Chereads / A Starry Wish / Chapter 5 - Reasoning

Chapter 5 - Reasoning

Yuuma and I walked home, without saying anything. I wondered what is he thinking right now... I merely thought that I wanted him to kiss me, and my first kiss is now gone forever.

That kiss proved something. It proved that I actually can make things happen in my favour, and about the sudden change of events right after I blinked my eye, I take it as I was leaping through a world? This is confusing. I walked while thinking. Without me noticing, I already reached my house alongside with Yuuma's.

"I'm heading this way," Yuuma said, in an embarrassing tone.

"Uh... Me too. See you again tomorrow...?" I replied, awkwardly.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow..." Yuuma replied.

I walked into my house gate, Yuuma suddenly shouted.

"Rinka-chan, can we... walk to school together?" He asked, embarrassingly.

Ba-dump! My heart goes. I have no idea about what I'm feeling right now, but he's so cute!

"Uh uh, let's do that tomorrow," I replied. I wonder how red is our faces are right now. I'm both embarrassed and happy. Without further ado, I rushed back to my room upstairs.

I pounced towards my bed, covering my face with my pillow. Rethinking of what happened just now, I'm in love, I thought. Things would be awkward if a kiss just happened out of nowhere, we are not even dating... Should I just go along the flow? Like just become his girlfriend immediately? Kyaaaaaa! I can't stop having all these embarrassing thoughts!

I got up from my bed, walking towards my study desk, hoping that my dairy is there. When I opened my drawer, I find a notebook resembling my dairy I had back in my world. However, it was empty, more like, erased. I think that is also a part of the information where Ryutenji wiped out so that this world will become more balanced.

Since my dairy is gone, I just have to write a new one, so I began writing.

Dear diary,

Today I learned more about this world, a world where a possibility that Yuuma is still alive exists.

I cannot use my name, or mention anything that will connect them to my world. Otherwise, they would get very confused and become petrified.

I also learned that the one who is responsible is the Rain Goddess, Ame. She implied that I have to go through a "trial" of hers before I could see my wish come true. If I have to believe that this is an alternate world, where Yuuma didn't die, then this whole "trial" thing has to be true.

If I try to make this whole story logic, Yuuma didn't die mainly because he didn't confess to me that day, and if that never happens, that means that I was never even once existed in his life. That explains why I'm moving over when I came to this world.

I still have doubts about this world. What am I supposed to do in this world? What do I need to do for the "trial"? Am I allowed to fall in love with Yuuma in this world?

I couldn't think of anything more to write in my diary, for now, I stopped writing and then kept the dairy back in where I took it out.

In the next day, I woke up with black circles around my eyes, I couldn't sleep thinking about Yuuma. Today is a day which I'll walk to school with Yuuma. I quickly get myself ready, I head downstairs and see my dad sitting on the chair in the same pose as the last dinner. I sighed and grabbed some bread to make some toast.

Oddly, the only person that changed places is my mom. She came inside the house from outside, she came to me and whispered to my ear.

"Are you going to school together with Yuuma-kun?" My mom told me as if shes gossiping with me. I blushed and nodded. Her mood livened, she quickly went over and gossiped to dad. He too became excited and laughed.

I shook my head and sighed, at least my parents here looked normal for once. I've been worried about them as if I'm living with just dolls that only moved when I paid attention to them. Oddly, money doesn't seem to exist here, I can't count my money in my purse, I took out coins from them to cashiers, then accepted them and tells me that I've completed my payment. Perhaps the goddess hates money?

I sat down and ate my breakfast, to think that mom knew what will happen next, perhaps he's already waiting outside? Oh my, seriously? I finished my toast and quickly head out. I grabbed my shoes and quickly put them on. I opened my house gate, I see Yuuma.

"G-good morning Rinka-chan...?" He said, embarrassingly. I nodded slightly and walks in front.

"Hey wait, why are you walking that fast? It's still early..." Yuuma said reluctantly. Oh my, I can't tell him that I'm trying to hide my embarrassing face!

I continued to walk on my pace, Yuuma then started walking as well. He tried to prompt a conversation, but I'm not good with them, I think I just made it more awkward. My brain is in a mess, I have not prepared for this, not yet!

The usual traffic light just turned red as I noticed it, oh my... Now he is catching up...

"Hey Rinka-chan, wait for me!" Yuuma caught up, panting.

"No one asked for you to follow me!" I blurted. Oh no... I've done it again... I covered my mouth, as I have said something that I shouldn't. Yuuma smiled. What on earth is he smiling at now?

"Rinka-chan is being embarrassed is it? So cute! Hahaha!" Yuuma teased. It's so reminiscent that he teased me like this before, I teared up and before I noticed, I'm already embracing him.

"Rinka-chan? Why did you suddenly...?" Yuuma is surprised, while also feeling excited. Wait, what am I doing?! I pushed him away, and noticed the traffic light that turns green after a while. I began crossing the road, so did he.

He walked next to me, and we started to see more students of our school on their way to school. That reminds me of Ryutenji's explanation, people who I didn't know much, although not directly manipulated by me, they still exist, and play their own roles independently. However, what if they were like this since yesterday? It wouldn't make sense. Since if it's after school, they should be moving away from the school, not heading towards the school as they are now.

It's a paradox to me, exactly what happened to these people. Although, I don't think I have to understand their behaviors to be able to return to my world, I couldn't help but being bothered by the fact that there is something abnormal in this world, something that I couldn't comprehend just yet. If I'm here because of the Rain Goddess, then what is my trial? I've never been told about this at all.

I came back to my senses, to notice that Yuuma was trying to reach my hand hesitantly. Out of curiosity, I grabbed his hand and walked faster. He is sure surprised, as well as being excited. I wonder if I can change those people who liked Yuuma, into people who didn't like him in the first place.

I held his hand and walked into the school, I'm sure we attracted a lot of attention, since dating is prohibited in school, yet there are a lot of them doing it, secretly. On the moment we stepped into the school, the teachers acted like they saw nothing, just like what I wanted. I can feel that Yuuma is trying to take his hand off, because we attracted too much attention.

I let go his hand, he quickly put that hand I held moments earlier into his blazer's pocket. He blushed and looked away, he's not just blushing slightly, it seems like his face is as red as a tomato! I find it funny and cute, but when my senses returned to me, that's embarrassing as heck! I quickly looked away, unable to confirm how embarrassed I am, I think I'm as red as Yuuma as well.

Classes are about to start, we still walked together, because we are in the same class. Walking on a familiar corridor with Yuuma by my side seems so dreamy. I worked so hard to avoid being seen as someone related to Yuuma, I always walked with my back hunched, trying to avoid gazes from people who might be one of the envious ones, is no longer the case for now. If I can change the world as I wanted, I could have changed this world into a world where no one will be envious or hateful because I'm close to the guy I love the most.

This world... Despite not my original world, is more befitting to be called as "my world" rather than the one I came from. Perhaps, I should just stay in this world of mine, realizing all the dreams that I once only dare to dream in my sleep, into reality. This is not a trial, but a blessing, thank you, Ame!