I didn't want to do it, really I didn't. Caden became defensive when Penelope's name was brought up. For the next six months, it became bothersome to cater to both Penelope and Caden's needs. I stayed with Penelope almost 24/7 just in case her water broke. Caden didn't seem to understand I was only staying with Penelope for the love for my daughter. My Father nor my mother liked Penelope's family, I had yet to meet them. Penelope and I usually stayed in her mansion alone with the endless money we had. I was overwhelmed at times when I had to see Caden. I felt like a bad father already. I stayed with him on the last four weeks of every month. On one particular night my phone had woke me up as I slept next to Caden. I groaned as I picked up my phone from the nightstand. I answered the phone rather quickly "Hello?"
"Im freaking the f**k out, Lior. My water broke and I really don't want to go to the hospital without you!"
I immediately jumped out of bed without giving her a response, I woke Caden by accident. Caden sighed "Please just fucking leave already."
He covered his ears with a pillow before turning the other way. I rolled my eyes as I put my shorts on, then a plain white t-shirt. I mumbled under my breath "Might just leave forever." I almost forgot Penelope was still on the phone "Baby-"
I stopped myself as Penelope and I both paused. I stuttered realizing my mistake "I-I um, I'll try to be there in ten minutes tops if contractions get worse call an ambulance, and then I'll meet you at the hospital."
Caden glared at me "Leave, now."
Instead of arguing with Caden I left, grabbing my keys off the kitchen table, I got in the car and started speeding to Penelope's house. The call had disconnected, I became frantic as I tried to call her back with no response. I finally pulled up to the gates, none of the bodyguards were there to open it . Without thinking I rammed into the gate breaking it completely, I felt the impact of the airbag, I felt my bloody nose. But my adrenaline was still kicking, I ran to the door to see bodyguards and paramedics surrounding Penelope. I knocked as one of the bodyguards opened the door, suddenly I heard Penelope yell and a loud high pitched cry. I wiped my bloody nose and chuckled a bit "I'm glad you're both okay", I felt myself becoming dizzy after I saw Penelope holding our newborn daughter. I finally passed out after ten more seconds of standing, before my hearing gave out I heard her worried cry, her screaming my name. The last thing I saw were one of the paramedics running to me.
I woke up to a worried Penelope with an IV setup. She squeezed my had then kissed it "You were so worried you crashed the car into the gate because you thought something was wrong, how brave of you."
I felt the bandages on my head "Oh."
She gave me a smile with her slightly blushed cheeks "Would you like to hold Jackie?"
Just her name made me smile "You do have to sign the birth certificate but her name is Jacqueline Celine Mayes."
I smiled "Celine? Where'd you come up with that."
She looked shy "I was watching Titanic, and instead of thinking about Kate Winslet, I heard "My Heart will go on" and thought Celine would be cute since Celine Dion sung such a cute song."
I chuckled and nodded, I was so eager to hold Jackie. As soon as she handed her to me I melted, I about cried. My bond with her was so strong, the feeling to protect her with my life was overwhelming. Her coo made time stop, I didn't want to let go of her, a mild concussion couldn't stop me from being with her. I almost forgot about the DNA test, my bond didn't break but my heart almost did. "Penelope?", I asked.
"Yeah, Lior?"
I narrowed my eyes "Did you order the DNA test yet?"
She became speechless for at least a minute, she almost turned pale. She looked at me "Okay."
She pressed the call button and uncontrollably asked the nurse for a DNA test. I sighed when the nurse told us it would be four to six weeks. I looked at Penelope "We can hold off for a least a year, I'll take care of her for right now."
Penelope thanked the nurse for her time and hugged me tightly "Lior, thank you."
I nodded, I was surprised to be interrupted by Caden walking in unannounced. He brought flowers and a teddy bear. "Caden you don't have to-
"These aren't for you", he spoke slowly.
I looked at him in shock "Here Penelope, Congratulations on your kid. I'm sorry I was such an asshole, Lior means a lot to me and if you and your daughter mean a lot to him I would like to be involved at least a little. I think I'm good with kids ya know and putting on cocomelon and shit."
She giggled a bit "Of course, Caden."
———————
One Year Later:
————————
Just when I thought I wouldn't have to do it. Caden was the best fit when taking care of my daughter. He was fairly patient and playful with her, I made memories with him filling up a kiddie pool for her. I tried to video tape every memory, the day we got the results were one of the best days of my life. She was 99.9% my daughter, I saw it as she grew too. She had Penelope's brunette hair but my eyes. During that long day of filling up the kiddie pool on a hot summer's day Penelope came out with Iced tea for Caden and I. Penelope had pecked my lips as she had done a million times before, Caden clenched the tea and nearly lost his shit. "You swore up and down you guys weren't doing anything?"
I lost my smile for at least a minute "Keep her out of this, it's about you and me."
"I knew she was a whore, she didn't even know if the kid was yours or not!", Caden yelled. I saw the hurt look on Penelope's face and lost my sh*t.
I pushed Penelope away gently and grabbed my daughter away from him quickly. Penelope quickly took her inside "The fuck is wrong with you", I shoved him into the side wall of the house. "You lied to me…", he muttered.
"You-", I cut him off.
"We're taking a break, I can't do this shit anymore Caden, I fucking can't not infront of my kid, not infront of Penelope. Please, leave Caden, leave!"
Caden had a look of disbelief on his face, he nearly teared up before leaving in the car I had bought him.
I turned off the hose before heading inside I gently picked up my daughter and talked to Penelope "He won't bother you anymore, we're on a break."
Penelope had a sad look in her eyes "I didn't mean to…"
"It's okay, it's not you, I think his meds make him paranoid but it's no excuse to act like that."
Penelope nodded, she then pulled out a bottle of wine from the fridge "Here, pour a glass."
I put Jackie down and figured I would at least have a sip, but one sip turned into a whole glass and a whole glass a whole bottle while Penelope only took a shot. My tolerance was high so I still felt sober. Penelope gave me a weird stare "You're such a good dad, you know that right?"
I nodded as she approached me "Yeah-"
She grabbed my polo and kissed me, the flavor of wine was on her lips. The need I felt to satisfy her became intense even though I knew I wasn't attracted to her like that. But I wanted to satisfy the only person who was never satisfied, the one person who wanted to care more then Caden. I kissed her back grabbing her left breast, I then spotted Jackie starring. I then pointed at the maid "Ellie could you babysit for a bit, I'll pay you extra from my own pockets."
Ellie had nodded as Jackie had followed her. I then took off my shirt as the kissing had got intense. Penelope fell on her knees, I had to think about sex with Caden to get me going a bit though I didn't want to think of him at all. I squeezed the edge of the counter as she finished. I decided to carry her on my back. She giggled as I walked upstairs, the intense feelings I have from mutual affection made me feel a bit sad. I made sure she was satisfied even in my drunken daze. I let her sink her nails in my back, I did whatever she wished. Her legs quivered a bit before she let out a satisfied pant. I finally let the alcohol get to me, I passed out.
——-
The next day I woke up nauseous, I ran across our room into our bathroom and vomited. I felt like shit, I cheated on him. I felt like the worst person alive, guilt had consumed me. Penelope wrapped her robe around her body and patted me on the back "Should we get married?", she asked.
I glared at her for only a second "I cheated on Caden, this isn't the time."
"But I-", Penelope tried to reason with me.
"I was drunk Penelope, please not right now."
She nodded before leaving the room, I broke down , how could I? How could I do that to him. I grabbed my phone and texted Caden if I could come over, I thought it was off he had texted me "I love you". I had a strange feeling of deja vu, I immediately put on a blue polo and khaki shorts. I immediately headed downstairs with my keys in hand "Where are you going?", Penelope asked.
"To Caden's house, I'll be back", I spoke.
She gave me a sad nod "Please come back before noon."
I nodded before closing the door. I started our new car and frantically speeded onto the highway. I passed my house, I passed the gas station, I sat at the red light reminded of the first time we met. As the light turned green I immediately turned the corner and drove for at least another ten minutes before I pulled up to Caden's house. I anxiously knocked on the door, I then twisted the doorknob and to my surprise the door had opened. I got this chill down my spine, I walked further into the dark house "Caden! Caden!", I called his name frantically. I walked into his bed room immediately spotting him slumped over on his night stand, I walked past the clear table in his room spotting the lines of cocaine. "Caden! Caden!" I yelled. He mumbled incoherently. I immediately ran to his side, I nearly lost my mind when I saw the track marks near his inner elbow. I checked his pulse, it was weak. I felt my hands shake as I pulled out my phone dialing 9-1-1. The operator told me help was on the way but he started seizing. I immediately dragged him off the bed, pushing the glass table away. I made sure he didn't bite his tongue, then suddenly the seizing stopped. I sat there too stunned to speak. I checked his pulse again as my hand started to shake again. I thought I felt a pulse but I couldn't concentrate anymore. I started to sob over his body. The paramedics came in time, I watched them declare him dead on scene after five cycles of cpr. They asked me who I was, and I told them. They told me they were going to call a coroner and the coroner would call me for funereal preparations and all. I nodded, hiding my grief. I left, I stumbled trying my best to walk to my car. I wasn't in the right mind to drive to Penelope's house, so I stopped four blocks away at my parents house. I stumbled out my car and rang the doorbell, as soon as I saw my mother's worried face I cried. "Caden's dead, he's dead mom!"
My mother held me for as long as she could as my father wasn't home. Connor stood in the kitchen listening to everything with my sister asking Connor what happened. She immediately ran over to me hugging me tightly. My mom gently told her to give me space and walked me to the guest room downstairs. She called Penelope to come get me after I had calmed down. I overheard her in the kitchen as Penelope was on speaker. "Hey? Could you get Lior, we have so much going on today and he needs more than I could give him, Caden died ."
Penelope gasped "I'm on my way."
Penelope was there in no time she sat on the bed "I'm sorry, but I brought Jackie, I didn't know if she would help."
I stared at my brunette haired girl climbing up the bed and all I could do was hold her as I cried. My daughter stared at me with her big blue eyes "Dada!"
I got up and looked at Penelope "Let's go home, please."
She nodded, we drove in silence the way there, a piece of me died that day, really it did.
———
Day after Day I couldn't get up out of bed, I couldn't take care of Jackie. I sat there rotting, all I could do was cry. I couldn't eat at all, all I could do was try to shower and even so it resulted in me sitting in the tub as the water poured over me. I only wore shorts and a tank top. But then, there was one particular night where I heard the door creak open. "Lucas?", I heard a broad voice.
My eyes widened . I glanced over at the door, it was Senator Tom Buck, Penelope's father. I stared at him with a glare "You get my father killed and still want to call his name?"
Senator Buck dropped his bags "My wife was the one who got him killed, our divorce is official now ."
I quickly turned my head so I faced away from him. I felt Senator Buck stare at me "Look, Lucas, I mean Lior…, I swear I won't hurt you, if anything this should help you."
I didn't care anymore, everything was an illusion without Caden. I stared at him as he locked the door behind him and gently climbed on top of the bed. "Don't worry, Penelope and Jackie are out right now."
I faced him as he pressed his lips onto mine, he lifted up my tank top kissing my chest. He then pulled my shorts down, as soon as I felt his mouth on the tip of my penis. I got intense flashbacks of Caden , I came immediately. "I'm sorry", I apologized trying not to cry. He looked up wiping his mouth "I promise you it's okay."
He then pulled his pants down, then pulled my shorts down. I felt him put himself into me, it was an intense feeling. He was bigger than Caden, I clenched the sheets tightly as I groaned. Senator Buck gently held my head forcing me to make eye contact with him. He placed my hand on his back "Claw my back if it hurts, hurt me if I hurt you", he groaned.
How Ironic? Senator Buck despised gay marriage, he talked about it in the media a lot. If anything he hates what he is yet he embraces it privately.
I listened to him , I silently cried a little. He slowed down "Are you okay?"
I stared at him, blankly, then I kissed his lips "Keep going", I groaned. He regained his pace, until he went faster and faster. He gently fell on top of me trembling a bit, breathing hard. He sighed, he gently sat up then glanced at me "You should marry my daughter. You have nothing else to lose, even if you're not sexually attracted to her, I'll satisfy that."
I stared at him, too tired to speak.
"Well think about it", he lit a cigarette before he got dressed.
——
Three Months Later:
Ever since then when he came around we slept together, it's sad but true, it's helped me get over Caden. I couldn't bring myself to tell my father or anyone at that. I started taking care of Jackie again, I made sure Penelope smiled. I kept Caden's ashes on the bookshelf, and I said hi to him every day as if he were still alive. One day, I sat at the kitchen table as Jackie was off at daycare and as Penelope watched the Housewives of Somewhere I got on one knee "Penelope Elizabeth Pickets… will you marry me?"
End of Lior's Complex.
Upcoming Chapter: My Girlfriend's Dad[I swear this one will have a happy ending].