May 4th 2013; 10:32am
It had been almost six hours since they wheeled her into the emergency room and there was still no word on her progress or if she was even alive.
Why couldn't the doctor just give me something, anything, preferably some shred of hope to hold on to?
Instead, all had been quiet.
I paced down the hallway, running my hands through my hair and glancing anxiously now and then towards the closed E.R doors. Angel was sitting on one of the plastic chairs cross-legged, her hands in her lap as she stared at the patterns on the floor, and Rain was leaning on the wall with her arms crossed with her head cast down so I couldn't see the expression on her face.
"Anything?" I rushed towards a nurse carrying a tray of some weird-looking needles and scissors and other disturbing stuff. She shook her head solemnly at me, removed her hand from my grasp, and continued briskly down the hallway.
I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to calm my racing heart before glancing over at my friends, who were staring sadly at me. Annoyed, I tore my gaze from them and plunked down in a chair, before placing my head on my knees.
"Shay, everything's going to be fine," Rain said gently, and I glanced up to see her walking towards me. She lowered herself into the chair next to me and placed her hand soothingly on my back "She'll be fine"
"How can you say that?" I looked at her exasperatedly and groaned, dropping my head back onto my knees "It's been five hours"
"Things happen, Shay," Rain said with a sigh as she resumed rubbing my back "all we have to do is deal with them"
"Why are you talking like that?" I said angrily, standing up and inching away from Rain. I glared at her and ran my hands with a frustrated grunt through my hair "she's not dead yet"
"She'll be fine Shay, I promise" Rain said again, making a move to hug me. I stepped back, stopping her with a gesture. Sighing, I walked away from her and towards the door where the doctors were currently operating on her.
"Don't make promises you can't keep" I muttered bitterly, glancing briefly at Rain. She opened her mouth to say something and then decided against it. Instead, she walked over and sat in a plastic chair next to Angel.
My mother walked in then with a frantic look on her face. I sighed sadly, feeling a lump rise in my throat as I ran to hug her. She dropped her purse on a chair and stretched her arms wide for me; as I held my mother close to me, it dawned on me that I might never see my little sister again; because as they frantically operated to save her life on the other side of that door, I realized that Lolita had been right earlier that morning.
It was my fault
Now, I couldn't take any of it back.
And I hated myself for it.