"Okay, so... explain to me again where Bruce is? And how you found out about it? I thought you said you weren't a telepath."
At Jen's recommendation, I ended up getting dinner for the two of us from some cramped deli tucked away in Brooklyn, the obscure kind of restaurant locals always swear by even though it's tucked into the armpit of the city and looks like a poster child for health code violations. Not knowing the first thing about deli food, I follow her suggestion, and sure enough, the sandwiches I pick up are really damn good. Gave the staff a hell of a shock when I just stepped out of their supply closet, since thats where I connected the portal to, but I think the generous tip I left made up for it. Conjured money, sure, but still!
Hmm, in retrospect, I could just have conjured up the sandwiches.
We're halfway through our meal when Jen asks me about Bruce's location, and I tell her what I know about his accidental trip to Sakaar and his subsequent career and a gladiator and revolt against the Red King. My power is only giving me the general idea of what's happening over there, but as far as I can tell, the planet has at least not blown up yet.
"Okay, so turns out Stark and Co's brilliant plan of shooting all their problems into space had a few drawbacks on it, and Bruce ended up on this craphole named Sakaar which was ruled by a jerk named The Red King. Long story short, he got weakened, enslaved, gladiator, escaped, led a rebellion, and riiight about now I think he's just about wrapping that up. As for HOW, it's a part of my powers, I can will knowledge to myself, but it's limited to the fact that I'm not omniscient and can only process so much" Well that, and I'm afraid of accidentally lobotomizing myself like I almost did that first day on Genosha, so I think I might be restraining myself, but she doesn't need to know that.
Jen stares sadly at the remains of her food "Sakaar? I've never even heard of that world, how are we ever going to find it? Even if we could force them to help us, if it was an accident Reed and Stark won't know either..."
"Oh, we can go whenever, I already know where it is." I point a thumb over my shoulder and a hole suddenly appears in the middle of space, showing a war-torn, devastated landscape beyond. Jen blinks, but quickly recovers.
"You know, not that I'm complaining or anything, but even in my days with the FF, space travel still required you to listen to Reed's technobabble for atleast 30 minutes, and hearing Ben and Johnny squabble like kids the whole trip. Had I known mutants had the best transportation, I would have hung around the X-Men a lot more."
"They're nice enough, but that Wolverine smell of cheap cigars and cheaper whisky has sunk into the wallpaper, it gets to you after a while" I finish my drink and pop the leftovers out of existance before getting out of my chair. "Anything else you want done, or you ready to go see your cousin?"
Jen stands up eagerly and rushes toward the portal, but stops halfway there, looking down on her business suit with a frown "I don't suppose you could whammy up a uniform or something for me? I'm not really dressed to go traipsing across a battlefield."
I roll my eyes and a wire hanger pops into existance next to her, containing that white and purple swimsuit uniform she wore a lot in the comic, along with a dressing screen to give her some privacy. Jen smiles and pulls the uniform off the hanger, before heading behind the screen while I sit back down and wait.
"I have to admit, I don't really see the point, that uniform covers less than your business suit! I could make you some armor if you wanted."
"I've got gamma powers, honey, I could fight naked if I wanted to. It's a matter of consistency, I don't wear superhero tights in the office, and I don't wear office clothes in fights. Also, I don't like ruining nice clothes in fights. You see what high-quality suits costs these days?" She steps out from behind the screen, dressed pretty much exactly like I remember her from the comics, an almost indecently tight one-piece swimsuit, white gloves and short boots. She walks over and places her folded up suit on an empty chair where she took off her heels earlier, and I take the opportunity to look her over appreciatively.
Hey, she might be insanely out of my league, but I can still look. Though judging by her sly smile, I'm pretty sure she caught me. Eh, worth it.
"Alright, let's go see how Hulk is doing with the smashing."
.....
Pretty good as it turns out.
By the time we arrived in the planet capital Crown City, which was a new experience in itself, the celebration over the Red Kings defeat, and the coronation of... I don't think they ever called him the Green King, but they might as well have, are in full swing, and the streets of the city are bustling with all manner of bizarre creatures. My time with the X-Men have jaded me a little, but the sheer variety of aliens around is still a pretty novel experience, especially the ones who aren't the Star Trek kind, i.e "hot humans in different colors or random crap glued to their foreheads". As far as I know, there aren't any humans on Sakaar, but I don't really look different enough from other humanoids to draw much attention. The same can't be said for Jen, and not just for the same reason she draws attention on Earth.
I'm guessing when a muscular, green woman who looks suspiciously like your muscular, green king shows up out of nowhere, it might raise a few eyebrows.
Between the two of us, we push our way through the already rather drunk crowd, ignoring the stares we're getting, until we finally arrive in the center of the city, where the new kings memorial is being constructed. And even from a distance, its easy to spot the Incredible Hulk, even in an alien crowd where he doesn't stand out quite as much as he does with us puny humans. I think his bicep might be bigger than my entire torso. A guy can't help but feel a little inadequate, even with phenomenal cosmic powers.
Rather than trying to fight through the crowd gathered to celebrate their new ruler, a burst of power teleports us closer to the stage, which in retrospect, I realize I could have done better, as it understandably alarms the alien warriors surrounding Bruce. A grey-skinned woman in rather impractical armor jumps away from the Hulks side and draws her weapons, quickly joined by a stone man who resembles a slimmer Ben Grimm, a xenomorph-looking monster, and an ugly bug-guy I faintly remember as the guy behind World War Hulk. Two other move to join them, but the confrontation doesn't get any further as Bruce's eyes widen in recognition, even as Jen jumps up on the stage and embraces him.
"Bruce!!"
"...Jen?!"
I notice the grey-skinned womans face switch being shock and pure rage.
Oh. Right. Bruce's new wife. I suppose this does look sort of bad from her perspective.
....
"So.... alien warrior queen, huh? Bet you don't find that job in the classifieds"
Caiera shoots me a flat look, distracting her from glaring jealously at Jen for a moment. "You're from Earth, you're the alien."
"Fair point."
We somehow managed to get back to the palace without causing a riot, mainly because when the goddamn Hulk tells a crowd to settle down, that crowd settles the fuck down. After a brief, panicked explanation to Caiera that Jen was in fact Bruce's cousin and she was not a former lover or lost daughter or anything of the sort to prevent a fight from breaking out, everyone settled down in an uneasy peace while Jen explained how we found him. Unfortunately, this left me on the sidelines with Caiera and the rest of the Warbound while Jen got the story directly from Bruce.
Small talk isn't my strong suit.
Aside from the three I had already seen, the last two members of Hulks crew turns out to be a dark-skinned man named Hiroim, apparently a member of a tribe called the Shadow People, and a former royalty-turned gladiator, a red-skinned woman named Elloe. Stone Guy turns out to be named Korg, while Evil Bug Guy is named Miek. The xenomorph creep doesn't have a name.
Apparently they find the brief description Jen gives of my powers somewhat unbelivable, as I'm technically the strongest person on the planet, even if my appearance doesn't quite match it. Considering that the Red King managed to briefly enslave the friggin Silver Surfer, I can understand their skepticism. Korg looks like he's halfway to challenging me to a fight, while Miek just gives me an uncomfortable look. Caiera can't seem to decide if she dislikes me or Jen more.
Trying to distract myself, I reach out with my powers toward the monument down in the city, searching for the damaged warp core that destroyed Sakaar in the comics. Sure enough, the warp core is there, but so are a bunch of explosive devices that most certainly are NOT supposed to be in there, and with some focus, I render the devices inert pieces of scrap. I give Miek an angry glare, which just seems to unnerve him, before turning back towards Jen and Bruce.
"Jen, it's wonderful to see you again, I wasn't sure I'd ever get to, but my place is here on Sakaar now. I've found..." He looks towards Caiera and smiles "more than I ever thought here, more than Earth could provide. There are people I'll miss, but... you can probably guess why I'm in no hurry to return."
Jen nods sadly "I suppose I can't blame you, I wouldn't want to go back either. Atleast I can come and visit you now that I know where you are."
Bruce chuckles deeply "Sure, I'm just a step across the galaxy away" He looks up at me "I'm guessing you'll be taking that guy with you too if he's the one who brought you here? Not your usual type, but you could do worse."
I clear my throat, catching everyones attention "Before the conversation descends into whacky relationship misunderstandings, I wanted to take a moment to point out that you might have a problem on your hands."
Everyone seems to stiffen a bit at my words, and Bruce raises a curious eyebrow "Oh? Anything I should know about?"
"Yeah, there's a bunch of explosives stuffed into the warp core of that spaceship you got out there that I'm guessing weren't there when you landed. I defused them, but you might want to get on top of that, I don't think space ships come pre-equipped that way. "