I was this stupid gay boy afraid to kiss, my sister was gone, my mother was a silent slave and my Dad was a homophobe.... Wow...Summed up, I sounded like the "before" in a self help book.... but still a chance to become an "after" comes for everyone right ? but where was mine? Well at 7th Carnegie Street and I had just left it hanging behind like dirt while running home.... Wow, just wow...
I don't know when sleep came for me but when I woke up it was almost midnight... I came down the stairs to the dining room to find food with a note saying that mom had gone with aunt Jess to some pregnant friend's house because she was divorced and alone and mere days from her due date (so it just isn't me that the heaven shits upon huh ) and would be back in two days... she had kept packets of mac and cheese and also money to eat out and another note apologizing for the sudden emergency and a third note saying that dad won't be home from his business trip for a week or so... I smiled almost, at the prospect of having a judgement free home for 7 days.
I wasn't quite hungry so I picked up some chips and a book and sat by my bedroom window....I tried but I couldn't read, my mind recurred and stopped around Theo and his hurt eyes...so wounded...then Ashna came to my mind...
All Irish beauty....a ginger for crying out loud....her blue cornflower eyes full of emotion... her lips just like mine...she was a genetic lottery win and more importantly she was so happy all the time...hers was a face littered with signs of perpetual laughter earning her the name "Chuckle monkey" She was the only friend I needed, the only one I had and I was content... we would play and read and sing and laugh and the days would slip away quickly ... then one day dad found out.... about Lisa and her....and she ran away...she was 19 and I was 13, now I'm 18 and she's nowhere to be found... I can recall her echoing laughter and also her piercing cries... her red hot blush when I caught her and chalk pale face when dad did.... She looked disgusted of her dad's beliefs... but worse, she looked disgusted of herself.... Did Theo feel disgusted, did he feel unclean? Some mixture of anger and guilt and godknowswhat filled my heart...I wouldn't let that happen...I must tell him how he made me feel but how ? Then it hit me.... I hoped he would be there.... Tuesdays tomorrow, hmmm....
The night dragged by in a self induced insomnia and when it was finally morning, I stepped out... Jangling nerves and racing heart and many breaths all marching together to claim a boy...
Off to Claire's for Theo.
My Theo
My Theo?!?!?
My mind rejoiced as I spotted him through the glass door... He stood there at the counter talking to Lisa.... he looked sad but also angelic in a white shirt and shorts....I breathed and just stepped in... he was startled to see me, before he could say something, I just asked Lisa 'I'm in the store room Lisa, I need to have a really private conversation' She nodded. I looked at Theo and walked to the store room. He followed me. Once in, I locked the door, turning to him.
He just said 'I'm sorry Amias, I didn't know better. I shouldn't have...' and I stopped him from talking....kisskng him ruthlessly to piss over any notion of me being angry...I held the back of his head pulling him harder...His lips were soft, were warm and were on mine (Yayyyy).... I felt my erection rise... We were pushing into each other, trying to be as close as close can be, stumbling over some boxes...We kissed for god knows how long when he softly pushed me to break it off.... We breathed again... he was blushing and smiling and panting from the kiss... 'You are wrong Theo, you should have...again and again...' and I went at him again...this time gentler... when we broke off he said 'Can we go somewhere?' I said nothing, held his hand and pulled him outside. Lisa looked at us first in shock, then in joy, like a proud Mama.
'Oh lord, fix your hair boys. You look like you were wrestling' she said
'We never said that we weren't.' Theo said naughtily.
'Cheeky already, are we Mr. Newboy' she looked into the store room 'Holy Gaga, you devils!!!!! What were you doing? It looks like a gorilla went mad here.'
We blushed.
'As happy as I am for you. I'm a poor woman and this shop is all I have, so fuck your brains out elsewhere in the future'
'Lis.....' I eyed her angrily as Theo turned redder by the second.
'Ok ok....not so cheeky anymore eh, Mr. Newboy' she laughed.
We rushed out and Theo took me to his car. As we drove to my house... I turned to him seriously
'Theo....'
'Yes, Amias'
'Please put your other hand on the steering too'
He turned red. I chuckled.
We reached home in minures, Theo drove clear like a local... In my house we crashed about in the emptiness, kissing and grinding against each other.... kissing on each and every step.... climbing stairs while kissing is surprisingly tough.... somehow getting to my room, where I saw something new. He trashed his sweet, polite front to become this crazed beast... he pushed me onto my bed and covered me in himself...pinning my hands down strongly all the while kissing me like there's no tomorrow...
He was really, really hard....long too (insert wink) He rubbed himself against me till I was hard and hot and panting...He was worse off, biting my lips in a hungry kiss as he dry humped me and I turned into a puddle of intoxicated mush under him... he shuddered and came in his shorts, lying over me for minutes....We were breathing in sync...his exhale my inhale, his heartbeat and mine playing chase....
Passions fulfilled, we got up when he pointed at his ruined shorts and I gave him a clean pair of shorts as he apologized. That was it...ok maybe I laughed a little...ok I laughed a lot.... He blushed again adorably.... All cleaned up, he was again your day to day charming teenager not someone who would cloth-fuck a poor boy with his parents gone...well well...
As we came down the stairs, He turned to me 'Amias, my mom is like going out for a day or two.... so would you like to come to my house for a sleepover?'
'I have just let you kiss the oxygen out of me, I guess you can drop the "would" . Of course, I'd love to' He smiled....if that's supposed to be his reaction, he could have asked me to go to hell and I'd have nodded...God save my soul from this boy...
'Just let me ask my mom first' ...while I called my mom, he waited nervously... My mom said yes and he smiled like a kid on Christmas 'See ya then' with that he drove off.... He checked me out in the rearview mirror.... Ohh be still my heart.... I settled into my room...
When he was gone I realized the spontaneity of this...two days ago I was a boy hell-bent on avoiding human conversation, and today I am blushing like nobody's business....how? Why do I react to him like that? Why does he make me burn like a naked flare? So eager to tell him everything, give him everything? Who was he to have done that to me? I was confused but it was a good kind of confused...the kind which felt romcom...
But Theo wasn't a romcom, he was real, very real....like the pair of shorts I held...I fell to my bed and looked at it...a tiny white stain running across...I brought it to my nose and breathed him in....He was everywhere....a clear sea salt smell of lust...it was on the bed...on my skin...he was everywhere....Theo Sparks...
©Alexis Vane