Kira POV
I have no idea what came over me... But the next thing I know, I'm attacking Christian. Or should I say, this wolf? A living, breathing, big-ass angry wolf staring at me from way across the room. Well would ya look at that, I already don't like wolves.
This is my first time seeing a wolf in real life and I really wasn't looking forward to meeting any either. I didn't know what to expect when our werewolves side activated but I sure as fuck wasn't expecting this. I wasn't looking forward to being trapped in a room with an actual wolf.
I don't know much about wolves and by the looks of this one, I'm assuming they're not exactly cuddly creatures that likes to lick your face and play fetch. I have a feeling that the only fetch Christian wants to play is with my organs.
How can one thing looks so attractive, yet terrifying at the same time? Either way, I am not attracted nor terrified of him. I'm pissed... crossed... infuriated on another level. I wanna rip something, then put it back together, then rip it to shreds, over and over again.
There was a time when I was worried he was dead, wondering the type of stuffs they were doing to him down here. Then I learned that he wanted to get tortured, he wanted to feel pain because that's just him; he's complicated. Now this stupid moon is just making things a lot more complicated than it already was.
Right now, I'm no longer human at all nor vampire. I'm a wolf. A big hairy wolf as far as I can see, I wonder if I look as good as him? I shake my head huffing and puffing trying to get rid of my newly ballistic thoughts.
A part of me feels comfortable in this skin. I feel warm and protected but apart from that, I feel like I have no control over my own emotions.
This is fucked up; I cannot think about anything else but killing him. Deep down I don't want to, but I also feel like I'm not in control of my own body anymore. I can think like a human but my body refuses to act like one.
If this is the case, then why do I feel so comfortable in the flesh of a wolf? My mind is thinking this and my body wants to that, leaving my other nerves confused as fuck. Like Kira! Make up your goddamn mind, stupid!
This is what being a monster feels like.. I'm a fucking monster and the worst thing about it, is I actually think I like it. Usually I wouldn't but I don't even know who I am anymore.
I have to give in to the feeling.
I have to accept the fact that human me and wolf me is completely different and there's nothing I can do about it than accept it, because that's just how it is. Trying to change one might result in the other being destroyed.
Fuck it! We can just blame everything on the moon later..... That is, if we both survive.
I growl and attack it clawing at his gut. That's when his eyes start turning red... Like blood red. Whoopsie
Maybe I shouldn't have done that. Uh oh
He kick me so hard causing me to fall way on the other side of the room. Ow. He gets up and starts glaring at me, there's nothing in those eyes but anger and rage and damn, I can't even pretend like I'm not nervous because I am; His eye are furious. I can tell he's having a battle in his head trying to not kill me on the spot. I know I am.
What is happening to us?
Christian is the only guy I've ever trust.
The only guy I feel 100% comfortable around.
The guy I can't get out of my head since the very day I walked into Stanford.
The absolutely handome, hot, grey eyed guy with the incredibly sexy spanish accent, I kissed in my dorm room.
The guy that changed my life completely.
But right now... A huge part of me wants to kill this guy and a part of me still doesn't want to hurt him.
And by the look in his eyes... He's probably going to kill me.
What am I suppose to do now? If I don't kill him, he's going to kill me and if I kill him then there's a huge possibility that I'm going to live forever regretting it. Forever...
Forever does seems like a very long time now... because it is. A very very long time.
Again, fuck it! Hit me with your best shot Christian.. I charge at him with every strength in my big ol' hairy body clawing him at every angle.. I really hope he fights back.. I really want him to fight back.
And he does...
This time it's worse. He push me over and grips me so hard in my back, I can actually feel his wolf claws deep inside of me. Fuck! I guess that's his warning. Yes Christian.. I'm very aware of what you're capable of.
He hops on top of me, dropping me so hard I swear I heard my bones crack. Godammit.
Then he does the last thing I expects him to do.
He roars... A very loud muthafucking roar. This is not just some ordinary wolf roar... It's fucking terrifying. For the very first time since I came back to life... I feel scared.
My ears starts bleeding and my body trembles in fear. I feel weak, powerless, belittled. He marches over to me and even though my mind wants to stand still and... I don't know, be brave, my body is afraid of him.
Unaware of what's going to happen next, I whine backing away from him. Now I know why everyone is so afraid of him.
What is he doing to me?
His enraging red eyes pierce through my supposedly wolf eyes. Human me wasn't afraid of the Christian that was nice to me but was in fact curious about the Christian I didn't know... Vampire me was only around him for a couple of minutes... Wolf me on the other hand, wolf me apparently has a mind of it's own. A mind that I cannot control.
I can't explain what's happening, but the next thing I know, I feel my brain automatically shuts down. So does my entire body.
Fuck you moon
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Ugh, well isn't this fantastic. Here I am waking up again for the fourth time since I got my life back. I look down to see myself in my original human form, well I'm relieve to know I'm not an angry wolf anymore but I'm still an angry lady. Ney lady makes me feel old. It doesn't matter, an angry lady is more dangerous than a quiet pitbull.
"Where is he?" I growl.
"Calm down would you" Alli breathe out. Calm down?. How dare she tells me to calm down!! And why the fuck am I chain to a wall like I'm some goddamn animal?!!!...
'Because you are a goddamn animal'.
Stfu subconscious
So I remember everything from last time. How I attacked Christian.. Multiple times... And he knocked me out? With a roar? Can somebody please explain to me what the fuck happened to me.
This is basically the second day of my life, I'm supposed to be happy.
Damn, happy is such a weird word to me now. I can't even remember the last time I've been happy
I've been through a lot and I have a feeling that I haven't even felt the worst yet and believe me, I don't know what's worst than being attacked by an invisible creature in the middle of nowhere, being kidnapped and tortured by hunters that enjoyed stabbing blades in my leg, and being attack by a raging wolf, all in one fucking day.
"Are you gonna answer my question?" I grunt. Okay what's up with me? Whatever I don't care. I'm pissed and I have the right to be. Christian Remoné in his big black and greyish wolf form knocked me out, how dare he!
"I have him chain up in another room" she breathe out. Um why? "The moon died down like two hours ago... But I still don't trust you guys.... Especially you."
Wait! Tf she means by 'especially you'? I am way nicer than Christian.
"What happened last night?" I mutter.
"Well Saucy.." she said exaggerating the nickname. Yo I know I got an attitude but 'Saucy'? Seriously? What kind of dumbass nickname is that?
"Last night I did one of the dumbest thing ever by leaving two vicious wolves in a room together without any way of either of you getting out... *Cough* my bad".
Breathe Kira. Breathe
"As I was saying... Christian is a wolf and wolves have their ways of getting into each other's head. Obviously you're an amateur and he's very powerful so it was easy for him to belittle you. When he roared his very annoying roar, it was initially suppose to signal me to put him out of his misery.. But.." she looked down at me, "it apparently put you out of your misery too."
I get it. He can easily destroy me.
"When I arrived I saw your lifeless human body on the ground with Christian wolf's body getting ready to claw the shit out of you.... So I guess I can say 'i got there right on time'" she breathe out "okay so long story short.. I shot him with a couple powerful doses of wolfbanes before he could finish you off completely and then hurt my pretty little face." Don't flatter yourself
Well would ya look at that... He was going to kill me.
And he would have if it wasn't for Alli. She might've stabbed me but she was also the one that saved me from getting clawed to death. Even if I wanted to thank her for all that, my mouth is too stubborn to let out the words.
"I want to see him," I mutter loud enough for her to hear. Eh, I am definitely not thinking about getting revenge. Fingers cross
"Yeah well he doesn't want to see you," she said walking towards the door.
"What the fuck do you mean he doesn't want to see me!!??? And where tf do you think you're going??!" I shout. Angry Kira is out and not in the mood for games.
"It means he's not ready to face you yet..." she sighs in a duh tone, "And as for the second question, I'm going to get you some blood to calm you down before I'm force to knock you out again."
I really am hungry. But what does she mean, 'he's not ready to face me yet?' Is he avoiding me?
Well of course he's avoiding me, he almost killed me last night.
To be fair... I would've killed him if he didn't react so I guess we're even. I don't blame him for avoiding me. Look at me!! I'm a damn mess.
She gives me a faint smile and walk out the door..
I need blood now before I completely lose my mind... Again
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2 hours later
Where tf this girl at?
Is she trying to starve me to death or smth? Or does she want me to feed on her instead?! I'm starting to get a little tipsy here. I doubt Vampires can feed from Vampires, if that's the case then it means I can actually feed from myself. No ew.
It's either I'm imagining or I can actually here footsteps outside the room. It wouldn't be the first my mind does something like that but I don't have time to be delusional or stupid.
"Yo if y'all don't give me blood right muthafucking now I swear to God I'm gonna____"
"Calmarse, Choco" (calm down) this boy walks in with a big ass smirk on his face.
Wtf Christian!?? This boy almost killed me last night, told his sister he's not ready to face and now walks in with a damn smirk!!!!
I don't know why he thinks he has the right to call me Choco again after he did what he did. Hmmm, now I have something to hold against him forever. There's no way I'm gonna just let it slide, whether or not he can feel guilt, I'm gonna always remind him of the time he almost killed me.
"Thought you were avoiding me," I mumble.
There's nothing I want more than to be mad at him right now... But it's sooooo freaking hard when he looks like... That. Ugh
"Well...." he shrugs walking over to me, "that was 2 hours ago."
Is he serious?
He is serious.
Jerk
I roll my eyes and try to stare at anything else but him. Believe me, it's a lot harder than it seems.
He knows damn well what I'm trying to do, that's why he keeps staring at me, he's doing it on purpose, like he always is. He laughs and I glare at him. I wish my middle finger could move right now.
"Sooo..." I sigh glancing at him, "are you gonna unchain me or what?"
I'm really tired of this chain shit... I mean for God's sake!! 'If you're not Christian Grey... don't fucking chain me up'.
"I will... Soon" he smirks. I think he's enjoying this scene a little bit too much. "That is, if you promise to behave".
Again, is he trying to be funny or does he really expect me to behave? I feel like he's treating me like a child.
He likes seeing me like this. Chained up, helpless, annoyed, blah blah blah.
"I promise" I whisper with a little seductive smile.
"Aww darling, regardless of how hot this situation makes you look right now, even though you're always annoyingly hot..." He smirks. He thinks I'm hot., well I already knew I was hot but still... he said it out loud. "I'm too smart for that shit".
"I literally had to beg Alli to unchain me because she was afraid I'd go all wolfman on her... And she also doesn't feel comfortable around you because you're apparently 'dangerous', so she had to let me go, so that I can deal with you and you're little attitude" he said exaggerating on 'dangerous'. Me? Dangerous? Uh no, I'm completely harmless.
"So what? you don't trust me?" I ask him with a fake pout. "Ofcourse not.. I still have scars that are yet to heal on my chest and back to prove why." Well he may or may not have a point.
"Oh please Christian, you knocked me out. So basically you owe me!"
"No Love.. We're even," he smirk.
"Okay fine, can you at least gimme some blood."
"Uh I'll have to think about that," he said smirking again.. oh hell no
"Listen to me asshole!!! You might be one handsome muthafucker and all but no one fucking mess with me and my food okay !!!" I shout, "and when I say 'gimme some blood' it wasn't entirely a a question okay... It was more like an offer, a simple 'get me some blood' or I will fucking take it myself, OKAYYY!!!"
He was the one that brought me into this life so It's still his job to protect whether or not I can protect myself. Therefore he's definitely supposed to be nice to me.
I kinda expects him to simply get me what I want so I can just calm the fuck down. It's very simple, feed me and I shut the fuck up.
But no.
He's here laughing his ass off. "Ya know.. you look really cute when you're angry", He said in between his laugh.
God please send me an angel
"Woo put those away.. We don't want a repeat of what happened last night do we?" He said with a very serious expression.
I soon realize he's talking about my now expose fangs and claws. "Christian please.. " I breathe out. Trying to calm down so they can go back in. After a couple seconds they disappear. Well atleast that works. Glad to something listens to me.
My anger issue's back. As a matter of fact, this is one thing that's stuck with me forever, whether I like it or not.
"Fine I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere," he said laughing at the last part. That's not even remotely funny.
He knows damn well that I can't break these fuckimg chains. He sped out of the room so fast the only thing I saw was the door slam. Honestly, I would be surprised if he bring me a glass of red wine instead.
Sigh
The smell of blood caught me off guard.. Didn't expect him to be back so fast. He walks in with a couple blood bags. "Did you miss me?". "Boy, you were gone for less than 2 minutes,"
"C'mon are you trying to tell me you didn't miss my handsome face?" He said walking over to me with em' big ass smirk.
Don't flatter yourself
"You're not even that handsome," I grunt. I wish that was true... or do I?
The thirst for blood is affecting me more than his snarky jokes right now.
He laughs and grab the end of one of the chains with one hand and rip it completely off my arm and proceed to do the same to the other. "How comes you couldn't do that last night?" I asked rubbing my wrist. This is just proof of how freaking strong he is.
Now that I think about it, how the hell did the hunters managed to chain his arms? It's obvious he could've easily broke those damn chains. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't have broken mine, so I guess I'm a wimp compared to him.
If Alli wasn't trapped down there with me, I don't know how the fuck I would've have gotten out.
"Because I didn't want to, duhh," he said throwing one of the blood bags towards me. Not gonna lie, I don't know what's more attractive than Christian saying 'duhh'.
Blood!!! Yayyy!!!
I grab the bag so quickly I'm surprise it doesn't burst and quickly gulp it down in less than 5 seconds. "More" I growl at him. He throw it to me and I quickly drink it too. Guess I really was starving. Or maybe I really am greedy. Both
"Better?" He asks staring at me like I'm some greedy chick.. Which I kinda am. "You could've given it to me a long time ago ya know."
"And miss the chance of meeting angry Kira.. Nah" he smirks.
"You're unbelievable," I said rolling my eyes. "You're welcome by the way," he says with his sinister grin. Yeah right
*coughs*
"Alright, let's go."
"Where are we going?" I ask confused.
"To hunt.. Or should I just say kill?" He walks off smirking.
"Either sounds fine to me," I smile walking off behind him. "Ooooh I think I like this Kira more," he whisper stopping abruptly in front of me causing me to bump into his back.
He turns around grabbing my wrist before I could even move, now we're facing each other. "Be careful chica.... We don't want you falling for me now?" He winks looking down at me. Why the fuck he gotta be so handsome? Ugh
Falling for him isn't going to be a problem... I hope
Isn't this the same Christian that told me he loved me before I die?.
Neither of us is trying to move, we're just standing here staring at each other.
I hate being so close to him, it brings back memories.
His grey eyes scan the look on my face like he's trying to figure out what I'm thinking. I swear if he can read minds, I'm screwed. *coughs* look away Kira.
"Um sooo..." I clear my throat, "Uh who are we going to kill?" I ask trying desperately to change the subject before the moment gets lot more complicated.
He didn't answer right away..
"Someone has Lisa."
"Oh, gotta be that witch bitch that called me a bitch," I growl.. I really wanna kill that bitch
He raise an eyebrow and I shrug it off. I don't have time to explain everything to him. "Yeah well we gotta find her before Alli goes crazy."
"Vamanos chico.. We have people to kill, " and with that I sped out the room in front of him.