WARNING: Implied sexual content.
~*~
When he lay eyes on Zenith, Theo's heart twisted. The knight was hunched in the lower bunk, hair falling in tangled curtains around his face. With his armor gone, revealing the white tunic he wore underneath, he seemed impossibly small and vulnerable.
Shuddering all over, Zenith lifted his head. As his hair shifted, it revealed wild, haunted eyes like those of a cornered animal. The pain stabbed sharper at Theo's heart, driving the breath from his throat.
Though part of him wanted to run away, Theo made himself step inside. Darkness blanketed the room when he shut the door, broken only by the dim globe-fish at the ceiling and the watery blue light rippling from the crystal on the desk.
"Theo," Zenith said, his voice a hoarse whisper.
Theo swallowed, sweat trickling down the back of his neck. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was intruding, but at the same time, he had to talk to Zenith. The horrible images flashed through his head again – Zenith on the floor with bloodstained knuckles, a battered Victor behind him.
Before he could stop himself, a shudder raced down his spine. He regretted it when Zenith breathed in sharply and whipped his head to the side.
No, he wasn't afraid of Zenith. He'd never be. He just...hadn't expected any of this to happen. Funny how just a few hours ago, he'd been fretting so hard about whether or not to confess his feelings. Now it couldn't be the furthest thing from his mind.
"Zenith," he said, trying to keep his voice gentle. "How are you feeling?"
Zenith twitched, but didn't answer. Instead, he wrapped his arms tight around his torso, though it couldn't hide how his shoulders were trembling.
By now, Theo had reached the bed. Gathering his nerves, he sat down beside Zenith. Zenith went stiff, but made no move to get up, and that relieved Theo a little.
"Um, so," Theo said, linking his hands in his lap. "Do you wanna tell me what happened? I promise I'm not mad at you, I just – "
"It's fine if you are." When Zenith's voice drifted to his ears, Theo jolted in surprise. Though he'd spoken, the knight still wasn't facing him; instead, he leaned his head against the cabin wall and pressed a hand over his face.
Unconsciously, Theo scooted closer. "Zenith," he began, but Zenith went on talking.
"You have every right to be angry. I behaved in a manner completely unbecoming of a knight and your familiar."
Though still quiet, his voice grew more ferocious with every word. The fury trembling in it stung like a bitter wind, even if Theo knew none of it was aimed at him.
"I know, but I – I mean, I wanna know why. It's not like you, you know? Do you really hate Victor that much?"
All this time, Theo'd had no idea. He knew that Victor hated Zenith – oh, how he knew – but he'd never imagined the feeling might be mutual. Until today, he hadn't even thought Zenith was capable of hatred.
Though maybe he should've gotten a hint from how vehemently Zenith had protested allowing Victor and Mirage on board. And judging from Mirage's ranting in the infirmary, it seemed Zenith had started this whole thing by accusing them of plotting to betray the crew.
To be fair, Theo could see where Zenith was coming from with that. It wasn't like he hadn't entertained the possibility himself. But to think it would drive the ever-righteous knight to pick a fight?
"Forgive me, Theo." Zenith's voice, low and wretched, knocked Theo out of his thoughts. He was still leaning against the wall, face hidden and shuddering all over.
"It's okay," Theo said quickly. Taking a chance, he reached for Zenith's arm. Zenith stiffened but didn't shake him off, so Theo decided to scoot a little closer to him.
"I don't...hate him," Zenith mumbled. "It would be wrong of me. My liege accepted him as a member of this crew. So I must accept him as well."
"But you still have your own feelings about it, right? And I get it, you don't have to like him. It's not like you guys have the best history or anything." Which was putting it mildly, to say the least.
"He is still your brother. I shouldn't have...."
"It's fine, okay?" Theo squeezed Zenith's arm. "It's already in the past. Victor wasn't hurt too bad, and you won't do it again. Right?"
Breathing out, Zenith slid his hand down from his face. "No. I will not."
"Then – then it's all good." So Theo said, but he couldn't stop his voice from shaking. "And in the end, you were just worried about the rest of us, weren't you? Victor has betrayed us before. It's only smart not to trust him. It's just that, you know, outright antagonizing him isn't going to help...."
He was babbling and he knew it, yet he couldn't figure out what else to say. Were there any words that would make things right? Because the truth was, while Zenith had a right to his feelings – and maybe he was even correct about them – Theo still wanted to believe in Victor. He couldn't forget what Victor had told him, how he'd chosen to betray the Infernal Legion for the sake of someone important.
He had seemed dead serious back then, or maybe Theo was only seeing what he wanted to see. All the same, Victor hadn't caused the crew any trouble yet. He didn't even seem too upset about what had happened, brushing off all of Theo's attempts to apologize.
Hard to believe this was the same man who had once sliced off Zenith's arm. Didn't that mean Victor really had changed?
But right now, with Zenith so miserable, Theo didn't know how to begin explaining. All he could do was sit by Zenith's side, awkwardly stroking his arm. Zenith stayed still, neither accepting nor rejecting his touch.
After a while, Theo started to feel like he had to say something. So clearing his throat, he struggled for the right words. "Well, um, it's like...from now on, well, I won't tell you to get along with him. You don't have to. Just...just understand we all have the same goal now, and we've got to work together. I haven't forgiven Victor either, and I'll keep up my guard around him. Okay? So you don't have to worry, Zenith."
He lowered his head, face burning. What kind of nonsense was he spewing?
When the bed creaked beside him, his head snapped back up. His heart jolted when he saw Zenith facing him for the first time. Though his hair still covered half his face, his visible eye was dull and weary. "I know, Theo. I was being unreasonable."
"I said your feelings weren't unreasonable, didn't I?" Before he could stop himself, Theo reached out and gently brushed the hair out of Zenith's eyes, tucking the stray locks behind his ear. "Look, I'm always here for you. If anything's bothering you, you can tell me."
"Theo." Zenith's eyes widened and his lips trembled. Like this, he seemed younger and more vulnerable than ever, making a painful lump swell in Theo's throat. "I...I am fine. Nothing...is wrong. Not anymore."
"Are you sure?" Dimly, Theo realized his hand was still on Zenith's face, fingers curving around his cheekbone. "If there's something I can do for you – "
"I...nothing...nothing is...." Zenith's voice choked off in a gasp when a violent shudder gripped his body. Heart pounding, Theo leaned closer.
"Zenith!"
When Zenith looked back at Theo, his eyes were wild. He lifted trembling hands, though couldn't seem to bring himself to touch Theo. "If – if I may...there is...just one thing. Please...your Levia."
"My Levia?" Theo's heart flipped.
"Yes. Please, let me – if I could only feel it, then maybe, maybe it will...give me...comfort. I may not deserve it, but I still...."
At last, his hands found Theo. They clamped down on Theo's shoulders, fingers digging in tight, then pulled him so close their chests bumped. Like this, Theo became exquisitely aware that their noses were less than an inch from touching.
His heart throbbed so loud he thought Zenith surely must be able to hear it. All the blood in his body was rushing to his head. "W-wait," he began.
"Please." Zenith's plaintive whisper prickled across his skin.
This was all so sudden. And would it really help? It wasn't like Zenith was low on Levia or anything....
But he wanted this, wanted it enough to beg. If it really would comfort him, even in the smallest way, then Theo didn't have a choice.
So he gripped the front of Zenith's tunic and leaned closer. Zenith bent down toward him, and their mouths brushed. The soft pressure of Zenith's lips jolted through Theo's entire body.
Then Zenith pushed down, his lips molding tight around Theo's. His hands clamped around Theo's back as if trying to sink into his skin. Theo gasped into Zenith's mouth, and Zenith took the opportunity to plunge his tongue inside.
As their tongues rubbed against each other, sparks flashed in Theo's vision. He let it all go – all thought, all feeling, all doubt – and returned the kiss just as eagerly.
And again, and again, until Theo lost track of how many times. The soft, wet smacks of their lips meeting, their gasps and sighs, filled every inch of the cabin. With each kiss, the Levia flowing between them brightened and sharpened. A stream of mingled pink and white light, blending into a gentle glow like the first rays of dawn.
When Theo pulled out of their latest kiss, his lips were tingling and not an inch of his body wasn't on fire. Somehow, he had ended up on top of Zenith, straddling his familiar's hips. Zenith gazed back up at him, hair spilling across the sheets and a brilliant blush painting his cheeks.
As Theo bent down for another kiss, Zenith suddenly pushed on his shoulder. Confused and dismayed, Theo stopped, but his heart slammed violently when Zenith yanked up the hem of his tunic.
As he revealed his smooth, toned torso, he tugged Theo down close. Theo gasped when his nose bumped Zenith's skin.
"Please, Theo," Zenith whispered in his ear. "Give it to me. More...."
"Are...are you sure?" Theo stammered, barely able to hear his own voice above his racing heartbeat.
"Yes. I want it. All of you."
No way. This couldn't be real, could it? But that was Zenith's voice in his ear, Zenith's grip around his neck, Zenith's hot skin beneath his face. And he wanted this. Something only Theo could give to him.
Theo felt like his chest was about to explode. Whether from joy or terror, he didn't know or care.
His own words echoed in his ears. 'Aren't you overthinking it? You like Fia because they're Fia.'
And it was the same for him and Zenith, wasn't it?
"Zenith," Theo gasped, hardly able to believe the words coming from his mouth. "I love you."
His head whirled, his heart raced. There. He'd said it. Now he could never take it back.
When Zenith stiffened beneath him, muscles pulling taut, dread knifed through Theo's chest. But then his grip tightened and he yanked Theo into a kiss so he deep he felt like he was drowning.
And he was drowning, wasn't he? In Zenith's hot breath, in his blazing Levia. In the warmth of his body. And in his overflowing trust and gratitude.
What could you call this besides love?
As their kiss deepened, Theo slid his hands down Zenith's heaving sides, feeling the muscles ripple beneath his fingertips. Zenith groaned into his mouth, his breath tickling Theo's tongue. The sensations overwhelmed him, wiped all remaining thought from his mind.
Fine by him. They didn't need to think anymore, either of them. Not when they were pressed skin to skin, moving together in such a perfect rhythm Theo almost couldn't tell where he ended and Zenith began. And that was just the way he wanted it.
Like this, they were finally connected. Not just in body, but soul as well.