I lowkey missed the private jet because customs was a nightmare coming back because I had luggage this time round. When I finally got out; I was greeted again by the same driver as the first time. I was so grateful because I could barely afford the uber to Axels. The entire experience though felt like déjà vu "Hey Simon", I greeted him sheepishly. He gave me a nod with a slight smile and then proceeded to open my door.
He had noted that I had less luggage this time with just a suitcase and a duffel, He also he did not ask me any questions, for which I was grateful for. I slid in and allowed my music to calm me. The weeknd crooned in my ears and i knew i would be alright no matter what.
When we arrived; Axel was waiting. Simon opened my door and I walked out towards him.
I had forgiven Axel like my mom had advised me to do, but the shadow of pain was still in my heart. I just did not care about him or his shitty family. He looked tired his eyes seemed to have faded a bit.
He had dark circles and faint wrinkles on his face. It tugged at my heart a bit. After all he was my father even though he was a selfish prick.
"Alexandrite", he breathed my name in a controlled manner. I eyed him sceptically and the nodded. Then he took me by surprise, and I am sure he was just as shocked by what he did next. He wrapped his arms around me in an embrace.
I reluctantly hugged him back and felt his body relax a bit. In that moment I realised that I had no idea when the last time was that I had hugged my father. It was probably when I was still a toddler. I took a step back feeling a bit awkward after that abrupt hug, he smiled at me. Wordlessly he led me inside. I had missed some school, but I was not phased.
Christoph had been keeping me up to date since we had the same subjects. He had reached out to me when I had been home with my mom and we chatted a bit and got to know each other.
The distraction of school had helped immensely because the depression had started to creep onto me as well from my mother. Having nothing to do and just waking up everyday was
But when I saw him, I didn't know what to do.
He slowly shuffled towards me as if I were a dangerous animal and he didn't know how to approach. He then gave me a hug. I was stunned by that action since i had always pegged him as an emotionally unavailable douche. Nonetheless I was warmed by his gesture. Jade just waved and gave me a warm genuine smile.
I waved back. Allison just ignored me which caused me to smile. She probably thought I was overrated. I was about to give her the finger and was interrupted by Chris who elbowed me in the ribs with a knowing smile.
I shrugged and he laughed. Maybe this place could home in the interim. While I wait for mom to get out of rehab.
On the first day of school, I rode with Chris in his matte black Hummer H3. He was quiet the whole way to school. I followed him wordlessly when we arrived. People kept greeting him, like a true douche he knew a lot of people and was very popular. I rolled my eyes.
They all stared at me quizzically and made me feel like the outsider I was. Their prying eyes followed me as I followed Chris who was directing me to my homeroom class.
I was grateful that the teachers did not acknowledge me at all as I attended all my lessons. Lunch time finally came which I had been dreading because of the seating situation and the clicks that I had witnessed earlier. Being the new girl, I did not quite know where to go. I sat at an empty table hoping that someone would savem me from the embarrassment of having to endure lunch hour alone.
To my relief Chris came and joined me. With his arrival, came his douchey friends to joining my table. I felt better, it took the pressure off me, but they would speak to Chris but not me. Classic teenage bullshit, they didn't want me to forget for a moment that I was an outsider. As if my presence bothered me. Fuck it I thought to myself. I am alright I don't need them. After a week of this pettiness, I decided I would rather sit by myself.
"Hey loner", Chris said to me in greeting as I was sitting by myself. "Hey there Billy", I responded. Using his nickname that I had given him which was, hill billy because his girlfriend was of southern descent and she sounded like a southerner.
She was charming enough until she felt like she was threatened by you.
"Why aren't you with the squad?", he drawled in a lazy tone. I looked him once over. I had had an assignment to finish early so I had left with the limo driver earlier than him. I was wearing grey from my sweater to my sweatpants and socks and sandals.
Chris on the other hand was rocking a denim look. His hair was gelled back with a fade on the sides. He paired his denim shirt and jeans with white Yeezy 360 boosts. "Nah, I'm just going to lone it, from here on. I like just listening to music. Never was really a people person at my old school."
He looked into my eyes then sighed. Then he pulled me into him as if he was going to hug me and then he roughed up my afro. I tried to step on his toes, but he just lifted me off the ground. I started laughing at his foolery.
Chris was just extra in his silliness, but he made my life. "Okay see you at home", he said before walking away. He waved turning his back to me. I threw my apple at him. He just laughed and then continued back to his mates.
That weekend marked the first 30 days of mom being in rehab. I went home and sat on my ledge in my room. I had memorized the number while I had been waiting for this day. Dialling the number from memory I called her.
She was allowed the phone call if she passed this first milestone. Joshua had told me it was the hardest. I held my breath as the phone trilled and waited for her to pick up. If she did not then something had gone wrong.
After a short eternity she picked up, but she was sounding distracted and distant which tore at my heart.
"What have you been up to? It looks like a resort, Jo I'm so jealous of you right now," I pushed the words out of my mouth past the lump that was in my throat. I was testing her a bit by calling her by her name. Usually whenever I did this she would scowl and remind me of my position as a child.
"It is quite scenic. Yeah", she croaked.
Tears now rolled down my cheeks maybe putting her there had an opposite effect I know it must be hard for her, but she sounded worse than when she left.
"Listen baby, I need to go lay down so we will have to end the call now, baby," she murmured. We had not even spoken for a minute. I furiously rubbed the tears off my face.
"Sure mommy, I love you". I told her.
"I love you soo much Alexandrite, I know I sound weird but it's all part of the process," she said to me in a strangled voice.
I just nodded. "Yeah ", I said hanging up.
I had so many pent-up emotions and frustrations and needed a stress reliever so that weekend Chris and I began going on these early morning jogs. They helped me feel alive. I did not want to join a cross fit here because I thought it would be pointless since I was not going to be here long.
It would also feel like I was cheating on my mom since it was something that we did together.
We had a routine we would wake up and grab an energy drink from the kitchen and then just go. We ran in comfortable silence.
Jade seeing my newfound relationship with Chris would try and have girls bonding days with Allison and I but Allison wouldn't say a word until I was away from them. Fuck it I thought. I would rather let them bond than disrupt them.
My involvement in their activities was straining her relationship with her daughter. I appreciated her effort, but I had no desire to ruin their bond.
After about two months I started joining the family for dinners. Chris and I would joke around while Jade, Allison and Axel had polite conversations.
Axel would join in on Chris and I occasionally. At first, I would shut down for the remainder of the dinner when he spoke to me. The tension would build and make everyone uncomfortable but after a while I let things go and would joke around with him.
I guess it was not all that bad.