Chapter 4 - 4

That was the first kiss I've ever had. I don't know what it was like. His hands went under my skirt encircling my pantie and kissing me harder and pushing his legs back n front with my one leg between his two. I could feel the warmth in between and automatically my body started responding. Then he stopped, What the fuck, why would you stop, I blurted out. "You really are a slut, man, I wish I could fuck you hard there, but look that way". A guy waved from the door and then he was gone. I looked down at myself; shirt and skirt crinkled.

I never wanted myself to be this pathetic. Only question I had in my mind was,'why mom enjoyed it and why I didn't?' I went home, cleaned up myself so that I won't feel this dirty. Unlike other days, today I didn't fought at the table for those beggars having same food as I was having. Mom called me up and I was already crying. She was looking radiant under the moonlight in the balcony, wearing nothing but a silk white night gown. I walked up to her by making noise from my footsteps so I don't have to be the first one to speak. As expected, she turned back, and gestured me to stand next to her. "You are for sure my one and only biological child. I brought you from god. I asked you from him and you are the most precious gift I ever could get." She continued, with a death infront of you face. " You know what, we are similar in every context, you have rebellious nature, at some point of life I was just like you; I also didn't wanted this life for me. It was like, this life was emposed on me by my masters. Unlike you, I never had chance to study, have a support system or most important of all, to say NO. But still, I'd courage to speak for myself and get what I wanted; no worry if that thing was SEX." Shockingly I turned my face towards her. All she was doing was to; smile. "In a buisness like this, there's a lot of competition and no friends. One has to stand as one man army, I'm having competitive nature within me, unknowingly. I'm not going to tell you everything but, always remember; what you were and what you have become. Cause, the outsiders will try to remove the your true self; unknowingly." I didn't knew she could speak this much with her fragile framework. She turned towards me and wiped the tears from my face. "My story, I didn't wanted mine to be tearful; but an inspiring one for many out there". She smiled. " especially for you. I never wanted you to feel, fear or cry the same I had. Till now, I thought, I'm there to protect you but now..."

What's the hell is she blurting out,is she sending me far away somewhere or is she returning me to my real parents just because I misbehaved. That couldn't be the reason cause she said, I'm her one and only daughter.

"I'm having a breast as well as cervical cancer and that to thr last stage". Why? what? I just...." I won't be with you to protect you as I promised. Promise me, you will not do what I did, you will not choose the filthy road, that would force people to look down on you." I hugged her, I don't want to let go of her, I won't have anyone beside me, she will die.....I began breathing heavily.....

"Promise me, that you would.. repeat after me."

I, promise that I will never stop fighting for the rest of my life.....

I will ,

Obey less; Resist MORE.