ALEX'S POV
"Maddie is going to be picking you up from therapy today. You're going to hang out with her. Okay?" Mom reminded me as we were sitting in the parking lot of my therapist's office. I still don't understand why she can't go inside with me.
"Why can't you go in with me? I don't want to be there by myself!" I begged and whined.
"You love Mrs. Jones, baby girl. We can spend time together tomorrow. Just me and you. How does that sound?" She bargained.
"I love her.. but.. nevermind. Fine. I'll go by myself." I caved in.
"I love you, baby girl. Tell her anything you're feeling. Alright?" She kissed my cheek.
"I love you too, and alright." I replied as I got out of the car. I shut the car door and walked towards the door. It feels like the first day of school. Which is hell by the way. I slowly entered the building and was greeted by Mrs. Jones.
"Good morning, Alexis. I'm glad you're here." She smiled as she looked up from her laptop.
"Whatever." I mentally rolled my eyes as I sat down in my usual spot. She gave me a look as if to say get rid of the attitude.
"Your Mom told me about what happened two nights ago." Mrs. Jones started saying. I don't remember what happened really. I guess I grabbed a knife and threatened to kill myself. "Can you explain why you did that?" She continued.
"I honestly don't know." I shrugged.
"What do you mean by that, Alexis?" She looked up as her glasses were sitting on the tip of her nose.
"I mean.. like.." I struggled to form a sentence, trying to hold back tears. "One second I was in my room, and then the next I'm in the kitchen in Max's arms. I guess my mind went blank."
"I see." She said as she was writing something down on her clipboard. "Have you been hearing voices recently?"
"Yes, all the time. They tell me to cut, purge, or harm myself in any way possible. They tell me I'm not good enough and that I don't deserve to live." I replied as a tear slipped out of my eyes.
"I see.. have you been taking your medicine?" She asked, referring to my antidepressants.
"Um..." I bit my lip nervously. If I'm being honest, I never took it in two weeks. Why? 'Cause I trapped myself in my room for that period of time. "No." I spit out quickly.
"I want you to start taking your medicine again. Okay? If what you're experiencing is worse or still the same then we will bump up your medication." She replied. I nodded and before I walked out the door she handed me a Dum Dum lollipop. I'll just give it to Maddie. I don't want to gain more weight.
"How was therapy?" Maddie asked as I got in the passenger seat of her car.
"It was alright, I guess. It's tiring." I replied nonchalantly.
"How about we do something fun, yeah?" She asked as she plugged her phone in the AUX cord and pressed play.
"Like what?"
"We could go to the pier downtown. Go and get some snacks from there and ride all the rides till we puke." Maddie laughed. The idea of food down at the pier made me uneasy. It's all sweets and junk food.
"Yeah, sure." I agreed. I don't want her to be suspicious.
"Yes! I missed the pier." She exclaimed as we were heading in the direction of it.
"College life is busy I'm guessing?"
"You don't even know! I love it though, so it's okay." She responded as we pulled into a parking space.
"Oh my god! Look, it's Madison De La Garza!" We both heard someone exclaim and run over to us. "Can we get a picture with you?" The girl asked, referring to her and her friend.
"Of course!" Maddie smiled at them. I went to go pose with them but the girl stopped me.
"Not you. Take the picture, freak." She said in a bitchy voice. That hurt, not going to lie. Maddie gave me a sympathetic look and I shrugged it off. The girl handed me her phone and I took their picture. The girl and her friend then went on their way.
"You alright, Alex?" Maddie asked as we walked towards the pier.
"I'm fine." I responded nonchalantly.
"Let's take a picture in front of that brick wall!" She grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the wall. She set up her phone and put on a timer. "Pose!" She shouted.
"That's great!" I laughed at her caption. She captioned it saying that we should've discussed what pose we should have done. I noticed she turned comments off on her post. "Why did you turn the comments off?"
"That's great!" I laughed at her caption. I noticed she turned comments off on her post. "Why did you turn the comments off?"
"You have a habit of looking at comments. We don't need haters to ruin tonight." She replied.
"THEY HAVE THE TILT-A-WHIRL!" I screamed in excitement. "LET'S GO, BITCH!"
"Woah! Calm your tits!" Maddie laughed as I dragged her to the Tilt-A-Whirl.
"What tits?" I joked. The Tilt-A-Whirl has been my favorite for as long as I could remember.
- FLASHBACK -
"Mommy! Look! They have the spinny ride here!" Six year old me cried out in excitement.
"I see that, baby girl." She laughed as she looked down at me and also held my hand.
"I want to go on it!" I whined. "Come on, mommy!" I tried dragging her towards the ride.
"Calm down, Alexis." Mommy said trying to sound stern, but failing when she saw my begging face.
"But, mommy!" I whined more. "Please!"
"I have to get us tickets first, baby girl." She said calmly as she handed the man in a booth some cash. The man handed her some tickets. "Now we can go on the ride!"
"YAY!"
- FLASHBACK OVER -
"Why is this line so long!" I groaned in frustration. "Oh! We're moving!" I exclaimed excitedly as we moved up. We eventually made it up there and got on the ride. It was funny watching Maddie scream.
"WAS IT ALWAYS THIS FAST?! I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING TO GET WHIPLASH!" She screamed and laughed. I was laughing nonstop.
"I GOT TO PISS!" I cried out as I continued laughing. The ride ended and Maddie almost fell getting off it.
"I feel like Demi!" She joked. I went piss after, don't worry. We ate a bunch of snacks, like cotton candy, hotdogs, ice cream. I didn't even notice how much calories I was eating because I was having fun.
"It's late. We should probably get you home." Maddie said as we got off the last ride for the night.
"But I don't want you to leave! Can you sleepover?" I begged as we hopped in the car.
"I guess." She caved in.
"Awesome!" I smiled.
"Want to know what I just realized?" Maddie asked, suddenly looking scared.
"What?" I asked nervously.
"I forgot to grab your inhaler from your house! Demi will kill me!" She stated. "Wouldn't be the first time she tried to." Maddie jokes.
"I didn't have a panic attack though." I replied.
"Yes, but still." She said as we pulled into the driveway.
"Honey, I'm home!" Maddie and I said in unison when we walked in.
"I'm sleeping over and you can't say no!" Maddie shouted.
"I'm right here!" Mom said as she came out of the living room. "You forgot something important, Maddie. I told you that you could take Alex somewhere as long as you brought her inhaler." Mom said sternly.
"Mom.. don't get mad at her. I should've asked if she had it." I spoke quietly.
"It's not your fault, baby girl. I forgive you though, Maddie. Just don't forget it next time." Mom said as she pulled me into her embrace.
"How about we watch a movie before bed?" I asked both Mom and Maddie.
"Of course! What movie, baby girl?" She asked as she sat on the couch and patted the spot next to her.
"I don't think Maddie watched Harry Potter." I smirked.
"Harry Potter it is!" Mom exclaimed.
"Oh god. You're turning into geeks!" Maddie jokes.
"Says Miss Skipped a Year in School." Mom joked back. I held my arms out to Mom because I wanted to be held in her embrace. She pulled me close as we started watching Harry Potter for the second time this week. I love my family.