Let's talk about everyone's favorite marriage topic, sex. It's a layered topic with many subsections; desire on both parts, how often, birth control, kids, energy, pleasure, and need. I will try to give an overview on as many as I can. My husband and I have only been married a year. Everything is a journey, but we have gotten most of the kinks out about sex shortly into our marriage.
Men physically needing sex and women not is a commonly used statement to describe the dynamic between a couple. As a woman, we might not physically need sex, but we still desire pleasure. We tend to have difficulty expressing that to our husbands and sometimes feel "used" because we give them sex but fail to receive our desired pleasure. I encourage us wives to communicate and not be ashamed to need pleasure.
Sex is commonly thought of as ejection inside a vagina, which can result in a baby without the use of birth control methods. For couples who may not want many or any children and/or maybe not feel comfortable with birth control pills and condoms etc, this poses complications. It may hinder the natural want to fulfill sexual desires. I've learned that sex can be a lot more than that and there are many ways to fulfill desires without worrying about making a baby. I found one key to that is masturbating each other. Invest in a vibrator and other sex toys to your comfort. Conservative couples may feel very awkward about this, but be assured you aren't doing anything wrong (this excludes porn, which has very negative affects on both parties).
The use of toys can greatly decrease the energy needed to pleasure each other. This comes in handy when you are tired, especially if you do have children and mommy is exhausted. Although sex is not the most time consuming/top of the list aspect of marriage, it is still very important in keeping a marriage strong.