[ELLIS' POV]
Since I've met Eros again, it's like I'm back to my feelings again. Yes, I admit it already!
I'm in love with him, STILL.
All of our memories together, I still remember it, all of those moments that we've shared when we were kids... it has never been forgotten.
"Ellis! Ellis!"
I forgot I'm still talking to her.
She video called me.
I'm using my laptop here at my condominium, and she can't wait for my news from Eros earlier.
"You're still thinking about him, aren't you?"
She teases.
"I-I'm not." I looked away.
She chuckles, "Oh my sweet best friend, I don't know what to do with you, you still have a boyfriend but you're flirting with your brother."
"I will tell him the truth."
"Who?"
"Eros," I say.
"So, you're more concerned to your brother."
"Of course! I'm scared of him."
"More than Castor?"
"Yes. I already saw Castor get mad but, seeing Eros gets mad at me, I don't know what to do with that."
"Actually, yeah, I don't see Mr. CEO getting mad at meetings or his rounds, he's always smiling, you know. He knows how to create an atmosphere that is bright and full of hope and love."
"See? He's like that. He gets concerned or worried but he never gets mad. So, it's scarier."
"So, what about Castor?"
"I will also tell him the truth, when he comes back, I will break up with him."
"Poor guy."
"He doesn't deserve me," I say.
"Well, sometimes, I hate him, like, the way he's so obsessed with you, you know."
I chuckle.
"If you're already decided, I respect that. But you have to expect that he will get hurt and we cannot stop this, I mean control it. He may curse you forever."
"I know."
She sighs, "And I know you didn't even love Castor in the first place, it's all about sex."
"You know what I've been through before and the way I acted, I was so focused on giving up and letting myself get wasted and do kinds of stuff that I don't before. I was..."
"Yes, I know. You're the worst of the worst. Don't do that again, I mean, don't ever."
She's right.
I don't want to remember those times when I...
Brokedown and almost die.
"Let's forget about that," I say to her.
She picks on her nose and I let her since she always does that when we're doing video calling.
"Then you met Castor, he took care of you."
"I know. But..."
"You don't love him."
"I care for him," I answered, honestly.
"But you will not choose him, right?"
I looked down.
She sighs again, "Did you even ask Mr. CEO that you want to be more than brothers?"
"I don't even know if I can do that."
"But you said earlier, something happened that you've realized that he treated you not as a brother but as a lover."
"Uhm... I don't know if I can call that a lover. Maybe, I overreacted. I mean, we've just kissed, it was hot I know he erected, and mine too. But..."
"Shit. I want to see him get erected! Is it big? How did he kiss? Did it feel good?"
She's getting excited.
That's why I don't want to tell her but, I don't have a choice. She's the only one who I can talk to, about this.
"But, Dione, I don't understand him, at all. I mean, yes, we are brothers, not related, he gives me motives that I think... he likes me too, or even loves me! But, he makes excuses and changes the topic, he kisses me, which should not be because we are brothers, but he did! Not just once, but twice! In the same day!"
"This is complicated. No, this is getting complicated. If he loves you, not as a brother but romantically, he should just say so! You're not even related! Relationships in the same gender are already known to the world!"
I didn't reply.
I don't even know what to reply, I mean, she's right, so what's wrong? What's keeping him to not say the word?
——-
[EROS' POV]
I sigh.
I loosen my tie and I lean from the backseat of the car while Orion is driving and Griffin is in the passenger seat.
"I should have said that you're busy today."
"He will make me come, whatever happens, it doesn't affect him."
"I'm sorry."
"Griffin, don't say sorry. I'm okay."
"He made you drink and looked at you now, you're wasted. The only thing that's missing is women. And you will look like him."
I chuckle.
"Are you getting mad?"
"N-no. It's just... it was my fault not to stop him from getting drunk and letting you be the victim."
"It's fine." I answered, "I'm not drunk, I don't get drunk, remember?"
"Just wrecked?"
I chuckle.
I remove my jacket and my tie.
"It's so hot," I said.
Griffins turn the air conditioner in the car higher and Orion is eyeing me.
"Are you okay, Mr. Beckett?" He asked.
"Guys, I'm fine, okay? Don't worry about me."
"You're red," Griffin said.
I sigh.
It's really hot.
My whole body is hot.
Whenever the Chairman invites me to his mansion, not drinking is not an excuse for him.
But three years of not seeing him is like a reward for me. Because I hate him. I do. I still do. It's just, I need to respect him.
We still have our promises to keep.
"Sorry, I should have called you Mr. Beckett."
"Griffin, it's really fine if you call each other by names, you've been friends for a long time."
Orion comments.
"Thank you, Orion." Griffin said and continues, "But for me, keeping our friendship aside for work is important. We should not put our personal feelings at work."
"But, we cannot control it, right?"
I chuckle.
"Orion is my spirit animal," I said.
He stops the car as soon as the stoplight became red. They both looked at me.
My eyes are getting blurry.
I think I'm already sleepy. I mean, I didn't have a chance to sleep earlier and last night.
"You should take a nap first, Mr. Beckett."
I heard Griffin said.
I unbutton my white long sleeves and I feel really hot and dizzy. But I don't get drunk.
Maybe because it's been so long since I last drink hard liquor.
Thinking about what happened earlier with Ellis and me, made me smile. I want to see him again, I miss him already.
I miss his touch, his kisses, his embrace, his voice, his hair, his face, his everything.
I miss every part of it even if it is just for a moment, in those perfect moments, my problems, worries are gone.
But.
A barrier is still there.
I want to see him.
"I want to see him."
"What did you say, Mr. Beckett?"
"I-I want to see him."
"You mean..."
"Ellis," I answered.
"But it's late and we're almost at your penthouse-"
"But I want to see him." He says.
"Oh, no." Griffin reacted.
"What 'oh no', Griffin?" I heard Orion asking.
"It's his..."
"What is it?"
Griffin gulps.
"Griffin, you answer me, you're making me worry." Orion reacts while he's driving.
"It's his drunk behavior."
"What kind of behavior?"
What are they mumbling about?
"Mr. Beckett has clingy behavior when he's drunk."
"You mean, he likes to be clingy or attached to a person?"
"Yes, we better hurry up."
"Griffin. I'm serious. Let's stop by his condominium." I say to him.
"But he's already asleep. It's late, Mr, Beckett."
"I just want to see if his lights are on or off."
He sighs.
"Should I? It's his brother anyway." Orion said.
I heard Griffin sigh.
"Alright."
The car turns around.
I lean comfortably from the backseat and I closed my eyes, thinking... I should not have left him earlier.
I should not have met the Chairman and just continue to be with Ellis.
Ellis.
Ellis.
——-
Shit.
My back hurts.
My head hurts.
My whole body hurts!
Wait.
Did I just hear the birds chirping?
I slowly open my eyes and I first see is the white ceiling and I slowly sit up.
"Argh." My whole body hurts!
Shit.
"You're awake."
I heard someone speak, it was from my behind.
I turn around and I quickly moved away.
"W-what are you... w-why are you, wait, am I dreaming right?" I said in a panic.
"You're not dreaming."
"But, what are you doing here? Did you sleep here in my place?"
"Your place?"
I nodded.
"It's my place."
Huh?
I looked around and I see different pieces of furniture and the place is small. The kitchen is near the comfort room and I think I'm here in the living room.
"How did I get here?"
"You don't remember?"
"Last time I remember is when they're driving me home. Oh! Griffin. Where is Griffin?"
"He went home last night."
"And left me here?"
"Umm... you pushed him away and left him."
My head hurts!
"Shit. It hurts!"
That old man brings me misfortune!
"Wait, I'll just get some medicine-"
"No, w-wait." I held his hand.
"I feel cold. Why do I feel cold?"
"Maybe because you're naked?"
I immediately looked at my body and I'm only wearing a blanket, I looked underneath and my eyes widen.
"WHAT!" I cover myself in panic.
"Shh, you're being loud early in the morning."
"E-El, why are you being so not awkward about this? Tell me, I'm dreaming right?"
He chuckles, "You're not."
"Then, why are you being okay about it? And it looks like you're making fun of me."
"Because you're being so cute, Ros, that's why."
I sigh.
"But, I'm glad I'm just naked."
"You're just naked?" He sarcastically said.
"Why? Did I do something else? Wait! Did we-"
"Um..." He chuckles and he went to his room.
"El!"
A moment later, he went out of his room and went to the kitchen bringing a glass of water and medicine.
"Here, drink this first."
I looked at him and he's so cute, it's early in the morning and his lips are pouty.
"Ros, stop looking at my lips."
I looked away.
"Will you tell me what happened?"
"Okay."
I grab the medicine and the glass of water.
I took it and I looked at him.
"It started when..."
——-