What is this? A-am I in our old house? That's my mother, and me? Why am I here? Why am I watching the events from my past?
I was thinking deeply when suddenly, I felt something weird.
"Woah, Woah, wait! What's going on?" My entire body, particularly my soul feels diverted towards myself in the past. Now I'm inside another body, and I'm looking through the eyes of my past self. Right now, it feels like the feelings I have are synced to the feelings I had before, it feels like I've been reincarnated in my past. Except that I'm just a first point of view spectator of myself from the past. I'm inside me, yet I can't do anything.
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I was about to leave when my mother grabbed onto my clothes and tried to pull me back to her. I could see the exhaustion in her face, her dress was tattered, and her hair was unkempt, just like always. She works tirelessly to keep our family afloat, but it all seems so futile. It's just too much. I can't handle it anymore.
Tears were streaming down her face as she held onto me, pleading with me not to leave. "Son, please don't leave us here. Think about your siblings, they'll miss you so much. And think about Jane, she'll be heartbroken without you here."
It broke my heart to see her like this, but I knew I had to go. I had to get out of this place, this life of poverty and struggle. I had to make something of myself, to bring back some hope to my family.
"Mom, please. Let me go. I promise I'll come back when I finish studying and find a good job to support all of you. Just collecting junk and selling it won't help us," I said, gently pulling away from her grip.
She wouldn't let go, though. "Your father left us, and now you're leaving too? How can you do this to us?"
I looked at her, my heart aching with guilt and sadness. "It's not like that, Mom. I'm not leaving you forever, just for a little while. I have to do this. For us."
I grabbed my things and started to walk away. I could hear my siblings crying, and my mother's sobs filled the air around me. It was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do, but I knew it was the right thing.
As I walked away, I felt the weight of my decision heavy on my shoulders. The road ahead would be tough, but I had to face it head-on. For my family, for myself, for our future.
"I'll come back," I whispered to myself, trying to keep my resolve. "I promise."
It's difficult to walk away from family, but it's even more challenging to stay with them and wake up every morning uncertain whether you'll have enough food to survive. However, the hardest part is seeing your family struggle with poverty and knowing you can't do anything to help. At just fourteen years old, while most teenagers are playing with friends, attending school, and bonding with their families, I am being forced by society to leave home and work for myself. Life is undoubtedly unfair.
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*Five Years Later*
"Congratulations, Damon! As expected, you are the class valedictorian," Sir Josh said as he smiled and shook hands with me. "What are your plans for college?"
I frowned my eyebrows as I looked up in the sky and said. "Maybe economics?"
"Why?"
"Well, I have some knowledge about being a car mechanic, so I'm thinking of establishing a business that is somehow related to that field."
"Oh, that's quite good! I look forward to your future!" He smiled and tapped my shoulder.
I bowed to him and said, "Thanks, sir!" I kept on smiling at him as I wave my hands to say goodbye.
As I walked away, I noticed that the school today is indeed vivacious. The event's stadium is deafening. The students seem to enjoy this unforgettable memory with their friends and their family. I smiled, thinking, what if my mom sees me here, graduating from high school as the valedictorian: an achiever and a soon-to-be multi-millionaire?
'She will be very proud of me!'
On second thought, maybe not, I guess she'll resent me for what I have done.
'What a bittersweet thought it is.'
I was walking and about to leave when suddenly someone lumped on my shoulder. "Hey! Damian, where are you going! Come on! Let's celebrate!" I immediately tried to look who's that and unfortunately, it's Marvin.
"I ain't going anywhere."
He jogged me and said, "Oh come on, man! I've been waiting for this for about a year now. I thought maybe you'll hang out with us since iiiiiit's…" He even spread out his arms slantwise as if presenting something. "Graduation day!"
I just facepalmed and shook my head off. "You're being obnoxious Marvin, go away, move! I have something to do."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, got something to do, I'm busy, I must get home fast," He said as if he's trying to imitate me. "You always say that. Why are you always in a rush? Don't tell me there's really something going between you and that old lady in your apartment," He said with a sardonic smile.
"Oh, for fuck's sake, Marvin, I work for her to stay there for free." I looked at him badly as I jogged him so that I can pass through.
He followed me and blocked my way again, and said. "Come on, bro, just this once, I feel bad if I just let you not being able to experience what it's like to be a teenager."
I stopped walking and stared at him for a moment, "Really, Marvin?" This time I raised my voice. "Please, please just scram! Don't tell me what to do. Unlike you, I'm a very busy person. Obviously, I know shits better than you do." I turned my back on him and continued walking. This time, Marvin didn't follow me. But from behind, I heard him saying, "One day, you'll regret it, Damian!"
I bit my lips and smiled.
'I know, but it doesn't matter since I already have too many of those.' I whispered to myself.
Marvin was one of my friends from school, and although we weren't as close as we used to be, we still hung out with the same group of people, four others besides us. All of them were good students, but none of them were as exceptional as I was. They spent their days playing games, hanging out, and bonding with each other, while I worked hard all by myself. It was difficult for them to understand the struggle that I had been through.
Five years ago, I left my family and started working at a car repair and auto shop as an errand boy, barely earning a dollar every day, just enough to feed myself. Thankfully, they provided me with water to drink and a place to stay, even if it was not enough to call it a home. However, it was still better than our house.
I worked there every day from morning till evening, and over time, I learned many things about car repair and car parts. A year later, I became a full-time mechanic, and they trusted me to work on more complicated projects. My work satisfied many customers, and some even gave me tips. On some lucky days, I could earn up to fifty dollars. With their help, I was able to save a lot of money to continue my studies.
When I had saved enough money, I bid farewell to the people who had taken care of me. I was sad, and so were they. I explained that I had to leave to continue my studies, and they agreed to let me go.
However, I soon realized that I did not have a place to stay. It was scary to think about living on the streets. Fortunately, I stumbled upon a free library with books on different subjects and courses, and on the same day, I found an old apartment with no customers. The old lady who owned the apartment agreed to let me stay there for free if I helped clean and improve the place to attract customers. With a free place to stay and study, I was finally able to prepare for the upcoming classes.
Despite the hardships I had faced, I considered myself lucky to have found such an opportunity.
In a spur of moment, as I walked to class lost in my thoughts, everything around me began to distort, as if I was being absorbed by a malignant force. The whole world shifted and changed around me, and suddenly, I found myself in a completely different place.
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The place where everything started.