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Chapter 4 - Thinking Out Loud

I'm the largest disappointment

I know I'm worthless

Why does life always have to remind me that I'm not important

And then all I ever try to do is get everyone's attention

Maybe then I'll feel a little more important.

But I do it so much that I push everyone away

Make them hate who I am and avoid me everyday.

It's a continuous loop that I go through

Struggling finding who I am and feel like I slip right through.

All these people that are trying to make me into

The person they think I should be

And though i know it's not healthy

I still dont flee.

I allow them to do their worst to me.

Tear me apart and throw me to the ground.

I wish I'd never followed the path I'm on now.

I have no self esteem

And yet I'm selfish it seems

I'll never be the person all these people want me to be.

But I keep walking this path even though it's not straight.

I know that at the end there my true Father shall wait.

For this life won't be eternal

All those some may think it is.

This life is not mine for true life waits for me in heaven.