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Chapter 41 - Broken Pieces Part 1

"Esai how do you know about Taki?" Calder asked as he tried to pull himself out of Esai's embrace. "You idiot! You told me! I knew from the very beginning!" Esai shouted then he finally released Calder. "I'm so happy you're back. You are really, really back." Esai said as tears started to well up in his eyes. "What is going on." Calder asked. Landis looked a Calder then Esai. "That," Landis started but Esai glared at him instantly. Landis pursed his lips and glared at Esai.

Esai let out a heavy sigh then sank back into the sofa. He brought his hand up to his hair and brushed it all back slowly. He then looked at Calder and gave him a bittersweet smile. "After I said that I was going to the war you wanted to follow. I was so proud of you. I really wanted you to stay here but at the same time I didn't trust a certain person." Esai started.

Calder nodded his head as he stared at Esai. "But then that person tried to convince you to stay. I'm not sure what happened but long story short when we were ready to depart you were no longer the Calder I always knew. It was like you were an unfeeling, almost like a living doll. I was devastated. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't leave you behind so we brought Rutley with us and left for the war."

"During the first three years I thought I could wake you up from whatever that person did to you but it was hopeless. Rutley had been watching over you, day and night making sure you didn't kill yourself but I couldn't take it anymore. I sent Rutley back to kill those worthless bugs then you... you shut down even more. You stopped talking."

"Calder I don't know how or why but you started to even outsmart Rutley and went rogue. I don't know what possessed you to do what you did but we won the war because of you. I didn't know how to even feel when the war was over but you were still... Then that arrow came and that was the first time in five years I saw light in your eyes... It was the first time in two years that you actually said something. Then the blood, I thought I lost you all over again." Esai explained with a devastated look.

"So my memories?" Calder asked nervously. "Of your past life." Landis answered quietly. "I was reborn?" Calder asked as everything sunk in. "Yes." Esai replied. "This is insane! No I must be insane! Why would I ever...." Calder started to shout but then a very faded memory surfaced. "Hi, I'm Taki but my real name is Calder. Are you my big brother?" A sweet voice asked as a fuzzy face scowled at him. "Get away from me." He said coldly.

"I did. It was the first thing I ever said to you." Calder said in a small voice. "Yes you did." Esai answered. "And you hated me." Calder said as he looked at Esai sorrowfully. "...I did." Esai answered with a guilty look. "Why?" Calder asked but Esai stayed silent. "Esai you have to let Rutley go." Landis said nonchalantly. "No." Esai replied promptly.

"But you have too. If you want Calder to survive what's coming next, you have to let him out." Landis said. Esai clicked his tongue and averted his gaze. "Rutley? Wait what's coming next?" Calder asked. Landis glanced at Esai and then sighed. "Your memories are coming back. All your memories. Just like before you will be battling with your subconscious. We won't know if you will complete what," Landis said but Esai shot him a deadly look.

"We don't know if that person implanted a special command in your subconscious. We don''t even know why you went rogue so Rutley will have to watch you closely." Landis continued. "But Rutley has his own orders implanted into his subconscious." Esai said coldly as he narrowed his gaze at Landis. "We just need to stay away from whatever triggered it." Landis said with a small shrug.

"We don't know what the trigger words are! It's to dangerous for Calder. We are not bringing that monster out from underground." Esai growled. "What if I remember the words." Calder asked. The men looked at him. Esai's eyes were round and Landis just gave him a gentle smile. "If I don't repeat them can you let Rutley go?"

Esai couldn't hold back his utter shock. His jaw slacked as his eyes rounded. "Do you remember what you said?" Landis asked. Calder's face paled and he dropped his gaze to the floor. "B-barely. I vaguely remember what we were talking about and my mind kinda went blank. Then I saw something weird in my memories." Calder admitted.

"If you can't remember what the exact words were then it's pointless to let Rutley be by your side." Esai said coldly after her recovered from his shock. "No. It's not pointless! I, Rutley is family and he shouldn't be put in jail because of something that I caused!" Calder shouted in frustration. "Calder what was your conversation." Landis asked cautiously.

"It what was about what Esai told me... My head was feeling fuzzy and I couldn't understand the words. It was so simple but at the same time it was so foreign to me. How could I not be free? Of course I'm free but then I wondered about my behaviour and I really couldn't stand my own head anymore. So I asked Rutley about it. I know I said something weird, I know I did then..."

"Then Rutley, his face was wrong. His eyes turned dull and then I saw my memory. He was showing me the same face he showed when some weird woman touched him inappropriately." Calder explained as he started to feel sick to his stomach. "She had a really alluring voice and, and it wasn't the first time I heard it. It was soothing and chilling at the same, I hear-ahh!" Calder shouted as he grabbed his head again. "Calder" He heard her call out in his head.

"Now! She's calling me!" Calder shouted out in a panic as cold sweat rolled down his face. "Esai!" Landis shouted and Esai gave a complicated look. "Aahh!" Calder shouted again as he doubled over. "Take care of him! Don't you dare let him slip back into that woman's trance. I will go get Rutley." Esai said before he rushed out of the room.

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