly,
"I want you to relax Shashin, don't put pressure on yourself," as he. Said this he wiped me with a cold piece of cloth till I was feeling ok, but the tears couldn't stop,
"Why is my Barbie in tears, how can you even cry while I'm here, who is it that's making you this way?" He was trying to console me, like a father consoles his little daughter, but the more he did the more I broke and he noticed this.
I felt him getting closer since I had still been covering my eyes, then I felt him putting his arms around me, maybe he thought a hug would be the best way to cool me since the others couldn't work, thou I always feel his hands are warm around me, this time I felt like they were more warmer, and the hug was followed by a kiss, something I've done with no one. And what followed was unexplained, something I never imagined would ever happen with him, but I guess it's the work of nature, bringing two lovers together. But how would I even face him after this? I felt it would be embracing that I didn't do what brought me here.
Chapter 31
Days turned to be going fast to weeks and weeks to months, the courage I had of telling Keiley about us disappeared, and I started feeling weired,
"Are you ok Shashin?" Leah who has been observing me for a while asked,
"I'm not sure, I've been feeling unwell for the past few days,"
"I feel you should go see the school nurse for texts, "
"No I'll be ok,"
"Ok then but try to rest then, Ronny will be coming this evening will you be here?"
"Yea, I want to rest a bit maybe ill feel better,"
"Ok dear,"
We were to be having our last exams as we wait for our graduation, where did this sickness come from? I have to be ok to pass my last exams.
In the evening, Ronny came, and as usual with lots of gifts, I wasn't in the mood to wake up but I thought I should otherwise he would start acting worried and keep coming for visits always. Walking was hard since I wasn't stable, I was feeling dizzy than usual then down I fell, I woke up on my bed, both Ronny and Leah sorted waiting for me to wake up,
"I'll leave now," Ronny said as he left.
This wasn't how he usually does things, maybe there's something wrong.
"Leah, what happened?"
"I have some news for you but I'm not sure how you'll take it,"
"Why? What's the news?"
"You are pregnant, that's the news,"
"What?"
"Yes, aren't you happy, you are going to be a mother soon, and you are pregnant for someone you love, isn't that cool, we are also going to graduate soon,"
"I'm pregnant?"
"Yes, and I'm going to call Keiley and tell him the good news,"
"No you can't," I stopped her,
"But why? He's the father isn't he?"
"Yes, but..."
"But nothing, and make sure I get a good name from the baby, I'll inform Keiley,"
"No please don't, I will tell him myself, I'm sure it will be good if I do that myself."
"Great, thou it's a good news, it made Ronny angry, you know he has been Aying you for a while so this really shock him, anyways, you get some rest I'll find some food for us."
Was this good or bad news for me? Was I to be happy or mad about what I've heard, I'm pregnant for the man I love but I don't see this relationship going well, so what will I do about it? Should I tell Keiley?
Chapter 32
I decided I wasn't going to tell him about it, I know he has the right to know but I didn't think it would be a good idea to tell him, I will just hide it and after graduating I'll leave for home, I could only pray that Leah wouldn't spill the beans.
He might have noticed or maybe not that I was acting weired with him, my tummy had started growing and my behavior was also changing, but according to the my dressing I was sure he wouldn't notice and I guess I was wrong.
"What have you decided?" He asked me after the say of our graduation.
"I'm going home,"
"You are?"
"Yes, I'm going to see my mom, why are you asking like that? Don't you want me to go?"
"No it's ok, you can go, but when will you come back for us?"
"I'm not sure about coming,"
"What?"
"I wanted to tell you this before but I didn't know how to,"
"Before was fine, but what about now, are you really willing to separate me and my baby just like that?"
"What do you mean your baby,"
"You think I don't know? When were you going to tell me that you were pregnant? Were you ever going to tell me that I was going to be a father, were you?"
"Keiley..."
"No, stop with the calling of my name and answer me, you are already denying me time to spend with you are you going to do this with my child too? When i heard this it was the best news for me and I was waiting for you to say it but I guess you were never going to. I allow you to go home for your family but please bring me my child so we can stay together, if you don't then I'll come there myself. Have a nice time,"
"Keiley, Keiley,"
I tried to call but it was all in vain, he left angry and me troubled. What was next for me to do, I felt I was the worst person there was, I was going to keep my child from its father and leaving Keiley without even knowing that I was expecting his child, I spent my night crying in thoughts about what I was going to do, Leah who could console me was also angry with me for trying to run away as she called it with another man's baby which was definitely not fear since it was my child too, but what next, what should I do?
Chapter 33
One thing I thought was going to help me find her was by ensuring that I am the boss, I should say it didn't take me a long time because of how influential my parents were. It's been a year since she left, without a goodbye, there has not been any communication for six months now, and nothing about my child. Not even her best friend has information about her, so in a way it's making me worried.
I made sure to find a good company in her country Kenya, and gladly it was in her own home town, I bought shares but later it was all left to me, my family had enough money to ensure the company is run so I didn't need help in it. After the company was ready there were lots of announcement and advertisement about our work, but it was only for the few who had certain qualifications. My aim of doing all this was in order to find my lost love, who i am sure is now a mother, the mother of my baby, and I could only pray that she turns up in the interviews I will be having with the interviewers.
When I arrived, I could see everything she was telling me about her country, I drove around the city hoping that maybe my eyes would capture her. In the CVs I got I didn't get any of her and it was loosening my spirit, my aim of coming here was only for her and my child so why isn't she showing up? It was really Stressing me out.
We started with the interviews and to be honest, people are quite good here, but where was my Shashin? She was the best if them all.
There was only one interview left, and the interviewee was late, I don't know if it was fear but I was angry, there a time set for all this? Does she think we are playing games by waiting for her? I decided to leave my office and go walk around when I got a phone call saying she is finally here, I was angry in a way that I asked them to turn her back,
"Tell her to go and continue resting we aren't here to waste time," I said,
"But sir where will we find someone as qualified as her she's the best for this,"
"Ok show her my office,"
My Shashin would have been more qualified than she is but she didn't show up. While I was still in thought there was a door knock,
"Come in," I said waiting to give her all I could think of, but when she entered everything I wanted to say disappeared, I couldn't utter anything but just stare, it was her, she was finally here.
Chapter 34
Thou looking at her, there was something different, she didn't seem surprised at all to see me, it was as if she had never seen me before, but I didn't care, I quickly run to her and gave her a hug,
"Thank God i finally found you, I had lost all hopes of seeing you again," instead of her returning the hug she pushed me,
"What's with you, is this how you people interview the interviewees, what are you doing?" She said with an angry voice that I remembered too well.
"Shashin, it's me, Keiley remember?"
"I'm sorry sir I don't recognize you, I only came here for my interview,"
"What's wrong with you, what happened to you? What about our..
Ok let's do the interview thou I don't see the need then we can talk later,"
What was wrong with her, how can she not remember me? We studied together and were even loves, is this all just pretence? I wasn't sure about that because she acted as her words said, like we've never met, what was happening?
I tried my best to interview her buy it was impossible, I just couldn't,
"Well done, you've passed, you can start your job tomorrow," I said, thou the work was to start the following week, I saw no need of waiting, after all she is the reason I came here, and because of her behavior she'll need a lot observation.
If it was the truth that she wasn't remembering anything, then what happened to her, and also what if she was just pretending not to know me? I've got to find out the truth about what is happening.
The next day I arrived early, I was thinking of releasing her early and following her so I could know everything about what is happening. So when she arrived her sit was given to her, thou she was more qualified, I posted her as my secretary so she could be even close. There I would call her and ask her about her friend Leah, whom she also said she doesn't remember, surprisingly I acted in a funny way, the way we used to in campus, but there was no reaction that she recalled anything, she acted normal and at other times she would look at me in a surprised kind of way, as if I was crazy, maybe she really doesn't remember anything, but, but how? Does she even know that we were to have a child together and if not I'm sure she gave birth then who stays with our child when she comes here? Following her would answer my questions and I made sure I did that till I met one of her friends, who always went home with her after work.