I WASN'T LOOKING FOR LOVE, NOT AT ALL. All I had in mind was simply to find a man I could bear to live with and have a family, as long as he was wealthy and would be courageous enough to go against my family if they ever tried to do something against me. And all of that, while avoiding, Alina Desormeaux and Luc Von der Meer, the female and the male lead of the novel altogether, so the development would still happen as it should and I wouldn't get involved with either the hero and heroine or Dylan Reverdin and Josephine Van Hoorn, the villain and the villainess of the novel.
That way I would still be able to stay the fuck alive and live a good life, without being tortured. While also doing my best to make all of my newfound dreams come true, like becoming a singer and a writer, under an alias. Because for God's sake, can you believe there's no good song to hear here but classic shit?
Like, seriously, how can someone live without Taylor Swift? Harry Styles, Adele, Justin Bieber, Sam Smith, or Dua Lipa? I know I can't. And they will discover they can't either when I sing all of my idols' songs for them to hear. Thank God I have a perfect voice for singing their songs. Can you believe I can even go as higher as Ariana Grande?
Damn, I have a holy throat!
Back there, every time I tried to sing, I sounded like a goat who swallowed a camel and tried to talk in a dead language while he still had water in his mouth. Yeah, pretty horrible.
And who can live without reading Jane Austin? Or Jules Verne? Sarah J. Mass, Jennifer L. Armentrout, J. R. R. Tolkien, Julia Quinn, or Rick Riordan? All the stories those dumbasses are losing. Can you believe they don't have Harry Potter?
I don't know what shocks me the most. Not to mention the stories of my favorite movies, animations, dramas, and series. And the fact that I died at 22 before I could read the last book in George R. R. Martin's The Song of Ice and Fire series, or without even knowing the ending of One Piece.
How miserable. Just remembering that makes me want to cry until I ball my eyes out.
But back to the marriage thing, I needed someone who wouldn't cheat on me, and who wouldn't lock me up and prohibit me from doing the things I like. Otherwise, I would have to kill him.
And THAT is one of the good points of living in such a historical world. We can easily get rid of someone as long as we do it in a good way, so no one would learn the truth. It's way easier than how I had to trust the corrupt cops and the lacking law system back on earth.
Don't get me wrong, though. I haven't killed anyone yet. But I don't discard the possibility. Especially regarding these family members of mine. Although I'll try to avoid doing so the best I can. Which won't be so difficult, since I still have my magic, and the surprise effect, once none of them have no idea about it.
Again, I'm getting away from the topic.
Well, all of those thoughts I had on marriage, were the reason I asked for Sir Jacob Chardin, the firstborn son and heir of Count Alban Chardin, and a Knight of the Royal Army, to marry me on my coming-of-age ceremony when I has just turned 15. To me, he was the best option, and it was even better because, like myself, he was also just briefly mentioned once in the novel and had no spotlight.
Jacob's quite handsome, having chestnut shoulder-length straight hair, honey-colored eyes that almost shone like amber under the sun, tan skin, thin but still muscular, and almost a head taller than me. He's also good with the sword, honest, kind, and responsible with his duties. Out of all the targets I had in mind, who fit my standards, and didn't stand out, he was the best one.
Being 4 years older than me, getting engaged to me would be good for both of us. He would also be blessed to have my children, especially if they took their looks, magic range, and IQ from me. And he seemed to understand that as well since he accepted my proposal right on the spot.
Which was great since I wouldn't have to be humiliated publicly by being rejected on my coming-of-age ball in front of everyone present. Again, I did my best to only invite the people who were on the sidelines and farther away from the main leads and the villains of that stupid novel. Also, as the ball also was the twins' coming-of-age ball, I managed to take the spotlight away from them and get it all centered on me.
It was satisfying.
But again, that was when I was 15. I'm 19 now. It's been 4 years, and our engagement has been constantly postponed because of the war and all the shit that's been happening. I don't mind, since I'm glad about my choice of marrying him.
In the moments we could be close to one another, enough to call each other by our first names, and because of that, I believe we were able to reach a peaceful and friendly zone. A little beyond the line of what a convenience marriage generally entails. The only problem was that both Jacob and everyone else believed I loved him, just because I was the one who proposed, and it's uncommon for a woman to propose here. And I didn't bother denying it, since it could affect the outcome I'm thriving for.
Maybe that was my mistake.
Not considering love. Both from my part and Jacob's. That has to be the reason why all went south before it worked as I had first planned.