And that's exactly how I spent the rest of my time. Watching a movie which was on repeat. In a crowd full of teenagers bunking there classes. It was a wonder how no teacher or prefect or whatever came to make them leave, you know what I mean? Everything was just so... unorganized yet I can't argue with that. At least I was chilling with a movie - which, as a side note, I was watching for the second time but hey, it was a movie! End of discussion.
I looked at my wrist-watch, slightly relieved that it was twelve. Movie or not, I was getting bored. Getting up, i pushed through the groups of kids, walking to the office. I grinned and waved at the secretary, who rolled her eyes, calling Alex.
"The boy's here." she said simply, and after a short pause, I was led inside.
I held my breath, as I entered the office. It was the same. With the same clean and polished furniture and the glass table and glimmering ornaments.
Alex stood facing the window, her long black hair reaching down to her back. I frowned, wondering what she was staring at. Like I had said before, there was nothing to see except for the pictures pasted from the outside. Yes, I like to look at the window too, but only when I'm thinking. is she thinking? About how to tell me what she needs to tell me?
i cleared my throat loudly enough for her to hear me.
"No need to do that, Mr. Skale," her voice was smooth and perfect, "I am very well aware that you are sitting behind me."
I frowned, "If that's the reason then why don't you face me?"
I didn't meant to be rude but I was feeling anxious, my heart was insisting to beat out of my chest if she wouldn't hurry.
She turned, slowly, her lips formed in a smile which I didn't like. She was hiding something. but what? I stared with the same intensity in her brown eyes. She sat down, with a sigh. A sigh. So she was hiding something. God, I can't take this!
"I.." She started.
I looked at her Intently, digging my nails in my palms with anxiety.
That's when i realized, there was no good news. she wanted to tell me something but she didn't know how to. Because she knows I'd break. I wouldn't be able to take it.
Taking a long shaky sigh, I spoke up, "I understand. I get what you want to tell me."
She stared at me, and I saw that she was feeling sorry for me. pitying me.
"I tried my best. I -" she explained but I didn't want any of it. I didn't want to be consoled.
"Totally get it." I gave her a thumbs up, trying to grin but it just refused to show up, "It would have been a miracle if you would have found him anyway."
Because he's truly gone. After years of searching for him, he's still not found. And it's been three bloody years. So either he refuses to meet me or... Or he's dead.
Her wrinkly face scrunched up into a scowl as she said, 'Yes. that's it."
"Guess I should be going now." I scratched the back of my neck, ignoring the tears welling up in my eyes.
Alex nodded, raising her index finger, "One moment." she started searching for something in her drawers and for a second, my heart leapt with hope.
"Yes?" i said. Maybe she had forgotten. maybe she did find dad.
"Here's the schedule for this term. For you" She rose her hand to give me a piece of paper but I was frozen.
So she didn't find him. So that meant I had to do what I had promised I'd do. Act normal. Or, in other words, act like the others. Study, Play, eat.
be in a routine which I never wanted to be in.
But i had made a deal, which I had never intended to complete. what hurt even more was that she didn't find him.
nodding i took the paper, and headed without another word, even ignoring the secretary I loved to tease....