Kira POV
There were time when I'd usually sit by my window during the rain and think about what it would be like if something serious would've happen to me at the time. Would I be missed or would people actually be glad I'm gone? Something about the rain always seems to calm me down and have me thinking about my then pitiful life. The scent always intrigue me and the sound it made on the roof was like a lullaby that usually put me to sleep even when I didn't want to.
There were times when I'd run out in the middle of a storm just so I can play in the rain with no one to stop me because no one was ever there. It is normal for children wanting to play in the rain but for some reason I knew it wasn't normal for a 9 year old to crave the sound of thunder to fall asleep.
I remember watching the snow fall and wonder what it would like if I fell off a building, the same way the snow fell from the sky. I wasn't suicidal but I usually wished I wasn't here.
Scared, lonely and abandoned. That's how I felt on a daily basis after my aunt took me away from my parents or should I say, when my parents gave me away? It doesn't matter but it does.
You will never know how hard it is to lose someone until they're gone and you realize that you might never get them back. That's when it hurts the most, because you realize that you've lost someone you can never replace and that's when you really miss the times you took for granted because now you can never have them back.
That's how I feel about my parents. Not my biological parents, whoever they are, but the parents that showed me love for 8 years. I will never be able look at them the same way I used to and I barely even remember them. Will I ever see them again? Do they even want to see me? I get it. They gave me away so I could have a better life but I never stopped missing them. I couldn't even if I wanted to. According to them, I was too young to know what I wanted. They couldn't have been more wrong, all I wanted was a family. All I wanted was to be around people that are actually happy to have me in their lives.
I always thought there was something wrong with me.
My aunt brought me here but she was never there. Sometimes I thought she was avoiding me because she'd left me for days and each time she'd come up with excuses that are way worse than admitting she was avoiding me. I was alone with my thoughts everyday because I had no one to talk to. I was never the one to talk to my friends about my problems because I didn't have any. Even if I did speak to my aunt, she'd say things like, "You're okay, don't worry about it" or "it's gonna be okay, you're just overreacting" or "look on the bright side". That's not what I wanted hear, I wanted the truth.
Adina and Shawn were the only persons that actually loved me. My brothers always treated me like sister, because that's what they thought I was. I do wanna know the truth about my real parents, but there's no way I'm going to just forget the ones that read me bedtime stories and taught me my first words.
Everybody lied and kept secrets and pretended to be somebody they weren't and I didn't know if I was the problem or if the world just sucked.
My emotions and thoughts constantly ate me alive everyday. I used to talk to myself and kept diaries because I could've never admitted it to anybody else but myself, that I actually needed help.
Growing up, people treated me differently. They always thought I was troubled. My brothers always stood up for me and my parents always argued with them. Now that I think about, did they stood up for because the others were right? Or did they actually care about me? Just a list of things I'll probably never know.
"Are you gonna um.. Say something?" Christian asked staring at the ceiling. He's always staring at the ceiling, like boy you're handsome, lemme see. Blind me with that beauty woulda ya. Ha, I'm just kidding... or not.
I sighed trying my best to ignore his beauty but it's like he's doing it on purpose. Like he's deliberately trying to compel me with his good looks, ravishing hair, and 'wow' body. Eh, it's not gonna work buddy. It is sooo not gonna work.
For some reason, everyone here fears him. I remember the looks everyone gave me when he escorted me to my room. The girls or women, who knows how old they are, glared at me like I was some intruder they'd happily get rid of. He walked like he held all the power and no one dared to say anything. It doesn't matter what they think of me though, as long as they doesn't try to kill me, I'll be fine.
The look on their faces quickly disappeared whenever he looked their way. Everyone was afraid of him and I looked like an ant by his side. It was like they were taking a risk by just looking at him. Oh boy, I wouldn't want to be his enemy nor get on his bad side.
Anyway... If Christian knew my grandmother doesn't that make him over 60?. Oh wait I forgot.. Vampires don't age.
But that still doesn't make any sense. In 'The Vampire Diaries', vampires stopped ageing the day they were turned but Christian was born a vampire. Huh? If I wasn't confused asf before, I sure am now.
There's so much things I wanna say right now, not to mention the questions I have for him. "How old are you?" I finally asked. He laughed a bit and walks over towards the fridge, my fridge. "A couple centuries". Is this dude serious?!. Even his laugh is attractive, ugh c'mon.
He looks like the type of guy most girls secretly desire and the type of guy your mother warns you about everyday and every night and would go as far as locking you in a tower like Rapunzel if you ever speaks to him.
"Ugh really," he mumbled. He rolled his eyes closing the fridge and sat back beside me on the bed. Yo why the hell is he acting like he owns the place?!. "Gotta be more specific, white boy," I scoffed rolling my eyes at him. "Diez siglos". (ten centuries).
So I guess he stopped ageing at 18. I'm not even gonna question it. This is too much for me.
Then it hits me. Christian said he first met Yvonne, my grandmother, when he was ten years old. Shit.. That means that my grandmother would've been a thousand years old now.
I breathed out and lay back on my pillow. All this talking and listening made me forgot that I haven't ate in like 9 hours. Usually I'd eat 24/7 because duhh! I'm a girl but lately, I've lost my appetite. The headmaster assigned one of his supervisors to bring my food to me whenever they think I'm hungry or feeling peckish. It's not as bad as it sounds, they can actually cook. Shocking ik.
"What happened to her?". His face is always emotionless whenever he speaks about his past. Was she that important to him?. "She died on the night you were born," he didn't even looked at me when he spoke. I guess he doesn't want me to read his emotions, it's obvious he doesn't feel bad about it. I doubt he feels bad about anything. He probably knew what I was gonna ask next because he sighed and continue "When I turned 19, I stopped aging and that was when I met Yvonne again. She was pregnant with your mother. She told me everything about her encounter with a werewolf and how she got pregnant," he explains. "According to her, she was madly inlove with that man. I didn't have any problem with him, he was an okay guy. He was always there to chain me up on full moons, so I could control my transition... Long story short my father found out that his vampire son was actually half werewolf and made his plan to kill all the werewolves his sick, twisted mind could find, including his own blood. I guess he didn't knew my mother was a werewolf when he was with her. Yvonne and my sister managed to help me escape him that was actually how we got to the this country, but unfortunately, you're grandfather didn't made it," his smile died down at the last sentence, yet again he doesn't look guilty.
I'm used to losing people, it's a part of life. You don't always have to be dead to be gone. Sometimes all it takes to be dead to somebody is one silly, irreversible mistake. You'd be surprised to know how quickly someone can actually replace you.
When you ain't worth shit, people tend to forget about you easily.
But when you're gone, you can always come back. When you're dead, you really are dead. No matter how many times you'd hope and wish that someday you'd wake up and see them, you never will. It's not always easy to accept but it is what it is.
My grandfather died. I want to cry but I can't, I'm not much of a crybaby. Also, if my grandfather was a werewolf, then it means that my birth mom is or was a werewolf too.. So um where do I stand in this equation exactly? Lol maybe I'm an elf that turns into a vampire at night. K that doesn't make any sense.
"Two days after Wallace death, your mom was born. Blah blah blah, 983 years after, she got pregnant with you. During all those years, Yvonne and I haven't contacted at all. A part of me believed that she blamed me for Wallace death," he said rolling over so we're facing each other. "Anywayyy... I've always kept a close eye on your mom. No matter what happened between me and Yvonne, I'd always keep my promise to protect you. Little did I know your mother was banging a vampire. Most Vampires can't procreate naturally, that was when I found out that Yvonne use her magic on your mom and her lover and all of a sudden, she was pregnant with you,".
I wasn't exactly born then. My biological parents didn't exactly want me, it was all Yvonne, it was all my grandmother. I was created. My parents never wanted a child, but she wanted a grandchild. My theory is, Yvonne wanted my mom to be with a werewolf so they could reproduce but my birth mom fell in love with the wrong species. So therefore, she took it upon herself to use her magic to get what she wanted. Don't get me wrong... I'm glad to be here but what she did was selfish and having their D.N.A doesn't make them my family.
Woah woah. A werewolf and a vampire is my parents.. So technically I'm a.... Freaking hybrid.. Oh holy shit!. I don't know if I should be freaking out or exult.
"Christian I'm a_____" he cut me off before I could even finish. "Choco, there's more.. The night you were born Yvonne cast a spell to conceal your identity. She didn't want you to grow up being a monster like your mother and father and especially me. Back then survival skills were simple... You either kill or be killed," he chuckled. I hate the look in his eyes everytime he talks about killing. It's like he enjoys it, a lot, like a lot.
It's not hard to believe that a guy this handsome is actually a cold blooded murderer. He does look like the leader of an Italian Mafia or a Mexican drug lord. Now that think about it, I wonder if he is? It's more than possible, who knows the type of things he've done during his thousand years of life.
The thought of asking him to show me his fangs crossed my mind once or twice or maybe 10 times but I wanna enjoy this side of him for a while, because I know it probably won't last long.
I do not like where this is going. "You were suppose to live a human life until the day you die. When you die.. Your true powers will be revive and you'll come back supernatural,". Oh boy. " The spell was too strong for Yvonne alone to handle... So to complete the spell, she had to sacrifice her life." I really want to believe that she was a good person, I really do.
What's the point of creating me, if you don't want me to be apart of the same world you created me in? Huh? My parents weren't humans, she knew exactly the type of person they were when she took it upon herself to 'blessed' them with a child. Did you she expected an Angel to pop out of her daughter's vagina? No. She knew exactly what she was doing. She knew exactly the type of person she was creating.
She had them all fooled. She planned all this.
I'm not gonna just believe that she actually cared for me because she didn't. You don't hurt the people you care about unless you're gonna be there to help them heal through the pain.
What if I'm wrong though? My eyes became all bubbly and shit thinking about the many possibilities and I feel like I wanna burst down and cry but as much as this hurts to know, I can't force myself to cry, she doesn't deserve my tears, none of them does. She sacrificed herself for me so I could stay human. She went through all that just so I wouldn't be apart of her world. The world that i'm now drawn to more than anything else.
"There's more. Before she took her last breath," he took in a deep breath "She transferred all her magic to you,".
Holy mother of Jesus.
"I'm a fucking hybrid with witch powers?" I screamed at him in shock.
"Ah my God child, are you trying to destroy my eardrum?!" he growl rubbing his ear obviously annoyed. "And by the way, it's called a tribrid, pretty sure you've already heard of it in movies or books or whatever humans use these days."
Wtf.
Bullcrap. She didn't sacrificed herself, she wanted to die. She transferred all her goddamn magic to me and then die because she wanted me to carry her legacy or some shit like that. To be honest, that's the story I wanna believe.
People can be so fucking selfish sometimes. As far as I can see, Madam Grandmother already decided my faith.
Do I really want to be apart of this life though? There has to be a reason why Yvonne made it so complicated, like she legit set me up to die. So, I guess she really doesn't want me to be apart of this world and I get it. This world is dangerous and so are most of these people. I'm surrounded by werewolves, vampires and witches, not Angels and genies.
All my life I believed, I was human and now, i'm a tribrid. How do they expect me to process this? I've been lied to my entire life.
I need a glass of wine.. Like a really really big bottle of wine. A whole bucket of tequila perhaps.
So basically now I'm 50% vampire and 50% werewolf and um... What percent witch exactly?. Eh, this is too much. I can't even do math anymore.
I've always wanted to be a vampire but I can't even control being bipolar, how exactly am I suppose to control being a tribrid?
"I don't understand," I whisper trying to not choke on my own breath. "Look Kira, I brought you here to protect you. Some very bad people found out about your abilities and made it their mission to kill you," he warned with a very stern face. "Why do they want to kill me?" I asked nervously. "Because they can't absorb your powers while you're human," he said. "And killing you in a certain way might even lead to your dead... permanently." Things just keep getting better and better, like there's a bounty on my head kind of better. Like, THEY'RE PEOPLE TRYING TO KILL ME BETTER.
I've been through a lot and yet the worst is yet to come. My pain and the things I've went through made me stronger. All my acts and suicidal thoughts went on for 4 years. I was lost and I found myself by accepting the fact that I am indeed, crazy.
Since Ohio, I was never the one to mess with. I can be smart, beautiful, arrogant, nice and rich but in the end I could also be a bitch. It all depends on you. My emotions change 24/7, sometimes I wanna beat a bitch, then sometimes I wanna jump out of a plane.
Yvonne didn't just give me her magic, she also gave me her crazy and bitchiness.
Now that I think about it, I was fucking stupid back then. I wanted to die and shit lol. According to the people back in Jamaica, I was troubled. And according to those back in Ohio when I finally started highschool again, I was a crazy bitch. So I guess it's fair to say that I'm a 'troubled crazy bitch'. I like it. Ya know it has a ring to it.
So,
a) I die. Transition work out correctly and I wake up as a tribrid.
Or b) I die. Transition work out incorrectly and I die. Permanently
Oh boy
Fml.