I attend school early in the morning, and I return home at 7 p.m. Of course, people were still giving me looks, and still were talking about the rumors concerning Hyun-ki and I. But, I got through the day by being myself. Kallie and I watch a scary movie until around 8:30 p.m. I honestly wasn't scared, but I wish Hyun-ki was here with me. I could only have him on my mind. This was a misery considering that I couldn't even get close to him. I don't care about if I get heartbroken or not....I just need HIM. In saying that, I chose to contact the guy because I miss him.
From Me: Uuum. Hey Hyun-ki!
15 minutes later
From Hyun-ki: Hey MaeMae. How are you?
From Me: I'm okay. How about you?
From Hyun-ki: I'm okay...I miss you.
From Me: Why would you miss me? I miss you!
From Hyun-ki: I miss your sense of humor, smile, and your pinkish purplish hair.
From Me: 😂😂😂. I miss your smile, your laugh, and the food that we had the last day we were with each other. I regret not finishing that meal. It was delicious.
From Hyun-ki: The food huh? What if I sneak by your apartment tomorrow, and bring some food?
From Me: I don't hate that 😊.
From Hyun-ki: Then I'll see you tomorrow.
From Me: Okay, but what if someone sees you and follows you to my apartment?
From Hyun-ki: They won't. I'll be in disguise 😏.
From Me: Hyun-ki you could be wearing a mask, and I'd still notice you! 🤣
From Hyun-ki: Is that your way of saying you notice me out of all of the guys? 😅
From Me: Ki....I had a crush on you since I was 14 years old, watching your interviews and performances. Of course I notice you out of all of the guys.
From Hyun-ki: 😌🙂😝
From Me: You're so cute. *smh*
From Hyun-ki: You can't even see me.
From Me: I can imagine your face.
From Hyun-ki: 😜
From Me: I hope you're not making that face. That emoji looks like it's mentally unstable.
From Hyun-ki: 🤣
From Me: I gotta go. Talk to you later.
From Hyun-ki: Okay. Talk to you later.
I smile to myself from our cringy-cute conversation, and hug Kallie goodnight before heading to bed.
Suddenly, I notice my guitar sitting in the corner of my room. I haven't had time to play with it for a while. I decide to mess around with the instrument, which I had since I was 13 years old. I also have a piano, but the guitar seemed better in the moment. Plucking the strings felt familiar. The guitar is something that was never learned, because I taught myself. I still write songs easily, but always had trouble coming up with the beat. This time, however, I felt as if I had some inspiration.
If only I had known, that people meet this way.
The end of life comes
Like a boulder pushing its way through.
Don't shove me to the side
But you say I'll always be there to catch you.
I can breathe again, without effort.
Naturally you come to my mind.
Always feel like I never have enough time with you.
There's just not enough hours in the day to satisfy this forbidden fruit called you and I.
Your dimples, eyes, and smile.
Cleared my soul's darkness.
Does this make sense?
Do you understand me?
Don't you know how I feel?
An unexpected meeting, surreal.
Naturally you come to my mind.
Always feel like I never have enough time with you.
There's just not enough hours in the day to satisfy this forbidden fruit called you and I.
Woah! That felt....amazing. I never write songs about these kinds of relationships, but that was.....I don't know. I really like that.
I put my guitar down back on the stand, and plop down dramatically over the side of my bed like a fish. I turn on my stereo and play songs by Palaye Royale as I jump on the cushioned surface of my bed. I karaoke while jumping, like I'm on a trampoline. Then fall to my knees to sing every bridge of each song with the remote to my t.v. in one hand.
15 minutes later. I change into my black pajamas, then put my headwrap that covers the circumference of my hair and leaving my hair out. To finish the day off, I jump child-like onto the mattress, and put my sleep mask on. Everything went dark.