They had been on this planet and in this cabin for fourteen days now. Kiy was still jumpy but not quite so, and Linx was wary to make physical contact beyond when they recharged.
Kiy felt Linx's emotions grow stronger, his fear, his guilt; just as he felt the distance between them grow. Kiy looked up and to his left, watching Linx carve out a sharp point on the end of a thicker branch to make a spear for fishing. As he worked Kiy watched him, watched his face of concentration as he watched the emotions dance behind his eyes. Kiy stood, setting his spear down, and made his way over the few feet and sat down next to Linx. He knew Linx was purposefully not hiding his emotions from him, sending them out in waves and pulling him in as if caught in the tide. "Hi," Kiy said, squinting against the sun.
Linx glanced over at him, his hand stilling, and gave him the barest smile. "Hey, mo croí."
"Can I come with you?" Kiy asked him almost unsure if he would grant his request.
"I'd love nothing more. After I finished this," he held up the spear the slightest bit, "I was going to go see if I could find some fruit of some kind beyond where we've searched so far. Maddox seems sure there are no other humans close by, and she's usually right about these things. Feel up for a bit of a hike? Might put some color back in your skin." Linx reached up and gently swiped his knuckle down Kiy's cheek, smiling when he didn't rear back in fear. "I love you, mo croí."
"I love you, too, Linx. I really do." Linx could see the anxiety written across his face, afraid he would no longer believe it.
"I know you do." Linx smiled at him reassuringly, wanting so badly to kiss him at that moment it was overwhelming.
Kiy looked at him, their eyes meeting before Kiy powered through any residual fear and leaned in, softly pressing his lips against that of his mate's. Within that kiss, Kiy felt the love they had always shared and realized he missed him more than he had known he had. As they broke apart, Kiy leaned in again, his head tilting downward to rest against Linx's chest, his arms circling his sides. Linx kissed the back of his neck, inhaling Kiy's unique scent and getting lost in it.
Linx looked up and smiled lightly as Maddox vanished into the cabin, her answering smile pulling at her lips. "We should get going if we want to try and find anything before it starts getting dark. You still wanna come with me?"
Kiy nodded and sat up. "Yes. If...if you wouldn't mind me going with you."
Linx grinned almost sadly. "I always want you with me." He glanced down at his hands. "I never wanna let you out of my sight again. I miss you, Kiy."
"I miss you, too." Kiy took a deep breath to stamp down the emotions he felt, both his own and Linx's.
Linx smiled, though there was deep sadness behind it. "Ready?"
Kiy nodded as they both stood. "Not gonna bring the spear?"
Linx looked at the weapon. "No. Should I?"
"Well, what if we find fruits at the tops of trees?" he opined.
"Ah." Linx turned and knelt, picking up another weapon that was to his right. "We have this."
Kiy smiled. "You made a bow?"
"I did. And some dulled arrows, as well as some sharp ones, mind. But the dull ones are for just that purpose." Linx smiled at him, bright and true. For a moment it seemed things were exactly as they should be between them, with no extra tension and no fear. Kiy smiled back. "Ready?" Kiy nodded and they began walking west. Into his communication device attached to his shoulder, Linx said, "We're going to look for fruit. Or what passes as fruit on this planet. I'll keep my com on if you need anything. You two do the same."
"Yes, sir."
"Yes, Colonel." Came the echoing replies.
They walked for three kilometers talking quietly and easily with each other before, "Linx?"
"Hm?"
"We...we're okay, right?" Kiy sounded anxious.
Linx looked to his right, his head angled slightly downward, squinting against the sun. "We're okay, Kiy." He half smiled and stopped when Kiy stopped.
"Really?" Kiy looked as anxious as he felt.
Linx stepped up to him, resting his forehead against that of his mate's. "We have to work back to where we were before this mess, Scarecrow. But yes, my love, we are okay."
Kiy lowly chuckled at the nickname and nodded. "Linx? Can I kiss you?"
"Please," Linx's voice cracked at the request, missing more than he was willing to admit that one simple act of affection. They kissed gently, but within it held the power it would take to keep them going.
They walked on. After another kilometer, they came upon a large, green bush with red berry-like fruits in bundles at the end of medium-sized branches that supported the weight. "Linx, look!" Kiy, in his excitement, ran ahead.
"Kiy, wait a minute," Linx called after him. In an instant, in his mind, he saw the reason for the bad feeling he had had the night before. But it was too late. Kiy popped two berries into his mouth and a bright flash of lightning stopped Linx in his effort to get to his lover, his hands coming up before his eyes to shield them.
Within his mind, he heard the sound of a woman speaking, but he saw nothing else but the bright flash. "In ninety days and ninety nights, what's wrong will be set right. The power of love heals. His pain, love will steal. Show him true and do not hinder or your lives together will be surrendered." As the voice died away so did the white light that blinded him. He blinked back the pain from his eyes and as his vision returned immediately looked to where he last saw Kiy. There was nothing there. No trace of him.
"Kiy!" he cried out for him, his heart racing. "Kiy, where are you?" He looked around, making his feet move around to the other side of the large bush. He saw nothing. He heard no noises. Even the indigenous wildlife and bugs seemed to have been silenced. Linx felt his heart being ripped apart. This couldn't be happening. Not again. He listened. There. To the left. He turned and saw a small hole in the face of a mountain, similar to a cave entrance. Something pulled him toward it and he didn't resist the pull. He entered the cave. Far above him, natural lighting appeared as he went, almost as if it were motion-activated, guiding him where he needed to go. He walked less than a half a click before the small corridor opened into a large room. He looked around, concentrating hard to find Kiy's energy signature. His eyes were drawn behind that of a large statue of a woman whose breasts were bared. Looking down toward the floor, Linx spotted something small. Slowly he walked around to get a clearer view. There, just behind the statue, was a young boy and a face he recognized just as surely as his own. He knelt to the boy's level. Linx could tell from his wide eyes and the way he curled in on himself he was scared and cold. He had on a pair of pants like what they'd been assigned at CTC and a white, short-sleeved shirt. "Hi, Kiy."
The boy began to cry. He was slightly younger than when he had been when they met, maybe a year; but clearly the same boy. "P-please don't hurt me."
"I'm not here to hurt you," Linx told him gently.
"You're not?" He wiped his eyes and sniffled.
"No. I'm here to protect you. You wanna come out from there?" He was shoved behind the statue and against the wall, squeezing into the smallest place he could wedge himself.
"I'm scared," he answered, wearily looking at Linx's outstretched hand.
"I know you are. But I won't hurt you."
"Everybody hurts me," the boy replied.
"I know. But not anymore." Linx kept his hand outstretched.
"How do I know you're telling the truth?" Kiy wiped his arm across his face, dispelling the tears.
"Feel that I'm telling you the truth." While they had all been trained as children how to better harness their own individual power, they were all born with it and knew how to utilize that power, if not control it.
Kiy did feel he was telling the truth. He felt such strong emotions of love and kindness coming from this man in front of him that he wanted so badly to take his hand. But he hesitated nonetheless. Finally, after realizing the emotional response wasn't a trick, slowly reached out his tiny hand to Linx. Linx helped the boy to his feet and with slight hesitation, Kiy lifted up his arms in a silent, yet pleading request to be picked up, to which Linx complied. With his arms wrapped around Linx's neck and his head resting upon his shoulder, they made their way to the front of the cave.
"Kiy, can you tell me how you ended up in the cave?" Linx asked softly as they made their way through it.
"I don't know. I just woke up there. I went to sleep in my bed and woke up there. And then I saw you." Linx nodded knowing he was telling the truth. He saw what Kiy did as his mind replayed the night before. Trying not to react to what Linx saw being done to him as it flashed through the boy's mind, Linx readjusted his grip on the boy, slightly lifting him before settling him back down against his chest. "I'm hungry," Kiy said, his voice sounding so small, so scared, that it pulled at his heart. He shrank inward, trying to curl up as if afraid he would be struck for commenting.
"I know, buddy. I'm hungry, too." Linx looked around as they exited the cave. It was almost dark. How long had they been in there? Into his comm, he spoke, "Maddox? Zim? Come in."
Instantly the comm came to life. "Colonel? Sir, where are you? We've been looking for you two for hours." Maddox sounded worried. He almost smiled. "We tried your comm, but only got static. Are you okay? Is Kiy okay?"
"We're fine, but Maddox...we've got a kind of a situation here that I'm...not sure how to figure out." He looked at the boy who was snuggled into his chest. "Where are you?"
"We just made it back to the cabin. We came back hoping you and Kiy beat us back here."
"Alright stay put. Get some food cooking. We'll be there soon." Linx looked at the boy again and kissed his forehead. It was an impulse he couldn't resist.
"Colonel, what's the situation?" That was Zim. He knew Zim would be waiting on his command to act.
"Uh... it's a bit hard to explain, Zim. We're both okay. We'll be there soon."
They continued for a while in silence before, "Is your name Colonel?"
Linx chuckled a moment. "No. My name is Linx."
"Then why did they call you Colonel?" The boy lifted his head from Linx's shoulder, his expression curious.
"That's my rank. But you can just call me Linx, okay?"
The boy nodded. "You're not like other colonels I've known." His voice took on a melancholy note and he dropped his eyes, his face falling.
"I know, mo corí." Linx stopped walking to look at him. "Hey." He gently ran his knuckle down his cheek and the boy looked up, his eyes shining. "You don't have to worry about that anymore okay? No one will hurt you." The boy sniffled and nodded. Linx continued walking. Just over halfway the boy started to squirm. "You want down?"
The boy nodded. "I have to pee." Linx set him down. And he began to walk to the edge of the tall grass.
"Kiy, don't go too far in there. Stay where I can see you, please."
"Okay, Linx," Kiy replied as he went to the edge of the tall grass.
Linx looked around, trying to see anything or any potential dangers that may be lurking. When he turned back, Kiy was gone. Linx's heart stopped mid-beat, his breath catching in his throat. "Kiy?" He heard nothing. "Kiy!" he called a bit louder.
"Linx!" There he heard it. The boy sounded weak. Kiy bolted to where the boy had stood only moments ago, looking around where he should have been. Linx spotted drag marks through the grass and followed it. With his heart beating ever faster he called for the boy again and twice more before he finally came upon him. "Linx, help me!"
Linx wasted no time. He pulled out the hunting knife he kept on his belt and began cutting away multiple vines that were wrapped solidly wrapped around the boy's torso, arms, legs, and neck. "Hang on, baby. Kiy, I need you to be still, okay. Quit fighting it, it's only making it tighten." The boy looked panicked. "Just hold still, okay." Linx cut the boy free in a frenzied panic, trying to remain calm so as to not cut the boy or frighten him further. When he was finally free of the tethers of the plant that had him, he lifted the boy safely into his arms, cut a tether that was beginning to wrap around his ankle, and ran back onto the path they had previously been walking. The boy screamed when he tried to set him down, utterly terrified now to let Linx go. "I know, baby, I know. But let me look at you." Reluctantly the boy let go and Linx set him down.
"Are you hurt anywhere?" Linx lifted the boy's chin to look at his throat. It was red and irritated, but otherwise, there was no visible damage. "Kiy, baby, I need to look at your stomach and back, okay. Can I do that?" The boy nodded slowly. Linx lifted his shirt and felt around the reddened skin to see if perhaps there was anything under the surface he could feel leftover from the plant. "Turn around." He checked his back as he did his front. "I'm gonna pull up your pants legs, alright, so I can make sure your legs are okay." Again the boy nodded. Linx tried as best he could to fight off the rage he felt as he saw the flashes from the boy's past as Kiy remembered them. "Alright, there doesn't seem to be anything embedded under your skin." He looked at the boy closely. Beyond fright, the boy looked fine. "Are you okay?" The boy nodded again.
"I'm sorry. I didn't go past the grass like you said not to. I didn't disobey." He took a shuddering breath. "Those things just came out and grabbed me and pulled me in there. I'm sorry. Don't be mad."
"Hey, hey, easy. I'm not mad. I know you didn't go in there. Take a breath for me. One more. Good. Easy, easy. Kiy, baby, I'm not going to hurt you, okay? Not for anything." The boy nodded and when Linx stood, reached his arms up to be carried. Linx complied with a smile.
Ninety minutes later they arrive back at their found cabin. Maddox and Zim were waiting outside on a crude bench. "Look," Zim said, lightly tapping her arm with the back of his hand.
Maddox looked up from making another spear. "What the hell?" They stood as a unit and met their leader in the middle. "Kiy?" Maddox said in astounded disbelief as she saw the face of the boy she once knew. Who she had watched grow and become the man he was only hours previous.
Kiy didn't respond but shyly hid his face in Linx's shoulder. "Linx, what's going on?" Zim remained quiet, observing.
"I'm not really sure. Let me feed him and once he's asleep I'll fill you in. Zim, did you catch anything today?"
"Yes. There's plenty of fish in there." As a group, they entered the cabin.
"Kiy, let me set you down here so I can get you something to eat." The boy shook his head and reaffirmed his grip.
"I'll get it," Maddox volunteered. "Just stay with him." Maddox returned moments later with a heaping pile of cooked fish on a carved wooden plate, with carved utensils.
"Thank you." To Kiy he said, "Here, baby, eat. It's okay. They'll protect you as I would." The boy turned slightly in Linx's lap and began to slowly eat. Maddox and Zim also made themselves a plate and began eating also. There was no conversation to be had and when Kiy was done, he leaned heavily into Linx, his eyes drooping. "Tired, baby?" The boy nodded. "Alright." He kissed the boy's temple. "Let's go lay you down so you can sleep. You've had a long day, huh?" The boy nodded again and Linx stood, taking him into the room where they had been sleeping.
"Don't leave me," Kiy asked, his eyes instantly watering.
"I won't be far. Just where we just were. All you have to do is yell for me and I'll be right here, okay." The boy nodded, tears falling. Linx gently wiped them away. "You want me to stay until you fall asleep?" he asked remembering how often he did that as children. The boy nodded again and Linx laid out beside him, Kiy instantly rolling half on top of him, and his eyes sliding closed.
When Linx appeared from the room, looking tired and worn out, he collapsed onto the couch and wearily rubbed his face. "Linx...what happened out there?" Maddox asked, her voice tense and full of worry. She glanced back down to the doorway where Kiy lay sleeping beyond.
"We found some of what looked like berries. Kiy went over and ate some." He frowned. "Here." He reached into his satchel and handed her a few of the berries they'd found. She held the berries a moment before her eyes widened.
"How many of these did he eat?" She set them down on a nearby table carved from a tree trunk. "Don't anyone eat these."
Linx frowned. "I'm not sure how many he ate. I wasn't standing right beside him. But after he ate them, there was a bright flash of light and I heard a woman speak. She said, 'in ninety days and ninety nights, what's wrong will be set right. The power of love heals. His pain love will steal. Show him true and do not hinder or your lives together will be surrendered.' What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Linx looked to Maddox, his features full of worry and concern.
Maddox went over the words in her head, a slight frown pulling down her brow. "It's only conjecture, but maybe it means he'll stay in this state for ninety days and nights. He was...what...not quite six... when placed with us...he looks about six or seven now...what he went through before he came to us has...always been pretty close to his mind...what happened on that planet brought it all back and then some...maybe this is your opportunity to show him that not all adults will hurt him and that he's loved. Maybe this is your chance to heal the child within him and while you're doing that, healing this most recent...pain...the last part...honestly, I don't know if that means he'll die if that doesn't happen and you along with him, or if he'll stay a child and have to grow up all over again."
Linx sighed. "Either way..." He looked at them, his expression grim. "What do I do?"
Maddox shrugged slightly before, "Love him, Linx. It's all you can do."
Linx entered the room he had been sharing with Kiy, bone-weary. He stared at the small figure huddled up under the covers, his small face barely visible under a mop of blonde hair. His hair had considerably darkened over the years and Linx smiled, having forgotten just how towheaded Kiy was as a child. He didn't understand what had happened today and his brain was alight with the buzz of the mystery surrounding those events.
Kiy, with as much as Linx had seen over the years, hadn't told him much about the abuses he endured at the hands of his caregivers, had never gone into great detail himself. Linx was not an expert in psychology but found himself wondering if maybe he should have pressed his friend and lover to talk about it more than he had, thus releasing the burden from his heart and soul. He had a gut feeling that this time he should. He thought that while the child without dealt with the raw pain of his recent past, the man within could begin to heal from this most recent catastrophe. He had never told the others what Kiy had been through minus small tidbits for their bettered understanding of why the boy was so jumpy all the time. Why he would hide behind them when men stared at him too long. He thought maybe he should fill them in but felt as if he would be betraying Kiy if he did, which is why he never told them in the first place. Maddox was intuitive enough to figure it out without having being told the details and wondered then if she'd ever shared her knowledge with Zimmer. He shook his head clear of the thoughts and slipped under the covers. The boy whined a pitiful and frightened sound. Linx looked to his right to find terrified eyes staring at him. "I'm not going to hurt you, little one," Linx told him gently.
"Linx?" The boy sounded unsure.
"Mhm. It's just me. No one here will hurt you." The boy scooted closer to him, burying his face in Linx's shoulder. "It's alright, Scarecrow," he said gently as he felt his shirtsleeve becoming moist. Soon the boy's breathing evened and Linx knew he'd fallen back to sleep. For Linx, however, sleep did not come so easily, finally succumbing to dreamland hours later.
He woke at sunrise to find himself alone, giving way to panic before he heard voices drifting from the main room. He smiled as he heard Kiy laugh at something Maddox had said. Slowly he climbed from the bed, the covers spilling around his feet and almost tripping him, he stumbled before catching his balance. Wiping the sleep from his eyes he wandered into the main room to be greeted by the smell of breakfast cooking on the hearth. Kiy smiled widely at him before coming over to him and asking to be lifted by reaching his hands up. Linx complied without comment and a soft smile. The boy instantly cuddled into him, his head resting heavily against his chest. "Good morning, mo croí."
He felt Kiy smile against his chest and he snuggled in further, soaking up Linx's warmth and reveling in the rush of loving emotion that swept through the older man. Linx kissed the top of his head, gently rocking them to and fro. "Food is about done," Maddox said as she checked the food.
He nodded at her before saying, "Hungry, little one?"
He shook his head neglecting to lift it from Linx's shoulder. "No. I just ate. I'm all full full now."
Linx smiled lightly over his head. "Yeah? Full full, huh? That's mighty full, then, huh?" The boy giggled and nodded. Linx sat down, Kiy still snuggled into his chest. "Sleep okay?" he asked angling his head to peer down the child's button nose.
The boy nodded. "Mhm. Not as many bad dreams. And you didn't let them get me." He said this last part quietly enough that only Linx heard him.
Linx kissed the boy's head and whispered, "I'll never let them get you, little one." He felt a stab in his chest from those words remembering what they had just rescued Kiy from on the last planet.
Kiy sat up and looked at him, his expression curious as he looked at him. He frowned as he reached his tiny fingers up to the crease in Linx's brow. "Why are you sad?"
Linx saw Maddox turn and look at them as she was pulling the food from the fire. He didn't look at her, his attention focused on the tiny face, and smiled the slightest bit. "It happens sometimes, little one."
Kiy placed his hand center of Linx's chest. "It hurts you." He looked at him with big, round eyes full of concern.
Linx gave a small upturn of his lips. "I'll be okay, Kiy."
"Here, Linx," Maddox said as she held out the plate of food. Her voice was soft and she spoke in a low register.
"Thank you." He took the plate as the boy slid from his lap. Linx immediately felt bereft of his weight and warmth, his heart clenching. "Where's Zim?" he asked between bites.
"He left early this morning to hunt for bigger game. Hopefully, he can find a deer or two for some red meat. Or something equivalent, anyway."
Linx nodded as he took another bite. "While he's doing that..." He broke off and looked at Kiy then back to Maddox. "We never did find any fruit yesterday."
Maddox frowned. "How about I do that once it gets light? So nothing happens..." They shared a look and Linx nodded.
"We should go back to that cave. Maybe you'll know about that statue." Kiy whimpered and Linx glanced over to him. "What's the matter, little one?"
Kiy looked at him, his eyes filling with tears that slowly dripped down his cheeks. "You wanna send me away?"
Linx frowned. "What? No. What makes you think that?"
He bit his lip. "The lady told me I can't go back there."
"What lady?" Linx asked confused.
"The statue. I guess it was her. There was a bright flash and I heard a lady say that..." He paused. "That love heals. And if I wanted to be healed, I couldn't go back there or bad things would happen." He swiped his skinny arm across his face and looked at Linx heartbroken. "Please don't send me away."
"I didn't know, Kiy."
"Is that why you're sad? Cause you have to send me back? Please don't send me back." Kiy was begging, his tears forgotten.
"Kiy, no, love. Come here, little one." Linx opened his arms and the frightened child scrambled into his hold. "I'm not sending you anywhere. You belong here with us."
"With you?" He sniffled and wiped his eyes again, the opaque orbs bright with uncertainty.
Linx grinned attempting and failing to keep his heart from twisting in his chest. Kiy had said those words to him long ago in a completely different context, though the fears present upon his face were very similar. "With me, little one."
Kiy stared into him, categorizing each emotion he felt pouring off of Linx, though not completely understanding the deep, resonant desolation marring the man's soul. He looked lost. Or like he lost something or someone important. "Colonel, Zim, and I can go check it out later today or tomorrow depending on what he brings home meal-wise. There's still plenty to do here that Kiy can help you with while we do that. More weapons need to be made for hunting.
"Winter will be coming soon, and it's going to last a while. Once the animals are skinned, we need to make some kind of winter clothing. Gather as many fruits as we can once we find them." She glanced at Kiy before continuing. "I would suggest not eating any of it until I can determine if they're safe to eat. We need to make traps for smaller game, also."
Linx nodded. "Okay," Linx answered finishing his plate. Maddox took it from him without prompting and set it aside to be washed. She watched him take deep breaths, his body rigid. She made a note to talk to him in private as she glanced at Kiy who studied him with sad eyes.
"Linx?" Kiy stopped in front of Linx as he sharpened stones to arrowheads.
Linx glanced up, a small smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "Yes, little one?"
"I gathered more stones like you wanted." He pointed to a pile several feet away and behind him. It was early in the afternoon, the suns still making their way toward the highest point in the sky. The sky was devoid of rain clouds, providing no cover from the bright light and scorching heat.
"Wonderful. That's a good pile of stones, too. Just the right size for what we need to do."
The boy smiled delightedly. "Linx?" He took a hesitant step closer, gnawing lightly on his lower lip. Linx set the stone he'd been sharpening down and opened his arms to the boy. Kiy came to them, smiling lightly as he was pulled into Linx's lap and protective arms wrapped comfortingly around him.
"You okay, mo croí?" Linx asked gently, kissing his cheek.
He shrugged. "I guess so."
"What's wrong, hm?" Linx gently rocked him back and forth, his tone soft. A genteel breeze swept up the boy's long hair, whipping it slightly against his forehead. He leaned his head against Linx's shoulder and shrugged.
"I don't know. Sometimes...sometimes I just feel sad." Kiy's voice was thick with suppressed emotion.
"What are you sad about?"
The soft, caring tone made the child's eyes water. "I just...I wish that you had always taken care of me. You'd never hurt me like they did. You wouldn't make me feel like they did."
"You want to tell me about it?" Linx angled his head to better see the boy's face, but he hid in expression by tucking his head under Linx's chin.
"I don't know. What if you don't like me anymore if I do?" Linx felt his back shudder as Kiy took shaky, uneven breaths.
"That isn't something you have to worry about, little one."
"Why are you sad, Linx?" Kiy sat up and looked at him, his eyes clear of tears.
"I...lost someone very dear to me. And I really miss him." Linx smiled painfully.
"Do you think you'll find him again one day?"
"I hope so, little one. I really hope so."
"My caregivers...they...hurt me. All the time. They would come into my room after hours and...and..." He sniffled and looked at Linx. Linx saw clearly through the eyes of a child what exactly they did, as he had in the past, though now was on a mission to eventually and in the near future get the boy to open up about what he saw. "They really hurt me. Made me scream. They liked it when I screamed. I didn't like it, Linx. And...sometimes it felt good...but I didn't like it...and that just confused me more. Why did they do it, Linx?"
Linx gently wiped the boy's face. "I don't know why baby boy. Sometimes people do terrible things. But that doesn't mean it was because of you. Some people are just cruel."
"I'm not bad?"
"No, mo chroí, you're not bad."
"They didn't give me a last name." Kiy knew even as a boy when first arriving with them on the training side of the compound that not receiving a last name was considered disgraceful.
"Well, if you want it, you can have my last name."
"You'd let me do that?"
"I would be honored if that's what you wanted to do, little one."
The boy smiled and nodded. "I would like that, Linx. Linx?" Linx raised his eyebrows in question. "What is your last name?"
Linx smiled. "Cameron."