The journey to Xander's place wasn't the most comfortable. Everyone in the car could feel the emotions rolling off me in waves even as I pretended to be okay. My whole world and everything I thought I knew was being tested every which way. It was a nightmare and we couldn't get to the end quickly enough for me.
When we finally arrived, Nat immediately jumped out with my backpack while Canaan carried the basket and they dashed straight into the pack house leaving Xander to deal with me. Not liking the fact that everyone was walking on eggshells around me, I faced Xander immediately and asked, "Aren't you going to try and get away from me too?"
He gave me a warm smile before he replied, "They weren't running away from you and even if they were, I wouldn't do that to you. Never". "Yeah that's what you'll say now", I replied disbelievingly. "Wait till you get fed up with me too".
"You're my mate", he replied gently. "I can get fed up with any other person not you. I literally can't get enough of you so how do I get fed up with you when I've waited such a long time to finally have you."
His words were compelling me to believe them but I didn't know what to believe anymore. As if sensing my hesitation, he opened the door and made his way to my side to do the same, then he placed his hand on mine and said convincingly, "Come on, let's try and see how you get me fed up with you."
With our hands linked together, we made our way to the pack house disregarding the wary looks we got along the way. When we finally made it to the Lycan floor of the pack house, Xander led me to the last room on that floor and it turned out to be his room. How I knew, well his scent bathed me the minute I entered the room, it was like walking into a Xander custom perfume factory. Everything smelled like him.
The room was massive and well furnished, looking like a mix of worlds. The king sized bed took up the center of the room with massive windows on the far left side while two dark doors took up the opposite end, I'm guessing one led to the closet while the other led to the bathroom. The walls were painted white and the floors were covered in black and white carpet with a plush rug surrounding the bed.
He had antiques hanging everywhere in his room, an eighteenth century vase, various paintings on one side of his room, a hallway that I'm guessing led to an office. A vinyl player and records on a nearby table opposite his bed. The bed itself was a work of art. White sheets, white comforters, and varying colored pillows.
I don't know who came up with the concept for his room but as chaotic as it sounds, it came together nicely and I could tell, this had a woman's touch somewhere. Probably his sister, or a girlfriend, my subconscious added.
I shut it down immediately. My head was already a mess, if I allow the demons in my head free reign, well, today will go down for me in history as May Day then. While I was trying to calm the noise in my head I heard Xander behind me moving a few things only to turn and find him with my backpack.
The noise ceased instantly as confusion set in, "Uh, what are you doing with my pack?" He looked dumbfounded for a second or two and then, "I think Natalie didn't know where to put it after taking the contents out. So I was about to do that, put it away."
"Well, if she took the contents out", I started while trying to put two and two together. "Why didn't she just put the bag in her closet with the rest of my stuff?" Now it was his turn to look confused, "Your things are not in her closet" "then where are they?" I asked. "In mine", he replied straightway.
"Uh… why am I things in your closet?" I asked. "Because you're staying here with me", he replied as if that reply was basic sense. "What make you think I'm staying here with you?" I asked skeptically. Before he could reply, we heard a knock at the door. "Hold that thought will you", he replied and then made his way to the door.
I moved closer to the bed to take a seat since my legs were beyond tired of standing. I heard the door open and then close and almost immediately perceived a new scent. Whoever it was at the door, the person came in and is still inside the room.
As if to confirm my thoughts I heard footsteps and finally they came into view, Xander and the girl from my vision of the attack on his pack.
She was even more beautiful in real life, with flashing eyes and red hair she tied in a ponytail. She was slim with long limbs that were wrapped in a blue romper, and her whole being glowed, it was incredible. I don't know what it was but being in her presence made me feel comfortable and at peace, almost as if she had a control over my emotions.
Then she smiled and walked towards me on slim heels that could put a dent in a man's head but she wore it with ease and walked it with poise. The minute she was close enough, she pulled me up into a hug and suddenly I remembered my thought the first time I met Nat, she might look slim but she had a strong grip.
I could barely breathe from how tight her hold on me was and when she finally let go, I took in much needed gulps of oxygen. "I am so happy to meet you awake", she said excitedly. I couldn't speak yet due to my pipes still trying to regulate my breathing and only gave her a small smile and a quick nod.
Xander always intuitive, moved closer to me and place his hand on my back rubbing up and down gently as he introduced us. "Asha, meet my little sister Lilith", he gestured towards her with his free hand, "and Lilith meet my mate, Asha."
"Your sister?" I finally managed to ask. He looked at me with a warm smile and then nodded in agreement. That took me by surprise. So his sister was the one I saw in my vision, the one who had sent me with an urgent message and a warning for him.
"Now that you're here", Lilith began excitedly, "we can begin your training in earnest. And because I'm also special just like you, Xander has agreed that I'll handle your special training."
"Special like me?" I queried. "Yeah", she replied brightly. Before I could ask what she meant exactly, Xander proceeded to explain everything to me. If I thought the history lessons I had taken so far were explicit… I was just scratching the surface.
"Lilith is a Sybil", Xander said by way of explanation. "A what?" I asked promptly. "A Sybil", he replied. "They are more or less the mouth piece of the goddess among us. Lily here is extra special because she's the first one we've had in centuries and the only one in this century."
"Why the only one?" I enquired. "Isn't it possible another one has been born somewhere else?" "It's not possible", he replied assuredly. "There can only be one Sybil in a century". "Sybil, that means what exactly?" I probed further. "It means she can communicate the prophecies from the moon to us and guide us through the path the goddess has laid for us."
"Just as she was doing in my vision the other night at the party right?" I asked. He looked shocked to hear that. "She was in your vision that night?" He asked bewildered. "Yes she was", I replied. "She was also the one who gave me the warning I forgot to give you". "What warning?" he asked carefully.
"Get Xander immediately. He needs to know. Please tell him the harbingers have begun, it's time to locate the 'niveum lupa'. Tell him he needs to come home immediately. Tell him NOW!!!!!!!" he was shell-shocked.
"That's what she told me in the dream", I replied gently. "I didn't tell you then because it seemed like a sensitive issue and you didn't know anything about my abilities so there was no way to tell you without exposing myself plus Nixa got there almost at the same time."
He took a deep breath with his eyes closed and then gently exhaled it through his mouth. When he opened his eyes, they were calm. "I get why you didn't tell me", he said softly. "What I don't get is why you didn't tell me about this the minute I got home", he said directly to her.
"It was not my place to do so", she replied unapologetically. "The message I gave to her was not from my conscious but my subconscious. It only got to her because she was the one closest to you then. That was her duty not mine."
Hearing those words from her mouth made me feel inadequate and irresponsible. I had failed even the simplest of tasks given to me at a dire point in time because I was selfishly putting myself first, just like I always have and I'm still doing, even with my mom now.
It was the rudest wakeup call ever. To think I had been blaming everyone around me for my misfortunes and haven't even considered thinking about the entire situation from others point of view. My body suddenly felt weak and I wavered and would have fallen if Xander hadn't caught me immediately.
"Hey", he said gently as he helped me take a seat by the edge of the bed. My guilt was going to eat me alive, I knew that now. I also knew I had to find a way to fix the mess I created by being unreasonable. "Hey look at me", Xander pleaded softly.
I struggled to comply since I felt so ashamed of myself. Who would ever want to be with a selfish mate, not to talk of one who's being hunted and yet can't appreciate what everyone around her has been doing to keep her safe. Beating myself up didn't help my situation and before I knew I had tears in my eyes. Tears I tried to hold back but failed, and then they began flowing fluidly like rivers down my face.
Without another word, Xander wrapped his arms around me and let me cry out my guilt. He sat gingerly beside me on the bed, moving his hand gently up and down my back in a soothing way. I don't know what ever possessed the moon goddess when she paired Xander and I as mates but I was beyond grateful for it even though I knew I was undeserving of it.
I don't know when Lilith left the room, but when I lifted my head to look over Xander���s shoulders, she was no longer in the room. "God, I feel drained and pretty stupid", I said tiredly over Xander's shoulder.
He pulled back gently with a smile on his face, "Come on, you're not stupid but you're pretty though". I couldn't help but smile at his comment. He was the perfect remedy every single time and I was already getting dependent on him. I still don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the warning I received", I apologized. "It's no big deal", he replied softly. "I completely understand why". "I'm sorry for being so selfish and inconsiderate", I apologized again, just needing it to be out there. "No need to be sorry for anything", he dismissed.
"You were hurt and hurt people lash out most times from their place of pain so I get it and your mom does too. You were not trying to be inconsiderate or selfish, you were just speaking from the level of hurt and pain you felt", he explained gently.
"I don't know what I did right in my past life to be given such a blessing as you for my mate", I said honestly. The smile that broke out on his face lightened my heart and comforted me in ways I never thought possible and that was just his smile.
Before he could reply me though, I heard my phone ring from the bedside table behind and he moved to get it for me. I accepted it gratefully and answered the call, the very one that set chaos in motion.