Friday: 27 November
27th, I don't know how to feel about this date. It's the date I made things official, that Dancan and I have broken up. It's the date I finally sealed things with Travis. I really don't know how to feel about it.
It's been 2 months already since Trevis and I started dating, which actually feels like 2 years. I always tell myself that I wanna start things slowly but always end up rushing things.
Travis and I have talked things through on how things should go in our relationship. We've decided that weekends are ours.
...
I notice the weather has changed from sunny to cloudy as I walk out of work. Natasha is right besides me as we head to the bus terminals. I'm not wearing anything warm and the wind starts blowing some cold breeze. "Gosh I need to pass by Travis and see if he's got a jacket for me", I tell Tasha as we slow walk our way to the buses.
"Let's check him", she pulls my hand as we reach Travis workplace.
Earlier Travis and I had planned that I wait till he knocks off so we'll take the same bus home. His car had a breakdown last week so he wants to go check if his mechanic is handling things well.
"Hey", he greets as I approach, Tasha is on my tail.
"Man it's cold", I hug myself, rubbing my hands together. "Could you lent me your jacket?",
"I didn't bring it", he shrugs his shoulders.
"Hi", Natasha smiles at him as she joins us and he greets her back. I officially introduce them to one another then Tasha and I hend out.
"So?", Tasha asks as we walk our final steps to the bus terminal. "Are you still gonna wait or?",
"Yeah", I nod. "I feel like I have to",
Natasha heads to her bus section and I queue at mine. As I wait Lenny walks by.
"Hey short stuff",
"Really?", I laugh at what he calls me. "Short stuff?",
"What", he laughs. "But you are short so-",
"I'm only shorter than you", I shrug my shoulders with a smile.
"Are we leaving", he gesture at the bus which is already on platform.
"I'll take the next one",
"Waiting for bae huh?", he laughs.
"Yeah", I blush.
"I'll wait with you, this one already looks full",
We chitchat as we wait for the next bus. He tells me all about his girlfriend and what he wants to buy her. I listen and smile to all his story and then I spot Travis walking down the steps.
Our bus drives closer, we climb in and as Lenny takes a seat next to me I kindly tell him that I'll sit with my boyfriend. "Oh boy, sorry I forgot", he laughs then heads back to the back seats.
I pull out my phone from my handbag and call Travis.
"Hey", he answers.
"Where you at?", I ask. I know very well where he's at.
"Bus terminals, decided to take the C bus", he replies. What? Now really. It could be his changed his mind because he saw me with Lenny or something. Which reminds me. Duncan would have walk over to make it clear that he's the boyfriend. He didn't want any guy talking to me and he made sure to let that be known.
"Oh alright", I couldn't hide my disappointment from my tone. I then turned to face the window and start digging through my bag for something I don't even know.
Within seconds Travis occupies the seat next to me. I pull out my earphones while facing the window and plug them in my ears. I turn facing forward and that's when I see him.
"Damn, I must be so good at acting. Though I don't act at all times", he says. "You mean you really didn't see me when I walked down the steps?", he must have seen me when I glanced at him I guess.
"I didn't", I shake my head holding in a laugh.
"You must have been really busy flirting with that boyfriend of yours", he says.
"Oh wow", I laugh. He's jealous.
The bus ride feels short and in no time we're off the bus, walking to his grans place. We chill for a while then he later walks me home. Work has been shit for him these past few days and he's super tired right now.
"I have to go", he says as we stand right infront of my house gate.
"Why don't you come in for a while?",
"I can't, what if your dad sees me or something", he asks. He doesn't sound like he'll fall for my tricks today.
"He won't", I grab hold of his hand with pleading eyes.
"No", he shakes his head. "I'm going to my mum's and when I come back I'll pick you up so we'll sleep at my gran's",
I shrug my shoulders letting him go.
By 9:30 PM he comes back. And before that he did call to remind me to pack an overnight bag. I've changed my outfit to a grey jogger and a crop top.
I walk out to find Travis waiting. I hand him my bag and we walk to his gran's under a full beautiful moon.
We get to his grans and we chill on the couch in eachothers arms. "Look at this one", he laughs as he shows me his crazy funny videos on his phone. Theres no tv so we're responsible for entertaining one another. We've even got to a point were we feel a tv isn't important anymore, though he does miss his series and tv shows. My phone is on the table and I'm playing my favorite songs. After the videos he talks none stop about his life while growing up, and then suddenly his voice fades as I doze off.
Around midnight, I mean it feels like midnight, I feel my body being picked up, carried in a bridal style way. I know its Travis so I don't panic thinking I'm having a crazy terrible dream or something. Cause really if I'm dreaming, means I'm dead and my soul is finally crossing over. Anyway, good thing I'm concious and I know I'm being picked up by Travis.
He walks to the bedroom and gently place me on his bed, then removes my clothes. I act like I have no idea what's happening and let him undress me cause that to me, is being romantic, and I like romantics.
Spending my nights at Travis's are the best. My brains could fuck me up and bullshit me all the time making me think that some nights aren't the best but really, thinking back at them, they seem like the best nights I could ever ask for.
...
Saturday: 28 November
I got paid...
I'm in a happy mood. But who wouldn't, knowing their bank account has money? The whole sleepover thing with Travis puts me in a good mood. We didn't have sex last night and he didn't get mad over it.
I remember while in High school doing grade 10 when I dated a guy named Stephen, whom everybody called Monk. He had a weird sharp nose which almost looked English and was lighter than me in complexion. I don't know, I guess I have a thing for light skin guys. He didn't go to our school so the only time we got to see eachother was after school. Monk was a bit matured than me by that time. He wanted everything that comes with a romantic relationship. I was a dumb naive girl and obsessed with romance. So one day I finished classes earlier than usual and Monk finally invites me to his house. I was excited and nervous but smart enough to promise myself that if he wants sex I'm not gonna allow it. So, getting to his house we chill in the living room and he makes me lunch. After eating he starts romancing me, getting me worked out for sex. Sadly I wasn't falling for it, and I wasn't gonna fall for it since it scared me to death to have a dick in my pussy.
As we kiss and all that, I let Monk carry me to bed. He started undressing me and that's when I panicked.
"Oh no, please", I snapped, breathing heavily. Not from the heated weird kiss we had going on but from nerves and cowardness. "Please what?", he asked taking in that fact that I was pushing his chest back. "I'm not that kind of girl", I said. He frowned, confused or irritated from what he knew I was gonna tell him. "What's that supposed to mean?", he asked. "I'm not gonna have sex with you, I don't do that",
For my age I was really dumb, I know that now. I shouldn't have went to his house from the get go.
He got up and got dressed, taking all the words I just said in. He didn't look too happy. He looked really mad. So foolish of me, when we went to his house I asked if he'd add some few coins for my transportation money since home is 45 minutes drive away from his hometown. Man, I didn't know how to act taken he wasn't happy about my selfish move.
After getting dressed we both walked out of the house, him walking me to the taxi rank. He actually was nice enough to give me transportation money even though he didn't get what he wanted. But, that was the day I last saw him. The day we stopped talking and that's when I met Edwin.
Saturdays are my salon days, so after work I head there for a haircut. It's around town, a walking distance from my workplace.
"Hey beautiful", I'm greeted by Forrest, my hairstylist, as I step in the salon doors. It's a bit of a full house and queuing isn't my intentions.
"My guy", I smile as I greet back.
"Been waiting for you", he says. I don't know what he's talking about but I decide to play along.
"Told you I'll be here", I reply.
"Yeah", he smiles. "You did", he dust the hair off the guy he was busy with. "Come have a seat", he taps the chair that the guy he was with just left. Oh my word I'm too happy. I've jumped a couple of people waiting for their turns before me. Man, it feels good to have friends and be known.
I'm almost done with my haircut when Travis calls. "Hello",
"Where are you?", he asks. He sounds like he has knocked off and in a busy place.
"I'm at the salon getting a haircut", I reply.
"I'm with Sarki, so let me know when you're done", he says then hangs up.
I'm wondering what he's doing with Sarki, but that's a question for when I'm finally with him. After my cut I say goodbye to my friend and head to the taxi rank. I give Travis a call and let him know where I am. He tells me to wait up a few minutes as him and Sarki shop for whatever they're looking for.
I stand by the side so I won't disturb those trying to get home. As I wait, I keep looking if by any chance I'd see Duncan. I wanna call him but my brain tells me Nah, that'll be a dick move since Travis might pop up anytime soon. Two taxis get full and leave while still standing, waiting for Travis. I pull out my phone and call him.
"Dude, where the heck are you? I'm here still standing like some kind if lost fool", I whisper yell at him.
"Sarki and I are still shopping. Remember I told you his grandmother just died so he's buying a few things they'll need for the service", he says. I actually forgot about Sarki's grandmother. Plus I know when he's with Sarki they never stop shopping.
"Well, don't forget I'm still waiting, like some kind of fool", I stretch out the last part.
"I know", he replies and I hang up.
2 more taxis get full while still standing. I'm flipping out by now. I'm still hoping, nervous and wondering if Duncan would actually pass by and see me standing here. But at the same time I know he won't. He's not here. He's not around here. If I were waiting for him I'd still be pissed as much as I am right now.
I pull out my phone again, "look, have fun with your friend and don't let me disturb you. I'm leaving", I say.
"Nina please. He's getting a pair of sneakers, we already at the tills so we'll be right there",
"You've been saying that for an hour now", it's only been 30 minutes but the way town is so busy, taxi's are being filled too quick. The next taxi fills and drives off, that's when I decide I'm done. I've reached my limits of waiting so if Travia is serious he'll find me home. I step in the taxi and take a seat at the back seats. Within a few minutes it drives off. I light up my phone and text Wendy telling her how pissed I am. She actually manages to calm me down, telling me how stubborn I am in a not so nice way but, it did manage to calm me down.
I don't usually ask Wendy for advice but I thought just for a change I'd do just so.