"Girls never forget what their fathers did and said. Girls are actually most offended by their fathers, most happy with their fathers."
*
I frowned and looked at their faces one by one and rolled my eyes. "Is it funny? Why are you guys listening to us?"
"We're not here to listen, Elizabeth. We've come to get you."
While everyone was laughing, I was looking angrily at Dylan. He came to me and bowed to my head. My head was spinning again as he whispered in my ear.
"Come on Elizabeth... I don't understand why you want to sleep here when you can sleep in my warm arms and hug me."
"I... It won't happen. Keep your dirty thoughts to yourself!"
"Come on guys! Let's take the girls to our house. They ran away tonight. I'll take Elizabeth. Share Gwen."
Tom glared at Dylan. Dylan raised his hands and said, "I'm kidding!"
When we came to their house, my mouth was left open. Now you are expecting a beautiful house, right? On the contrary, their houses, floating in dirt, smelled awful. When Dylan saw my face wrinkled, he put me in a room. The fresh and familiar smell of the room made me confused. He hugged me from behind and started kissing my shoulder. I lean my head back. And suddenly I was nervous about the last thing that came to my mind. "Get her in the net, Dylan!" He was still kissing my shoulder as his sentence messed my mind.
"Dylan, I want to sleep."
"Okay. Let's sleep..."
"No. I want to sleep alone. Even Gwen come to me."
"Gwen is already asleep with Tom... You will sleep with me too."
"I want to be alone."
Dylan was holding my wrists again. I barely opened my mouth as I gasped.
"My wrists... Dylan... Let go!"
I shouted at my last word. Dylan dropped my wrists and punched the wall. And then he came and knelt in front of me. He hugged my legs when I started to cry in shaking.
"Sorry... Sorry... I forgot... Don't cry... Please..."
I heard his thoughts as he deliriously hugged my legs.
"God damn it! Don't cry, please, don't cry Elizabeth! I'm such an idiot! I'm hurting her so I can be close to her. What's going on? Why do I fall in love with my enemy? When do I become so crazy? Why can't I give up on you? Why? I guess I can't do that. I can't hurt her. Damn it!"
I stopped crying and looked at Dylan, who was hugging my legs. Dylan... I was feeling something for him. He fell in love with me. His thoughts were sincere. I was feeling it. I was hearing. Why was he seeing me as his enemy? I wanted to know this. I have to learn. Maybe if I was close to Dylan, I could be happy and learn the answer. As a result, he was already in love with me. One wouldn't hurt the loved one, would it?
I leaned over and I hugged him. He laid me on the bed as he took me in his arms. As he was leaving, I pulled him to myself. He lost his balance and fell beside me. I laughed and stroked his face as he looked at me in surprise.
"Can you sleep with me?"
When I suddenly kissed him, he hugged my waist and pulled me towards him. He was responding harshly to my kiss. He left my lips and started kissing my wrists. My arms, my forehead, my ear... As he offered me his peaceful kisses away from passion, the things that crossed his mind made me laugh:
"Fuck the plan! I think I'll faint!"
*
When I woke up I could not first understand where I was. Then I remembered what happened last night. Dylan gave me peaceful kisses, as I call it, and then I hugged him tightly and slept with him. I woke up from the best sleep of my life. But still, I had a feeling that everything was not going well.
When I looked to my left, I saw Dylan watching me with a smile. I smiled at him too. Then my smile faded suddenly with the ringing of my phone. When I picked up the phone, I saw my mother calling. I frowned at the sound when I answered the call. My mother was... crying.
"Hello? Mom? Why are you crying?"
"Elizabeth... your father... your father was killed, my daughter... come home immediately..."
Before I could answer, she hung up the phone on my face. I was just looking in front of me with the phone in my hand. My father... He couldn't be dead. He was strong. Once he was my father. He was a father. Fathers couldn't die! Whereas I said to my father, "You're not going to leave me, will you daddy?" "I will never leave!" he said. So the fathers could not keep their promises after a while.
I left the room as I jumped out of bed. I was just thinking about my dad when Dylan shouted at me from behind. My father, who was going to protect me with his life, left without saying goodbye to me. What a nonsense that was. The question I asked my father when I was little came to mind. "Dad, you don't die, do you?" When I said, he smiled at my face again admiring him. My father said, "Where did this come from, my angel? Everyone will die one day." I started crying when he said that. "But... Dad, you are very beautiful, beautiful things should not die. Besides, you are the father. First of all, fathers don't die!" The man who leaned over my face and kissed my tears when I said this... Why did you leave me?
I was running. The house was far from here. But I was still running. Even though I was out of breath, I was hurt... When I finally got home, I realized that I had been running for half an hour. I didn't care. The door to the house was open. I immediately went inside. My mother was lying on the sofa, she was sleeping, the tears were still fresh. I knelt beside her. She immediately opened her eyes, as if waiting for me to come.
"Elizabeth..."
"Mom... Are you sure? Seriously... Seriously he is gone?"
I wish I hadn't asked... When my mother started crying again, I hugged her. And I heard her thoughts.
"Whoever killed him will come for you too! How will I stop them? How will I protect you? How many times I asked the doctors... I asked the doctors many times if they were sure that your father was really dead. He died. It's over now, I can't do it, I'm sorry my daughter... Forgive me!"
Mom's last thoughts... How could she give up so easily? Suicide was not the solution. She could stay with me and continue her life. But I also understood her. She was in love with my father, the man she loved was killed. And looking at her decisions, I knew I could not stop her no matter what I did. Then... If I was destined to be alone... Okay, I would be alone. When I hugged her a little tighter, I listened to the torrent of emotions that I do not feel at the moment, but also spread through my body as if it were my feelings. These were my mother's feelings. Sometimes we say I know how you feel to the other person...
I really knew right now. In every sense. I could feel her love for my father, her sorrow for me, her anger towards herself. This many emotions were too much for me. So I left my mother gently.
"Mom, where is my dad right now?"
"Their relatives are making preparations for the funeral. They decided this because they thought I could not bear it. Well, I could not..."
"When is the funeral?"
"One hour later."
"Let's get ready then, get up. Let's not leave my father alone!"
"I can't come Elizabeth! I can't! I need to be alone! You go!"
I knew. She will end everything while we were all there. But she was selfish. She was doing this because she was thinking of herself, not my father. Love was selfish. I would never stop her. I always knew she loved me, she made me feel it. But her eyes, which had been blind at some moments because of her love for my father, always worn down our mother-daughter relationship. She always prioritized my father in her life. My father always kept me at the center of his life. So he was everything for me. He was not here anymore, but he also took a piece of my soul on his way. If necessary, he did not take a piece of my soul, but I would rip it off and send it to him. The people who broke me... I am sending the lives you have torn from my soul to my father. Because the lives you took away from my soul were the work of my father. So my father, my dear, will never feel alone. I swear, father, I will find those who killed you before my time runs out. Then maybe I can feel a little better.