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What She Always Longed For.

🇿🇦Steadyskatie
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Synopsis
All Zee ever imagined was living a thrilling, dangerous love story—a gangster husband, dodging bullets like in her wildest night dreams. But when that fantasy became her reality, it unearthed the dark secrets of her childhood, unraveling her world and leaving her hopeless. Just when she thought she was lost, the mysterious man from her dreams revealed himself, bringing light back into her life. ~~~ His tongue wasn’t just inside me—it was teasing, rubbing against my clit, moving in and out with deliberate precision. I couldn’t control my moans anymore, my body trembling under his touch. I grasped his head, desperate for more, but he only teased me further, keeping me on edge. “You know the rules, babe. Not until I say so,” he murmured, his voice muffled as he buried himself between my thighs. “Lloyd,” I gasped, my voice barely above a whisper. “Tell me you can hold it for daddy.” “I can’t, baby,” I panted, my moans breaking through uncontrollably. “Then tell me you love this,” he demanded, his voice thick with lust—deep, commanding, and utterly intoxicating. “You know it’s amazing, love,” I breathed, my own voice unrecognizable, heavy with pleasure. He rewarded my confession with a long, deep thrust of his tongue that sent a cry ripping from my throat. Every muscle in my body tensed, anticipation coiling inside me like a tight spring. He smirked against my skin, his voice a husky whisper. “I love it when you cum on my tongue. I just can’t get enough of your taste.” Reaching for the pillow beside my head, he slid it beneath my pelvis, lifting me into the perfect arch. He took his time, savoring me, his tongue circling my clit with agonizing slowness. Then, he slid a finger inside me, moving it with expert precision, teasing, building the pressure. Shifting, he moved up my body, his hands parting my legs further as we adjusted to our sides, limbs tangled in a slow, sensual rhythm. His hard length rubbed against me, the friction sending jolts of pleasure through my core. I had always believed pleasure should come with a little pain, but this… this was something else entirely. Warning: This book contains explicit sexual and violent content. Reader discretion is advised.
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1

POV-Chris

As I saw her from a distance, I could tell she wasn't herself. Something was off. My eyes stayed fixed on her until she finally noticed me. The moment our gazes met, she ran into my arms, burying her face in my chest as if she had been longing for me.

She sobbed against me, her body trembling. I held her tighter, trying to comfort her, but it was as if her soul was shattering right in front of me. Seeing her like this hurt—I wanted nothing more than to take away her pain.

She was perfect. Everything I had ever dreamed of. Her beauty was unreal, but it was more than that. She made my soul feel alive. I silently thanked God for bringing her into my life because I knew she would be in my future.

I didn't want to leave her like I did last time. I wanted her to come with me, but she had come here with her friends.

"I'm sorry, I have to go," I said, my voice nearly breaking. I just wanted to hold her forever.

"So you're just going to leave like last time?" she asked between hiccups.

"I'm sorry, but you don't understand what I'm feeling. You never will," I admitted, rubbing her back gently. "It's beyond love—yes, love—but deeper than that."

"Then if it's beyond love, why are you leaving me here alone?" she whispered, struggling to control her tears.

I had no answer. She was right. If I truly felt this way, why was I walking away?

I pulled out my phone and texted Lloyd, instructing him to hack into her phone and send a message to her friends:

"Guys, I've left. Uncle wants me to visit my mom for the weekend."

She looked surprised, but then her lips curled into a soft smile, her face glowing with a warmth that made my heart race. She was breathtaking.

I placed my hands on her waist and gazed into her eyes, but she looked away, shy. I held my feelings steady. I wanted to kiss her—to make this moment unforgettable—but we were in the middle of a crowded mall.

Still, I leaned in closer, testing the waters.

When our lips met, she didn't respond. The hesitation stung. A wave of embarrassment washed over me.

I let go of her and turned, walking toward my car. But something in me refused to leave. I glanced back and saw that she hadn't moved an inch.

I wanted her to chase after me. To prove that this wasn't just one-sided.

But she didn't.

I clenched my jaw and turned around, walking back to her. Without a word, I lifted her into my arms, her legs wrapping around my waist, her hands gripping my neck.

"Don't fight the feeling," I whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her neck before sucking gently.

Still, she didn't respond.

What had they done to her? Who had hurt her so badly that she couldn't even accept love?

I had only spoken to her face-to-face twice, but I had known her for so much longer. I wasn't about to give up on her now. I loved her.

But how was I supposed to make her believe that?

I kissed up her neck, moving to her earlobe, and whispered, "You're hurting me."

"They've hurt me," she said, her voice breaking as she struggled to breathe.

I pulled back to look at her. I'm not them, I wanted to say, but I couldn't promise I'd never hurt her—I wasn't perfect.

Still, I knew I'd never intentionally break her heart.

She stared at me for a long moment, then, out of nowhere, she kissed me. Soft. Slow. I melted into her touch, cupping her ass gently.

"I love you," I whispered, setting her down.

I walked her to my car and opened the door. She slid in without hesitation.

As I started the engine, I played Late Night Drive by Yo Trane.

Her face lit up. "That's my favorite," she said shyly.

"I know," I smirked. "I'd go the extra mile for you."

"But how would you know?" she asked, tilting her head.

"I have my ways." I couldn't exactly tell her I had hacked her phone. She would freak out.

She looked at me, slightly surprised, but mostly intrigued.

To ease the tension, I leaned over and kissed her softly, resting my hand on her thigh as I pulled onto the highway.

She sang along to the song, her voice like a melody itself.

"Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go…

You decide if you're ever gonna let me know…"

As she sang, she turned to me and whispered, "I will never let go of you. You're my life."

I looked at her and smiled.

When we arrived at my place, I led her inside to my room.

She was nervous—I could see it in the way she fidgeted. She sat on the bed but kept glancing around, unsure what to do.

"Do you want anything? Food? Water?" I asked, trying to put her at ease.

"Juice would be great."

I left the bedroom and headed to the kitchen. As I grabbed the juice from the fridge, I also took out a tub of ice cream.

When I turned around, I nearly dropped everything.

She was sitting on the kitchen counter, staring at me in a way that sent a shiver down my spine.

"I would love to feel you, Chris," she murmured, her voice dripping with something dark and unreadable.

I swallowed hard. How the hell could she read my mind like that?

Instead of answering, I handed her the juice.

She sipped it slowly, her eyes still locked on mine.

I stepped closer and kissed her forehead, then lifted her into my arms and carried her to the couch.

I turned on the TV and put on Our Love.

She gave me a questioning look. "Really?"

"Just watch. The way they portray their love is amazing."

She seemed comfortable, but I wanted her to relax even more. I sat beside her, pulled her onto my lap, and let her rest her head against my chest.

Her body was warm against mine. Her hips pressed against me, and yeah, I felt everything.

"Are you comfortable?" I asked, already knowing she would tease me.

She smirked. "I can't say shit because I'm not near home, but I'll settle for this."

Instead of responding, I scooped some ice cream onto a spoon and fed her. She licked it off slowly, then turned her face toward mine.

"Don't you want my mouth to feed you too?" she asked.

I didn't hesitate.

I fed her another spoonful, then smirked. "Can you transfer that to me?"

She sat up, her body pressing closer to mine. Her hips moved slightly, teasing me. Then, she leaned in and kissed me deeply, the taste of chocolate lingering between us.

I groaned into her mouth, sliding my hands down to her waist, pulling her even closer.

We both moaned softly, completely lost in the moment.

Then—

SPLASH.

Water hit my face, snapping me out of it.

I blinked, dazed, to find Lloyd staring at me with an amused expression.

"Wake up, man. We're late. She's leaving today."

My head was spinning.

A dream. It was just a dream.

A wet dream…