Chapter 5: Mothers
You'd think a guy as fashion conscious as Rumple, would paint his house a color that wasn't the same shade as Pepto-Bismol.
Of course, it wasn't like he'd pick the pink. Regina had done that originally when she sent him to Storybrooke. It was sort of a joke.
Well, it was funny back then. Not so much now. He had time to repaint it, yet he kept it the same ostentatious vomit worthy pink.
Honestly, it felt a little odd being here. This was the last place that Regina felt invited at, but she felt a need to be there. Harry needed moral support.
It had to feel weird moving in with Rumpelstiltskin.
Though, Harry didn't know Rumple as Rumple. He knew a lot of details of their past, but neither Regina nor Gold had revealed that they were all fairytale characters.
Let alone villains.
All he knew was that they were from another realm and that Rumple was some sorcerer. Regina didn't even try to tell him about the whole evil queen thing. Though she knew they'd have to, eventually.
The Charmings were already trying to get their annoying noses involved. And once Henry found out about his uncle, well, the cat would be out of the bag.
Which was one of the reasons why Regina was at the Gold house. The other was, well, she wanted to be there for the small welcome home party that Gold was throwing Harry. Though it really wasn't that much of a party since only Regina, Belle, and Gold were there.
She was confused with this apparently new branch to her family. The fact that her mother and Gold had done the deed was really disturbing.
Regina wished she knew where her mother was.
After one big monologue about wanting to get closer to Regina—well, that was it. Bye-bye, Cora.
Knowing her mother, she was probably busy somewhere shagging Hook.
Ew!
However, at this point Regina really wouldn't be surprised. Her mother had gotten involved with Gold. And god knows, Hook was better looking than Gold. Though he really didn't seem like the cougar type. Not that Regina had had that much of a conversation with the man.
Or for that matter cared to.
Cora must have a thing for leather, Regina decided before trying to think of more pleasant things, like her brother.
Odd as it might sound, she was really glad that Harry was related her.
It felt nice having someone like her again, even though maybe saying like was a stretch since she was basically a complete stranger to her brother.
Sure, they had a few talks in the hospital. Enough where Regina knew she wanted to murder Harry's so called family to the point that she even confided in Gold about the Dursleys' misdeeds, but it wasn't like she knew him like Henry.
"Bee in your bonnet, Regina?" Gold said from behind her.
"Aren't you supposed to be in the house?"
Gold looked at her, "We just got here. You didn't wait for him to even have a tour of the place, did you?"
"Well, I am his sister." Regina said.
"Don't remind me," Gold said. "You could at least help Belle. She's helping him get out of the car."
"Oh, I'm sure Harry likes that." Regina said.
She had seen the way her little brother had blushed around Gold's girlfriend and it was so disturbing on so many levels. Seriously, that bookworm. Her brother really should have much more refined taste. Then again, she guess she couldn't say much about Belle now since she was probably going to have to associate with Gold on a fairly regular basis.
"Regina!" Harry had spotted her.
She just had to smile. He seemed so happy to see her. She didn't know why it made her that happy. For twenty-eight years there had been several people happy to see her. Most notably Graham. Of course, he wasn't that happy when she ripped his heart into little bitty bits. But that was just details.
"I brought pie." She said.
"Of course you did," Gold said as he unlocked the door to the surprisingly immaculate—if cluttered—looking house. "Harry, we'll be forgoing the pie."
Harry frowned as Belle pushed him towards the entryway. While Gold might've healed a lot of majority injuries, his leg was still broken due to all the damage that was sustained. "But it's pie."
"It's Regina's pie." Gold said.
Belle's face dropped as she heard him say this.
"Oh, it's not like any one is going to fall dead." Regina said. "I'll even have a piece."
Gold rolled his eyes. "Belle bought a cake."
She bought a cake. Like that was the same as homemade apple pie. Regina really was proud of her pies. She had twenty-eight years to perfect them. Belle had twenty-eight minutes to pick up what was probably a gooey mess.
"It's homemade," Regina said.
Gold rolled his eyes.
"I'm sure it's great." Harry said.
"We have cake." Gold said.
Regina rolled her eyes. "You and the Book Barbie can have your cake then. If Harry wants pie, Harry's getting pie."
"Not if it's your pie." Rumple said.
"That was years ago." Regina countered.
"Less than a year ago."
"It was a turnover not a pie."
It was at this point Regina noticed how bewildered Harry looked.
"What are you two talking about?"
Regina sighed, "Food poisoning."
"Oh, it was more than a little food poisoning." Gold said.
"Do we really want to go there?" Regina said knowing that if she told Harry everything that was in Rumple's very dirty closet the boy would probably have a coronary.
Then again, she didn't exactly want to emotionally scar her brother. He seemed to have already had enough of that (scarring that is). Based on the Dursleys.
Dear lord, she wanted to kill them. She was surprised Gold hadn't yet. When she asked him earlier, all he would say is that they had been dealt with.
Cryptic bastard.
Harry looked at them, "What?"
"It's nothing," the Bookworm said. "You want a piece of cake, sweetie. It's supposed to be really good. It's Granny's special Black Forest."
Regina rolled her eyes. Of course, they bought food from that painted up old biddy. How typical.
"I'll have pie." Harry replied. "Though I'll have cake later, if that's okay."
Gold shrugged. "It's fine. But I think you'd prefer the cake."
"The pie." Harry said looking at Regina for some sort of something.
What? Regina didn't know what but she couldn't help but grin as she felt an odd fuzzy feeling that she only felt before with her son.
Her son, who was currently with Emma and the Charmings doing who knows what. Regina didn't even want to think about that. She wanted pie.
Which wasn't poisoned—thank you very much. She had made it as a kind gesture. And Harry seemed to appreciate it a lot.
"It's good, Regina." He said while Gold and Belle kept staring at him. Seriously, they still thought he was going to die even though Regina was eating a piece.
"The cake's better." Rumple countered.
Regina rolled her eyes. "You can't beat my pie."
"It is really good." Harry said. "It was nice of you to bring it."
Too polite for the spawn of Cora and Rumple, Regina thought, as she watched her brother. He was way too thin. Smaller than Henry. And they were, what the same age? Of course, Rumple was a smaller man than that idiot Charming, but it wasn't like he was that small. And Cora was a tall woman.
This made Regina hate the Dursleys more and made her resolved to see Harry eat another piece of pie before she left.
"Just wanted your homecoming to be special," Regina said. "I figured you needed some sugar after being in the hospital for so long."
Harry shrugged. "I haven't had sugar really since Hogwarts."
Regina nodded. She should've expected as much. She still had to get use to this concept of Hogwarts. Not even the all knowing Dark One knew about the land with no magic's alleged magic school.
Honestly, she didn't know how to respond to that. So instead she asked her brother how his leg was.
"It's not that bad." Harry said.
Regina saw Gold roll his eyes. Obviously, it was bad. Especially since Gold hadn't used magic to heal it yet.
"It really isn't hurting as much." Harry said to Gold.
"And yet Whale prescribed you six different prescriptions." Gold said, "Not to mention the various potions that I'll be forcing down your throat."
Harry's nose wrinkled at potions.
"They won't be that bad." Gold said.
"I took potion class all last year and none of them tasted good."
"Obviously, they weren't made by me, dearie." Gold said.
Regina noted that even Bookworm Barbie rolled her eyes at that little remark.
"I'm sure they're not as good as Regina's pie." Harry said.
Gold rolled his eyes and muttered something about not dying from his potions. Which wasn't exactly true given that Regina was pretty sure he had killed a couple of people via potion. But once again, not wanting to scar someone for life.
"You should taste it." Harry said.
"What?" Gold said.
"Taste the pie." Harry said, "Both you and Belle. It would be the polite thing to do. And it's really good."
Gold glared at him. "I'm not tasting that pie. And Belle is definitely not tasting that pie."
"Belle can make her own choices." Harry countered.
Belle smirked, "Yes, I can. But Harry, I agree with Rum…your father. I don't want to taste the pie. Apples and I aren't just a good mix."
Probably because Regina had forced a sleeping potion flavored like apple cider down the brunette's throat for a number of years to shut her up from calling the imp's name.
Harry turned to his father, "What's your reason?"
"Too much of a risk." Rumple said.
"Sometimes you have to make a risks." Harry said, "That's how my friends and I found…"
Found the Philosopher's Stone. Oh, Regina heard that one. And she was not amused, neither was Rumple she was sure. There was no way in hell her brother was going back to that school full of liabilities.
"Yes," Rumple said. "Risks are all in good if you make an assessment first. And after making an assessment, there's no good reason for me to take a bite out that pie."
"I'll be happy." Harry said.
"Well, that is a pretty good reason." Rumple said. "But I'm sure you'll be happy if you had some of that cake. Or when you see what Belle and I did to your room."
"You and Belle decorated his room?" Regina asked.
Rumple shrugged. "I did pick up something from that HGTV and Belle has excellent taste."
"He exaggerates." Belle said.
Harry looked at them, "Please, taste the pie."
Rumple sighed, "Is it really worth a stomach ache."
"You won't get sick."
"What about if I die?"
"Rumple…" Belle warned.
"Fine," He said looking first at Belle than at Harry. "But if I taste a bite of this pie, there's going to be some sort of price to it."
"Don't be serious." Regina rolled her eyes.
"There always has to be a bargain for exchange." Rumple countered.
Harry looked at him, "Tell you what, if you taste the pie, I won't complain about the potions."
Rumple nodded before grabbing a fork and much to her surprise taking a bite out of Regina's pie.
On her way home that evening, Regina couldn't help but feel relaxed for the first time in a very long time. For once she wasn't obsessing over Henry, though she still thought about her child and wanted to call him. But the pain wasn't unbearable that night. She was thinking about Harry.
"Well, you seem to have found a spring in your step."
The voice caught her off guard.
"Mother."
It looked like Cora had adapted to Storybrooke quite well. Gone was the Queen of Hearts wardrobe and elaborate hairdo, in its place was a simple but expensive looking pair of slacks and blouse and sleek looking blow out. Though she was wearing a red overcoat. So, her signature color was still there.
"Regina," Cora said. "An interesting part of town you're in."
Was it really?
Rumple didn't live that far away from Regina. They lived on the rich end of Storybrooke. Though Regina did suppose she put their houses as far away as possible.
"I'm taking a walk." Regina said.
"In heels?"
"You burn more calories that way. Where's your pirate?"
"Hook's busy." Cora said. "Planning revenge, the usual. I'm sure he'll turn up though. He's dependable that way. You should really think of getting a man like that."
Regina darkened. She had a man. Until her mother decided to rip his heart out. Not wanting to dwell on the past, for now, Regina sighed. "Nice clothes. Glad to see you thought that was more important than catching up with me."
"Well, I didn't want to look conspicuous. And you did try to kill me, darling."
"That was years ago." Regina countered.
Cora shrugged. "Forgive me from wanting to be a little distant."
"You said you wanted to repair our relationship the other night."
"It takes time." Cora said before changing the subject, "Isn't this where the Dark One lives? Obnoxious color, isn't it?"
Regina shrugged. "I thought it was fitting."
"Really, Regina." Cora said. "Were you visiting Rumple?"
"Oh, yes," Regina said. "Because I just love visiting Rumpelstiltskin."
"He does have his uses." Her mother said.
Yeah, to have your secret baby with, Regina thought. However, she decided that she wasn't going to reveal Harry's existence to her mother.
One it would scar him for life. Two she didn't want to die via Rumple. And three, she didn't want anyone else to have the displeasure of having Cora as their mother. So, she decided for the sadistic root. "Yes, Rumple does have his uses. He can be quite…sensual."
Oh, yeah, based on the way Cora looked that seemed to do the trick. "Oh, Regina. No. Please no. Besides, isn't he with that pathetic mousy creature that you locked up in the asylum."
"A technicality." Regina said. "And I had her locked in an asylum for good reason."
Cora shook her head as if she was trying to convince herself that Regina and Rumple were not a thing.
The image made Regina sick, but she was getting joy out of it so she continued. "Besides, it's not like we want relationship like that. So, plebian."
"Regina, I am your mother. He is old enough to be your…your..."
"Cat caught your tongue, Mother." Regina said using that old idiom.
"Hardly," Cora said. "It's just gross, Regina."
"Because you slept with him." Regina said.
She didn't even wait for Cora to answer her before she disappeared into thin air. Leaving Cora to ponder just how Regina knew one of her most embarrassing mistakes.