I kept on shifting in my bed. I can't sleep. I can't sleep even though want to.
I lay on my back facing the ceiling, my eyes bloodshot from the lack of sleep. This wasn't supposed to happen. This wasn't! I should have never answered to the bell. Why the hell did I? And now I can't sleep because I'm worried about them. This Abigail and Ian. Going to their relatives. They never thought this would happen. This is unfair for them. I remember the broad smile on Abigail's face. The gleam in Ian's eyes. They both are happy. And I'm the one who's going to ruin it.
I should have never become so close to them. I'm such an idiot. Why didn't i shut myself from my feelings? I always did. Was i that excited about Mr. Miller not being in home that I let myself into this mess? And now he's here. He's back and he's more insane than usual.
What am I gonna do?
I sit up straight on my bed, drawing in a deep breath. The moon shines on my face through the window, watching me, as if waiting for me to make a decision. Have i been disappointing you just like I disappoint me?
Cause I've been thinking. And I realize that I need to make things right. How long am I going to hide like this?
I need to help them. Before he reaches them.
I look at my watch. Its late in the night. It's three in the morning.
Shit.
I need to hurry.
I quickly get off my bed, grab my jacket and wear my shoes.
They need to get out of here.
I don't care what happens if Mr. Miller finds me now.
I can't just do anything.
I get out of my room. My steps so light and quiet that it felt like i was floating. Like i would take the next step without letting my previous one land on the ground. It feels like a dream...
Hopefully, it's not. And hopefully...I save them.
The apartment in dark, i can't see anything but i don't dare turn on the lights. I Know he's not here. It scares me that he isn't.
My heart threatens to burst out, my whole body shivering - not because of the cold. This is the first time I'm going to 'see' what happens this night. All those nights this would happen, I'd force myself to sleep away my worries.
Not this time.
I flinch when the front door creates a low noise.
Here goes...
************************************
I walk up the stairs. It's so dark that I don't think I'll be able to see anyone at all. But that's good. Because this means nobody will be able to see me either.
Hurry, Joey. I think to myself, clenching my fists. Don't give up now when you've came so far.
I keep walking ahead, towards the room. I don't know what my plan is, but al i know is they will make out alive.
They have to.
Maybe this is my way of proving that I'm not like Mr. Miller. Maybe...
All of a sudden I hear heavy footsteps in front of me. It's like someone's running. I hide myself behind a wall leading to another lobby. I hear someone breathing heavily. My heart beats as i dare to catch a glimpse of the person.
That's when I see Abigail. I see her and I know I'm too late.
**********************
My eyes grow wide with fear, seeing her look so desperate, blood dribbling from her forehead as she falls on her knees, shivering.
I don't go near her, frozen in my tracks.
What was I thinking? Did i really think I could save them? Me. The kid who's powerless in front of Mr. Miller. The kid who never cares about anything except himself.
Her bloodshot eyes dart left and right, in attempt to find someone. But no one will come. No one. She's as good as gone.
And I'm hidden in this eerie darkness of the motel, watching her attentively.
What is she gonna do? Where is she gonna run? I wonder.
Somehow her expressions says it all. Her husband isn't here. That means Mr. Miller got him. But she can't leave him behind. How can she? But if she goes back to where Ian is, Mr. Miller will get her.
What is she gonna do?
When they came for a night stay, they just wanted to meet their family. That's all they wanted.
I swallow a lump in my throat, remembering how enthusiastic she was. Ranting on and on about her life. She doesn't deserve this. She doesn't.
This heavy thought makes me flinch, compelling me to feel a punch right in the gut. Maybe a move more than I intended to, or maybe she heard me when a let out a crumbling breath.
But she finds me. Her red eyes look into mine, and I'm caught. She spotted me through all the blackness of the motel.
"Joey!" She cries out, but her voice is low. Low so that Mr. Miller won't hear her.
I stand there, dumbstruck, my feet glued on the floor, not daring to move a muscle. As if that would make me disappear.
She stands, clumsily, her face filled with.... relief?
No, no, no.
Don't come near me - no.
Does she think that i can - i can save her?
"Joey!" She says again, half-limping half-walking towards me.
She was in bad shape. I feel so guilty. I feel so horrible to see her in this mess.
Abigail falls right in front of me, her head bowed down, staring at the floor.
And I just stand there. That's all I do.
Worthless.
Finally she looks up at me. Tears of dread emerging from her scared eyes. My heart beats faster when she grabs hold of my shirt, shaking me into my senses.
"H-help me Joey!" Her voice slurs, the injury on her head being the reason behind it. "T-there's someone... he attacked and - and I ran but Ian! He's g-got Ian, Joey! Save h-him! P-please, Joey save him!"
Her tears won't stop. Her voice squeaks and cracks yet she still continues to speak,
"H-he had a-a weapon! H-he's going to k-kill us J-Joey! Ian, Joey! Save Ian! P-please hurry!"
I stare at her. Look at how different she's acting when death is near.
What can I do, to save her?
He won't let me do anything! Hell, I wasn't even supposed to be awake. But I wanted to save them. Save them before he got them. But I'm too late. Ian is dead. Abigail will die. And if I stay here, so will I.
"Please, Joey!" She weeps, trembling violently, her grip never loosing from my shirt.
A part of me wants to run back to my room. Pretend that this never happened.
But now, the feeling's changing. I can't let her die.
All my life, I avoided these nights - ignored them like bad dreams. But this nightmare is true. And I'm living it. Might as well win it too...
"J-Joey?" Abigail's voice rips me away from my thoughts.
This time I look at her directly in the eyes, adrenaline coursing in through my veins.
"Alright." I breathe out, my blood hot, "I'll help."
Before she starts to say anything, I gently grab her hands and grunt to pull her to her feet.
"C'mon!" I grit my teeth with the effort. "We need to get you out of here!"
"J-Joey..." She whispers, "Ian?"
I swallow the acid of my churning stomach reaching my throat.
How can I tell her Ian's gone? That Mr. Miller's got him now.
There's no way he's going to live.
I hesitate, before saying softly, "I'm... sorry. I'm sorry but...Ian's gone."
Her eyes widen, with shock. Loss for words.
But i can see that she was expecting this. I can see it in her eyes.
But that doesn't mean she'll believe it.
"No, no, no, no, no, no!" She shouts, not caring that her voice is loud.
"NO, NO, NO!" She screams, "You're WRONG, Joey! You don't know!"
I flinch from her tone, looking at the ground guiltily. Ashamed.
"I'm sorry..."
Her tear's keep spilling on her red cheeks as she mumbles stuff.
About how she can save him
About how he's not dead.
But she knows that she can't do anything. She knows.
Suddenly, I notice something off. I start to feel another presence.
The blood drains from my face as someone touches my shoulders and grabs hold of it .
Shit...
"Joey's right." Mr. Miller says, sinisterly, "Your husband is dead."
Abigail lets out a moan, crying out for Ian.
I don't dare move. I don't dare to turn my face and look up at him.
The grip on my shoulder tightens as i wince in pain, feeling the devilish smirk on his face.
But the look on Abigail's face feels worse than anything. Feels worse than everything I've ever felt.
Her eyes shift from me to Mr. Miller and back again.
She opens her mouth, "Y-you knew about h-him?"
The question directed towards me.
I feel like I'm sinking. Sinking deep inside water, black claws pulling me in. And i can't get out. Not able to breathe, not able to speak.
"Why, of course he knew about me." Mr. Miller beams, smugly, "He's my 'son', after all."
I don't say anything.
And it hurts. It hurts to see her hope spilling away.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
But I can't save her now.
The Shadow leans over, to whisper in my ear.
"Run."
And this word is enough for me to flee, glancing a look at Abigail, who doesn't give any response, staring into space.
She lost.
And I couldn't save her.
Tears drip from my eyes. And i don't know if its because of the pain or the regret. Maybe both.
This night I realized.
I'm nothing.
I'm sorry but I'm a no one.
I can't save you or anyone from here.
I can't even save myself.