The silence continued. Ari finished putting my clothes in the drawer.
Why won't he talk? Why am I not talking to him? Talk to me please!
Of course he can't hear me because I'm talking to myself again, but I don't have the strength or the will to do it. That 'hi' took a lot of braveness in me.
Why can't I do it? We're friends! I don't need to be shy to him.
". . ."
". . ."
I looked at him in the corner of my eyes, not daring to stare straight at him.
"U-um..." Oh my gosh, of course you need to stutter!
When he heard my voice, he stopped what he's doing and looked at me. His stare was really unnerving.
"I'm sorry." I murmured. It was a surprise that Ari heard that.
"What are you sorry for?"
Hmmm... What am I really apologizing for? My brows knitted at that question. Am I sorry about not answering his call? Or it's about not asking permission or maybe both? I really don't know. All I know that I need to apologize to him because I can't bear it if he's angry with me.
"You know... for not telling you about where we were."
He raised his right eyebrow. "Why are you apologizing to me? I'm just your servant." His voice filled with mockery.
"You know you are my friend." I glared at him. My voice raised.
How could he think like that?
"Oh really? Friends don't hurt each other."
Huh? But I didn't?
I stared at him in confusion. "I never hurt you. I wouldn't dare to hurt you. You're my friend." I explained, giving emphasis on the last word.
He sighed then shook his head, grumbling in exasperation.
"You don't get it, do you? I was worried about you. And it hurt my feelings that you more want to keep you going to mall a secret than trusting me that I will not rat you."
"It's not that I didn't trust you, it's just that I'm afraid that you will—"
"Rat you." Ari continued.
"No! Ugh! It's not that. Okay?! I'm just... scared." I looked down at my hand. It really look interesting right now.
I felt him staring at me for a second. "You need to rest. Let's talk about it after things become normal."
I nodded, still not looking at him. "I'm really sorry Adrian."
"I know. Relax first. I'm going to help father preparing your dinner."
Before he can go, I ask him a question.
"Can I call Riri? I want to know if she's okay."
He's silent. I peeked at him. I saw hesitation in his eyes... Why?
"It's night time. Kristine is probably sleeping by now."
"Then I will just text her to let her know that I'm okay."
"Maybe you can do it tomorrow. You need to eat and rest. I'm going now."
"Wai—!"
He hastily left the room, not even giving me a chance to say one word.
THAT is really suspicious. Why was he so adamant at not letting me talk to Riri?
...Is it papa? It's probably papa. Ugh! Why is he so urgh... protective?!
I am not made of glass! Just because Riri was with me when that happen, it's her fault? She just want me to have some fun!
He knows that I'll want to know what happend to Riri that's why he ordered Ari to not let me talk to her. It's just like what happened years ago. I knew it. I just knew it.
I hate this. I hate how suffocating this is. I hate myself that I'm sick. All I want is a normal life for at least a year. Can't he hold his protectiveness? I made a wish. My only wish. He agreed to made a deal. He agreed.
. . .
. . .
. . .
All this emotions... It's tiring. I'm tired.
Why am I not used to this? Does months of being free made me forget how I used to live?
Perhaps it does. Perhaps, having a friend does this to a person. My friend who only want what she thought I need at that time.
Maybe if I refused going out, if I became firm at disagreeing to Riri at that time, this will never happen. Maybe if I just informed Norvyn at what we're doing, if I only answered Ari's call and I didn't panicked, I'm still free.
What ifs... It's too late to change decision and regret mistakes.
The beeping of the automatic door brought me out of my thoughts.
It's Ari and Norvyn, pushing a trolley cart with my dinner on the top towards me.
No one spoke. There's no need to. The two calmly set up the bed table on my lap.
I ate in silence. Adrian is beside me, doing his assignments. If I have my supplies too, I am probably going to do it. But then doing an assignment especially if it's hard, can make you want to throw it in the trash can so you will never see it again.
Norvyn... I don't know what he's doing. He's just... standing there. If there is another chair that he can sit on, I will ask him to sit because standing for a long time is hard and tiring.
Hmmm, maybe he's used to it. I mean, he always stands beside papa if he's at home.
"I'm done eating." I said.
Norvyn took the plate and put it back to the trolley cart. He then came to me and organized my bed which I declined. I can do it by myself thank you.
Norvyn sent Ari home, saying that he have school tomorrow.
"Norvyn?" I called.
"Yes young master?" He looked at me, waiting for what I am going say.
"Can you bring me my phone? I want to watch some videos." It's not a lie. I plan to watch some silly cat videos to de-stress but it's not the whole truth either. I'll try to sneak a text message to Riri. I highly doubt that she's asleep at this time. Knowing her, she's not planning to sleep early.
"I'm afraid I can't do that young master."
"Why? Is it because of papa?"
"It is half of the reason I can't young master. The other one is because your father have your phone with him."
"What?! He can't do that! That's mine!"
"He said that he will give it to you after you recover. He don't want any disturbance to interrupt your recovery."
"How can a phone interrupt my—it's just a phone! It can't kill me."
"I'm sorry young master." He bowed his head.
"Sigh. Forget it, you can leave now. I want to rest." It maybe a cold thing to say but my tired brain can't be bother with manners right now.
He nodded. "If there is something you need, you can press the button beside your bed." He pointed at a red button on the top of the table. Oh, I didn't know that that's there.
After a few seconds of comfortable silence, Norvyn offered a light smile. "Good night young master."
I forced a tired smile. "Good night Norvyn."