Yu Yan, couldn't help but feel resentful toward Han Zhuoli.
Yu Yan didn't feel that there was anything wrong with marrying a man who already had a family.
She couldn't take off her eyes from Han Ying when she saw him for the first time.
She fell in love at first sight with Han Ying. After she realized that he was already married, she couldn't give up such a competent man.
Her family was very reluctant to marry her to Han Ying. Even though the Han family was very powerful but Han Ying refused to use his family help and he was already married. They were afraid of ruining their family reputation. They finally accepted to marry her off to the Han family after her repeated plea.
Yu Yan knew that her marriage wasn't in her hand, she would have an arranged marriage that would be only beneficial to her family. She thought then that it would be much better to marry Han Ying as his family was already powerful enough for the Yu family to refuse and he was her first love.
She used her family status and forced him to marry her when he was at his weakest.
She didn't think there was anything wrong with getting a man of her fancy with coercion and force.
She thought that after being married, Han Ying would soften his attitude toward her but how could she know that she would only be ignored.
All the nights she waited for him to show himself was spent by herself miserably. She didn't know what had gone wrong and she had to live like a widow even though she was married already.
It wasn't that she wanted to be married as a second wife, she also wanted to marry a man who would love her and share his life with her.
She couldn't let go of Han Ying not because he was her first love just because he was too competent.
The education that was instilled in her from childhood couldn't let her let go of him. She was greedy.
Looking at the weak and almost dead first wife who was placed at the cusp of his heart, she couldn't help but feel jealous.
After Hui Yin gave birth to a son, she was filled with hatred but she was joyful that at least his first wife couldn't hold on to her life and passed away.
She was hopeful that she would get Han Ying affection now that his first wife was dead but her hopes were destroyed when she realized that he had no intention to pay any attention to her.
She married the man she wanted but it was a marriage only in name. She felt that her life that taken a turn that was worse than death and she could only blame herself for that.
She finally realized that it was her mistake and it ruined her life.
She didn't want to live a lonely life anymore.
She was not reconciled, at last, she decided to make a move that disgusted him.
She drugged Han Ying and she didn't find it shameful. She was eager to get his touch and affection.
All the love she felt in the night was an illusion that was washed away after the daybreak. She could only rely on schemes and nasty tricks to get his attention.
Yu Yan felt very happy when she gave birth to her first child, it was her hope.
Her only hope was destroyed when she was aware that the father of her child refused to let the child take his surname. She was completely devastated.
She was unhappy and depressed. She refused to give up. She couldn't take back what she had done already so she clenched her teeth and tricked the vigilant Han Ying once again when he least expected it.
When she gave birth to her two sons she finally stabilized her status and position in the Han family but she couldn't get his approval. The Han family was disgusted with her but they reluctantly acknowledged her after all she had given birth to two children who had their family blood running in their veins.
She couldn't provide love and affection to her children. She even blamed them for her estranged relationship with their father.
She hoped that Han Zhuoli would also go along with his mother and spare her from headaches but that child given birth from a very weak woman was very strong, he could always escape from her tricks.
She only tried small tricks at first which would only make the wild child look stupid and created countless difficulties for him. She grew more and more confident when she noticed that Han Ying who was already aware of her small tricks didn't even give a glance to the wounded and miserable Han Zhuoli.
She was thrilled knowing that he ignored his beloved woman child, she wasn't the only one and her children weren't the only one who was ignored.
She resorted to extreme means as time passed by. It grew to that extent that she began to hire assassins and give a bounty to her stepson.
Suddenly, she realized that Han Ying was starting to act weird toward Han Zhuoli.
she could only stare at them resentfully as the man who ignored her for her whole life tried every means to attract Han Zhuoli attention. She was shocked and unbelievable.
She tried to remain low key and reduced her attacks on her incompetent stepson. She was relieved when she saw that Han Ying still didn't have any intention to stop her.
She grew bold and started her continuous attacks once again but Han Zhuoli unexpectedly went abroad. She tried as much as she could to attack him abroad hoping for him to die abroad all alone.
Unfortunately, Han Zhuoli returned to the country more famed and successful.
Yu Yan was very jealous.
Hui Yin had all the attention that she desperately craved when she finally passed away, all his attention was focused on his passed away wife's son. She even hated her son who managed to get close to the father and son and get his attention.
All she wanted was attention and his love and care.
She has been living like a widow for more than 20 years.
It had already been 20 years since Hui Yin died but she still couldn't make a place at his heart.
She was lonely...
She often thought about her choices and fell into daze
Has she been wrong all this time?