Waking up to the smell of bacon has got to be the closest thing to Heaven there is. Well, one of the closest. Waking up next to… yeah, I'm not gonna finish that thought. He's too old for me right now. And I'm too young for anyone. Bacon will have to be enough for now. Bacon is good. Bacon is my friend. And pancakes. I love pancakes. With gravy of course. Man, I'm hungry.
Bethany had already gone down for breakfast by the time I got the twins dressed and fed. Packing them up and down the stairs by myself makes me want a ground level room. They are getting so big that it is getting difficult to carry them at the same time. Gram usually comes up to carry one of them for me, but for whatever reason, she didn't come up this morning. Alexis met me at the bottom the stairs and took Jackie for me which is odd. She hasn't ever been here for breakfast before. "Hey," I said. "Where's your mom? Or Gram?"
Her eyes evaded contact as she answered. "Oh, something came up they had to take care of. Farm stuff. Don't worry." There was a sadness in her tone. I wanted to press her for more information but figured Gram would tell me when she was ready to. We put the twins in their play pen and went to breakfast. None of the normal adults were at the breakfast table. Instead, I was eating in the company of Melinda and her girls, Alexis and Backus which was nice, but weird. There wasn't any gravy for the pancakes. Grr. I can't eat pancakes without gravy. I guess bacon and eggs it is.
With breakfast eaten and cleaned up, I was able to play with the twins a bit before their nap. Brittany had come to pick up Bethany for a few hours like she did every Tuesday and Thursday. Alexis and Backus went home after setting lunch up in the slow cooker as did Melinda and the girls which left me alone with the twins.
Solitude used to be enjoyable. I spent most of my growing up years home alone while Mother worked, and I learned to enjoy it. I'd sketch or read or write short stories. The last ten months here, I haven't a moment to myself. There has always someone in the house or up in my face about something. There is always something going on and I guess I've gotten used it because this solitude is kind of freaking me out.
I'd go see what the 'farm stuff' was, but there is no way I'd leave the twins in the house alone, even for nap time. So, rather than let my curiosity chew me up, I decided it was best to join the twins and take a nap. Or as my mind would have it, I lay down in my room and daydream about Josh. I wonder if Jude would like him. Wait. Why do I care? It's not like I need his permission. Well, the twins are his… So, it's not like he's in the picture. I don't know if he'll ever be in the picture.
His last letter said his grandmother had hired a lawyer that got him sentenced to rehab, rather than prison, which I guess is good. He said he had to go back to Reno for rehab which his grandmother didn't like. He is supposed to be there for six to eighteen months depending on well he does. He won't be able to write me or anyone else while he is there. I hope that girlfriend he mentioned is one that is willing to wait for him.
He said the good news is that his dad was convicted of seven counts of first-degree murder along with all the other things he was charged with and that the state was asking for the death penalty. Though he hadn't been sentenced at the time Jude wrote the letter, I'm hoping he got it. Gram would say that's a bad way of thinking; that everyone is savable as long as they draw breath. He can get saved. I don't care. I just think he should get back what he gave is all.
Okay, Melissa. Stop it. You don't need to be thinking about Jude, Josh or any other guy. You got bigger issues going on. Thanksgiving is next week, then Christmas and New Year's. Blink and your year here will be over. Now that Mom lives in her old house with Jimmy, I know I will be staying on the property. I just don't know if I will be staying with Gram or Mom. I miss Mom, but I think I prefer Gramma. She has taught me a lot and includes me in everything she does. Well, except for whatever they're doing today.
Maybe I'm just scared of what life would be like living with a stay-at-home mom AND a dad AND a new little sibling that is due within three months of release. I've never spent that much time with Mom before. I think I've spent more time Jimmy Dad this year than I have with her in the last ten years. Just the thought of it makes me nervous. I wonder if I'm going to get a choice of where I will be living after my year is up. And if I did, what would I choose? I don't want to hurt Mom's feelings. I also don't want to hurt Gram. I especially don't want to hurt Bethany. Jimmy don't matter though. He'll love me no matter what. He has no choice but to love me. I'm his clone.
I heard the door open downstairs, so I ran down to see had come in and maybe find out what everyone had been up to. I followed the voices into the kitchen. Gram and May were at the sink washing blood off their hands and face. "Oh my god! What happened?" I cried rushing up to them?
Without looking at me Gram replied, "We just had a little trouble with the local wildlife."
May added, "Cougar." I gasped. Cougars? We get cougars around here?
"Comes with the territory, I'm afraid. Though, it's been at least twenty-five years since we've had cougar issues. Coyotes, yes. Wolves a couple of times. Badgers, raccoons, owls, hawks and eagles often. But cougars? Not normally a thing."
"Did you get hurt? You got blood everywhere."
"It's not ours, hon." May offered solemnly. "Most of it is Smoke's."
"Oh, no! Dad's dog?"
"Yeah. She and Zeus were trying to defend the cattle." I clapped a hand over my mouth in disbelief. "I'm afraid she didn't make it."
Gram shook the water from her hands. "Zeus is in pretty bad shape too. Jimmy is taking him to the vet as we speak."
"What about the…"
"Oh, we got that cat." Gram ran her fingers through my hair; her green eyes displaying her satisfaction. "He's going to be stuffed. And then sold."
"Welp, ladies," May chirped. "I'm going to head home. We got a busy day tomorrow and this morning set a little behind for that. See you in the morning."
*
Gram and I had lunch together, then she went to shower and change while I played with the twins in the living room. "Tuna will be here in a few minutes." She informed me as she came back in the room. "Would you like your hair trimmed up?"
"I don't get likes, remember?" I smirked at her in play.
"True enough. Not without permission anyway. And you have it today. For a hair trim only. No punkish cuts. And no color."
"You know," I questioned. "I remember you saying something along the lines of "we don't do color here" and yet you have rainbow dreads. What's up with that?"
She laughed. "One. It's my house. I can do whatever I want in my house. And two, believe it or not, I hate these dreads."
"Then why do you have them?"
"It was a decision made in frustration. A kind of bet." I raised an eyebrow of confusion at her. "You see, when Jimmy left Sarah so she could be with Jeremy, I told him he was being stupid. I told him she was in love with him, but he was either too scared or too stupid to believe me at the time. So, I told him if he didn't come back and marry her, I was going to going to something we'd both regret."
"The dreads?"
"No. The rainbow colors. I've always despised hair color and rainbow is the worst. The dreads came when Sarah left with you. Pops and Jimmy hated the dreads, but I said I was keeping them until Sarah and Jimmy got married. They thought I was joking since she had left and all. But I knew God would bring her back to us. So, in a way the dreads were more of a visual prayer of mine. I hated the dreads as much as my husband and my son, yet they were a reminder to keep praying for Sarah's return and for those two to be together as they as should have been. Catholics have their prayer beads. I have had my prayer dreads." She flipped one of the dreads in her hand playfully to show it off.
"So, now that they are married…"
She let out a breathy sigh. "They come off today. After twelve years, they are going bye-bye. Good riddance, too." Her violet eyes danced in the sunlight that poured through the window. "So, if you would like a trim, I'll let him do you first. It'll take a while to take care of these."
"Not gonna lie, Gramma. I can't imagine without them."
"I'm Gramma now?" She smiled. I smiled back. Yeah, she's Gramma now. Witch or no witch, I adore her.
Surprisingly enough, Gram looked good without the dreads and her hair was longer than I had anticipated it would be. I thought for sure she would have be shaved, but she was left with shoulder length hair that was more salt and pepper looking then the silver dreads illuded to.
For whatever reason, Tuna wanted to keep the dreads, so she let him have them. I opted not to do anything with my hair just yet. I want to finish out my year untouched. Weird, I know, but I think I want to see how long it will get.
Speaking of long, the busy day May mentioned was a hair cutting party at the church. It didn't go by unnoticed by me that there were a lot of regular attendees and staff at the church that had exceptionally long hair. The likes of which included Mackerel, Darren and their wives. And May. May had really long hair too. Well, the plan was to let it get as long as could and then donate it to a foundation that makes wigs for people without hair, like cancer patients. They were going to make a video of before and after shots of those that are donating their hair and then present said video to the congregation on Sunday. I had to watch. I mean, I couldn't imagine any of them with short hair and food was going to served. Ponytail potluck.
So, I sat by the food table as they posed and showed off their hair for the before round. May was the first to go. Her hair was down to her waist, straight and naturally honey blonde. Her daughter Alexis was after her with her curly black hair that hung just past her shoulders. Next was Brittany, Mackerel's drop-dead gorgeous wife. He hair was down to her butt, thick and wavy and only a slightly darker honey color than May. Mackerel's hair was almost to his waist.
There was some dude with super long, super curly, super red hair. He kind of looked like a cross between the chick in the Brave cartoon movie and Cousin It. That dude had hair everywhere. His brother joined in with only slightly shorter red curls and one of their friends came with straight black hair to just above his waist.
Finally, Darren and his wife Erin were filmed. How did I not notice their hair was so long? Okay, I can see not knowing hers was so long, but he is on stage every week. Granted, he kept it in a ponytail or braid but still, you would think I would have notice it was down past his butt! Seriously, why do guys have so much prettier hair than girls usually?
Each person said their name and how long they been growing their hair out for the video. Tuna and one of his associates from his salon were there to tie back what they were going to cut off. Most of them had three ponytails that were cut off. The red-headed 'fro boys had like six because their hair was so thick. I was mesmerized by the transformation each person's appearance went through by a simple haircut. The women looked older and the men looked younger.
Darren was even hotter than before which I didn't think was possible. Mackerel looked more like Josh with the shorter hair which cause my mind to wander a bit down Lusty Lane. Nope! Stop it. Back to the food trays, Melissa. Oh, look! Cookies. I'm gonna turn into hippo if I don't get these dirty thoughts in check.
Think of the devil… "Pretty cool, huh?" His scent filled my senses as he stepped next to me, eyes on his brother getting his hair styled. "He's been growing that out since he got married."
I choked on my cookie. All I could was nod and mumbled out an incoherent "Uh huh." I swallowed hard, trying to regain some semblance of composure before he turned his attention to me. It didn't work. The cookie wasn't moving.
"You okay?" I nodded furiously, waving my hand in front of me. "Here, let me get you some water." He pulled a bottle from the cooler and opened it for me. I down half of it trying to wash down the extremely dry cookie that didn't want to be swallowed. It wasn't helping the situation like I had hoped it would. Rather, it tickled the back of my throat causing me to cough hard, thus spitting out the water and most of the cookie with it, all over Josh's jeans. Why? Because the idiot was standing in front of me! AND life just hates me. Just kill me now, please!
The man didn't flinch. He patted my back hard enough to get the cookie moving, then offered me a napkin and a smile. "You gonna live?" I nodded feeling my face burn with embarrassment. "You sure? I didn't mean to scare you."
I swallowed again to make sure my throat was clear before attempting to speak. "I-it's co-cool. I'm okay… Thanks." I wiped as much of mess off my shirt that I could as I spoke. "Sorry about your pants. I didn't mean to get you wet." He snickered a little. Oh my god! I just what? "Your pants! I mean. I didn't mean to get your pants wet… by spit-ting my water on you!" I buried my face in my hands.
"It's okay. Really. I really didn't mean to scare you."
"No, it's okay. I was just lost in my own thoughts, so I didn't notice you were standing there. My bad." Yeah, lust filled thoughts about you. I took a deep breath and let it slow in hopes that he wouldn't notice the tremor that was working its way through my limbs.
He pulled a chair up next to me and sat. I instinctively scooted away from him. He noticed. "I'm making you uncomfortable. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean…"
"No!" I said a little louder than I wanted to. I grabbed his arm to make him stay seated. "No. You don't. Well, sorta yeah, you do. But not because I d-don't like you. Quite the opposite, actually. I do like you. A lot. I just don't know what kind of like, you know?" He shook his head with a slight deer-in-the-headlights look about him. I let go of his arm and sighed. "I don't know if I like like you or if I'm just lusting after you."
"Lusting?"
"Yeah. Sorry." Yeah, shut up Melissa. Just stop talking. It's just when I touched your hand at the harvest party, my body went all… hot." Why am I telling him this? He doesn't need to know!! "Like really hot. And I'm not sure how I feel about that yet."
He threw his head back and laughed heartily. "Oh, thank goodness! It's not just me."
"What?!" Good thing I didn't have any food in my mouth or I would've choked again.
"You heard me. I've had those same feelings about you ever since I met you at the funeral. I've been going crazy trying to figure it out."
"You never even spoke to me until the harvest party."
"Yeah, Well, I'm a coward. I know that. Remind me to thank Tyler for being jerky enough to warrant my intervention." I snickered at his confession. "But, in my defense; you are young."
"True, true. I remind myself of that often."
"As do I." We leaned back in our chairs watching the stylists work their magic for the camera. "I think we should try to be just friends for now. Get to know each other and learn whether or not what we have is lust or something else. Deal?"
"We can't never be alone with each other."
"Agreed."
"Then, deal." I made eye contact with him and offered my hand for him to shake in pledge.
"You sure you want to risk the hot flash?" He grinned. I nodded with my own grin. He took my hand and shook it. I willed the butterflies to remain stationary until I was alone in my room.