Chapter 25: So Far
Grimmauld Place, April 11th 1997
I roll my eyes inwardly at the sight that awaits me in the kitchen on Friday morning. Nymphadora's there, sitting nonchalantly at my kitchen table, rifling through the morning paper. Not that I wasn't expecting her to visit at some point after the previous Order meeting, where she had bestowed a mix of dubious looks upon me during the gathering.
Even without her evidently knowing about Potter spending the night at Grimmauld, I assumed she would be returning to seek information about Lupin. The werewolf had been in the meeting, but had left the moment it had ended, presumably to dodge my cousin's inquiries.
I haven't actually discussed their relations with either of them, as it is none of my concern, but it is evident that something between them still lies unresolved.
Seeing her now, looking rather…worse for wear, makes me wonder if she has been as miserable and lonely as I have for the most part after my brother was taken from me. It makes me wonder if Lupin too is feeling what she has to be going through. Her hair is nothing like the bright customary shade of bubble-gum-pink she'd had when we met the first time in this decade. And while she had been looking rather drawn in January, she's now thinner and less colourful than ever.
"Good morning, cousin," I say with an expressionless voice, before flicking my wand at the kitchen cupboards, summoning a cup of coffee and some toast.
Nymphadora places the paper down and gives me a hesitant look as I sit down opposite to her and watch her stonily. She lets out a defeated sigh and frowns at the table. "I'm an arse," she says with a quiet voice, and then gives me an apologetic look.
I lift a brow at her and stay silent. I might as well use the rare moment to see her squirming.
A muffled groan escapes from her lips. "I'm sorry. What I said before. About…about Harry. I was out of line," She continues, looking at me intently while her voice remains careful.
I give her a mildly conceding look.
"And there's obviously things that I…that I don't know. Between you two…And…" She says, looking extremely uncomfortable as my expression remains blank.
" – and I mean, how long are you going to make me grovel here?" She asks impatiently, her eyes narrowing at me as the smallest twitch curves my lips.
I don't suppress the amusement from my expression. "You did offer me a vantage point here," I say pointedly, and sip my coffee as a smirk lifts my mouth.
Nymphadora rolls her eyes, but seems relieved. "I'm grateful to provide the entertainment," She says dryly. "But really, I – " She continues with a softer voice.
"All is forgiven," I merely say, interrupting her, and nod at the paper. "Anything new in there?"
She blinks at me and then shakes her head slightly, "No, not really. It's been so quiet that it makes me restless," She says, picking, seemingly unconsciously, at the sleeve of her robe.
I nod grimly at her. "I know what you mean."
There's a short silence. "Shouldn't you be at your post, guarding the school?" I ask casually, between bites of toast. Even if it is doubtful that the Dark Lord would attack the school in broad daylight, I know it is understaffed due to the Easter holidays.
Nymphadora waves a hand in dismissal. "A day off," she says, and then her eyes glint with mischief, "Don't worry…everyone, including your…better half, is exceptionally intact," She says airily.
I give her a long, deadpan look. "You had to go there, hm?"
Nymphadora smirks at me. "It was only fair," She says with a half shrug, her voice light. "I mean, what old Phineas had to say about you two, well…" She continues knowingly, her sly grin widening.
Fuck. I fucking knew I've become careless around Potter. Naturally my ancestor hasn't missed a thing and probably has been waiting to see me after the incident in the Headmaster's office, undoubtedly consumed by excitement.
My cousin evidently sees my discomfort, as she starts to cackle.
"Remind me to move him to the attic," I grumble, even as I feel my skin warming up a notch. Fucking Potter, messing with my head like that.
Nymphadora snorts. "You'll do no such thing," She says, knowing already that I will not.
Unfortunately, the portrait of my ancestor is too valuable to be moved out of sight, as it is the only connection this house has to the school and its Headmaster.
I give her a wry look. "Did you have something else you wanted to talk about, or did you really come by just to bother me?"
The small amount of colour that had returned to her features, fades slowly away. She lets out a weary sigh. "Yeah, well…I think you know," she says, her voice quiet and softer.
I watch her closely as she looks away, her lips pursing into a rigid line. After a short moment she gives me a strained look. "Have you talked with him? Remus?" She asks stiffly, her eyes moving over my face.
"I might have." I merely say, and at her frustrated expression, I continue, "He came by a couple of weeks ago."
"And?" She asks impatiently. "We all know Remus's the one who heard the rumours about werewolves congregating, even if it came from Mad-Eye," She says darkly, referring to the meeting, where Moody had revealed some troublesome news regarding the northern pack and their plans.
"Your point?" I ask, feeling slightly irritated by the narrow-eyed look, and the suspicion in her eyes. "You expect him to divulge his experiences of his undercover mission in a pack of werewolves over tea and biscuits?"
Nymphadora huffs. "I can hardly imagine you to enjoy tea and biscuits…" she says under her breath.
I give her an amused look. "I have my moments."
There's a hint of a smile on her lips, before she becomes sombre. Merlin, she's got it bad for him.
"He seemed to be unscathed," I say as I take the paper and flip over the pages. "Evidently not the best months of his life, but then, there are only so many who could do what he does," I mutter, and glance at my cousin.
She stares back with worry and fear in her eyes.
Nymphadora stays until lunch, and she uses the morning to explain about the dull patrols in the Hogsmeade village, and the occasional run ins she's had with Harry and his friends. She gets exceptionally annoying as she starts to wonder loudly what will Mrs. Weasley say when she hears that Harry and her youngest child, Ginevra, will not become a thing as Potter is now swept off his feet by a Prince Charming – her words, not mine.
I sigh with relief when I'm finally left alone. The rest of the day passes by in the library, where I go through my notes regarding the Horcrux research and what I've added after last week's meeting with Dumbledore and Potter.
I have a mission to prepare to.
Woods outside Hogwarts borders, April 19th 1997
"…The lightning struck tower…Calamity. Disaster. Coming nearer all the time…"
Yeah, well, Trelawney might have been right about something…
Firstly, Malfoy celebrating – whooping in the Room of Requirement – did not really help me to focus on our mission but then, then, Trelawney had babbled about her interview with Dumbledore, when she'd applied for the job many years ago, and it turns out that the Death Eater that had interrupted them, that had leaked the information about the prophecy to Voldemort – it had been Snape! Snape all along!
"Care to enlighten me about the twist in your trousers?" Regulus asks with a tight but quiet voice as we stand in a small clearing near the edge of the forest, outside school borders.
I knew one of them would soon question my mood, as I haven't really spoken after we met at the Headmaster's office, before Dumbledore apparated us here, near the edge of the Forbidden forest – the other edge, that is. It seems that the Headmaster is able to apparate through the school wards as he pleases – something I'll definitely tell Hermione later on.
Dumbledore trails some feet ahead, waving his wand to create protective enchantments around the area we chose to do the deed in.
To destroy the locket.
Anger flares in my chest again, and I know, I know I need to focus. With effort, I manage to swallow some of the rage down and look blankly at the black-haired man next to me. I wonder if he knows the true depth of his friend's betrayal.
"It's nothing." I grunt back and move my gaze back to Dumbledore, who seems to be wrapping up with his spellwork.
I feel Regulus's eyes on me, the scrutinising stare, but he stays silent.
But Dumbledore doesn't. "Harry?" The Headmaster asks, walking back to us, his eyes watching me with a mix of worry and curiosity. "Has something happened?" He asks kindly, stopping in front of me.
I grit my teeth together but can't suppress the burst of anger, "Snape happened!" I hiss and glare at them both. "He's the one who told Voldemort about the prophecy. He was the one who made him mark me as a target!"
Regulus's expression doesn't change while Dumbledore frowns slightly. "When did you learn this?" The Headmaster asks calmly, his eyes flickering to Regulus before returning back to me.
I let out a frustrated sound. "Trelawney told me. And you…you knew all this time – but said nothing to me!"
The rage bubbles inside me again, and this time I'm unable to control it.
"WHY WOULD YOU LET HIM TEACH AFTER THAT? AFTER HE TOLD VOLDEMORT TO GO AFTER MY MUM AND DAD!?" I yell at Dumbledore, nearly panting as I try to control my anger.
Why, why would Dumbledore trust him? Why would he trust Snape after all that?
Dumbledore takes in a deep breath, even though he seems to be quite calm already. "He made a terrible mistake," He says softly.
I scoff loudly.
"Please listen to what I have to say, Harry," Dumbledore continues, his expression serious. "Professor Snape was still a Death Eater at the time when he heard about the prophecy. Only after he learned what would his master do, of whom he was about to kill – "
I let out an irritated growl. "Snape never cared about any of us, not my father, not my mother, and certainly not me! You expect me to believe – "
"Even in darkness, feelings of remorse are hard to dismiss," Dumbledore says wearily, interrupting me. "And I believe this is in fact the greatest regret of Professor Snape's life. It was the reason he wanted to return. To turn his back to his master."
I want to shake him, to make some sense to him. Doesn't he know how good Snape is to deceive people? I give Regulus an incredulous look. He stays as expressionless as ever, although he seems to be listening to our words intently.
"You know him. Snape. Would you believe him in this?" I ask sharply, and Regulus gives me a long, calculating look.
"Harry, enough. I trust Severus completely." Dumbledore says quietly before Regulus can even open his mouth.
I take in a steadying breath, suppressing the scream of anger and frustration that threatens to burst out. "I don't. I know he's up to something. That Malfoy's up to something. And I just ran into Trelawney, who was kicked out from the Room of Requirement by him – by Malfoy! And she told me he was celebrating something!" I say heatedly.
"What do you think they are up to?" Regulus asks calmly, seeming a bit curious.
Dumbledore lifts a hand to interrupt me from answering. "We have discussed this, Harry. There is nothing suspicious happening in the school. I promise you, while we are here, the school remains protected," he says sternly, his blue eyes flashing momentarily with something. "Now. I would like for us to focus on our mission. We are here to destroy a Horcrux."
I stay silent for a moment and stare at the ground between our feet. I know it is pointless to argue with him about this. But at the same time, I know there is something going on, that Malfoy and Snape are both up to something. Something bad. And now they both probably know that the Headmaster is away from the school, and who knows how long will it take to destroy one ugly heirloom.
Because of that, I made some precautions. Before we left, when Dumbledore asked me to get my Invisibility cloak from my dorm, I met Ron and Hermione, and hastily explained them everything. I told them to take the Felix, just in case, as I have a strong feeling of suspicion regarding Malfoy's schemes. Hermione of course was sceptical – she thinks he's just a bully, a narrow-minded kid. But he's not. I just know it. Malfoy has changed. He's not the bullying, prejudiced child anymore. He's a Death Eater. I know he's capable of more. But I hope it doesn't come to it.
"Do you remember what we agreed, Harry?" Dumbledore asks after a short moment. "The conditions I had for you attending this mission?"
How could I forget. I'm to do nothing, and merely stand next to the Headmaster as he does all the work. "Yes. I'm to stay behind and observe, and obey your every command, without hesitance," I grumble and move my eyes to meet his with a defiant look.
Dumbledore gives me an approving nod, and then a small smile. "Brilliant. We can start then." He says, placing the locket on top of a large tree stump and taking a step back to pick up the sword from the ground. "Your turn, Harry."
It was agreed that even though they would need me to open the locket, Dumbledore would be one to finish the object, as we learned that there might be some difficulties for Regulus to use the sword against the Horcrux. After disposing the locket, we agreed that Dumbledore would apparate us back to the castle.
In my head, it sounds simple, at least.
I focus on the locket, concentrate on the letter S gleaming on its front. I imagine it as a serpent, ignore the way the object starts to move threateningly, as if something terrible is waiting to get out.
As soon as the quiet hiss, a snarl, really, leaves my mouth, I know it is nowhere near simple.
The golden locket opens and immediately we are blinded by a dazzling light. And right after, a loud blast follows, taking us all by surprise. My scream is muffled as I'm thrown away several feet from where I was, landing hard on my back. Luckily there's grass to soften the hit. Still, my head is swinging as I blink and take in my surroundings.
It seems that Regulus had been hit by the blast as well, as he is slowly gathering himself and moving to stand up. But Dumbledore is still there, standing in front of the tree stump, the Gryffindor sword in the other hand, and the other in the air, pushing the…magic…away from us, towards the locket.
"Come on," Regulus says gruffly and pulls me back up to standing before he takes a hold of his wand and walks quickly towards Dumbledore.
Then, a cold voice fills the air, stopping us in our tracks, making the hairs in my neck to stand up.
"…Albus Dumbledore…"
"…We meet again. Come to fight me? Finally stopped hiding behind stronger men…and yet…you are still weaker than a mere part of me…"
"Don't listen to it!" I yell, while Dumbledore has stilled, frozen before the tree stump, his hand still outstretched, fighting against the dark magic that is oozing from the locket.
"I see you now…I know what you have done. I know your regrets…It makes you weak. It makes you…vulnerable…"'
Dumbledore's hand starts to tremble, and I wonder if he has the strength to hold the Horcrux back. "Stab it!" I yell, and make a move towards the Headmaster, only to be pushed back by another pulse of dark magic.
This time I keep my balance, but…I can't move. "Regulus!" I shout, starting to feel alarmed, starting to feel afraid.
Regulus grits his teeth and tries to force himself to move, unsuccessfully.
"Stab it!" I yell again, panic edged into my voice. Alarm gripping my insides.
But it seems that Dumbledore doesn't even hear me. It seems that he's in some sort of trance and using all his willpower to deflect the dark magic.
Dark smoke starts to seep upwards from the locket, while Voldemort's high-pitched laugh echoes in the dark clearing. The smoke clears enough that I can see three figures taking forms, floating in the air, over the locket.
Two young men, and a girl.
Dumbledore flinches when the girl starts to speak to him with a soft voice.
"I tried to stop you, brother…I tried to help…"
Dumbledore lets out a small gasp, his grip on the sword slowly faltering, until the Gryffindor heirloom drops to the grass with a soft thump.
I stare at them in shock, until I realise that the girl had called Dumbledore her brother…Dumbledore has a sister?
"…I tried to make it better…Why…? Why did you do it…? Why did you hurt me…?"
"Don't listen to it!" Regulus bellows suddenly, still straining to move. "Finish it! Destroy it!"
One of the figures, one of the young men, turns to Dumbledore.
"…It was you, brother. You are the reason she is dead. You are the one who brought this upon us…You! You gave her away…for greater good…"
The last words are spoken with such malice, that the Headmaster seems to visibly shrink from the weight of them.
"I'm sorry," Dumbledore breathes, his body shivering. "I never meant it to happen, never!"
The girl watches Dumbledore sadly, while one of the men – the one calling Dumbledore his brother – snarls at him.
"…We would've been better without you! Without him!"
Dumbledore's head falls slightly. After a short silence, he nods. "I know," he says, resignedly. "I wish – I wish it had been me instead…"
My head reels as I try to understand the situation. What are they speaking about? Are those people Dumbledore's siblings? And I know, it shouldn't even matter. Not now. Nothing matters more than getting rid of that poisonous thing.
"Dumbledore! Do it!" I shout, almost desperately, and then…then many things happen at once.
Regulus growls next to me, his face distorted with pain, and even though I've moved my attention momentarily towards him, trying to gauge the situation, to see if he's okay, from the corner of my eye I see sudden movement.
The figures surge upwards, and a second later, a strong pulse of dark magic explodes, not towards Dumbledore, but towards us. Regulus and me.
And the next moment, Dumbledore has turned towards us, wandlessly summoning the explosion away from us, and for a small moment, a second really, I think we are going to survive, but then, Dumbledore has his back on the locket, and doesn't have time to deflect the blast that hits him, sending him flying several feet across the clearing.
I yell in shock, and only as I run towards the Headmaster, I notice that the spell that kept Regulus and I in place, is broken.
"NO! No, no, no…Dumbledore…sir…" I pant as I reach him, collapsing onto my knees beside him, dread and nausea mingling in my stomach.
Dumbledore lies on his side on the soft ground, his eyes closed. He looks uninjured, as if he's merely sleeping, but I need to know that he's going to be all right. I need him to be okay.
"Potter, not yet!" Regulus shouts, sounding angry all of a sudden. "We need to destroy it!"
But I don't care. I need to see that Dumbledore is breathing first. "Sir…" I say shakily, placing my trembling hand against his shoulder.
Dumbledore stirs and a long, relieved breath leaves my lungs.
"He's okay! He's – " I say urgently, and my voice is stuck in my throat as I see Regulus at the tree stump.
No…
The sword in his hand, his expression focused, looking almost enraged as he lifts the sword up, preparing to strike.
"Regulus, no!" I yell in panic, but he doesn't listen.
He doesn't stop either. As soon as the blade touches the locket with a clang of metal, a loud, painful scream is ripped from his throat.
I barely catch the high-pitched, drawn-out cry – the Horcrux – as it is mostly covered by Regulus's agony.
"NO!" I roar, and scramble to my feet, running towards him, gasping in shock, horrified by the way Regulus shudders violently, shrieking in pain for several moments until no more sounds erupt from his mouth, and his body lurches towards the ground where it stays, unmoving.
I curse inwardly as I reach him, the nauseating helplessness filling me again as the people around me keep hurting, keep taking strikes for me. I only give the briefest of looks towards the Horcrux, at the shattered remains of the locket on the tree stump, making sure it is indeed destroyed, before I move my focus back to him.
"Regulus?" I whisper, feeling breathless, my voice thick as my eyes move quickly over his body, searching for wounds. "Please be okay, please be okay," I mumble, my voice wavering.
Regulus lies on the grass on his back, eyes closed, the sword still held loosely on his right hand, but his left…the fabric of his cloak in his left arm has burnt away almost completely, revealing a large distorted, sizzling burn injury.
The Mark.
It's bad. The wounds are deep. I struggle to swallow down the bile that threatens to rise in my throat. The skin on his forearm is charred, and there's a several inches long area of white, waxy looking skin, speckled with red dots. But he's breathing. It's a raspy sound, but it is still there.
Thank fucking merlin.
"Shit…Don't you dare dying on me," I grit through my teeth and quickly glance back to Dumbledore.
I need him to help Regulus. Luckily the Headmaster is gaining consciousness, and then he's moving quickly towards us.
"Harry…" He sounds stricken as his eyes find Regulus and he sees the state he is in. "I'm – "
"Help him," I interrupt the Headmaster, my voice pleading but sharp.
Dumbledore nods, his expression clearing into a blank one. He kneels on Regulus's other side, on his left side, and waves his wand slowly over the injured arm. He repeats the spell several times.
The moment stretches on, and I'm holding my breath, ignoring the way my pulse is pounding in my ears, and how my head is thrumming steadily. He has to be okay. He – what if the curse, or whatever the hell dark magic the mark has, what if it is something that can't be healed? What if he won't wake up?
I swallow hard, not letting myself think about the possibility, not letting myself tear up. Not yet.
My eyes move over Regulus's face, and I unconsciously lift my hand to slowly push away a stray lock of hair from his forehead. I need him. I need him to be okay.
I watch, feeling utterly helpless again, as Dumbledore uses magic to lift Regulus's injured arm up a couple of inches from the ground and conjures wordlessly a large moist bandage before wrapping it gently over his wounds.
"W-Will he be okay?" I ask faintly, worry evident in my voice, and only now notice how my hand still hovers over the side of Regulus's face, cradling his cheek. Even though he's unconscious, there're still deep lines of anguish visible in his expression.
Dumbledore gives me a weary glance, not looking at all like the all-powerful and great wizard I'm accustomed to. "The curse was not fatal, but it may be disastrous if not healed. This will help keep him steady. We need to get him to the infirmary," he says, sounding exhausted.
His words help the dread and nausea inside me dissipate only slightly. But that's the best he can do, and the sooner we return to the school, the sooner Madam Pomfrey can start making sure that Regulus will heal. That he will be well.
I chew the inside of my cheek as I watch the Headmaster more closely, trying to figure out how much the struggle with the Horcrux affected him. How much it has weakened him.
"Will you be okay, sir? What it said…what he said…" I ask hesitantly, my eyes following Dumbledore's movements as he slowly pushes up to stand on his feet.
A small smile lifts up the corners of his mouth. "You don't have to worry about me, Harry," he says, and glances at the sky, his mouth opening as if he's about to say something else.
But instead, shock fills his expression, his body recoiling.
"Sir…?" I ask, confused by the sudden change in his demeanour, and move to look at the same direction, only to mimic his expression.
Below the starry night, far across the forest, on the other side, a dark mass looms, high in the air.
The Dark Mark.