The smell always brought a chill down his spine. The scenery was a familiar place, one that could never be forgotten. The bright fluorescent light hung over his head, putting him in the same spotlight he felt years ago.
Some of the doctors greet him, happy to see his recognizable face. But he isn't. His more worried about Sabrina than about the memories that attempt to resurface.
"Miss Sabrina Chase?" The doctor stands in his stark white coat.
"That's us." All three of them stand up at the sight of the nurse, Amanda and Toby beside me.
Amanda doesn't seem to be holding up well, perspiration evident on her forehead and the occasional rubbing of her palms on her jeans indicates clammy hands.
She's not the only one who feels nervous.
"She's okay. She had a panic attack and a migraine but she will be fine. We're discharging her tomorrow, we just want to run some tests before letting her go."
A chorus of relieved sighs escapes us all. Feeling like we almost lost her and not knowing where her friend may be, may have had her not resting in peace.
"I need to go to the bathroom. Be right back." Amanda leaves the room swiftly, leaving a lingering smell of vanilla.
They stand in the corridor, wondering what happened. Both Toby and Hendrik glance at each other and they move opposite sides of the hospital, uncovering the mystery between the girls.
Toby reaches Amanda, hair covering her face. She types furiously but her body doesn't seem tense.
"What's going on Amanda?" She flinches in her place and turns to face Toby.
"What do you mean?"
Toby shakes his head at her attempt of playing dumb, glancing around the sterile room.
"Amanda, please don't do this to me."
She glances up, looking at his mop of brown hair and striking blue eyes.
Amanda fiddles with the phone in her hand and takes his rough hand, leading him to the plastic chairs.
"Sabrina received a message earlier today. I can't go into depth but I'll take a chance and say the news she received is what landed her here."
Toby glances back to Hendrik, watching him pace with his hands balled into fists. He looks back to Amanda and nods, tightening his hold on her hands.
"Just be safe." Amanda nods and is thankful for his gentle persona.
"Thank you for being so understanding."
She just hopes they find her in time.
°•°•°
Hendrik stayed throughout Sabrina's stay at the hospital. He never left her side, only left to have a cup of Sabrina's favourite coffee, Cappucino.
She already knows where she is and she despises the place, the place that took away someone valuable to her.
She wasn't an only child all her life, she has fragments of someone that took a role as being her older brother. Biological brother.
The moment she woke up, Hendrik was the first to see her honey green eyes, blinking furiously.
"Hendrik?" Her parched throat felt scratchy. He hands her a glass of water and helps her drink.
"What happened?" She sits back into the bed, the pillows feeling better than her own at home.
"You fainted and they told us you had a panic attack and a slight migraine. They discharging you tomorrow."
She nods.
"Sabrina, is there something you want to tell me?" Hendrik sits back down in the plastic chair.
"No." She whispers, filling the room accompanied by the monitor and the voices outside.
"You sure?" He whispers back. The room is too calm to be broken by loud voices.
"Mm." She nods and they leave at that. He grabs her and give it a light squeeze.
"I'm here if you need to talk." She stares into his eyes, a lone tear rolls down her cheek seeing his crestfallen face.
He places his cold hand on her cheek, wipes the tear and kisses the hand his holding onto.
"I'm here." He whispers and they sit in silence, staring at each other. Their eyes roam around each others features, capturing this moment.
Because who knows when they will have another one like this? Sabrina takes hold of his hands, grazing her fingers lightly over his red knuckles.
"What happened?" He shrugs and pulls his hand away. Sabrina hopes that it wasn't something drastic; she hates it when his hurt.
"I punched a locker at school. They forced me to go back and I was mad. It's nothing major." Hendrik looks away. He hates lying to her. He feels as if his betraying her, in a twisted way. Sabrina takes his hand, softly runs her fingers across the scars and kisses it. The notion of her lips on his knuckles sting him, a soft moan emitting from his lips. She looks up and sees his eyes tightly shut, bringing a smirk to her face.
"I was thinking of having dinner after leaving the hospital. What do you think?" Taking her unoccupied hand, he plays with her fingers while contemplating her idea. He would love to go with her but his not so sure about it. They are keeping their relationship exclusive, his afraid of who might see them. After what Amanda told him that day, his not sure about pursuing it anymore. He has to ask her. The night she got raped.
°•°•°
"Hendrik!" The shrilling scream of his mother. His used to that scream and the unstable household, the cliche broken home. What better way of living a teenage life if you don't have a drunk mother and an absentee father. A brother who's probably a junky and a sister who fucks every boy in town. What a beautiful way of living.
"Yes Lauren!" He turns back to his work, the dim light illuminating the tiny attic slash room. It's not the ideal room he would go for but what more can he do? Nothing.
"Get your lazy arse down here!" Her Texas accent clear as day; her temper could be genetic or not.
"For what?!" He continues with his work, listening to nothing in particular. The birds tweeting and telling each other about their adventures. The rickety tree knocks on the dark window, shocking him momentarily.
He stops what he does and looks around the dark room, glancing at the chalky drawings and the band posters hanging over his single, lonely bed. The Malaysian rug takes up half the room, bringing a homely feeling into the attic. The light oak bookshelf is pushed to the very end of the room, carrying only textbooks and one or two novels. His study desk is adjacent from the bed, holding a lamp and a few school books. The window that's right by his bed, is opened and letting the moon shine into the chilly room.
"Don't speak, boy. Come down now!" He sighs and leaves the room, silently cussing and thinking of ways to leave the damn house.
"Yes Lauren?" His mother sits perched on the armrest of the couch, a beer can loosely held in her hand. She still wears the wedding ring, hoping he'll come back. "How many times must I tell ya, don't call me by my name. I'm your mother, child. Respect." He sighs and sits near the fireplace, the wood crackling in the small space of the living room.
"You keep wishing for Papa to come back and yet you do this to yourself. You really think he would want to see you like this? Drunk and looking like a mess? I deserve better than this instead I got a family that's in shambles." Before he could react, he hears the beer can drop and glances back to see his mother on the floor, gargling white foam.
He becomes frantic and immediately calls the ambulance, his voice coming out rushed and frantic. He tries everything he knows about keeping a person conscience but it's no use. Her body is jerking and her eyes are rolled back, scaring Hendrik.
"Mama, stay with me. Please!" At this point he was sobbing, shaking and slapping his mother, who hadn't stopped jerking. Tears of fear started to fall down his cheeks, landing on her soft cardigan.
"Mama!" At that moment, she went still and the ambulance came in, pushing him aside. "Mama!" He watched as they took her up in a stretcher, her body unmoving.
"I'm sorry sir but she's-" Hendrik burst into tears, knowing what followed that sentence. His mother's gone. She's dead and no one is here to comfort him.
°•°•°
"What happened to you?" Donna, Hendrik's sister, stands by the threshold of his room, watching as his brother sits idly on the wooden bed.
"Where the fuck were you?!" Hendrik stands to his full height and stalks over to his sister. Donna notices the bloodshot eyes and the swirling anger that lingers in his eyes. His demeanor seems dark, fists clenched and a jaw that looks like it's about to break.
"Woah, no need to be angry. I was at Jeremy's. Lost track of time." That one sentence broke something in him. He realised his little sister will forever be irresponsible and careless.
"Do you know what I had to witness today? Do you even know where mother is?!" She unfolds her arms and lazily rolls her eyes.
"Where is the drunk woman?"
"She's dead, Donna! Dead! You weren't here and neither was Nathan!" Donna steps back from her brother and holds onto the door.
"You lie!" She screeches and tries to slap him but it comes as futile attempt.
"Why would I lie about that?!"
Silence looms over them and Hendrik only wonders what happened for his family to become like this.
"Pathetic." He closes the door on her face and goes back to replaying the events of today.
She's really gone.