Good mor-night. I said that when it's not really a word. Hahahaha. I just checked the time and it's just 2:18 AM.
By the way, it's Black Saturday now.
I know I'm writing on you too early but I just can't get all of these thoughts out of my mind. I started thinking about such stupid things. Will you still listen? I might say sensitive stuffs and end up offending people so I'm very grateful to have you. I know this will sound crazy but I hope you won't get mad at me.
I told you that I'm agnostic and is still asking about a lot of things right? Although I read about other gods and goddesses stories, I found them beautiful and wonderful. The lessons, the purity, the dark past. And yet we, who are alive, will never get to know the real history.
I also told you that I'm a Catholic right? Truthfully speaking, I'm not a fond of religions. I've met people who are in other religions and they taught me something that's very life-changing.
You see, sometimes you'll come across with someone from this specific religion and they have this attitude where they'll pursue you to join their religion and if you don't, you'll be identified as a dark soul. Sometimes it is being taught by the adults that this certain religion have this negative behavior and you'll grow up believing that all of them, who are inside the circle, are the same without getting to know who they really are.
Growing up, I started to think that everybody is really the same. That we all have these sides, those different sides that we show and hide to the public. Those masks that we keep just to feel belonged in the society. That I am the same as her, as she is the same as him.
Despite of all the similarities we have, there is always a one aspect in each of us that will differ us to everyone. That not because you're inside of a group doesn't mean you have one mindset. I've read a quote in the past and it says,
"People are born to never understand each other."
May not be the exact words but that's how I remember it.
Overthinking it, hahaha, I realized that we really can never understand one another. It is not the mind that's being the barrier, it is the way of how someone feels. We can understand their actions, how they convey the messages, but what we'll never get is how they feel about it. We might have experienced what they are experiencing right now but that doesn't mean that what we felt that time is what they are feeling. We can have the same thoughts but we cannot have the same kind of strength to handle such emotions that are dwelling in each of us. Oh- wait, I just got out of the topic. I'm going astray to what I was originally talking about.
Let me go back a little. Hahaha.
I met someone a while back when I was staying somewhere a bit concealed due to family matters. We have different beliefs and different names on how we address God. At first, we didn't know that we were different. I tend to assume that maybe everyone is in the same group as me. And if they're not, I'll stay away before bad events follow. We became friends, we spent time together and are always talking about our common interests. We were both so in love with the atmosphere that we forgot about the world. Until my mom and that person's mom met.
That's when we knew that we belong in the different lineage. I am here and that person is there. Our parents told us to stay away from each other because they thought things are being too good that it might turn sour in the worst possible way. Somehow, we became distant to each other. We ended up leaving the memories, the smiles, those happy times, those laughters in the past, all forgotten. Thinking that maybe from the very start, we were never meant to meet.
But why did we? Is there a specific reason as to why must we meet people who can mean so much to us but then lose them without even saying goodbye?
What is even good in 'goodbyes' when you're no longer going to see them afterwards?
I feel a bit refreshed now after writing on you. Thank you very much for listening.
Your friend,
TSM