Maeve
No sleep's why I am lying here on my bed for like hours. Thinking and thinking that I like him. He's attractive and if I could choose a man to have sex with, it is him. He's a package and he's a good gene. Maybe, if this marriage won't work, I could start helping myself and work hard to save money while I am spending his money. Thinking about that I could have a few amounts of money from him makes me guilty.
No. I won't take his money when we both separated. I will pay for everything. But right now, I must review take a professional exam, and other exams just for liability. I could migrate to the US since Grandma told me that she's going to bring me there since she wanted to visit their house there.
"Maeve," there's a knock on the door and it opens as my two grown sisters get in with mom. I just stare at the ceiling.
"Maeve tells us the truth. Did something happen between you and him?" My oldest sister Hannah asked.
"What something? Specifically?" I ask with a lousy exhale.
"Sex."
"No."
"Then, why didn't you tell us that you both had seen each other back then?"
"Because he doesn't like me. So, I assume that it was just me. And I just back off. He wouldn't like me because I'm not perfect. Still, he's a bastard."
"Mom, she's getting crazy."
I hate that they are there. Mother would say a lot of things and lessons that I know already. I hate hearing it because it makes me guilty, anxious and very much disappointed in myself. I just wanted myself to die. Die. Nobody understands me.
"His grandmother like me, that's what I know because she treated me well and she always scolded him sometimes just to be nice. Sorry that I disappoint you but, I'll still study hard and give you all beautiful life." I heard my phone dings and dings and dings and dings. I reach it and found his text messages. Full of it. Full of I'm sorry. Full of kisses.
I left the phone and walk to the bathroom. I fill the bathtub and pour the cherry blossom extract and the soap. I took the tablet on the side and started playing music video as I relax there and watch Demi Lovato's Tell Me You Love Me.
I watch it as the couple are fighting over something. I look at the clock I got seven hours before our wedding it is already nine and I'm not hungry. At the end of the music video after their vows, the man removed the ring and give it back to her and she walks out removing the ring.
What if this happened to us? What if this will happen and I will be very embarrassed? I wanted to be swallow by the floor because of embarrassment. Right? He loved his life out there is free, screwing different women every day and night. A tear fell from my eyes as I thought lots of things. Damn! I just want to stop thinking right now.
I stayed there for hours until there's a video call from the tablet and I answer it. It's him and he's not talking, and he flashes papers that have his words. Saying sorry. That he promised to be a good husband and just get this wedding on. I hang up and send him the music video of Tell Me You Love Me. That's the only thing I know how to communicate. Through music.
I didn't eat breakfast and go on working out instead. Then lunch came and I must eat. Someone knocks on the door and I put my shirt on and open it. Warren smiled and lifted a pizza.
"Hi there Casanova."
"You are stressed and everything. Let's eat outside." I nodded and follow him.
We started eating after heating the pizza. He told me different things about Zachary that his father is a womanizer and left his mom and his mom just disappear. When Zachary got broken-hearted to his first love he never believes in love and just took the pleasure of women that are raining on him.
I understand him. But wasn't it a good reason enough for him to be a faithful partner? The truth is I don't know if dad is having an affair, but I heard things. Mom said that he's faithful and a good husband. And as I recall my traumatic moments when I was a child and on how he become angry was shuddering. I always feel like going to cry whenever I recall that night and those days.
Would Zachary be like my father? Would Zachary hurt me physically?
"What are you thinking?" I sniffled and eat pizza.
"Just things. Does he ever hurt a woman before?"
"No. Zac won't do that thing though he'll get mad. I trust the guy."
"Can I ask you why you become a Casanova?"
"Well, it's because of my friends. My ex-wife died through childbirth."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean."
"It's alright. I have to move on and just feel the pain." He smiled. "She almost really looks like you. The same height and almost everything. She's sensitive as well and she gave too much love. I was a playboy back then and she just made me the man in love, the faithful man, the man who is responsible."
"That's very touching. Haven't you thought of falling in love again?" he looked at me like I was fragile.
"I can't seem to fall in love." He shrugged. "But I'll try. I guess I'm a little too late." I nodded didn't ask any further.
"It's not too late," I told him. "As long as you are alive." I wink at him.
"Can I take you out away? Let's ditch this wedding." I stop for a while. He's serious.
"You are kidding me."
"Yup." He started laughing. "If you could only see your face." I throw him a few pastries and he kept laughing. "What if I ask you that, would you go with me?" I had thought. I love Zachary. I told that myself.